Disclaimer: I do not own Smallville, Arrowverse, Deadpool or anything else you may recognize

So this is an idea I had for fun. The premise here is that Smallville and Arrowverse versions of characters will meet each other and the version I feel is superior will get to diss the inferior one in brutal ways.

Now this is pure crack and is not supposed to make sense so don't get red with anger and all that if I diss on someone you like, because I don't really mean it (Or maybe I do. Who cares?).

And characters can and will sound OOC at times but that's because this is pure dissing crack. Plus, all of them will break the 4th wall too.

Also, in this chapter, Smallville Clark will be called Clark and the Arrowverse version will be called Kent.

So with all the ground rules laid, let's begin.

Chapter 1- Only one Man of Steel

The audience cheered as Wade Wilson aka Deadpool walked onto the stage, waving to everyone happily as he took his place on the podium.

"Hello, audience. As you all know, I am Wade Wilson aka Deadpool, known to some as that moronic Green Lantern in that shitty movie which has a moron in-charge behind it. And let's not talk about Blade: Trinity or a certain silent attempt on my character", Wade said as all laughed and cheered.

"So as you all know, Smallville and Arrowverse are among the two biggest DC TV Universes and are responsible for a lot of stuff", Wade said. "Smallville was a retelling of Superman's origin story and as time went on, it introduced several other characters from DC mythos to make it more interesting and managed to have an astonishingly long run of 10 Seasons! I mean- damn! I didn't expect it to last five. Anyway, except Seasons 6 and 7 and to an extent, 8, all of them are rather enjoyable and have more good than bad. Of course they ruined my brother from DC but that's a whole other story. And this show was so popular that they even gave it a Season 11 in the form of comics, and they went on for a long time too."

Everyone laughed and nodded at what Wade was saying before he announced. "Then we have the Arrowverse. It was born from the success of Smallville itself. The first show was Arrow, a grounded retelling of the Green Arrow's origin story. But over time, it became more popular and as time went on, gave birth to a TV Universe named after the main show. First to come from this was The Flash, which was awesome for 2 Seasons. Then came Supergirl, which originally aired on CBS but eventually changed networks. Then came Legends of Tomorrow, which had supporting characters from both Arrow and Flash to make a time-travelling, though it eventually turned into a cringe-worthy, plot-less version of Doctor Who. And the latest in this line-up is the feminist/LGBT propaganda garbage known as Batwoman. Plus, they have more planned for the future. Yeah, this started out great but is now a MCU wannabe."

Everyone laughed and nodded once more at Wade's truthful words.

"But we are here because my buddy Aragorn had a new story idea", Wade said. "Smallville and Arrowverse versions of characters will meet and the superior will diss the inferior."

Wade then stopped and said. "Wait! Insieme per la vittoria already did that with the original Devil May Cry characters dissing the ones from the reboot."

He looked up and said. "Aragorn, you fucking piece of shit! So original, ain't ya? Huh!"

Wade looked back at the audience and said. "What a hack this guy is! Anyway, Aragorn may be an unoriginal hack, but this idea is still gonna run. So now we will begin Round 1."

And then everyone started clapping as Wade raised his hands. "It's all right! Now hear me out!"

All stopped as he said. "There are many superheroes. Some good. Some bad. But all of them began with the one and only- Superman!"

Everyone clapped and cheered as Wade said. "Of course the guy wore his underwear above his pants when he first came, and he couldn't even fly, for which he is so popular. But he is the first superhero, so he can do anything you know!"

All laughed as Wade continued. "He was born on Krypton as Kal-El. But the planet was about to be destroyed so his father Jor-El sent him to Earth in a pod. He crashed near a farm and was adopted by the kind and elderly Kent couple who longed for a child. They named him Clark Kent. All his life, Clark wondered why he was so different, and after his father's death, set out to find his origins, which he eventually did when he ended up in the Fortress of Solitude. And after his training was finished, he put on his underwear above his pants, and became the savior of all mankind. But he needed a disguise too. So he became the bumbling, mild-mannered reporter known as Clark Kent. But we all know what he truly is. The giver of hope. Superman!"

Everyone clapped and laughed again before Wade said. "Now there have been many adaptations of the Man of Steel. You had Kirk Alyn in some 40's serials. You had George Reeves in a 50's serial. But the definitive portrayal of Superman is none other than the great Christopher Reeve himself. Rest in peace, good sir."

Everyone closed their eyes and sat silently for a minute to respect Reeve before Wade continued the show. "Now on live TV, we have had two portrayals of the Man of Steel so far in this decade. One is none other than the version played by the sexy and muscular Tom Welling in Smallville itself, the show that gave birth to live-action superhero TV. Now he didn't suit up until the final episode. He didn't even learn to fly until the final episode. But he was developed nicely as a character for 10 years. Well, mostly nice, aside from being spineless in front of Lana Lang. But that's a whole other story. Still, even if he didn't wear the suit, he is many people's favorite, and Aragorn's 2nd favorite after the legendary Reeve himself, who happened to appear in Smallville twice and even passed on the torch and cape to the younger Welling."

Everyone nodded as images of Welling's Clark and fan-art of him in the suit appeared on the screen behind Wade, which people loved.

Then Wade said. "And in late 2016, the Arrowverse show known as Supergirl finally decided to have their own version of Superman, played by Tyler Hoechlin of Teen Wolf fame. The guy has….sexy chest hair I guess considering he was on a show about werewolves? Am I right guys? Anyway, he was introduced in the series premiere of Season 2 and made a pretty good impression. But that didn't last as he was turned into someone who the writers can shit on to prop Kara, which is a damn shame as Hoechlin could have been amazing. And they still do that to him."

