The Way I Wish Things Had Gone

Sasuke leaves to avenge his family, but things go a little differently…

Chapter #1 – the Day Sasuke Leaves

"I am not you're enemy"

Sasuke

It's a balmy summer night. The moon is out, there are few clouds to block it's light from pouring down onto the sidewalk. Sasuke walks casually, slow even, as he leaves Sakura's apartment. She wasn't there, but that is probably for the best. He has thought this through and his mind is made. His brother left him, and only him, to finish the job. Avenge his family. Family must always come first, his dad drilled into him, and truly what purpose is left for him now but to finally make his father proud?

To do this task ahead of him, he cannot allow his heart to make him weak. Orochimaru is the most direct route to strength, and it isn't just strength he needs. He knows the gap that exists between his brother and himself is vast. Itachi is a ninja of his own breed, even Sasuke can recognize that, and THAT is who he must defeat. He must stay focused. Eyes ahead. Left foot, right foot. There are the Konoha gates. He can leave. He can do this. Almost there.

His most precious memories of team 7 resurface as he walks, with nothing but his thoughts to distract him from the sound of his footsteps,

"Who knows my body moved on it's own." He said, as he protects Naruto from what surely would have been a death blow dealt by Haku on the bridge in the Land of Waves.

And another,

"I lost everything once. I don't want to see my precious comrades die in front of me anymore..." He says to Naruto in the forest of death.

"..No matter what save Sakura."

How could he tell them? That when Orochimaru bit him, the mark he cursed him with tethered him to that foul ninja. That that mark will eat at him, until there is nothing of himself left. That's what the Sound kunoichi said. Would he remember Naruto in that state? Or Sakura? Would he hurt them? Would Kakashi be able to stop him? And yet, the power he felt, when the mark spread… it was… enticing. The kunoichi said that was only the first stage, and he was already hungry for more. That power could be the edge he needs to take down Itachi, and Itachi made it clear no one in Konaha was safe. So long as he lived, Itachi would come for him. So Sasuke must leave, to keep his comrades safe. To avenge his family. It was that simple, he told himself.

Yet he thought of Naruto fondly, and his dumb ninja way. Kakashi and his purvey books. Sakura… he couldn't go there. Not now.

But, there she was. He sees her pink bob come around the tree at the corner up ahead. Her normally light hair appearing dark and her porcelain skin glowing white under the light of the moon making her appear fragile.

She is fragile, he thinks. All the more reason he shouldn't stop walking.

"Why are you hanging around in a place like this in the middle of the night?" he says, nonchalantly, like she might not notice the bag over his shoulder.

"One has to pass down this road to leave the village." Sakura says softly, dipping her chin to look at the ground. Her new short hair falls to cover some of her face, but he knows what expression she is making now. He knows her as well as he knows himself. Despair, he thinks. She'll probably start to cry soon. He feels a pang of regret at the thought. For months he had looked out for her, grown to care for her even, as Team 7 grew together.

Sakura knows where he is headed tonight, and she knows she can't physically stop him. Could never bring herself to try if this is truly what he wants.

"Go home and sleep," he responds. Without breaking his stride he walks around her. He wishes she would just listen to him like every other time he's told her to do something. To trust him to keep her safe, like she always had. She wouldn't understand why he has to leave, and worse, she might be the only person who could talk him into staying.

"You won't tell me a single thing." She accuses him. He can hear the tears as her voice wavers.

"Why would I have to tell you anything?" He shouldn't stop walking. Shouldn't look at her. He can't lose sight of his obligation, even if he has to be harsh.

"I'm telling you to keep your nose out of my business."

Because God forbid Itachi comes after her. Or Orochimaru. There is too much at stake here, cutting ties is for the best. He hasn't thought too far ahead, but he knows there's a good chance he might not return. Itachi won't go down easy. Not to mention that before he can take on Itachi, he has to take on Orochimaru. The Snake Sannin. One of the Three LEGENDARY Sannin. Sasuke will never allow that man inside his body. If it comes down to it, he will rip his own eyes from their sockets before he becomes Orochimaru's host, for without them his body is worthless to the Snake Sanin.

"Stop bothering me over everything I do."

"I… make you dislike sometimes, don't I? Do you remember? We had just became Genin and the 3-man squads were assigned… You and I were alone here at this very spot. You got mad at me for being a real brat. I never apologized for that by the way. How insensitive I was to you that day. Making assumptions about your family in that way."

