Chapter 12: I love you to the Moon and Back

I remember your bare feet down the hallway

I remember your little laugh.

Race cars on the kitchen floor, plastic dinousours.

I love you to the Moon and Back.

Ronan. Taylor Swift. [2012]

Rung Three sucked.

Maybe it would suck less if she wasn't hung-over and hurting all over.

"Gracie, come on. You can be quicker, I know it."

And maybe it would suck less, if her cleaning partner wasn't a six-year-old.

There were 13 Lost Boys on Rung One, Two and Three. As one of the oldest and highest in Rung, Harley had chosen Gracie as a partner and had declared she would not be cleaning the toilettes. She was halfway through scrubbing the floors in the girls's shower when the thought of putting one of the girls in danger deliberately and then 'saving' them first occurred to her.

But she probably wouldn't be able to do it if she were absolutely honest.

Gracie was happily cleaning out the clogged up outlet in the floors. Hair and dirt was piling up beside her and the stench made Harley's already upset stomach turn.

"Will you be my partner in fightin' today?" She asked as she continued cleaning the drain and the black stains made Harley shudder.

"We're different in size." She muttered. "That might be difficult."

And also Harley didn't need training. It had been her idea, she was the one who was supposed to be teaching the girls.

She didn't want to hurt Gracie's though and continued scrubbing the floor. Despite being hung-over, annoyed and wet and full of dirt, Harley felt an overflowing affection towards Gracie. The kind of love that made her believe it could withstand anything.

The kind of love she had had for Mistah J.

Sighing she scrubbed the tiles harder.

"Gracie." A voice she'd never heard before said suddenly. "Good to see you, love. Would you leave me alone with Harley?"

Gracie stood up, smiled and vanished from the showers without another word.

Harley turned around. The woman standing before her was tall, with flaming curly red hair. Her eyes a blazing blue. She wore a Gotham Police Department that fit her perfectly, showing off her best assets.

"Hi." She said with a warm smile. "I'm Valerie. Jodie's sister."

She was everything Jodie was not. Slim, red-headed and a warm smile.

"Harley Quinn." Saying her name outloud like that in baggy pants, her hair a complete mess, full of dust and sweaty made her cringe. She definitively didn't feel like Harley Quinn in that moment.

"I know." She grinned.

"What are you doing here?"

"I'm here to train the girls." She said.

"No I mean here, with me." Harley held on to the mop harder as if it could give her stability. She didn't like anyone in a uniform. The police made her uneasy.

Valerie laughed and the sound reminded Harley of peaceful childhood moments she had long forgotten. Of running after butterflies in high grass. Her grandmother scooping her up in her arms.

"I'm not here to arrest you or anything, don't worry." Valerie chuckled and took the mop from Harley. "Do you know the trick with the second shower yet?"

"The what?"

Grinning Valerie stepped towards the second shower on the right. "If this one is the only one being used the water pressure is like ten times as high." She turned it on jumped out of the way. The water hit the tiles with a loud sound and all the dirt Harley had been scrubbing off vanished instantly.

Harley looked up. "Wow, thanks."

"Sure." Valerie switched it off and used the mop to push the rest of the dirty water into the outlet. "Will you help me train the girls? Wendy said you have experience."

"I do." Harley admitted and wanted to reach for the mop, after all this was her task, but Valeria was already finished.

"But I'm on Rung Three now, because..."

"Because you got into trouble?" Valeria gave her a knowing smile. "I heard. Nice touch, crashing it into the bridal store."

"Thanks."

Before Harley could stop her, Valeria used the mop to scoop up all the grime and hair Gracie had plucked from the outlet and discarded it in the bucket.

"You don't have to do that."

"I know, it's just that old habits die hard." She grinned at Harley. "Besides, we Rung Three sisters have to stick together, right?"

"You were on Rung Three?" Harley rolled her eyes. "For what? A week?"

"Two Years." She reached up to twist the third shower head. "This one is always a bit wonky, if you don't push it back the water always sprays in the wrong direction."

"Two Years?!"

Valeria laughed again and Harley's heart gave a small flatter.

"Yeah, I was 18 when I first arrived and I was the brattiest brat that ever lived." She grinned and Harley returned the grin, remembering herself as being a brat as well. "I was always getting in trouble and then finally after two years I realized I had something good here."

