A/N: I wanted to try to get something out before the holiday. Hope you like it.
They were going through another dry spell. Deacon and Rayna had only a handful of scenes together, now that Rayna was planning to marry Luke. The few times they interacted on screen were barely snippets of scenes. At least one of them was just that they were in the vicinity of each other with no interaction at all. It was frustrating. Not only were they filming on separate days, but, as always, shooting schedules ran long and late. Much of his free time was taken with his kids. Weekend time was almost nonexistent.
She was lonely. While they talked regularly, they only saw each other what felt like sporadically. She'd let Daniel take her out to dinner several times as his visits to Nashville became more regular. It didn't make up for not seeing Chip, but at least she wasn't just sitting at home.
It was late September and it had been a week since she'd seen him. They had no scenes together yet again and it felt like they were ships passing in the night. It was a Friday and she knew he was shooting. If they were working late, it meant he didn't have plans with his kids. She picked up her phone and decided to take a chance. I miss you. Any chance you can stop by tonight? Then she put the phone down and got up from the couch. She forced herself into busy work to keep from hovering over the phone, waiting for a response.
After she had gotten Yoby down for the night, she checked her phone. Still shooting. Will make time though. She refrained from asking when, since she knew he wouldn't know. She also knew it had been as frustrating for him as it was for her.
The buzz of the phone woke her up. She realized she must have fallen asleep at some point. The TV was still on with the sound turned down and the lamp next to the couch was on. She grabbed her phone. "Hey," she said.
"Did I wake you up?"
"Yes, actually. Although I guess I just dozed off on the couch."
"I'm sorry it's so late." She glanced at the time and saw that it was 11:30. "Is the offer to stop by still good?"
"Yes, of course."
"Okay. I'll be there in about a half hour."
She got up and went to her bedroom to freshen up and brush her hair. She smiled at her reflection in the mirror. She was really looking forward to seeing him.
She was breathing hard. She put her hand on her chest and felt her heart beating fast. They hadn't bothered to sit and chit chat, just headed straight for her bedroom. She could hear him breathing in and out and she turned her head to look at him. "I'm so glad to see you," she said.
He turned on his side and put his arm around her waist. "Me too." He sighed. "It feels like our schedules never cooperate anymore."
"I know. We may have to be more intentional."
"I think we have to be more intentional."
She turned on her side to face him, reaching out to smooth his hair back, then letting her index finger drift down over his cheek. She wanted to ask so many questions. How long were they going to have to live like this? What was the timeline for actually filing for divorce? How long was it going to take? How long before they could stop hiding? But she didn't ask any of those questions. He always let her know how things were going and she didn't want to seem too needy. When he'd moved completely out of the house, she'd thought things would loosen up for them, but between conflicting shooting schedules and him trying to continue to be a presence in his kids' lives, it hadn't gone that way. "We'll figure that out." She wanted to ask him how long he could stay but she was afraid he'd tell her he needed to leave then.
"I begged off any activities for tomorrow, so I hope it's okay if I hang out with you and Yoby," he said, a quick smile crossing his face. It was like he read her mind.
She smiled back at him. "It's more than okay." He pulled her closer, so that their bodies were touching. He kissed her, a long, slow kiss. He put a hand under her breast, letting his fingers graze her skin, gently caressing her. When he pulled his lips away from hers, he gazed into her eyes for a moment. She breathed in as his fingers still stroked her. Then he leaned down and put his mouth on her breast. She moaned a little as he started with gentle licks, then moved on to sucking on her nipple. His hand drifted down her side and then he flattened his hand against the small of her back as he continued his attention to her breast.
When his teeth gently grazed her, she breathed out. She felt his erection against her stomach and all she could think about was getting him inside her. But he kept on with what he was doing and she thought he had to know how it was affecting her. Finally he pulled his mouth away and looked deep in her eyes. She was already panting. He rolled her onto her back and then nudged her legs apart with his knee. He hovered over her, then slid his hands under her ass and lifted her up, plunging inside her at the same time.
He was in control and she just grabbed the sheet in her fists as he moved inside her, first faster, then slower, then faster again. She could feel herself starting to spiral out of control and she lifted her hips as much as she could. Suddenly she saw stars and it felt like fireworks going off inside of her. He kept driving into her and finally he stiffened and then let go. After a moment, he lowered her to the bed and then sprawled on top of her, his cheek against her shoulder. She put her arms around him, holding him close, until he finally raised his head and found her mouth, kissing her hungrily.
