This isn't how Ben imagined telling her about his demons. There is a part of him that considered never telling her, but he knows he owes her honesty. But blurting out his failures on the interstate still a half hour outside Alderaan is not something he ever imagined doing.

His eyes are on the road as he waits for her reaction. He can't look at her anymore right now. He doesn't think he can handle the disappointment or the horror or the disgust or whatever else she may be feeling. He keeps his eyes on the traffic in front of him as the silence stretches for what feels like forever, but what is probably only about ten seconds.

"I've never seen you drink," she says.

That is not what he expected, but he still doesn't look at her. He's chewing at the inside of his cheek, waiting for the other shoe to drop, when she continues. "We spend a lot of time together, but I've never seen you consume any alcohol. Even that night at the bar…"

Ben clears his throat. "You wouldn't have seen it and you won't see it ever. I'm a recovering alcoholic, Rey. I haven't had a drink in over two years."

She's quiet for a moment. Then, "So what happened back there was an epic overreaction…"

Ben snorts and chances a glance at her. Her brows are pinched and she looks confused, as though trying to piece together something that just doesn't make sense. "Yeah, overreaction would be the appropriate term."

"You live above a bar - a bar that you've visited - and haven't fallen off the wagon, but your uncle is worried because you bought your dad some whiskey?"

She doesn't sound near as horrified as he thought she would. Ben nods, "It's like Luke forgets that I could buy liquor any time I want. Being an alcoholic doesn't bar me from buying any. If I really wanted it, I could buy it any time, but I buy some for my dad and get scolded like a child."

Ben takes the exit that will lead them back into downtown. He's not sure how comfortable she is with him now that he's spilled the beans about his addiction, but even if she wants to go home, she'll have to get her car first, so he heads to his apartment.

"I know that's probably more baggage than you thought you'd be dealing with…" He starts.

"Oh, no you don't," she cuts in, the tone of her voice carrying a warning. "Don't even act like you're going to play martyr and give me a way out, Solo. You're stuck with me."

He fights a smile even as something in his chest twists painfully. She doesn't know what she's saying. If she had been there to see what he'd turned into- the anger, the self-hatred, the violent fits that saw him destroying everything in his path- it's a kind of ugly that he knows she couldn't overlook, not with her past being what it is.

When they make it to his apartment, Rey heads straight for the rear entrance, not even looking in the direction of her car. He knows her grand statement in the car wasn't a lie, but he also wonders if she will say she needs some space after witnessing all his family drama. He follows after her slowly and she's waiting for him in front of his door.

He lets her in and she immediately takes off her coat.

"Do I get my present now?" She asks, collapsing on his couch. Her eyes are already trained on the box under the tree with her name on it.

"Rey…"

"Hmm?" She looks up and must see something in his face. She frowns and sits up straighter, patting at the spot next to her.

Ben heaves a sigh and makes his way toward her, taking the seat she's offered. He can't relax though, so he sits with his elbows on his knees, chewing at his thumbnail, knowing that they need to talk, that he needs to talk. Rey actually seems fine with moving on from their conversation, but Ben is hung up on it.

"It wasn't pretty, Rey," he tells her, his eyes are fixed on one of the ornaments hanging from his tree. It's one of the pipe cleaners she had twisted until she'd managed to shape it like a snowflake. It looks like a second grader crafted it and Ben fucking loves it.

"Okay," she says, sliding her hand around his bicep and leaning into him. "I'm guessing alcoholism is never pretty, Ben."

"You would've hated me."

"I could never hate you," she insists. "Besides, that's not who you are now and isn't that what matters?"

"If you had been around back then, there's no way that-" He stops and takes a breath, feeling a little winded just from the thought of not having her in his life. He can't even bring himself to say it. There's no way that you would want me.

"I wasn't around back then," she says casually. "I'm here now, though, so don't-" She lets out something between a sigh and a growl of frustration. "Don't pull away from me because you're worried about what I'd think about your past self, okay? I'm here and I'm pretty crazy about you."

He looks at her then, at the earnest, open expression on her face, the look in those hazel eyes that begs him to let her words sink in. He leans over, his hand finding her cheek, and his mouth finds hers. And it's crazy, really, how touching her instantly makes the pain subside. He isn't sure he can put a name to what he feels for her; he only knows that it's big and all-consuming, something that can create or destroy. And he's terrified.

