Authors Note: So it only took ten years and a global pandemic for me to revisit the world of writing fan fiction. I'll be the first to admit, this story was not written well; however, the idea and the original characters never truly left me. During these past few months I've begun to completely rewrite this story without any intention of publishing it here, and have gone as far as changing plot lines, removing and adding scenes, and recreating characters.
The main reason I began rewriting this was for myself. I re-read the story, and cringed at nearly every chapter. Thank you so much to everyone who was so kind and continued to encourage me despite it all. I had all these ideas swimming around in my head for years and decided to give it another chance. To anyone who read the original, this rewrite does follow the general plot, but with some significant changes. It is still very much a Sirius/OC fic, but rather than jumping right into things I've decided to make it a slow burn and focus heavily on developing my OC's and their place in the amazing world created by JK Rowling. So thank you to anyone who wants to read this version; however, I understand completely if it is not your thing.
Enjoy.
It was colder than usual in the Riddle house. Three others and I had just returned from a small town in northern Yorkshire where four muggle born families were murdered. Bellatrix's cackle rang in my ears along with the screams of the witches and wizards. My eyes were unfocused as the Dark Lord entered the room with what could only be considered a smile on his face. He seemed pleased with us and he praised us for our accomplishment. This night marked the first multiple Death Eater attack, and we all knew what that meant; the war had started.
"Ana, dinner's ready!" I heard my mother's voice carry up the stairs.
It was the end of my long, dreary summer. A summer spent reading, helping out around the house, and making sub par memories with my family. Normally, I loved the summer. It was a break from school and time that I could spend with my friends and generally just relaxing before the dreaded week before going back to Hogwarts, where the readings would pile up and the comments from my parents that I had wasted my entire summer would ensue.
This year was different, life was changing. I was no longer allowed off the property without parental or sibling supervision. The world was changing, and it was no longer safe for us out there alone according to my dad, who was a bit more over protective than he needed to be.
All because of one stupid bloke. Voldemort they called him. He was a psychopath, from what I had gathered. He was a dark wizard who led an extremist group that believed in blood purity, and they were responsible for the events that were unfolding and the reason I wasn't able to visit my friends. I'd heard the name for years. My father was an Auror with the Ministry of Magic, and although he tried to keep us in the dark about all the horrific things he dealt with at work, occasionally him and his buddies would get together in the lounge with the expensive scotch and talk too loudly.
Voldemort was pure evil, and I knew every year things seemed to be getting worse rather than better. My father had been so certain they would get this under control, that they would catch him and put an end to the terrible things that he stood for; however, more and more witches and wizards were going missing and turning up dead. More groups were joining him, those that were considered outcasts in our world were becoming more powerful and feared.
The Daily Prophet was full of articles written about people being scared to leave their homes in fear that they would find themselves in the wrong place at the wrong time. At first I thought it was all rubbish, some sort of weird propaganda the Ministry conjured up to keep us subdued and that all the kidnappings and deaths were just a simple coincidence, but the day my father came home from work, about a week into summer holidays and sat us all down before putting strict boundaries in place, is when it all became too real. I had never seen him so shaken than that day. It had been a month and a half since I had left the manor, and although I was frustrated, I understood the need to be cautious. I trusted my father, he wouldn't keep us from the world if it wasn't necessary.
My brother on the other hand, fought tooth and nail over the restrictions.
He couldn't understand why we, a pure blood family, needed to worry. In his mind we were safe. We weren't the ones that were going missing and there weren't any cases of pure bloods getting murdered by Voldemort or his followers. Over the summer I had watched him change. He changed into an unrecognizable version of himself, one that I was certain agreed with Voldemort's views. Not only was this monster tearing apart our world, he was infecting my family.
Every day was a battle between my parents and him. He tried convincing them that we were on the wrong side, that we should be joining Voldemort. Why? Because Voldemort promised power and security to those that joined him and destruction to those who didn't. It didn't help that he was in Slytherin, and many of his house mates and their families were into that kind of thing. Whenever my parents were out, it seemed that he made a habit of inviting his friends over and I heard the conversations about their families joining the cause. They called themselves death eaters, and they called Voldemort the Dark Lord.
