AN: Hey everyone. Here's a short and sweet chapter for you all. Sorry about the delay in posting this. Life is happening. Thanks for your patience!

Manhattan, June 1998

Addison stared at the TV in front of her in the living, eyes hard, searching for answers she had yet to receive. The apartment was deafeningly quiet, the only sound filling it heavy, tensed breathing it had never played witness to. She had recently been blindsided—Boston was never in the realm of her subconscious. But here was her fiancé telling her he wanted to move all the way to Massachusetts. They had fought about it, a big fight she'd rather not think about, and now it was time to talk about things like adults. She had had a bit of time to process it all—not rushing the way her mind tried to digest the big news Derek had sprung up on her. Finding that acceptance letter on the nightstand felt like a slap to the face, the wind knocked right out of her without her expecting it in the slightest. Derek was seated beside her on the futon couch, only two feet between them but it may as well have been a million miles. Never had she felt farther from Derek in heart than she did since she saw the letter.

"I didn't tell you because I didn't think I'd even get in," Derek said quietly.

She suppressed the urge to roll her eyes, instead huffed in frustration. "You said that already."

"It's the truth."

"Try again," she replied, voice hard.

Derek sighed, running a hand tiredly across his face. This was the first time Addison was willing to hear him out, really hear him in out in earnest, and he owed it to her and their relationship to be honest. To be patient. To understand why Addison wasn't jumping for joy.

"I didn't want to cause trouble when there wasn't any assurance there was going to be trouble to begin with. Harvard was a longshot, and I didn't think I had a good chance of getting in."

"So you decided not to mention it to me," she remarked flatly, not looking at him. It was taking all of her willpower not to explode yet again.

"I know it's hard to understand, Addie, and believe me, I'm just as surprised as you are. But I'm telling you the truth. I applied not really thinking much of it."

"And now you're in."

"Now I'm in," he agreed, looking away and unable to watch Addison's jaw clench, how her entire being was radiating anger she was obviously desperately trying to keep in check. He applied without really thinking about it, sure. But ever since he got in, since he qualified for an interview even, it was all he could think about.

There was another moment of tense silence, Addison breathing hard and Derek trying not to melt under the heat of Addison's wrath. And then, "Why Boston?"

"Brigham has one of the best neurosurgery fellowships in the country."

"So does Weill Cornell," she countered, a tone that left no room for question.

He shook his head. "Weill Cornell is good," he admitted carefully. "But Addie… this is Harvard we're talking about." Why couldn't she see that? If she just strained hard enough to look past the fact that he applied behind her back, she would realize that Harvard was a huge deal. Especially for someone who came from a background as modest as his.

"What does it offer that Cornell doesn't?" she challenged, also fully aware that sure, Harvard was a huge deal, but there were many fellowship programs that could offer the exact same thing as Harvard.

The chance to shine, he wanted to answer, but he couldn't. He couldn't admit he was jealous of his fianceée, that her talent far exceeded his, and that he often felt small with her around. He knew, as a partner, he should have felt nothing but pride for her. And while he did feel immensely proud, he also felt immensely pressured to keep pace, to be just as good. It was doubly hard to do so in a community where Addison was already well-known, well-liked, well-endorsed. So instead of answering, he kept his mouth shut.

Addison sighed. She chanced a withering look at him before turning her attention back to the blank TV screen. "Is it just about the prestige?" she asked, the frustration seeping into her tone.

"It's Harvard," he offered lamely, unable to come up with any other argument that could encompass all he felt.

She nodded almost imperceptibly, trying her best to stay objective. "I need to know how seriously you're considering accepting their offer," she said, hoping against hope that it was a safety school. That was a long shot, of course. Harvard could never be a safety school. But she had foolish hope in her heart that Derek wasn't seriously considering moving all the way to Boston.

"I'm… not really sure."

"Derek," she exhaled tiredly. "I'm not in the mood to beat around the bush. You want us to talk about this like adults? We will. That means you need to answer me truthfully." She turned to face him. "If I weren't in the picture, would you choose Boston?"

"Addie, that's not fair," he protested immediately.