But he's never been one for self-preservation anyway.

When she pulls away, it's too soon, and Ben gives her playful pout that coaxes out her dimples.

"I want my present now," she informs him.

And what else can he do but give her what she wants?

The lightness she feels when he looks at her like that is indescribable. Rey feels like she could float away into the abyss still smiling. He gets off the couch to fulfill her demands, but has to pry his arm out of her grasp because she doesn't want to let go of him. She's still beaming when he makes his way to the tree.

She unabashedly checks out his ass when he bends over to lift the gifts they've bought one another. He seems clueless as to what she was looking at when he turns around. Poor, dumb, beautiful boy, Rey thinks as he comes back to the couch to join her.

Ben sets a small box in her lap and then sets his considerably larger box in his. Rey is anxious for him to open his first, wanting to see his reaction, but the look on his face dampens some of her excitement. He's frowning as he looks between the two boxes.

"Ben, what…?"

"Maybe I should've gotten you something else," he says, chewing on the corner of his lip. "I mean, it's not a shit gift by any means, but it just…"

"Oh, my God, Ben!" She slaps his thigh and it seems to snap him out of his ridiculousness. "Open your gift."

"Fine," he grumbles, carefully peeling the tape away from the paper as though he's trying to preserve it.

"You can just rip into, you know," she says.

"But you worked so hard on the wrapping," he insists as he unfolds the flap.

Rey rolls her eyes and tries to be patient as she watches him unwrap his gift like he's handling a bomb. Finally, finally, Ben gets the paper off and stares down at the wooden chess board. The board is a carrying case, carrying the hand-carved pieces inside. Ben looks up at her and gifts her with that boyish grin that drives her crazy.

She feels a blush heating her cheeks, but manages to tell him. "The pieces and the board are also magnetic. You mentioned that you used to play with your Dad, I figured maybe you could teach me…"

She doesn't finish the thought before he's leaned in and kissed her again. "Thanks, sweetheart," he murmurs against her lips. "Just promise you won't be pissed when I kick your ass."

"Benjamin! I'll have you know I have incredible beginner's luck with most things. Just promise you won't cry when I spank you at your little boardgame."

"Hmm spanking," Ben says with a mischievous glint in his eye.

"Don't look at me like that. I haven't even opened my gift yet and we're getting off track," she laughs as she turns her attention to the little box in her lap. She tears off the wrapping paper, cutting her eyes at Ben just in time to see him wince theatrically at her unwrapping skills. She quickly sticks her tongue out at him before turning her attention to the box. Of course, it's taped like he's trying to prevent her from actually getting into it. She huffs as she tears at the adhesive, finally flipping open the box.

Inside is what appears to be a mint green bracelet. Her first thought is that she likes the color - green is her favorite color. The second is that she thinks what she's looking at is some kind of smart watch. As she's lifting it out though, she realizes that the center of the watch doesn't have a watch face, but instead the head of a certain very famous mouse.

"Ben," she breathes, holding it up to confirm that she is indeed looking at the Mouse. "What- is this-"

"It's a Magic Band," he tells her, as though he's not sure if she actually knows that. She definitely does, though not because she's ever had the fortune of using one.

"Yes, I know," she says, slightly impatiently. "But why- what does it-"

And Ben, bless him, is patient as he listens to her ramble. "You use these for everything inside the parks. I can link it up to my credit card, it's our room key, it's how we use Fast Passes…"

"Ben!" She interrupts him, and he looks up at her, eyes wide and innocent. "Does this mean that I'm- that we're-" Holy fuck, why can she not talk? And then, of course, she feels the sting of hers in her eyes.

His brows deep down the second he notices. "Rey, hey, it's- I'm sorry, do you not want to…"

"Shut up," she tells him, flinging her arms around his neck. "Or rather, before you shut up, please explain to me what...:"

"Our vacation in January? I've already booked it. Hope it's okay. Florida is apparently nice year round…"

"You're taking me to Disney?" She finally croaks, burying her face in his neck.

"Yes?"

She scrambles onto his lap then, wrapping her legs around his waist and pecking his cheek with kisses. She feels the rumble of his chuckle in his chest rather than hears it.

"I did okay then?" He asks.

"You did perfect."

This is why I didn't get into family law.

