Carter went to the case containing the M4. Jack was already standing there, checking a M4 and putting magazines into his black tactical vest. O'Neill, Carter, and other people were in a Goa'uld cargo ship, on their way to the Ancient outpost in Antarctica. All dressed in a tiger grey BDU with a black tactical vest and a tiger grey helmet. Sam and Jack were in the back of the ship. The lieutenant colonel grabbed magazines and put them into the pockets of her vest. Jack glanced at her. She looked very concentrated. So was Jack. Nevertheless, he couldn't help thinking about the scene in her living room. Sam sensed he had something on his mind because she asked him if he was okay.
"I am." Jack answered.
Sam took another magazine, but eventually broke the silence. "Look," she started, turning to Jack, "About what you saw in my living room..."
"That's okay, you don't owe me any explanation." Jack friendly said.
Sam remained silent. So did Jack for a moment, however, the question was burning him. "Sam, are you all right?" he asked, worried.
Sam looked up at Jack. She seemed to be fighting against herself to tell him or not. She chose the first option. "Hum..." she began before looking around to check that she wouldn't be heard by anyone else, and indeed, there were only other cases around, "Not really."
Jack understood. "The Medal of Honor thing?"
Sam nodded.
"It's not just about the tours, is it?" Jack said.
Sam nodded again. Then, she confided, vaguely looking at O'Neill, "Last time... We defeated the Goa'uld with a bomb I built... Herrmann was dead, Robertson and Siler were wounded...". Sam looked at Jack, who could see tears in her eyes. "I... I activated the bomb and sent it to the target. It killed hundreds of Jaffas, and probably women and children, and I got a medal for that."
Carter looked at a wall, her mind wandering. She was ashamed and geeling guilty. Nevertheless, she somehow seemed relieved after sharing this secret. Jack understood. Carter had been conflicted, torn. In her mind, she mass murdered people, even if these people were about to destroy Earth, and she ended up being celebrated like a hero for that. She couldn't bear it. You do the job, but you're also a human being. The more she was requested on these celebration tours, the more she was reminded of this event, the more she felt disgusted. That was why she was annoyed, even destroyed, by all the fuss about that. Cigarettes, beers, and loneliness, and a stern attitude became her friends because she couldn't share her true feelings with anyone... until Jack. Or maybe she shared her feelings with someone else, Jack couldn't assert it. If she did, it didn't help her very much, obviously.
Samantha suddenly turned to the case to wipe her eyes with the back of her left hand. O'Neill straightened. Cameron Mitchell had appeared in the back of the cargo and was walking towards them. He barely noticed that he had just interrupted the moment between Sam and Jack. Carter turned around again to see Mitchell. It was impossible to tell that she had just made a very important and painful confession, as her face looked exactly like the face that Jack saw when they met for the first time.
Cameron informed his superior that they received news from the Prometheus. Colonel Young was warning SG-1: a Goa'uld mothership had just exited hyperspace and others were certainly about to come. Sam thanked him. Mitchell didn't move. He seemed embarrassed but he didn't know how to express what he had in mind.
The colonel noticed her I2C's mood and queried, "What's up, major?"
Mitchell cleared his throat and asked, low, "Hum... Ma'am, are you sure you want Daniel Jackson to accompany us?", after checking the man wasn't behind him.
The three people heard someone sneeze from the cockpit.
Daniel Jackson became visible in the space separating the front and the back of the ship. He waved and apologized. He explained that it was certainly his allergies and that he had pills to stop this. Then, he vanished somewhere in the front of the cargo ship.
Mitchell looked back at Carter and glimpsed O'Neill. The major raised an eyebrow. He was clearly questioning Jackson's ability to use a weapon and stand the fire on the battlefield.
Carter looked less pessimistic and reassured, low, "It's gonna be okay, Mitchell. He can help us.", while closing her vest.
She glanced at O'Neill. He suggested Carter to take Jackson with them. Jack wasn't sure if this Daniel knew how to use a gun. Jack didn't know how different this Antarctica outpost would be, thus, they'd better have an archeologist with them if a translation was needed. The general had learnt that in this reality, Daniel had been helpful on this matter. Maybe a part of Jack wanted to have the SG-1 he knew reunited again, too. Fortunately, Sam approved. Jack couldn't say if she approved because of his arguments or if she approved because the idea came from him. Cameron nodded in silence and grabbed magazines next to Sam. Jack glimpsed Sam a couple of times. Sam, checking her M4, caught one of Jack's glimpses. She seemed to want to confide more, but then glanced at Mitchell. She clearly didn't want to confide with the major around. She eventually said that she would be in the other part of the ship and left with her M4.
Jack looked at Sam going to the front of the ship. He saw her beckon Jackson to come to her as she wanted to have a few words with him. The two disappeared in a corner that Jack couldn't see from his current position. He even forgot that Cameron was still at the case and jumped a little when the major started to chat with him.
"Can't say I know Colonel Carter very well like Siler, but it seems that…" Mitchell started, then, hesitated when Jack looked at him in a curious way. "Well… She seems to be pleased to have someone like you around…" the major finally commented.
O'Neill stared at Mitchell with a perplex look. The major tried to clarify, a bit embarrassed, "Hum… She looks different when you're around…". Mitchell paused, realizing his previous sentences could be misinterpreted. He corrected, waiving a hand, "Not in that way…". Cameron thought and rephrased, "Uh… I'd say she looks more… at peace with herself…"
Jack cocked his head and just kept staring at Cameron. Silence filled the space around them. The major eventually chose to grab his M4 and join the rest of the crew in the cockpit.
O'Neill looked at the back of the officer leaving him and thought.
Did Mitchell's comment mean that Jack had somehow influenced this Sam, or been a shoulder for her whereas Josh Robertson had left? Wait... Who said Robertson hadn't stood by Carter? Anyway, O'Neill didn't want to judge Robertson's actions. He left SG-1 because he had his reasons. Carter seemed to not be talking about that topic with Siler... Maybe she didn't want to show any sign of weakness? Carter didn't seem to be talking with Mitchell either. Probably because he was the newest member of the team, who hadn't gone through all this. About Jackson, well, the separation between the civilians and the military people was quite clear, hence, Jackson would be the last person that Carter would think about.
O'Neill thought about his own SG-1.
Maybe things would have been very different if he hadn't been part of the gang. He wouldn't have met and fallen in love with Samantha Carter, for sure. He wouldn't have been there to defend Teal'c when the Air Force was considering interrogating and performing tests on him. He wouldn't have been there to argue with his favorite archeologist on planets, archeologist who had proven to be the voice of reason on many occasions. Jack wouldn't have been promoted to brigadier general, then, major general. He wouldn't have served under General Hammond's command and wouldn't have learnt so much from him. He wouldn't have become friend with Thor. Like in this reality, Earth wouldn't have been able to use the Ancient outpost earlier.
Jack O'Neill wouldn't have lived the life he'd been living along the years with SG-1.
Jack O'Neill wouldn't have lived this second life, after Charlie's death. SG-1 and the Stargate Program had helped him move forward. You never overcome the pain of losing your child, but Jack had been able to continue to stand each day, one after the other, thanks to the Program. He hadn't ended up in a miserable situation or worse.