"Not fair? You know what's not fair? My fiancé hiding this huge thing from me. My fiancé, expecting me to be understanding and patient and to just go with the flow. That's what's unfair. So me asking you whether or not I stand in between you and what you obviously want, which is Boston, isn't unfair. It's only right."

He bit his lip, feeling smaller and smaller as Addison glowered. She was right, of course. She was always right. There were so many points at which he could have told her. Ideally, he should have told her before he even applied. Before an application form waited for him in his locker like a dirty secret. And even after mailing in his application, he could have told her. When he got an interview, he could have, too. But he let everything go unsaid until the very last minute, until there absolutely no way she could have found the situation anything more than bleak.

"I ask again," she continued, oblivious to what he was thinking. "If I weren't in the picture, would you choose Harvard?"

A beat, and then a quiet, "Yes."

Addison gave a curt nod. Basically, she realized that the only thing standing between Derek and his dreams of Harvard was her, and it wasn't exactly a pretty position to be in. She wanted to yell. She wanted to throw things. She wanted to scream at him about how he had placed her in a severely compromising position so unfairly and thoughtlessly. In what world would it have been okay for anyone who loved another so consumingly to stand in the way of their aspirations? Derek hadn't been fair to her, but she had to bear the brunt of that unfairness, face and conquer an inner turmoil she hadn't even grasped fully yet.

"But it's not that simple," he said, licking his lips. "Addison, between you and Harvard, I would choose you."

"Really," she replied, voice flat and obviously unconvinced.

"I would."

"Then if that's so, why are we even having this conversation?" she challenged. "If it came right down to it, and as you said, you would choose me over Harvard, then why are you even conflicted?" She took a steadying breath. "Don't lie to me, Derek. Don't say things you think I'll want to hear. You and I both know the decision isn't that simple. And between me and Harvard? I'm not sure I would win." It was the precise reason she couldn't ask him to choose. She was fearful in the knowledge that he would definitely choose Harvard over her.

"It's not a competition," he insisted.

"I know it isn't."

"Then wha—"

"Derek. At the end of the day, you have a decision to make. I hate to make an ultimatum for you, because that isn't who I am. But I can't sit idly by while you slave over your current predicament. The way I see it, you can either get the school or the girl. I don't think you can get both."

"Why not?" he asked incredulously. "Addison, there's more than one way to make a relationship work. It isn't mutually exclusive."

"What do you propose then?"

"Move down to Boston with me," he proposed brazenly. "Move with me there and we can start fresh."

"You expect me to move to a different city?" she asked, unable to keep the disbelief from her voice. "New York is my home. Everything that matters to me is here. My friends, Archer, the hospital. This is my home," she repeated. "You expect me to pick up everything, everything, to follow you down to Boston?" She shook her head. "When have you ever known me to change my entire life for a single person, least of all a man?"

"That man you're talking about is your fiancé," Derek replied in aggravation. "Your future husband. Under different circumstances, if I were being 'reassigned' at work to a different city, wouldn't we make this decision as husband and wife? Wouldn't you have to at least consider moving?"

"Well, see, that's the thing," Addison said with an eye roll. "We're supposed to be husband and wife, but you're making a decision not as a husband, but as Derek. Just Derek."

"You wouldn't pick up your life for me?"

"Would you really ask me to?" she bit back defiantly, looking straight into his eyes.

He wavered slightly under her piercing gaze, exhaling as he averted his eyes. She was right. He wouldn't ask that of her. Shouldn't ask that of her. It's selfish. But he didn't think himself to be the most generous man, and yes, he was asking. He was asking her to change her entire life for him. He was asking Addison. Forbes. Montgomery. to change her entire life… for him. It was a forward and daring proposal, but he was clinging desperately to the tendrils of hope that would keep them together.

"Would you at least consider it?" he asked softly. "I know it's a lot to ask. I know," he pleaded. "But… Boston couldn't be that bad, right? We could get a fresh start."

"A fresh start from what?" she asked, genuinely confused. "It's not like New York has been stifling or bad to us, or that we have problems we're running away from."

He shook his head. She wouldn't understand. And he couldn't bring it up either. It would be too much.