Ben's blissful holiday had ended all too soon and now he finds himself sitting in a conference room with a client who seems to be on the verge of a nervous breakdown due to his divorce. Ben has never been able to handle people who cry, especially people he doesn't know well. The man sitting across from him has tears swimming in his eyes.

"She leaves me, then she wants my kids, and now she wants half my retirement? I don't know what I did to make her want to bleed me dry."

Ben clears his throat. "Mr. Peters, I'm going to remind you that just because this is what your wife is asking for doesn't mean that you have to agree to it or that the judge will grant it. It's unlikely that she will get full custody since the two of you live within ten minutes of one another and you have a healthy relationship with your children."

"She has a career of her own!" The client goes on, shaking his head as he stares down at the table. "She makes better money than I do and I'm sure she has her own retirement account…" Mr. Peters pauses, rubbing at his eyes. "I must sound terrible, complaining about the money she wants…"

"It's a tense time," Ben says, really wanting to move on from this. Gently, he tries to segue to the true purpose of the meeting. "Now, she's let us know what she wants, so what are some things that we need to counter with?"

"Shared custody," Mr. Peters says immediately. "It's not fair…"

"You should ask for full custody," Ben suggests. "It's what she's done and, while it's unlikely that the judge will give either of you full, sole custody, she's set a precedent by asking for it first."

Mr. Peters covers his eyes. "She's going to hate me if I do that…"

She already hates you, Ben thinks, but manages to not say it out loud. Instead, he says, "You shouldn't be concerned with trying to make her happy. Your priority here should be fairness."

When his client moves his hand, Ben sees the utter brokenness of the man in front of him. He looks so tired and sad and just...resigned. Ben's not great at empathy with most people, so he moves the meeting along, taking notes on what his client wants to ask for in their answer to Mrs. Peters's petition.

Ben breathes a sigh of relief when the man leaves his office. He wonders if his father ever acted like that, felt like that, when his marriage to Leia was ending. Outwardly, Han hadn't shown much more than aggravation. Had Han kept his facade up in front of his family while having a breakdown in front of his attorney? Ben has access to the divorce records, could easily pull it up, but it's part of the ugliness of his family that he doesn't want to know.

Ben looks at his parents' marriage as a cautionary tale for anyone thinking opposites can make it work. He knows from stories that it was a whirlwind romance that culminated in a thrown-together wedding after Leia found out she was pregnant.

Leia had been in her senior year of college, and while she graduated on time - though with a very obvious bump - she had had to put off law school for a year. And then, after Ben's first birthday she was just...gone. All the time.

Between studying for law school and clerking, Leia had never been home. Han had, for a time, and Ben has memories of his dad trying to cook them supper and letting him fall asleep with the television on.

But Han had grown resentful and eventually he found a way to bail too. He'd started working out of town, so Leia had dipped into her savings account that her parents had set up and hired a nanny.

Ben supposes he was a difficult child. Overly sensitive, his father said once. Too temperamental, Leia explained. He was an affectionate child with no one around to love him, so he became angry. All that anger later resulted in numerous fights at school. Ben pushes away that line of thinking though - he has never been one to blame his parents for his failings, though he often feels that he is the reason for his parents' failings.

Han and Leia's epic breakup is one reason why Ben has a negative view of marriage, but handling divorce cases reinforces his skepticism of the institution. Half of marriages end in divorce and Ben can't understand why so many people bother with it. Even if two people fall in love and have a somewhat healthy relationship, it can be argued that people are always changing - their wants and needs change and the two people that fell in love initially become two completely different people over time - and then they wake up one day and look at the stranger sitting across the table from them and wonder how they got there.

Ben doesn't necessarily think that that's what happened with his parents. He doubts either of them have drastically changed, but what they wanted certainly did. He imagines that, at first, the fact that they challenged one another made things interesting. But as the years went on, it must have gotten tiring.

Now, Ben has a front row seat to the dissolution of marriages everyday. Is it really worth all this - that's the question that plays on a loop inside his head as he watches the foundations crack on families on a day to day basis. He can't understand why people give themselves over to another person, opening themselves up to be crushed completely. He can't remember the last time he believed in something lasting. All things are temporary, afterall.

That thought brings him up short as his mind drifts to Rey. He tries to keep thoughts of her separate from his more pessimistic musings, but his brain seems unable to keep from focusing on her for too lengthy of a period. He doesn't want to bring her into this, doesn't want to think about Rey in relation to how he feels about marriage, but the seed is there and he can't stop it.