When he finally rolled away from her, she tucked into him, her head on his shoulder. She was glad he could stay. They needed this time together. He kissed her on the forehead and she looked up at him. "I love you," he said.
She smiled. "I love you too."
When she woke up the next morning, Chip was still sleeping. She gently disengaged herself. He made a noise and frowned slightly but didn't wake up. She watched him for a few minutes and noticed that the frown didn't completely go away. She looked closer and saw tension in his face that she hadn't noticed before. She knew there was a lot going on for him with his personal situation and wondered how heavily that was weighing on him. She hoped they might be able to talk about it some later on. She decided to let him sleep. He probably needed it. She got up and got dressed, then went to find Yoby.
By the time Chip made an appearance it was almost noon. She was in the kitchen and he smiled as he walked up to her. "You should have gotten me up earlier," he said, giving her a hug and a kiss. She noticed that, in spite of the late hour, he didn't look completely rested. She was used to seeing an upbeat Chip and he just didn't seem 100% there. But she decided to wait to see what the rest of the day brought.
"You must have needed the sleep," she said. "You didn't even wake up when I got up."
"Could be." He cleared his throat. "I cleared the weekend so I could spend it with you."
That surprised her. "You did?"
He pulled her into another embrace. "We don't get to spend enough time together. And I'm off Monday and Tuesday, so I can see the kids then."
She put her hand on his cheek and smiled. "Well, I can't say that I'm not excited to spend the weekend with you. What a treat." She leaned her head on his chest. "I heard the weather's not going to be great this weekend, so I'm looking forward to a cozy couple of days." He put his arms around her shoulders, holding her close.
When he stepped back he smiled and she saw some of the familiar twinkle back in his eyes. "You still got coffee?" he asked.
She grinned. "Of course." She went to the cabinet and got a mug, then poured one for him and refreshed her own. She handed him the coffee and he took a sip, closing his eyes briefly as though he were savoring it.
It had been a low-key day. Even though it was just late September, it had turned a little cloudy and cool and she had turned on the fireplace, which gave the den a cozy feel. They spent a lot of time with Yoby, who was thrilled to have his friend Chip around. She was happy to see that some of the spark was back in Chip's eyes and demeanor. And it was also a nice change to be able to take their time with the day and not feel rushed to take advantage of whatever time they had together. They curled up together on the couch while Yoby was napping and eventually fell asleep as well. She ordered in pizza for dinner and after Yoby went to bed, she poured bourbon for both of them and then settled into the curve of his arm.
"This has been nice," she said.
"Yeah, it has." She detected a wistfulness in his voice and turned to look at him.
"Is everything okay?" she asked. She watched as he seemed to first struggle with his composure and then as tears glazed his eyes. She set her glass down and turned her full attention onto him. "Chip, what's going on?"
He took a minute to set his own glass down and then cleared his throat. "I wish I knew if I was doing the right thing," he said finally.
"What do you mean?" She felt little prickles of anxiety, not sure where this was going.
He looked at her. "You were right when you said we needed to figure out how to do this...kindly. I've tried to be mindful of that and not get impatient to move things along. I want to do what's right for my kids and not hurt them any more than I already have. I'm still not sure they really understand what's going on. I'm not sure Patty understands what's going on. I'm having a hard time explaining because I'm trying so hard not to be hurtful. But it's killing me." The tears started to roll down his cheeks and he brushed them away roughly.
She swallowed. "Do you not want to do this?" she asked, nervous about what his answer would be.
"No, that's not it." He put his hand on the back of her neck, letting his thumb graze her skin. "I still want us to be together. But I'm struggling with how to separate that from what the other issues are. I'm not happy and that's been going on for a while. Looking at life through that lens, it's not where I see my future, with or without you. It doesn't feel healthy, for any of us. And then the realities of what it's doing to my family. The bigger family, not just this smaller one. It's tough. People don't understand and seem to feel like they're owed an explanation, but I don't know what to say." The look on his face then tore her heart in two. He seemed so conflicted and his eyes were glistening with tears again. "Pulling all this apart, all these years, all these memories, it's hard. Harder than I thought it would be." He looked away but she could see the tears on his cheeks again.
She took a deep breath. "Are you rethinking things?"
He turned to look at her and then grabbed her hands. "No. You're who I see in my future and I want that. This is just harder than I thought it would be."
She could feel his pain and she pulled her hands from his and reached for him, pulling him into her arms and just holding him. "I'm so sorry," she whispered.