"All I'm saying is… would you at least consider? While I think about Weill Cornell, can you think about Boston too? Can you give it real, serious thought?" He took her hands earnestly. "I know it's too much to ask. But would you at least consider it, for me?"

And she did, very seriously did. Over the next few days, she agonized over it. She tried to give Boston a fair chance, for Derek. Would she flourish in Boston? She had no doubt she would. She was built of steel and determination, and there was little doubt in her mind that she could handle Boston. But would she be happy? She would be with Derek, certainly. But was it even reasonable to anchor all her happiness on Derek's presence? Derek would make her happy, surely he would. But her entire life didn't revolve around Derek—which wasn't to say that Derek wasn't enough. But it wasn't practical nor was it fair to rest the matter of her happiness squarely on Derek's shoulders.

She loved New York. She loved the city. She loved Central Park and fashion week and Broadway and all the museums. She loved having all of her friends within a subway ride, all of her favorite cafes within a one-mile radius from their apartment. How everything was right at her fingertips. She loved the energy of the city, the people, the culture. How Archer, the only person she really considered family, was right there, and how Derek's family was within a short drive. She had no doubt that Boston could offer her different things to love, but New York was her home. And she had never, in her entire life, imagined uprooting herself from the city she loved. She thought she and Derek were on the same page about that.

And what of her career? Derek was already in; he would start fellowship even before the wedding. And her? She would have to wait a full calendar year before she could start applying for a fellowship of her own. What would she do in that year? Was she even willing to wait an entire year to get her career up and running? She could. Theoretically. She had skipped two grades and was two years younger than Derek. She could definitely afford a year off for herself. But did she want to? The prospect wasn't all too appealing.

Basically, it boiled down to this—she would move to Boston solely for Derek. Derek, the love of her life, her future husband, her family. She was so in love with him, it scared her a little. And though on the outside it seemed a worthwhile decision to move to Boston simply for Derek, somewhere in the jagged corners of her heart, it didn't feel like a convincing enough reason to do so. It didn't feel right.

It didn't feel right because moving to another city for a man was so unbecoming of her. It didn't feel right because she had every right to choose her own path and damn it, she wanted to stay in New York. But mostly, it didn't feel right because suddenly, she didn't trust him. He had made this huge decision behind her back, made a big move without telling her, and then expected her to just bend to the decision like she was a puppy who would follow him around. Boston felt like a betrayal, and she couldn't imagine moving towards a betrayal. Something that embodied the crack her trust in Derek suddenly had.

She gave it fair thought. She really and truly did, or at least tried to. But to move to Boston for Derek and only Derek? Was it even right?

Present Day

If the gods didn't hate her the day she overheard Meredith and Derek fight in the middle of the hallway, they definitely did today, when they assigned Meredith to her service. She had been conveniently let out of the OB rotation since the very public break-up, but it seemed Dr. Bailey was tired of having to adjust to people's personal lives. As was her right.

And that was how Addison found herself with Meredith by her side, making rounds on her patients. Meredith didn't seem thrilled to be on her service, which was completely understandable… and if she was honest… completely mutual as well.

"Dr. Grey—"

"Derek and I broke up," she blurted just as they exited a patient's room and Addison was about to give her instructions on the patient's care.

Addison raised a brow in confusion. Meredith seemed to have the habit of saying things without much of an introduction. She was unceremonious in her ways, which was endearing sometimes, but often threw her off kilter.

"We broke up, I'm sure you know," she continued, flustered. "I mean, the entire hospital knows. The entire hospital heard."

Unfortunately, Addison wanted to say, but she kept her mouth shut and watched the blonde struggle with her words.

"I heard you," Meredith said quickly. "In the stairwell."

"The stairwell?" she asked, feeling something like dread settle in the pit of her stomach.

She nodded, an unreadable expression on her features. "When you were yelling at Derek about how he was an ass to Dr. Tyndall, and he all but said he still loved you. I heard you."

Addison frowned, tried to keep the surprise from showing on her face. She and Derek hadn't even had the chance to discuss that. They'd been avoiding each other like the plague. "You heard that," she said dumbly.