"But why didn't you go up the ladder?"

Valeria shrugged. "I knew the kids on Rung Three better than anyone else. They were my charges."

"And Jodie? She arrived with you?"

A dark shadow appeared in Valeria's blazing eyes. "She came later. She didn't..." The look in her eyes became distant, as if she were seeing something that was far away in the past, something that was no longer here. "She didn't make it out as quickly as I did."

The therapist part of Harley wanted to ask what that was about. But she knew better than to ask someone to talk about traumatic experiences before they were ready.

"And then you joined the police force?" It was difficult to keep the disgust out of her voice. Harley hated the cops. She always had.

Valeria laughed at her obvious hatred. "Yeah, but I'm loyal towards the Lost Boys, I always will be."

A wave of jealousy hit Harley so hard she momentarily felt like she couldn't breathe. Valerie had it all, the place she belonged to and a reputation in the real world, a real name, a real job.

"Do you know what the best part of the shower duty is?" The tall woman asked with a grin.

"No." Harley didn't understand her enthusiasm.

"You get to go first in the freshly cleaned shower."

Valeria was like a whirlwind.

She was everywhere at the same time, she knew every Lost Boy by name and everyone listened to what she said.

The girls were happy to see her and eager to show her how mature they were, which meant they weren't getting into fights or crying or pushing each others.

The best part was that she made Jodie smile. Really and genuinely. Obviously they had a bond far more special than anyone else in Neverland.

Harley didn't want her to ever leave again.

All the girls were being trained, not just the three Harley was looking out for. They were put into pairs with girls their own age, height and body type.

Valeria had paired Jodie and Harley to demonstrate and Harley thought Jodie was putting a bit too much effort into her punches, but as she blocked all of them she didn't really mind.

Harleeeeeey, always be prepared! Ya need to be fiercer. Everything can be a weapon, baby, be creative!

Mistah J had sneaked up on on her in the middle of the night, he'd hidden in closets, under the bed, in the bathroom, he'd tried to catch her off guard whenever he could, training her to always be aware of an enemy, always be ready to fight back.

"Ok, girls, now remember to do this task slowly at first. The point is to not hurt your partner." Valeria glared at her sister, obviously having noticed the effort as well.

Harley had to stifle a giggle.

If it helped Jodie to beat the crap out of her, she might as well just do it.

The three women walked among the rows of teenage girls and children, helping out where they could, straightening their postures, showing them how to make a fist, how to stand with the most advantage.

Lauren and Rachel were among the best which made Harley surprisingly proud. She saw Jodie smile when she watched them, but as as soon as she noticed Harley had seen her she glared at her and walked off.

Gracie was the only one without a partner. She was pummeling an old broken punching bag with her tiny fists, out of breath, her hair sticking to her forehead.

Harley chuckled. "Honey, slow down. You need to learn the technique first. You're too close to the bag and you need to spread your legs a little more. Like this." She touched Gracie's shoulders gently, the way she had done numerous times with the other girls.

The little girl with the broken fairy wings flinched as if Harley had hurt her.

Then she started screaming.

She screamed and screamed as if she were in pain, her small face turned red, her eyes filled with tears and Harley backed away.

"I'm sorry!"

The sounds around them ceased, the sounds of training, the chatter and the occasional giggles. Save the incessant screaming the hall was completely void of sounds.

"Gracie!" Valerie materialized beside Harley. "Gracie, you're ok. Everything is fine."

But Gracie didn't look like everything was fine. She was backed up against a wall, her tiny chest rising and falling in such a speed it looked dangerous. Her blue eyes were large and glassy, unblinking.

"It's ok." Valerie repeated. "Remember your happy place?"

The police woman crossed her arms in front of her face and Harley held her breath and she watched Gracie do the same.

"Good. Now close your eyes and go to your happy place. Remember how to do that?"

Gracie squeezed her eyes together, resting her head against her arms.

Valeria started counting to ten very slowly, encouraging Gracie to retreat to her own safe space and Harley watched in shock and awe how the small girl's breathing normalized again.

"Good girl." Valerie continued to coach. "I'm going to leave you alone now and you'll come and see me when you're ready, ok?"

Gracie kept her face hidden on her arms and Valerie beckoned to Harley to follow her.