It was eerie.
I, on the other hand was a Gryffindor, and my friends were just as against Voldemort as I was. We used to talk about it when were back in school and still able to see one another. We'd talk about how there was no way the blood purists would win if a war was ever started. Based on what we saw, Slytherin's were idiots. Although spending these past few months around my brother and his friends, I was starting to realize they didn't talk about it like it was all hypothetical. They truly believed what they were willing to fight for was right.
I walked into the kitchen, but there was no food on the table as promised.
"I don't see anything to eat." I said disappointedly, but it seemed no one was listening.
I cleared my throat loudly, trying to pull their attention away from their argument. "Hello, sorry to break up the festivities. There isn't anything to eat, why'd you call me down?" My mom finally stopped squabbling with my brother and turned her attention to me.
"We are eating outside dear, your father is already at the table. Why don't you go out and join him." She said sounding exasperated. Not wanting to engage in all this family nonsense, I sauntered out the back doors and towards the part of the yard where my father sat under the pavilion.
As frustrated as I was to be cooped up on the manor, I loved where I lived. No neighbors for miles, and all that surrounded us was good ole nature. There was a lake on the other side of the hill that was only a brief walk away, which is where I spent most of my time anyways. So many memories were made at that lake and the surrounding forest. I often had my group of friends to the house, James, Sirius, Peter, Remus, and Lily.
I'd met Sirius my first year at Hogwarts and we instantly became friends. We bonded over the fact that we came from predominantly Slytherin inherited families, yet somehow we both ended up in Gryffindor. I was a shy first year back then, and he was the outgoing one. He formed a tight circle of friends, but never left me behind.
I met Lily my second year of school. We had crossed paths being in the same year and house, but we never spent much time together until being partnered up on a potions assignment. We bonded quickly, though we had nothing in common. She was a muggle born but I was fascinated about the way she lived. On a whim, she invited me back to her home for part of winter break and I gladly accepted, thrilled at the prospect of living among muggles for a week. It was during that time we became fast and close friends.
She was a nerd, and I was a mischief maker, mainly because of who I hung out with. Whoever said you should be careful who you surround yourself with was absolutely correct. They changed me from the shy, innocent little girl to the pain in the ass I was.
The warm evening air fluttered around me as I walked through the grass. When I reached the table I sat down across from my father and stared at the glorious last meal we would be having together as a family.
It was bittersweet.
I settled my gaze on him when he finally spoke. "I have a feeling they will be in there for a while, you may start if you're hungry, Ana." He said lazily, not looking up from his book.
Grinning, I quickly grabbed my plate and piled on all the mouthwatering food that was spread on the table in front of me. I began to eat my meal alone while my dad continued to read his book.
I knew he wasn't actually reading, he hadn't flipped his page the entire time I had been sitting there. He was listening to the argument occurring inside that had increased in volume and carried out into the yard. Good thing we didn't have neighbors, they'd think we all hated each other.
I continued to eat in silence, the tension making me feel uncomfortable. He must've sensed it, because sighing before he closed his book, he turned to me for conversation as he tried to turn our attention away from the shouting coming from inside. "Did you get all your readings done before school starts?" He asked and I snorted at his lack of awareness. It's like he didn't even know his own daughter. "I'll take that as a no." He laughed and I flashed him an innocent grin.
"How are you faring on learning occlumency? You and Shay still competing?" He raised his brow, changing the subject.
"Getting really good. I'm working on planting thoughts. I've come a long way in a month." I bragged, causing him to smile proudly at me.
"That's my girl. You're going to outshine your brother again in no time." He laughed as I feigned arrogance.
"Was that ever a question?" I said before taking a bite of my dinner roll. "What is going on with Shay and mum anyways? I know you were listening."
"Just a disagreement." He said vaguely.
"Does it involve Voldemort again?" I asked as I shoveled roasted potatoes into my mouth.
"Unfortunately, yes." His voice went stern.
I couldn't believe Shay would do this to our parents. I was getting extremely frustrated with it, it felt like he was tearing our happy family apart. "He's an idiot" I retorted.
"Ana, he's scared."
"Just because he's scared doesn't mean he has to go against everything you've ever taught us." I rolled my eyes.