"I don't remember that." He lies, knowing exactly the affect it will have. He wasn't always a good liar, he thinks to himself. Wondering when that happened. When it became necessary.

"I know about your family Sasuke."

Ah, she changes tactics. She was always the most intelligent member on Team 7.

"But revenge… That won't bring anyone happiness. Neither you, nor I. "

"I'm different from all of you." He speaks harshly. " I think I might've suspected so all along… but I'm walking a road that is incompatible with the rest of you. We worked well together, and it's true for a time that I thought this was my path too. But in the end I decided on obligation. On getting revenge for what was done to my family. On getting revenge on Itachi. That's been my reason for living. I can't become like you or Naruto."

"Are you going to isolate yourself again, Sasuke-kun?" Sakura lifts her face to him once again, crying quietly. "It was you that taught me how rough isolation is, Sasuke. And now I know exactly how that feels, because how I would feel if you were no longer here… for me that would be the same as solitude!" Now the tears are pouring down her face, but he is surprised to hear her voice is strong.

"From here on out, our paths go separate ways." Sasuke turns to go, ignoring her completely.

"I.. I love you very much Sasuke!" Sakura cries out, realizing this is her last chance. May be her last chance ever, "if you would only stay with me, you would not regret it. I will make sure you find happiness! I'd do anything for you Sasuke. So I'm begging you, please stay here! I'll help you with your revenge. I'll make it happen somehow, I promise you!

"So, please," she begs, "stay here with me."

He is no fool. He has known her feelings for years now. Up until Team 7 was formed he never cared much at all, even found her to be irately annoying at times, but now… the words hurt him as much as they comforted him. Because while he may feel for her, he cannot have her, cannot say those words back.

His silence all the answer she needs. A cloud passes the moon, casting her face in shadow, "then take me with you."

Oh no. No, no no no. Gods no. This cannot happen. The thought of her, near Itachi, near Orochimaru. He feels adrenaline shoot through him, his muscles tense, his face twists in anger. But then it is gone, he smothers the emotion and his face becomes a blank palette once again as he turns to face her.

"You really are annoying," he smirks. He knows those words had the impact he wanted when he sees her face, and immediately regrets looking. But at least she will be safe.

"Don't go! If you go I'll scream… and…" Even as she makes the threat she knows she would never follow through. Sasuke flickers from her sight, and not a moment later she can feel his breath on the back of her neck. Body flicker technique.

"Sakura…. Thank you." He says to her, with every intention of it being the last words he exchanges here tonight. He reaches for the pressure point on her neck that will knock her unconscious when he hears someone approach.

"I guess I'm not the only one who can't sleep tonight." A new voice drawls. Then Shikamaru comes around the same tree Sakura walked around, coming into view.

"Shikamaru?" Sakura gasps, she cranes her neck to face to the side so Sasuke can better hear, "I didn't tell anyone I was coming here tonight."

"OI" Orange and yellow fly past their vision as Naruto drops in front of Sasuke. Making a clear attempt to block his path but ironically not yet realizing Sasukes intentions to leave the village. "BAKA WERE YOU ON A DATE WITH SAKURA? Hey, wait. DID YOU MAKE SAKURA CRY!?"

"You don't need to leave the village Sasuke." Shikamaru says rather directly, ignoring the orange imp flailing his arms up and down at the thought that his friend had upset his crush, and then in anger as he sees Sasuke's bag and confirms Shikamaru's accusal. "The very Sannin you are abandoning us for was raised right here in this village. Like you. You don't need him."

"Why the hell do you care?" Sasuke growls, not happy for the interruptions.

"Sasuke, you are neither a close friend, nor someone I particularly like. But if you leave this village we will risk our lives to bring you back. That's just the Leaf way." Shikamaru shrugs.

"Hey Sasuke." Naruto shouts, getting serious. "If you leave, I will never stop coming after you. No matter what it takes. You are my best friend and one way or another, I will help you get your revenge. Even if it's just as someone to measure yourself against, to make sure that you can keep up with us Konoha Ninja while you train with the creepy snake-sannin." His voice drops to a whisper as if the Sannin may be listening in, and he visibly cringes.