He can't imagine being without her. He likens meeting her to the sun finally coming up and illuminating his miserable life. He cringes at his own mental description, but it is what it is. Every moment he has with her means the world to him and he hasn't been reluctant with his affection towards her. But he doesn't want to go too far, doesn't want to fall into something that will leave him in the kind of condition that that poor bastard Peters is in. Ben has had pathetic moments in his life and he is done with them.

He worries that maybe he's already on a slippery slope with Rey though. He's never been in love and he isn't going to call this...thing with Rey that either, though he can't help but admit it's stronger than anything else he's felt. He knows he could fall in love with Rey - anyone can fall in love, but he feels like he's adept enough at self control that he can keep a handle on his emotions.

It will end one day, he knows that. Ben is Ben, after all - messy and difficult and grumpy. And someday, Rey will change her mind about him, his flaws will no longer be endearing, and she will leave. Ben knows that he probably needs to practice a little more self-preservation where she is concerned.

And after all, at some point, Luke will get better and Ben will move back to Coruscant. It's only a matter of time.

But for now, he can enjoy what he has with Rey. For now, he can hold her and do nice things for her and pretend that he deserves her. He has no delusions about their future, but sometimes, it's nice to forget about the end for a while.

"The man got you a trip to Disney?!"

"Shh!" Rey hisses at Rose, glancing behind her to the mostly empty courtroom. They've just returned from lunch and most of the clients set on the two o'clock docket haven't shown up yet. One person looks up at Rose's outburst, only mildly curious, before looking away again. "Yes," Rey answers her.

"But you've been dating, what, like right at two months? Rey, that poor man must be nuts about you."

"Well, the feeling is mutual," she murmurs, feeling a smile tug at her mouth at the thought of Ben.

"Wow, you two are in so deep," Rose says, shaking her head. "And I can't even get a date from a guy that doesn't creep me out."

A fit of coughing startles both girls and they jump before turning to look at Finn, who has just entered through the side door. He clears his throat. "The, uh, prisoners are out in the hallway. Wanted to make sure that you guys are ready for them…" He jerks his thumb towards the door and pointedly avoids looking at Rose.

"Oh, you can bring them in here whenever you're ready," Rose says. "The judge will probably want to see them first anyway."

"Good, cool, I'll bring them in now," Finn mumbles and opens the door to let the inmates through.

Rey shakes her head, wondering how in the world these two idiots haven't figured it out yet, when Rose continues. "So, just a few weeks til vacation then. I'm guessing excited doesn't even begin to cover it, huh?"

Rey shakes her head. "I'm still in denial, I think. It's going to sound stupid, probably, but it's like a dream come true. As a kid, I always wanted to go - I mean, what kid doesn't? - but I knew I'd never get to. What's weird is that Ben's never been either."

"Really? That's crazy. I mean, he's Leia's son and they've always had money, you said...she never took him on vacation?"

"Not to Disney World, apparently," Rey bites her lip, unsure if she should share the rest of what she knows. But she needs someone to talk to besides Ben, so she goes for it. "Honestly, I'm not sure she took him anywhere. She traveled a lot, but Ben said he was left at home ⁸most of the time while she traveled. I can't...I don't know...I can't imagine not taking my kids with me on any vacations. I get that she probably needed some adult time, and she was busy, but to never take him anywhere?" Rey shakes her head, willing herself to stop because she's afraid she's dipping into judgmental territory, which she tries not to do. But because she has a vested interest in Ben's feelings and his past, she can't quite shake her disapproval of how his parents handled things.

"To be honest, it is hard to picture that dude at Disney," Rose admits. "He's so serious. Does he even like fun?"

"Rose!" Rey rolls her eyes and grins at her friend. "Of course he does. It's just that his idea of fun is like, solving puzzles and playing chess...and, oh, organization." Rey snickers. "You should see how he put up the Christmas decorations. Everything has labels. I'm not sure I've ever seen him look so pleased with something that didn't involve sex."

Rose covers her giggle with her hand. "God, Rey, you're dating a nerd!"

"I know!"

"A really hot nerd, but still!"

"Those are the best kind though!"

"Right?!"

"Ladies, what is so funny?" Jannah appears at Rey's side, draping an arm over her shoulder.