"She doesn't like to be touched." She whispered to Harley.

"I didn't know. I'm sorry."

"It's ok. Someone should have told you." Valerie looked towards her sister who was watching Lauren block on of Rachel's punches.

"Is she going to be ok?"

"Yeah." Valerie touched Harley's shoulder. "Don't worry, she's fine. It's important to get her to focus on something else so her breathing can normalize as long as she's breathing normally she's fine, she'll just need some time."

Valerie was already looking towards two girls who needed help, but Harley wasn't ready to continue as if nothing had happened.

"She talks to me. Gracie I mean. She never talks, but she talks to me."

"I know." Valerie smiled. "That's good, but she won't let anyone touch her ever. Don't take it personally" She touched Harley's arm and then went back to the others.

Harley looked towards Gracie, her heart felt as if it was bleeding, she wanted to reassure her that she was safe that Harley would sooner die than let anyone ever hurt her.

But when she looked back the girl with the broken fairy wings was gone. All that was left was the grey battered punching bag, swaying gently back and forth.

Valerie was the center of attention during dinner.

Everyone was listening to her stories, everyone wanted to tell her something or show her something and as Harley looked at the scene before her she didn't feel jealous any longer.

"Long day?"

Wendy sat down in front of her.

As usual she had a mug of tea in her hands.

"Yeah." Harley tore her gaze away from Valerie and looked at the older woman. "Did you hear about what happened to Gracie?"

"I'm sorry you had to experience that." Wendy said with a sad look in her eyes. "I honestly thought you knew."

"I should have guessed it." Harley muttered.

"No one could have guessed it, Harley. It happened to me once too, believe me I know how bad you feel, but she'll be fine. I promise."

Harley nodded, but she felt tears burning in her eyes. And she couldn't cry here, not in front of everyone who was obviously having a good time.

"I'm sorry, Wendy, I need to–"

She didn't even bother finishing the sentence and hurried out of the dining hall. The Lost Boys were traumatized, abandoned and abused children. She shouldn't have been so surprised. But the thought of someone hurting Gracie tore at her heart in a way she couldn't comprehend. The fact that she had hurt her, had put her in an emotional state like that made her want to throw up.

Outside of Neverland she took deep, steadying breaths. The air smelled like rain and felt static, as if there was a storm coming. Harley looked up at the dark sky, she'd welcome a storm tonight.

"Sometimes we feel a love so strong it's like it might kill us. It's so fierce it might just tear us apart." Wendy's voice was gentle behind her and Harley closed her eyes with a smile. Of course Wendy would follow her. "You love Gracie in a way that is painful. That's a good thing, Harley."

"I could leave." She didn't turn around, staring into the night ahead of her. "I could just leave now and never return."

Wendy stood beside her and also stared straight ahead.

"Could you?" She asked and even if Harley couldn't see it, she knew Wendy was smiling her knowing smile. "Could you leave Gracie behind? Me and Peter?"

"It's too much." Tears burned in her eyes again. "I can't love her this much."

"Yes you can."

"She's been through hell, she must have been and now..."

"And now she is living her best life, Harley." Wendy finally turned to her. "And you are part of that. I know this shocked you today, it was shocking, but you can't see the difference you've made in Gracie's life. In hers and Lauren's and Rachel's, even Jodie's and..." Her voice quivered in a very untypical way and when she spoke again it was in a hushed voice. "And mine. I can't imagine living without you Harley Quinn."

Flushed Harley wiped underneath her eyes. "Shit, don't tell anyone I have all these feelings, ok?"

Wendy laughed loudly and Harley knew it was ok. She didn't have to say anything more, didn't have to reassure Wendy that she loved her too, that she couldn't leave. That she was tied to Neverland and the Lost Boys and the girl with broken fairy wings in a way she could neither explain nor control.

The two stood in the darkness, enjoying the feeling of the coming storm, the static air, the smell of rain. They stood together as one unit in comfortable silence, when the stillness of the night was interrupted by a signature drawling, creepy laugh.

"What do we have here?" A voice called out.

It was a voice she hated and loved at the same time. One she feared and one she longed for. It was the voice of the man who had made her who she was today.

The Joker had arrived in Neverland.

What do you think of this cliffhanger? :)