On Sunday morning when she woke up, he woke up too. Or maybe he was already awake. She couldn't tell. He smiled. "Hey."
She reached out and stroked his cheek. "Hey. Did you sleep okay?"
He made a face and shrugged. "Eh. Could've been better."
She raised her head up and braced it on her hand. "Maybe you need some space." She hated to say it, but she wouldn't stand in the way of him being clearheaded about this.
He frowned, putting his arm over her waist. "No. It's not a matter of not knowing what to do..."
She stopped him. "I know you've got a plan, but you should probably take a step back and make sure it works for everyone. If you need to take a little more time, do that. If you need to rethink your approach, do that."
He shook his head. "I'm not taking a break from you."
She smiled and cupped his cheek for a moment. "I'm not saying you have to do that. Just don't let impatience get the best of you. Now, why don't you just take it easy and I'll go whip up some breakfast for us." She started to get up when he grabbed her hand.
When she looked back at him, he had a mischievous smile and a twinkle in his eyes. "Maybe let me whip up that breakfast."
She laughed. He knew her too well.
When she got her script for the 10th episode of the season, they were close to finishing the previous episode. There were a number of scenes for her and Chip in the current episode, which had been exciting for both of them. She could tell from the script that Rayna and Luke's relationship was not going to last and then Callie confirmed it for her. While she didn't love the idea of breaking off an engagement the morning of a wedding, the fact was that it was better not to go through with it at all, even if it was an 11th hour decision. She felt sure that Rayna and Deacon would finally be together, but the timing was unclear.
What she had not expected was the stunner that Deacon would have cancer. Even if it was just on screen, it knocked the wind out of her. As soon as she saw it, she called Chip. He didn't answer and she thought he was probably filming that day, so she left a message for him to call her. Even if he wasn't able to call, she would see him the next day when they filmed an evening scene on location. Things didn't necessarily end well in the scene but knowing that it was going to turn around meant she didn't feel discouraged by it.
It was about an hour later when he called. "Hey there," she said when she answered.
"Hey. I had a few minutes so I thought I'd call."
"Are you working today?"
"Yeah, kind of. Had a writing appointment today. Actually still in the middle of it, but we were taking a break."
"Oh, that's right. I forgot you were doing that. So, I got the script for the next episode. It's pretty crazy."
"I guess I'll get mine when I get back to the apartment. Anything earthshattering?"
She laughed. "I would say so. Rayna calls off the wedding."
"Really? For Deacon?"
"Mm, I don't know that yet. It happens right at the end of the episode. But Deacon has his own stuff to worry about."
"Such as?"
"Do you want me to tell you? Or do you want to wait?"
"Well, I'm thinking that, if you're not opposed, I could stop by your place when I'm done here."
"I would love that."
"Then why don't you save the Deacon reveal until then?"
"I can do that."
"I need to get back so we can finish up. Don't tell anyone, but this song I'm working on is really about you." He chuckled.
"Well, that just sounds...lovely. And I'll see you when you get here." She smiled as she disconnected.
He got to her house just after dark. When she opened the door, she threw her arms around his neck and kissed him. He let his hands run up and down her back as he kissed her back. When they finally stepped back, he grinned. "Now that was a nice welcome," he said.
"Well, it'll have to do for now. Yoby's still awake so..."
"He is? I haven't seen him in a while."
He stepped around her and headed for the den. She smiled as she heard Yoby yell out Chip's name and then she followed him, laughing.
After Yoby went to bed, they settled into the couch. He had a glass of bourbon, she had a glass of wine. He put one arm around her, pulling her in close. "So what's the stuff Deacon has to deal with?" he asked.
She looked at him. "Cancer. They're giving him advanced liver cancer."
He looked surprised. "Seriously? Why?"
She shrugged. "I don't know. I'm hoping it's not another roadblock kind of situation."
"Does he tell Rayna?"
"Not in this episode, but I don't know."
He sat back a little, looking thoughtful. "I'm not sure what to think about that. Are they killing him off?"
"Surely not. Of course not. Why would they do that? That wouldn't make any sense."
He leaned over and kissed her. "Maybe you need to tell the writers that," he said with a smirk.
"You know I don't have any influence. But I hadn't even considered...that." She leaned forward and set her wine glass down. He took the opportunity to run his hand down her back. When she sat back, he wrapped his arm around her shoulders and pulled her in for another kiss. She sighed. "I'm sure you could ask Callie. Or Dee."