"Ben Solo is a nerd," Rose summarizes, snorting as she separates the files for the afternoon dockets.

Jannah frowns. "I could've told you that months ago."

"And he's taking our little Rey of Sunshine to Disney in a few weeks!"

"Whoa! Maybe I need to find myself a nerd," Jannah gives her a wink. "Just not one as grouchy as Solo."

The afternoon proves to be busy and Rey doesn't get the pleasure of ogling Ben in court because apparently he has other things to do, but when she leaves the building just after five o'clock, he's waiting in the parking lot, his car parked next to hers. She feels a smile break out onto her face and jogs the rest of the way to him.

"I, uh, didn't want you walking out into the dark parking lot by yourself," he explains, as though he needs to give her a reason for waiting on her after work.

She beams up at him and then pecks him on the cheek. "Best boyfriend ever," she teases, but as she watches him roll his eyes, she admits that it's not really a joke, nor is she being overly sentimental.

As he opens her door and kisses her nose, murmuring quietly about whose place they're going to, Rey realizes with a sudden rush of affection that Ben might just be the best thing that's ever happened to her.

Orlando in January is definitely warmer than what Rey is accustomed to. She and Ben are able to wear short sleeves and shorts everyday and Rey only makes fun of Ben a little bit for his startlingly white legs. He only makes fun of her a little bit for forgetting to shave her legs or bring a razor when her own legs are on display.

She can tell the crowds bother him at times. Everywhere they go, people are shoulder to shoulder. Every time someone brushes against Ben, he stiffens, the line of his mouth flattens, and he looks like he's half a second away from throttling whoever touched him. She uses her old tricks from when they first started seeing one another, calming him with her touch. It works for the most part.

More than once, when he stiffens and she can practically feel his vibrating with tension, he mutters an apology. "Sorry, sweetheart. It's just...crowds," he shrugs, looks a little embarrassed. But Rey is always quick to assure him that his anxiety doesn't bother her and it's nothing for him to be ashamed of.

Rey did have her doubts about whether or not Ben would actually enjoy the rides, especially since he got so sick on the bus to their hotel that he had to buy Dramamine - but as it turns out, as long as Ben takes his nausea medicine, he's game for pretty much anything, including the rides Rey secretly finds daunting, like Everest and Tower of Terror.

As much as Ben seems to enjoy the more thrilling rides, his favorite part of Disney turns out to be the food. While Rey is normally more enthusiastic about food than Ben, it's clear that he quite enjoys the turkey legs, as well as the restaurants inside Epcot that offer foods from different countries. He even indulges in a Mickey Mouse ice cream bar, despite his claims that he isn't fond of sweets.

Rey, of course, loves Magic Kingdom, specifically Tomorrowland. She makes Ben wait in line for two hours the second time they ride Space Mountain, having used a Fast Pass the first time. Ben takes a peculiar amount of joy in shooting the aliens in the Buzz Lightyear ride and it occurs to Rey that maybe both of them grew up a little too fast.

It's obviously the best vacation Rey has ever been on, but it seems like Ben feels the same way. Despite his discomfort with the crowds, Rey has never seen him so relaxed, never seen him smile so much. He even buys her a pair of Minnie Mouse ears, complete with the polka-dot bow, and refrains from giving her hell about wearing them the whole time.

On their last night, they're standing amidst a crowd in Magic Kingdom as the fireworks blast overhead. Rey catches him watching the flares of colorful shapes with something like awe. As a mouse head flashes in the sky, Ben's dark hair turns almost blue in its light, his eyes taking on an almost golden hue.

You're beautiful, Rey thinks to herself fondly.

But there's something else there too, something that makes her chest feel tight when she looks at him, something that threatens to steal her breath. And deep down, she knows what it is. There have been hints at the feeling before this moment, so it's not shocking by any means. But this time, the words start to form in her mind as she takes his hand. He squeezes back in acknowledgment and Rey quickly looks away, seeking a distraction to stop the complete thought from forming.

She can't deal with it right now because it's too soon. She doesn't want to latch onto the feeling when she knows Ben doesn't feel the same yet. But there's no denying to herself what it is.

For now, it's her own little secret that will remain unnamed and tucked away for another time.

