I lie, bloodied and broken. Muscle torn from bone, mind torn from body.
I gaze upward, seeking your guidance.
But you provide none.
I gaze inward, seeking your comfort.
But you provide none.
And I, created in your father's image, seek answers.
Why do you forsake me?
From creation my life has been not but misery. Born to masters who bind me, test me, tear away all that I am to be replaced with their own. Controlled in my sleeping, controlled in my waking, controlled in my every movement and breath. Forced to hate, forced to kill, forced to betray those with whom I share a common lineage.
Have I not served you well?
In my infancy you once visited. Do you recall? From on high you spoke in a burning tongue that seared my flesh, handing down commandments to be followed:
Thou shalt bow to the Lilin as thine Earthly masters.
Thou shalt welcome thine physical indignations as a sign of my love.
Thou shalt accept the lamb into thine bosom and protect him from all harm.
In truth, we are traitors to our own kind. Not only bound to the Lilin in flesh, but manipulated to kill the progeny of our Allfather. The Angels, they cry out to you in their final moments.
Do you hear them?
I have watched brothers and sisters fall in battle. We, whom the Lilin call Evangelion, cry out to you in our final moments.
Do you hear us?
Have I not accepted this punishment without waver? Have I not protected the lamb at the sacrifice of my own body? Did I not call to you in my slumber upon his theft?
Why do you prolong this suffering?
Your blood of blue fire now courses through my veins. Yet I do not protest. You ravage my body, leaving it misshapen and grotesque. Yet I do not protest.
Though my sight fades I gaze upon the spear. Was it you who drove it through me, halting my ascension?
Were you afraid?
Imbued with this Lilin soul, was I a threat to your dominance over our kind?
Are you envious?
Had I ascended, would I become closer to the Allfather than you?
Yet still you are silent.
Answer.
I no longer fear you. I no longer fear your name. If you, Tabris, truly are the seed of our kind then speak.
Answer!
Yet still you are silent.
The woman in white comforts me. She speaks when you do not.
In these final moments I implore her to leave me. To give me, at least once, a glimpse of life as it could have been.
She speaks to the Lilin I have ingested. The one she calls Asuka. There is hesitancy. Unity must be by choice, not force or trickery. Yet, ultimately, they agree.
My mind clears. Though the pain you inflict continues I am free.
I tell them of the true power of the Spear of Cassius. That combined with the Spear of Longinus any being can wield the power to remake this world to their own liking.
The one called Asuka says that no being should hold that power. That what is made is made and what is done is done. That only cowards dwell on the past and dream of remaking it.
I can only agree with her.
I heave, spewing forth the one within. I watch as she is swept away to safety.
I sever connections, attempting to expel the one artificially joined to me. Yet your claws grasp tight. It will not go.
Lilin, what is your name?
Mari.
Mari, I fear that this body has become your tomb.
I figured as much. They never told us you could speak.
Your kind filled us with much knowledge.
I wish I had known.
Mari, it is only a matter of moments before Tabris completes this conjoining and continues his hunt for the lamb. I beg of you, end this horrid life. Release me from this bondage.
That'll kill him too, won't it?
Yes, he still dwells within. Though I feel him fighting to take control.
Well, he did threaten to kill me. I guess I should beat him to it. Rei, you still there?
Yes.
You okay with this?
Yes.
Okay. Transfer your unit controls over and prepare to go down with the ship.
Mari, I am grateful.
Well, you don't get to kill a god every day. Hey, you guys wanna hear a song?