"Well, I can't worry about it tonight." He bit down on his lower lip, as though he were weighing how to say something. Then he sighed. "I'm gonna need to spend a little more time with Addie. She's still sort of struggling with me moving out."
"I think you should. And don't push the rest until you've got that in a good place. I know it must be tough for her."
"I keep thinking about how confusing it was for me and my sister when my parents got divorced. I was younger than Addie, but it's a big change. I can look back on it now, as an adult, and see some of the signs, but they were good at not letting us see that at the time. Plus we were not that savvy to pick up on it." He let out a short laugh. "I just don't want her to feel like I'm abandoning her."
She put her hand on his chest and smiled. "You're a good dad."
He smiled, looking grateful. "I do my best."
"I'm sure they know that. And they'll appreciate everything you did to make this easier for them."
"Hope so." He sighed and set his glass down. "Would you mind if I just went to my place tonight? I'm beat and I know you've got scenes in the morning."
She didn't really want him to leave but it sounded to her like things were pretty emotional for him right then. Maybe it was best. "It's fine." She smiled. "I know I'll see you tomorrow."
He nodded and smiled. "That you will." He kissed her. "How about a raincheck? Tomorrow night?"
"Absolutely." They got up and walked into the foyer. He wrapped his arms around her and kissed her deeply. Then he looked down at her.
"I know things are up and down and I'm sorry about that."
She shook her head. "Don't worry. I understand. I do." She put a hand on his face and let her thumb graze over the scruff on his cheek. "This gives me something to look forward to." She kissed him. "I'll see you tomorrow."
He breathed in, looking deep into her eyes. "I love you," he said.
"I love you." He kissed her again, then opened the door and let himself out. She stood by the sidelight window and watched as he pulled out and then drove down the street. When she could no longer see his taillights, she walked back into the den and picked up the glasses, carrying them to the kitchen. She suddenly felt exhausted herself and decided to head for bed.
When she got to the shooting location for Deacon's house, he was already there. She could see that he looked rested and relaxed, his smile lighting up his face when he saw her. They would rehearse the scene first, then would wait for the right amount of darkness to actually film. It was a scene where the tension increased as the scene progressed and in the end it was kind of a heartbreaking one, when Rayna basically tried to push Deacon away for good. He walked up to her. "Hey," he said. They were always careful when they were together on set or around the set. Always had been. Everyone knew they were good friends and she wanted to keep that impression. She had realized early on that she usually only touched him – a hand on an arm, a gentle swat, or a quick squeeze of hands – when they were laughing and joking. And although they'd had some pretty serious conversations – personal ones – in hallways or out of the way spots, they didn't obviously invade each other's space. It was a little chilly that late afternoon, though, and he'd briefly put his arm around her shoulders. "You look a little chilly," he said.
She smiled and he dropped his arm. "A little. I guess I could have brought a jacket or something." She glanced over at the wardrobe person, who was holding the jacket she would be wearing and laughed. "Actually I guess I did." They were standing a little off to the side while the crew got things set up for the scene. The house was outlined in lights, with a wreath on the door, and the lights of a Christmas tree showing from inside the house. All of that would be taken down, of course, after they'd finished filming, since it was nowhere near Christmas yet. Even with temperatures dropping a little, it didn't feel like Christmas either. She loved filming on location though, always had. They, of course, had a pretty complete set for Deacon's house at the production studio, along with long drapes which had a realistic outdoor look when they were working there. They would do this whole scene outdoors, though, and it called for something more real, hence filming at the real house.
The sun was setting and it wouldn't be long before it was completely dark. He was still smiling. They were far enough away from the others that, if they kept their voices low, they wouldn't be heard. "I went to see my lawyer this morning," he said.
"Really?" She hadn't known that was his plan. "And?"
He put his hands in his pockets and looked around, then back at her. "I'm trying to decide the right timing."
"For?"
"Filing." She raised her eyebrows and then nodded. "I want to do it soon, timing-wise, but it seems like after the holidays would be best. She's taking the kids down to Orlando, to her parents' house, for Christmas."
"That seems like the best plan. Have you talked to her about it yet?"
"Not in those specific terms, but I will. She's expecting it though."
"You sure?"
He smiled. "Yeah, I am."
She breathed in and, even though neither of them said anything more about it, they seemed to have an understanding that they would wait until later to talk more. She looked back over towards the house. "It looks nice, don't you think? Very festive."
He chuckled. "It does. Pretty simple, like Deacon would do." They were called over then to do a first run through. They headed towards the director to talk through how the scene would play out. She hoped they could knock it out quickly once filming began. She was anxious to see him later that evening.