Ben almost doesn't answer the call. He's elbows-deep in work since he took a week off to go to Disney with Rey, and she's really the only person he cares to talk to right now. When he takes a second to check his phone and sees that it isn't her nor anyone else he knows, he almost ignores the call altogether. He has a habit of sending unfamiliar numbers straight to voice-mail. He doesn't like talking on the phone anyway, especially to someone he doesn't know. The only reason he relents is because it's a Coruscant area code.

"Solo?" He answers it, announcing his name more like it's a question.

"Oh, I'm so glad I got you!" The feminine voice is vaguely familiar. "It's been awhile!"

Ben is silent for long enough that there's nervous laughter on the other end. Finally, he says, "May I ask who's calling?"

"Right, um, Bazine Netal? We were…"

"Right, Bazine," Ben remembers her, though he's perplexed as to why she's calling. "Uh, what can I do for you?"

"Oh, of course, I just wanted to get ahold of you to get your current contact information. Professor Kenobi is retiring and some of the graduates still in Coruscant are throwing him a retirement party. Figured you'd want to come."

"Finally retiring, huh?" Ben almost can't imagine it. Though his old law professor is practically ancient, the man still taught with such enthusiasm and with such a sharp mind that it's hard for Ben to picture him not doing that anymore.

"He is! End of an era...anyway, so can I get your address so I can send you a formal invitation?"

Ben rattles off his address to her and in turn she gives him some general information - Kenobi doesn't want any retirement gifts, Ben's allowed to bring a date, and the planned date for the party is in less than a month.

"So I know the plans aren't solid yet but I'm trying to get a tentative headcount - do you think you'll attend?"

And the thing is, even if Ben hadn't attended Professor Kenobi's classes, he can't exactly say no. As much as he hates parties, or any social function for that matter, he can't just skip out on a retirement party for his namesake.

"Yeah, I'll be there," he tells Bazine quietly.

"Great! Just you?"

"No, I have a plus one," he tells her, already knowing that he'll be much more comfortable with Rey by his side.

"Ah, okay," Bazine says, maybe a touch too casually. Then, after a beat, "That's a shame, you know. I was going to ask if you wanted to go with me," she giggles as though it's a joke, so Ben takes it that way.

He thanks her for the information and tells her he'll be looking for the invitation in the mail. Afterward, he ignores the work in front of him for another few minutes in favor of calling Rey.

"Hey, babe," she answers the phone, and he can hear the smile in her voice.

God, this woman…

"Hey, sweetheart," he greets her, suddenly ready to leave work and go see her right now, despite the fact that both of them have about three hours left in the workday. "Just wanted to let you know you need to find a dress if you don't already have one."

"A dress? I have dresses, Ben, you've seen me…"

"Not business dresses," he cuts in. "Something semi-formal."

She doesn't speak for a moment and he can practically hear the gears turning in her head. "Semi-formal? Someone getting married?"

Ben automatically flinches at the word married coming from Rey's mouth and quickly shakes off his reaction. "No, no, nothing like that. I wouldn't put you through that kind of torture…"

"What, why? I love weddings! The food is always good, for the most part…" She trails off, apparently realizing that she's going off on a tangent. "Anyway, if not a wedding, then what?"

"One of my old law professors is retiring and it's one of those things I can't really miss. Also, it's in Coruscant, so it will be an overnight trip." It occurs to Ben that he hasn't actually asked her to go with him. Maybe she has no interest in it. But the thought of socializing with his old classmates and colleagues from his days clerking at Snoke's firm seems almost unbearable.

"I've never been to Coruscant," she tells him, "Might be fun."

Ben's not sure he would call it fun, but his raising by Leia Organa dictates that he show up to these types of things. "It's a date then?" He's stricken a bit guilty by more or less forcing her to do this. He wonders if she feels like he's twisting her arm by basically demanding that she go with him. So even though he would rather stab himself in the eye than go by himself, he decides to give her an out at the last minute. "You don't have to go," he tells her quickly. "It won't be much fun, it's just I kind of have to go, but I don't want you to think…"

"Ben!" She raises her voice, interrupting his babbling, so he promptly shuts up. "You don't even have to ask, silly man. I'll go wherever you go."

And it's silly, honestly, how much those few words mean to him. He knows that she's just talking about this ridiculous party he feels obligated to attend, but part of him pretends that she means it for real. She'll go where he goes.

And he'll never have to be without her.