"We never expected this as parents." He pinched the bridge of his nose. "We will never forced either of you to choose sides, we always taught you to make your own decisions. You are a pure blood Ana, you come from a long line of prominent pure bloods and in his mind he is supporting what is in his ancestry. I cannot fault him for that." He sighed.
I looked at him skeptically before I said "You can't honestly tell me you support Voldemort." which caused him to laugh.
"Absolutely not, but I understand where you brother is coming from. We are who we surround ourselves with. You, your mother, and I are lucky to be surrounded by like minded witches and wizards who are inclusive to everyone, whether it be muggle born or pure blood. Your brother is surrounded by blood purists, many who's families support Voldemort's vision and encourage their children to do the same. All I can hope for is that he makes the right choices when it counts."
"You didn't turn out to be like them and you were in Slytherin" I stated.
"We also were not in the middle of a war, Ana. We were exposed to the same prejudices and were taught certain things, but we were not in a position where we needed to choose sides." He countered.
I sighed. He was right. My parents went to school during a simpler time. Yes, the dark arts still existed and blood purity intolerances existed, but there wasn't a fanatic running around encouraging pure bloods to join his cause in eliminating the rest. That occurred before his time, when Salazar was running the show. Voldemort, or the Dark Lord as his loyal subjects referred to him as, was picking up where he left off.
I had already finished eating dinner by the time mum joined us; however, their argument had obviously not been resolved as Shay radiated with anger as he walked behind her and sat as far away as possible.
The remainder of dinner was awkward. Mum tried to make light of our last night together, keeping the conversation easy and avoiding any topics that could be turned into debate. After they had all finished their dinners, and I had finished my second helping, I excused myself from the table and headed up to my room to pack my trunk for school.
We were to take the train to Hogwarts tomorrow, and I was not even slightly close to being ready. I had a habit of procrastinating and was waiting until later that night to pack up all of my possessions. I had hoped that my state of being tired would overpower my excited thoughts about being reunited with my long lost friends, but my mind was still buzzing.
Before reaching the top of the stairs, I heard footsteps on the staircase behind me and I turned to see Shay following. He still looked angry. "I need to talk to you, now." He ordered harshly.
"I'm busy right now Shay, I'll talk to you later." I said, irritated as I continued to walk up the stairs and towards my room. I wasn't happy with him ruining our last night together as a family.
"No Ana, now. It's important." He said more firmly. I exhaled loudly and headed towards his room instead before he closed the door behind us firmly.
Three guesses what this could be about.
"What is it?" I asked carelessly as I threw myself down onto his bed.
"You're friends with that blood traitor, right?" He asked, sitting in the chair across from me.
"I'm sorry, I don't know to whom you are referring to, I'm pretty sure I am friends with several." I said sarcastically, trying to get under his skin. I knew exactly who he was talking about.
He was talking about Sirius.
"Black." He muttered his name with a look of disgust.
"Sure, we're acquainted."
I rolled my eyes. Of course Shay knew I was friends with Sirius Black. He came to the house dozens of times each year since my first year of Hogwarts, we spend nearly all our time together at school, and he'd accompanied us on several vacations so it frustrated me that he was being so dismissing of our obvious friendship.
"You need to stay away from him this year." He stated.
"Excuse me?" I asked angrily.
"Even though I think you're being stupid, you're still my sister and I care about you. I don't want to see you get hurt."
"How would my friendship with Sirius get me hurt?" The anger melted away and I was genuinely confused at this point.
"Being close with him is dangerous." He said lowering his voice.
"Why?" I inquired. He was clearly holding something back.
"There are a lot of plans in motion, and his family won't hesitate in forcing him to see the way they do, you know that."
I knew that better than anyone. I saw the scars from the years of abuse and the fresh bruises when he returned from winter and summer break. Sure, Sirius went against everything his family stood for, but that was nothing new. His parents took it out on him, practically disowning him and were so twisted in thinking they could convert him by beating him into submission, but there was no reason his relationship with his family would affect me. We were friends and that was the extent of it.