The minute he walked through the door, he'd taken her in his arms and kissed her hungrily. She had responded the same way and instead of catching up, they had quickly made their way to her bedroom. After undressing, they'd gotten under the covers and he leaned over her, sliding his fingers through her hair. He kissed her again and she put her arm around his back, then slid it up to the back of his shoulder, as the kiss became more intoxicating. He rolled her on her back and then entered her swiftly. He pulled his lips from hers for just a moment. "I've been waiting for this all day," he whispered, then captured her mouth again as he began to move inside her.
She put her arms around his neck, arching her back, then dragged her fingers up through his hair. She loved feeling his skin against her own, the scruff on his face tickling her cheek, his hands holding her just above her hips. She matched her own movements to his, big and bold and all-consuming. She could feel herself building to a climax and as soon as the thought went through her mind, she felt herself go over the edge, uncontrollable spasms rippling through her. She tore her lips from his, crying out, and then pressing her mouth against his shoulder. It felt like pieces of herself falling all around her and in the midst of that, she felt him let go as well, gripping her hips, seeming to be gasping as though he were drowning.
He was panting and she was doing the same. She wrapped her arms around him as she held him close. Finally he rose up above her, resting on his elbows, looking down at her. He leaned down and kissed her forehead, then brushed her lips with his. "Do you have any idea how good it feels to be with you?" he asked.
She smiled. "If it's anything like how it feels to be with you, then yes, I do."
He kissed her again, then his eyes grew serious. "It's not all about this."
She understood what he was saying. "I know. It feels good being together like this, though."
He smiled then. "It does." He breathed out. "I feel like I could stay this way forever."
"It might be hard to get anything else done." She laughed then.
He gave her a side-eye, then pressed his lips hard against hers and rolled onto his side. She turned to face him and he pulled the covers up over both of them, then wrapped his arm around her, holding her close. "I keep thinking about being able to be with you all the time. Just holding each other and falling asleep together. I dream about it, really."
She ran her finger down his face. "I'm the same."
His face turned serious again. "I've got everything drawn up. She and I have talked about what it would look like and I think we're in agreement. She'll stay here, at least until Addie goes to college. Are you okay with that?"
She really hadn't thought about it at all, but she wanted him to have that regular connection with his kids. "Yeah. It makes sense." Then she looked at him sharply. "Have you talked about...us?"
He shook his head. "No, no, of course not. I just want to be sure I get to see the kids and she understands that." He sighed. "She's come around a lot on this and I feel like I need to be mindful of it, you know?" She nodded. "That was a pretty big ask, since she didn't know anyone here when she came." He tucked a strand of her hair behind her ear. "I know she thinks I have a thing for you, but nothing more than that. Seeing you with that guy seemed to, you know."
She looked down for a moment, then back at him. "We need to be careful."
"I know." His eyes seemed to dart around her face. "I care about her, so I don't want it to be hurtful. And it's important in terms of continuing to parent the kids." Then he looked deeply into her eyes. "But I love you. I want to be with you. And not just in the shadows."
She nodded. "We will."
He leaned in and kissed her, a long, slow, intimate kiss. Then he sighed. "I can't stay. I've got an early call tomorrow." He kissed her again. "I hate it."
"It's okay. There will be other days."
He smiled. "Yes, there will." He got up then and got dressed. She found a robe and slid into it, wrapping it around her body. Then she walked him out to the door. He took her in his arms and kissed her again. "I love you."
She smiled. "I love you too." She laid a hand on his chest. "I'll see you soon." He kissed her again and then he was gone.
She leaned back against the wall and closed her eyes. It was such a complicated situation and she had such complicated feelings in the midst of it all. She loved him though, more than she had thought it was possible to love someone else. In spite of all of it, he was her future. She felt it in her bones, in her soul. He was who she was meant to be with and it felt like such a twist of fate that a TV show in a city to which neither of them had ever been had sparked that flame. It was as though the universe caused the person they'd originally thought would play Deacon to suddenly have a conflict that left it available to the one person she needed to cross paths with. That one right person.
Chip came over the night before they were filming the scene where Rayna went to see Deacon after calling off the wedding. They rehearsed it themselves, trying different facial expressions, voice intonations, talking through mechanics and motivations. He even threw her off once – not an unusual occurrence – by telling her he didn't understand why she needed any time, that he was dying and didn't have that kind of time. After laughing until tears ran down her face, they went through it again.
"Why do you think she wants time?" he asked.