"Because," he shakes his disgust off and smiles broadly, "If you can't kick my ass you don't stand a chance against that Itachi bastard!" He sticks his hand out in a thumbs up.

"I have to do this." Sasuke looks at the ground. All the fight suddenly draining from him. "I told you I wouldn't lose my comrades again. I intend to keep that promise. I am the only one who can bring down Itachi. I… hope… to come back after I complete that goal."

"But you would stand a way better chance with all of us at your back!" Naruto complains.

"This is my burden. He's my brother. This is something I have to do alone. Only the Sharingan can match the Sharingan."

Sakura spins on her heel, and wraps her arms around him, burying her tear streaked face in his shirt. He is surprised by the strength she uses as she embraces him. "What did you mean, thank you? Sasuke? I need to know, before you leave." She looks up at him, soft green eyes glossy with tears. But he can see the light there, the spark he had only just defeated moments ago. She knows there is more behind his intentions. Fuck it all now.

He looks to his friends.

"Let me go."

Shikamaru leans his head back and looks at the moon, moving the tooth pick from one side of his lips to the other. He sighs. "Don't suppose we could stop you if we tried."

Sasuke nods and looks to Naruto.

Naruto scrunches his brow, deep in thought for a moment. Scratching his head, "Ehhhhhhh, y'know. I think I'm pretty tired tonight. But tomorrow? Definitely." He nods forcefully. "I'll be coming after your ass tomorrow Teme so you better be ready for the fight of your life! Dattebayo!"

Finally, Sasuke looks down at the messy pink hair, hair that she obviously doesn't know how to tame after having such a long style for so long. He meets her eyes, and his eyes soften. Just slightly, but she sees it. He leans down closer, so what he says may be for her and only her. "Sakura. Thank you…"

"…Wait for me."

Then with a flicker he's gone. And they are standing on an empty street once more.

The hour was late enough that even the straggling drunks from the late night bars had found their way home to rest. The trio walked quietly, but not defeated, weaving their way home through the empty streets of Konoha. Shikamaru hands in pockets, Naruto with hands behind his head, and Sakura with her hands clasped loosely in front of her. All deep in thought, comfortable in their silence.

"Thanks for walking me home guys," Sakura said softly as they approach her apartment. "Y'know, I don't think I'm ready to be alone just yet. Would you like to come in for a cup of tea?"

"HUH. Oh, yeah. Totally Sakura-chan!" Naruto nods happily.

Shikamaru shrugs, and with that they head up the breezy outdoor steps to 3A.

Drowsy, Sakura fumbles with the lights as she heads to the kitchen and pops the kettle on the stove. "Grab some blankets and head to the balcony, Naruto, Shikamaru! I'll be right out."

"Hello, my sweet girl," Sakura reaches her hand down for the fluffy grey cat to push up against as she walks down the hall to her bedroom.

Kicking the door shut, or as shut as the doors here would close in this old building, she peeled off her clothes from the day. Working in just the moonlight and from memory she navigated her room mostly blind (if she was being honest with herself), pulling on a hoodie and sitting down on her bed to yank on loose sweat pants. She reached over to set her alarm for the mission she knew would be assigned the next morning, and in doing so heard something crinkle under her side…

"I am not you're enemy"

Sasuke

She smiled, tears starting to fall once again. "Guys! Oi, Naruto, Shikamaru!" She yelled, already on her feet and heading out her door to the living room in her impatience to share this little piece of heart warming news with them. Knowing it would lift their hopes as it had hers when she read it. Their friend was not lost to them. And they would never give up on him.

A/N.

Hi there, this idea has been burning in my mind for a few weeks now and I need to get it out. This is my first fan fic, please be kind! And let me know if you did enjoy it :)

I tried to stay as true to the beginning of this scene as I could – but obviously added my inside view to their thoughts and motivations. Changed up some of their lines that I did use from the episode to flow more etc etc. Took out parts I didn't think flowed well with the POV I'm writing from.

Rated M for language, and perhaps more mature content as they grow up. Who knows.

This story is going to be a slow burn. First chapters are setting things up for later

A/N 2

Everyone is welcome to their own thoughts and opinions when they review - and let me say, I DO LOVE REVIEWS - but if you are looking for a fic that caters to fan service/comments/requests, or a fic where Sakuras virginity (or lack thereof) is a big deal, or a big part of the plot... this may not be the fic for you.