Rodney left Sam. The lady turned to the edge of the terrace and looked at the buildings in front of her, thoughtful. Jack came to her.
Sam heard Jack's footsteps and turned towards him. "Hey, honey."
"Hey, Sam."
"Is everything okay at the party? People have everything they need?"
"Uh, what? Uh, yes, it's perfect!" Jack replied, surprised by the questions.
Sam seemed obsessed with the organizational aspects of the event. She was taking her role very seriously. Perhaps it was also her strategy to hide her state of mind after her face to face discussion with McKay.
"You look concerned, Jack." Sam remarked, observing her husband.
"Not as much as you, Sam."
Sam frowned. Jack looked around, to make sure that nobody would hear them, at least, the beginning of their conversation. The bush was the last spot that his eyes checked. Nothing to report.
"I saw you with McKay, and I may have heard a few words of your conversation." Jack confessed to Sam, who was intrigued by his behavior.
"Uh…" the lady said, embarrassed, but not angry.
Jack felt very uncomfortable for he didn't know how to introduce the topic. He decided to get right to the point. Before that, he put his empty Champagne flute onto the edge.
"Look, Sam… Whatever this opportunity is, you should seize it."
The Vice Chief of Staff's advice destabilized Sam. "I'm sorry, what?" she retorted, rather irritated than relieved or satisfied.
Jack took a deep breath. "I'm not blind, Sam… Well, not anymore… I can see that you're not really okay with this - he pointed out the terrace and the people having fun - I mean, choosing decorations, chatting with politicians, spending most of your time at home… It's not you. It's not the Sam Carter I used to know."
O'Neill's right fingers started to play nervously with a button of his jacket. Sam remained immobile and impassive. It perturbed Jack as he couldn't tell if she was still irritated or not.
The general stopped the thing with the button and added, "Don't tell me you're not missing it…"
Obviously, the man had just made a big mistake, because outrage deformed Sam's face.
"Sorry… I thought… I..." Jack stammered. He was sincerely sorry. However, it didn't help Sam.
"What did you think, Jack?" Carter curtly interjected.
She crossed her arms and fixed her husband with an almost scornful look. Jack felt very uneasy.
"I could help you... If you want this offer... I could retire?" O'Neill suggested nervously, his fingers playing with the button again.
He obtained nothing but Sam's glare.
"What?!" she eventually exclaimed with a high-pitched voice.
Sam's reaction made Jack jump and his fingers leave the button.
The general's wife uncrossed her arms and held up her hands in utter confusion and exasperation. "I can't believe what I'm hearing!" she said and had to pause, to keep herself under control. She lowered her hands and resumed, angry, "Come on, Jack, we all know that you're gonna retire when pigs begin to fly."
"I can change that." Jack proposed, optimistic.
Sam moved her hands to forbid her husband to approach her, and exploded, "I can't believe that you're throwing this at my face right now, Jack!"
The man became very perplex. And scared. What the hell was happening? Why did he start this? Why couldn't he just enjoy the party like everybody?
Sam stiffly reminded him, "You said that you missed me and that you wanted me back in Washington with you! So, I quit Atlantis, to be with you. It hurt me - Sam placed a hand on her heart - but I was missing you, too. I thought that maybe it was actually time for me to be happy with the man I loved. So, I accepted it. Then, you got these promotions, Patrick and William came. You were so happy. I was so happy, too. But it was complicated. How could we handle twins, outstanding careers with the high probability of being sent anywhere anytime?"
Sam paused. Jack could see tears in her eyes. She concluded, "Someone had to step down."
Sam and Jack stared at each other in silence. No need to say out loud who had stepped down.
Sam broke the silence, "When you get the chance to become Vice Chief of Staff of the Air Force, you can't refuse. You were so thrilled about that. How could I complain, Jack? I've had an extraordinary life in the Air Force, in the Stargate Program, and now, I'm having an extraordinary life with my family.". Sam shook her head before she added, "Sometimes, you can't have everything at the same time. You have to make a choice, you have to do what you have to do to get it."
Jack tilted his head. He had already heard a part of Sam's last phrase. This evening, he was understanding the meaning of it.
"I let this happen..." Jack mumbled, avoiding eye contact. He was in fact mumbling rather to himself than to his wife.
Sam rolled her eyes and shook her head, annoyed. "What could you do? Protest? - Jack looked up at her - And protest about what, Jack?" she said, looking at Jack as if the answer was obvious and thus, his look right now, silly. "Protest about having me with you? Protest about being happy? Protest about being promoted? You looked so happy, and you deserve it. What was I supposed to say? Hey, honey, I want to go back to the SGC or somewhere else in the universe, can you take care of the kids for I don't know how long and by the way, you should retire and let me move forward?"
Jack was smart enough to not make a comment. Sam paused. She was on the verge of shedding tears.
She managed to hold them by tightening her fists and confiding, "I love you, I love the boys, and I wouldn't trade it for anything.". Tears eventually became stronger and started to wet her cheeks. Sam didn't pay attention and continued, the voice quavering, "But yes, I miss it - she placed her right fist on her heart - Why do you think I left the conversation with Cameron and John? Because hearing them talk about their new adventures and the ones we've shared hurts. I'm sure they're not doing that to hurt me on purpose. But it hurts - Sam placed her right fist on her heart again - I should be there..."
Sam wiped the tears away with her hands and gave Jack an accusing look. "And now, you dare to throw at my face that I could have this life again, as if it would be that simple?" she blamed Jack with a sharp voice.
Jack swallowed, feeling extremely bad. Unfortunately, Sam hadn't finished with him.
"What the hell did you think, Jack? Last time, you…"
Sam unexpectedly halted, realizing before it was too late that the conversation may end in a negative way. Moreover, her right index was aiming at Jack.
She took a deep breath to calm herself down before she concluded, "I probably should go home before I say something I could regret.". Sam wiped away the traces left by tears on her face to look less miserable, and ordered, "Just tell whoever asks that I was tired."
The lady left the terrace, upset, and disappeared in the reception hall. Jack didn't try to hold her back. He knew it would be pointless. Leaving her alone for a moment was the best to do. He stayed on the terrace, and rested his hands on the edge, looking at his flute.
Holy crap.
Things had been said.
Jack had made choices. Sam had made choices, driven by Jack's choices.
O'Neill sensed tears in his eyes. He glimpsed at the four stars on his epaulets. He suddenly wanted to wrench and throw them away. He was ashamed that he had left his best partner aside and conflicted while he was having the cake and eating it. They were going to welcome a third child. He was going to take over Albert Kent as the new Chief of Staff of the Air Force. How could Sam expect to commit to a career again like before?
Jack could still decline the offer, but it wouldn't help.
The real issue was beneath the visible part of the iceberg.
What would happen next?