I looked down at my hands, picking at my nails as I thought about my best friend and his abusive home life. My house hadn't been the cheery one I was used to lately, but at least I never felt unsafe or unloved. "If you're close to him, they might use you to convince him." He looked at me, suddenly speaking softer than when the conversation had started.
Was he actually worried about something happening to me?
"Who are they? I don't-" I began before getting cut off by his now firm voice.
"Ana please. It makes me so god damn angry that you are being this fucking stubborn and choosing the wrong side, but if that's the way you are going to go then you need to at least cut ties with Black." He said cruelly, standing from his chair as I flinched.
Shay was much bigger than me, standing at over six feet with broad shoulders and a sturdy build. He had a deep, powerful voice, and although he didn't actually raise his voice at me, I normally I wasn't on the receiving end of his anger and it frightened me.
He must've noticed my demeanor change, so he sat back down with a huff.
"I'm just trying to look out for you." His voice was soft and I could tell he was struggling with something.
Shaking it off, I stood. "He's my best friend Shay, I can't just abandon him, especially if it is getting as bad as you say it is. He clearly needs the support when there are people like you out there giving him such a hard time." I said firmly, not letting him guilt me into doing exactly what he wanted.
"I love you Shay and that will never change, but you need to stop treating me like a child and telling me what to do. I can make up my own fucking mind and I can take care of myself." I turned and stormed out of his room towards my own and shut the door firmly behind me as I laid down on my bed, pinching the crown of my nose at the feeling of a headache coming on.
He was infuriating. How could he honestly expect me to stop seeing my best friend. Someone who had always been there for me when I needed it. I hated this new world, I hated the way it was pitting people against each other, and I wished things could go back to how they used to be when all we ever disagreed about was who would do the chores, or whether or not I stole something from him or if he simply misplaced it.
Shay was never the 'happy go lucky' type of guy, but he was never angry. It didn't help that we were both competing over who could be more stubborn than the other. He wanted things seen his way, and I wanted things seen mine. That would never change, but we used to be able to meet somewhere in the middle eventually. This argument had been going on for far too long and I was sick of it.
I groaned and looked towards my unpacked trunk. Now more than ever I looked forward to getting out of here and back to Hogwarts. I'd be free from Shay, only seeing him occasionally in the hallways, and wouldn't have to listen to his delusions every single day. It would be nice to have a break.
I raised myself off my bed and started tossing in the items I would need at Hogwarts. It only took me half an hour until I was done, and once I double checked that everything was accounted for I sat down on my bed looking at the loaded trunk sadly.
This was going to be a hard year. Everything that Shay had just told me about my relationship with Sirius made my stomach tight. Although I didn't know for sure, I had a feeling that there was more going on than he was letting on. A part of me questioned whether or not Shay was further gone than I thought.
Over the summer, a certain Slytherin and I had grown close, so close that I'd actually entertained the idea that he would end up my first official boyfriend, but he had stomped on my heart just as quickly as he had weaseled his way into it. During our intimate conversations however, he hinted that the Dark Lord had recruited some students from Hogwarts, practically admitting him and his brother were aligned with some inner circle, and now I was wondering if Shay was a part of that too. Maybe that was why he seemed so certain that Sirius and I were in danger. But the thought of my brother being so involved in something like that didn't seem possible.
Sighing at my running mind, I changed into a pair of shorts and a loose t-shirt before grabbing my yoga mat and heading down the stairs and out through the back door. I passed my parents my way out, smiling at them as I caught them cuddled up on the sofa with some drinks in their hands.
I laid my mat down on the patio next to the pool, looking out to the west where the sun was lowering in the sky. Nearly every night at sunset or at moonrise, I did an hour of yoga and finished off with a short meditation. It was my time alone; a time to calm my mind and escape the insane world around me. Taking a deep breath, I raised into tree pose and began my session.
It was dark by the time I opened my eyes and I sat cross legged on my mat, facing out where the sun had recently set. My mind was empty, and the only thing I focused on was the excitement at starting a new school year and a new chapter in my life.
Sunlight poured through the large window across from where I slept on my bed as I opened my eyes the next morning. I laid in bed for a moment, stretching my tight limbs and pulling the blankets up to my face, embracing the warmth of my personal cozy cloud for the last time. My mind started racing with the excitement of going back to Hogwarts so I got up and dressed myself for the day. I pulled my long dark blonde hair up into a loose pony tail and bounded down the stairs as the smell of coffee brewing in the kitchen called to me.