As Wade talked, images of Hoechlin's Clark and Superman appeared on the screen behind him.

"Anyway, with introductions done, let's see which one of them disses and beats the other. And to make this more fun, everyone gets a unique quality I have- breaking the 4th wall!"

Everyone cheered happily at that. This had gotten so much better.

"Now without further ado, let's begin!"

Clark was soaring in the sky at full speed, wearing his Superman suit as he flew into Space before flying back into the atmosphere, causing a sonic boom. That was when he heard someone flying up behind him and slowed himself down until the person was flying next to him.

He turned his head to see Kent flying next to him, a silly but sweet smile on his face. The two exchanged a look before straightening up and hovered down towards a building.

"So you're the one I am pitted against", Clark said as he regarded Kent.

"Yeah, it's me. The Man of Steel", Kent said.

"You don't look like it", Clark said simply, looking unimpressed.

"Don't judge a book by its cover", Kent told him.

"You don't have the powerful presence I do", Clark said bluntly. "In your presence, people will feel hopeful for sure. But not safe, because you really can't convey it. Your silly smile is too much."

"Hey!" Kent said angrily. "At least I did not become a spineless idiot to enable my show into becoming a soap opera. Which is exactly what happened to you as you became spineless whenever it came to Lana."

"Wait what? Your show?" Clark asked and laughed hysterically as Kent looked embarrassed. "You don't even have your own show. Though you're about to get it, but that's a different matter. You're a character in your cousin's show, and because of that, you're supposed to play second fiddle to her. And they basically use you to prop her. They say you survived Warworld and defeated Doomsday, and 2 minutes later have Kara beat or outperform you to make it look like she can do it too and is better than you."

Kent shook with rage. "You didn't even wear the suit till the last episode! And even when you wore it, it was CGI as your actor didn't have the guts to wear tights."

"When was the last time you were useful?" Clark countered calmly. "Kara somehow beat you at your best and then stopped the Daxamite Invasion. You were supposed to read the Book of Destiny but you didn't fix everything and Deegan took it from you. You couldn't beat Earth-96 Clark and your wife had to save you. You were almost killed by the Anti-Monitor and your cousin had to save you again. You may have made a good first impression, but you certainly didn't hold up after that. And considering the state of the entertainment industry nowadays, I'm sure that even in your own show, Lois will be shown as more competent and intelligent than you at everything."

Before Kent could respond, Clark said. "And my Lois is a loving and supportive person. Yours is too but she comments on other Clarks too much for your liking."

Kent was pissed and struck a low blow. "You were ruined in the crossover! You retired even with your biggest enemy still out there and didn't react on hearing the Multiverse would be destroyed. And you didn't even get to be the legendary hero for the ages which is what the Legion described you as. And the Legion wasn't even created probably with the retcon they did."

"All of that's true, but it was done by those who write your shows, and will write your show", Clark said and Kent paled. "They ruined me in 2 minutes. Imagine how much more they will ruin you in 2 Seasons. They don't make 'em like they used to. My show got boring and soap-opery during Seasons 6 and 7 and even 8 to an extent. But it lasted 10 Seasons and still had quality and a lot of good stuff till the end. I can bet that even if your show is good to begin with, it will go downhill after Season 2 and won't ever be good again."

Kent was pissed again as Clark said. "And you're so weak. I am fast enough to go from London to Metropolis in a second and disarm a launched nuke. And let's not forget how I beat my enemies. Plus, I pushed a planet the size of Saturn out of the Solar System in my last episode. Even with my Season 5 feats, I can own you within seconds as you're much, much weaker than I am. Your flight wouldn't have saved you."

"Really? Let's do this and see who's better!" Kent roared and flew at Clark angrily at full speed.

But to someone as fast as Clark, he appeared to be moving in slow motion, though he was still moving a bit. Clark simply smirked, waiting for it.

And when Kent was close to him, Clark smacked him with the back of his hand, sending him crashing to the ground where he formed a crater. Clark then flew down to see Kent lying in the crater, his face bleeding as he groaned.

"And to think people who never watched my show thought you were a continuation of me", Clark mocked as Kent tried to get up but failed due to being too weak. "At least in Aragorn's sequel to 'Thunder and Steel', which happens to massively improve Season 1 of your cousin's terrible show, he is crossing it over with my show by having me instead of you along with several of my friends, and my backstory up until Season 7, though modified for Seasons 6 and 7. Shows how pathetic you really are."

Kent's eyes closed as he fainted due to the combination of his defeat and mockery while Clark smirked and flew off into Space.

"So there ya go people!" Wade said as all clapped at what they had just seen. "Smallville version of Clark Kent wins. It was obvious he would win even before this started. He was blessed by Christopher Reeve after all, even if he didn't wear the tights. And he is ridiculously powerful. Like he is the most powerful version of 'underwear-above-my-pants' outside of the comics."

All nodded in agreement as Wade then said. "Now let's look at the scoreboard."

Everyone looked at the glowing scoreboard.

Smallville: 1

Arrowverse: 0

"Well, there it is. Smallville wins Round 1 and proves they have the much better Man of Steel. Best one actually", Wade said as he people clapped. "Now we will see you all next time with Round 2, where two emerald archers clash!"

Everyone cheered hysterically at that, struggling to contain their excitement as Wade waved to them all and said. "See you all next time!"

And done with Chapter 1. Obviously Welling had this one in the bag no matter what way you look at it. Hope everyone enjoyed.

See you all next time where we see both the Olivers butting heads.