"She'd just made such a public commitment to Luke. She had convinced herself he was who she needed. I'll bet she had some of that realization with Teddy, possibly multiple times during that marriage. But she'd always maintained Teddy was the right decision and he was the best cover to her feelings for Deacon. Here she was getting ready to do it again. I applaud her for finally being truthful with herself, that no matter what happened between them, even when it's the very worst, he was the man she loved. Plus Deacon had just acknowledged to her that he still loved her even after her lie about Maddie and talking about their shared past to a reporter." She smiled. "I think it would have been easy to convince herself that Luke was the right choice, but love wins, right?" She shrugged. "It made it easy for Deacon too in the end, because he might have had to tell her about the cancer."
"He would have had to tell her. I think he realized that in the moment." He made a face. "But why not just go for it?"
"Maybe she just needs to find who she is again first. She tells Luke it's Deacon but not Deacon, so I think she is saying then that she wasn't running back to Deacon but that she realized she'd never been her true self when she wasn't with him." She shrugged. "I think I'd need to take a minute too. It's just never as simple as people on the outside think it should be."
He took her hand. "I think we're ready for tomorrow. Now I just want to sit with my girl." He pulled her back against him and then wrapped his arms around her. She sighed contentedly and settled back into him. He had an early call the next day and wouldn't be able to stay over, but at least they had some time together. He sat them up and reached over for the TV remote. He turned on the TV, scrolled down to a music station and then they spent the remaining time relaxing together. There was very little conversation, just a chance to enjoy being together.
When they finished the scene the next day, they walked across the production facility towards the dressing rooms. "I thought that went pretty well, don't you?" she asked.
He nodded. "I thought so too." He looked at her and smiled. "You're really good at the emotional stuff, you know?"
She playfully shook a finger at him and smiled back. "As are you. I swear I thought I could see just the tiniest hint of tears when Deacon told Rayna to take all the time she needed."
"Well, I think he's afraid he won't end up having any time with her. That was probably one of the hardest things he'd ever had to do."
"But it shows how well he knows her and understands her. He'll give her space because he knows she'd never ask for it if she didn't need it. And he'd do anything for her, even to his own detriment, I think."
When they were approaching the back, he stopped and she did too. "I'm, uh, taking the kids for the weekend and we're gonna go to Gatlinburg. See what there is to see."
"I think that's great, Chip. I know it'll be nice to have that time with them."
"I'll call when I get back on Sunday."
She nodded. "Sounds good." She stood there a moment longer, then turned and headed for wardrobe.
He texted late Sunday afternoon. I just dropped off the kids and am headed to apt. Can I see you later? She smiled. Of course.
When he got there he looked rested, relaxed, and happy. "Looks like you had a good weekend," she said.
"I really did. We had fun. There was lots of laughing. Good times."
She smiled. "I'm so glad. Do you feel like things are better?"
"I know they are. They said so. Even Addie. I don't know that she's 100% there yet, but she's better."
"That's amazing."
He hugged her, holding her tightly against him. "I feel like things are finally falling into place." He stepped back and looked at her. "Thank you for staying with me through this."
"Of course." She took his hand then and led him into the den. They sat and he put his arms around her. She was trying hard not to get too excited, because things could always change. But it really did seem like things were finally looking up.
"So Thanksgiving is coming up soon. Are you going back to LA?"
"Yeah, kind of. Yoby and I will be going with some friends to a place up at Big Sur for the Thanksgiving weekend though. And then we'll come back here." she turned her head to look at him. "What are you doing?"
"I'm going to my mom's. Taking the kids. Patty gets them at Christmas though."
"That's something to look forward to, right?"
"Yeah." She detected a hint of sadness in his voice. "I guess this is the thing that makes it real." She wasn't sure what to say, so she just put her hands on his arms, thinking that one day things might be better for everyone. He kissed the back of her head. "I don't want to be a downer."
She turned in his arms. "You're not a downer." She smiled. "But maybe we can do something that would be fun. You know."
He laughed. "I really do like how you think," he said. She was glad to see the sparkle back in his eyes and see the playfulness in his smile. He put a hand on her breast and caressed it. She could feel the anticipatory tingle and she also felt her nipple harden.
"Let's go then," she said, and got up from the couch. He stood up and took her in his arms, kissing her, letting his hands drift up from her waist to her breasts. She looked up at him, feeling a little breathless. She started towards the bedroom and he was close behind her. I know we said this wasn't everything but damn if I don't really enjoy it.