My parents were sat at the kitchen island in their routine; my dad reading the Daily Prophet and my mom reading one of her novels.
"Morning." I greeted cheerily as I poured myself a cup of coffee from the carafe. The warm liquid heated my insides and awakened my senses as I strolled across the kitchen, leaning against the island opposite my parents. I grabbed an orange and began peeling the skin as Shay walked in. He mirrored my actions as he filled a cup and stood next to me.
"Are you guys ready for school?" My dad asked as he put his paper down and turned his full attention to the family gathering.
"Yup." I said before shoving a slice of my orange in my mouth.
"You going to sit with me on the train?" Shay bumped his shoulder to mine and winked down at me.
"You wish." I smiled up at him, which quickly turned to a glare as he plucked the orange slice from between my fingers and chowed down.
"I'm going to miss seeing my baby sister every day. I realized you're not all bad being stuck with you this summer."
"You're a little behind on that realization. Everyone else has known for years." I said smugly. Shay snorted and turned back to finish his coffee.
The room felt comfortable and made me feel nostalgic; I was going to miss the family time, but I was excited to see my friends again and be back at school. I was so thankful for my family even in the dark times that were trying to tear us apart. We were always there for each other and we always had each others backs. I was nervous for what this year would bring. Something felt different, and I worried that with Shay being in Slytherin and me being in Gryffindor we would be pitted against each other, but all I could do was remember the bond we had and hope that it was enough to keep us strong.
"Well you two, we should get going. It's half past ten, you don't want to miss the train." My dad rose from his seat, waving his wand to clean the mess from breakfast.
I stood lazily from my seat and followed Shay to the front entrance where our trunks were resting. Mum opened the front door as my dad levitated our belongings out into the fresh late summer morning and after giving my parents a tight hug as we said our goodbyes, I took Shay's arm. I inhaled sharply as I waited for the unpleasant experience of apparation.
The distant bustling of King's Cross Station flooded my senses as I opened my eyes. We were in a secluded room used by wizarding families who used apparation to travel to the train station so as to not draw attention to ourselves, so I loaded my luggage onto a trolley and followed Shay out of the room as we made our way to platform 9 and 3 quarters. We travelled through the gateway and left our luggage with the man who was loading everything onto the train and began I walking along the platform towards one of the sidecar doors when I heard the sound of someone shouting my name.
"Ana, Ana! Over here Ana!" I heard James Potter's excited voice drifting through one of the compartment windows.
"Ana, get your ass in here!" Sirius' head poked out of the window next to James'.
I smiled and waved at them before turning to Shay, who was giving me a knowing look.
"You're not going to control who I spend my year with." I rolled my eyes.
He sighed and grabbed hold of my shoulders and pulled me in for a brotherly hug, his large frame crushing me into him. "Just please be careful." He muttered quietly.
"I wish you would just tell me what the hell is going on."
"I would if I could." He squeezed me tightly before unwrapping his arms and resting his hands on my shoulders again. "I love you."
"I love you too, I'll see you in a few hours." I laughed at his dramatics and punching him playfully in the chest, making him smile. He pushed me away from him gently and ruffled my hair then turned to enter the train.
"Awww aren't you two just adorable." Sirius mocked as he watched our sibling interaction from the window.
"Shut it, Black." I said as I walked a few paces to enter the train and locate the compartment they had claimed. When I opened the sliding door I was greeted with another unexpected hug. Sirius had his arms wrapped tightly around me and I instinctively hugged him back as I chuckled. Like Shay, he was much bigger than me, so he crushed me in the tight embrace.
"How was your summer?" He asked as we took our seats across from Remus, Peter, and James.
"Uneventful, yours?" I asked.
"Same. Glad to be heading back to Hogwarts! I'm ready to cause some fucking trouble." He exclaimed and the others cheered excitedly.
"I second that." I said, leaning back against the seat and looking out the window as the train began to move. Only a few more hours and I would be back at school with my friends, and Sirius.