"I did," she nodded. "And… I don't know. I didn't say anything, because I was really surprised about what I'd heard and I guess I was sort of in denial."

"Dr. Grey, why are you telling me this?" Addison asked tiredly, wanting nothing more than for this conversation to end. She pinched the bridge of her nose, hoping for a split second there was a martini in her hand to get through this talk. Her ex-fiance's ex-girlfriend had practically cornered her in the hall, and it was a sticky situation she wanted to get out of ASAP.

"I don't know," Meredith sighed. Truth be told, she didn't know why she was sharing this bit with Addison to begin with. Only that some invisible force was compelling her to talk to the redhead and set things straight. "But… I just thought you should know. That I know."

"That you know what?"

"That he still loves you," she said frankly, even though it sucked to have to say it out loud. Especially to Addison.

"I'm not sure that that's any of your—"

"No, but that's the thing. It is my business," Meredith asserted, not sure where she was finding the strength to be so forward with the woman who practically stole her boyfriend from her—not that Derek was ever truly hers. "My boyfriend literally dragged me through this semi-healthy relationship when deep down he was still in love with you. That wasn't fair."

"It wasn't," Addison agreed, trying her best not to wince. "But you should take that up with Derek, I think."

She shook her head. "I don't intend to. Because for all intents and purposes, we are just colleagues and there's absolutely nothing to say to him. But there is something to say to you."

"To me?" she asked, her brow raising slightly.

She nodded emphatically. "Yes, to you." She sighed, stuffing her hands in the pockets of her white coat and then looking straight at Addison. "Stop pretending like you're fine. You walk around the hospital as if everything is freaking fine, but they're not. And I get that that works for you—that's your defense mechanism or whatever. Good for you. But you should know that your defense mechanism is hurting people. It's hurting Derek."

"I thought you were just colleagues?" she asked with a bit of confusion.

"We are. But I care about him." She looked at Addison in the eye, a serious look on her face. "I heard you guys in the stairwell. Derek's in love with you, sure. But what I heard? Also sounded like you might still be in love with him."

"Meredith—"

"And you prancing about like nothing is wrong, completely ignoring your feelings for him, dating Dr. Tyndall, is seriously hurting him. And it's hurting you. And it has hurt me too," Meredith said. "Be fair to him, and to yourself. He would move mountains for you—"

"He moved to a different state," she answered blandly.

"And he regrets it," Meredith replied quickly. "Just… what I'm trying to say, Dr. Montgomery… Addison… this saga between you and Derek has hurt a lot of people. Me, Derek, you… eventually Dr. Tyndall. Can you maybe try to fix it? And make all the hurt worth it?"

Addison studied Meredith carefully. She was being terribly unprofessional, but Addison had to admit that the intern had a point. Not that she was ready to concede to still loving Derek (she was still battling with that, thank you very much). But it took a lot of guts for Meredith to say what she had to say. Meredith looked at her with such earnest, pleading eyes that all Addison could do was nod.

And then without another word about what Meredith had said, Addison spoke. "Mrs. Ramirez needs a stat PT/PTT. Can you get the results to me ASAP?"

Meredith blinked before she nodded, knowing it was all she was going to get out of the attending. "I'll page you when I have it."

Derek wasn't looking at where he was going as he checked his blackberry for any messages. Without warning, he bumped into someone who spilled the charts she was holding all across the floor.

"Oh, I'm so sorry," he exclaimed, pocketing his blackberry and checking to see who he had bumped into. The red hair of the woman currently picking up the charts from the ground said it all.

He immediately crouched to the ground to help her gather the charts. "I'm sorry, I wasn't looking where I was going."

Addison looked up, shrugging. "Happens to the best of us," she said, picking up another chart and piling it, offering Derek an awkward smile.

Derek studied her for a second. She still looked pristine, if a little flustered by having to crouch on the linoleum to gather her things. But she also looked tired. He longed to ask what was up, but he and Addison hadn't spoken about anything of consequence since they argued in the stairwell. Instead, he continued picking up the charts, standing aright just as Addison did and then slowly handing her what he had collected. He ignored how there was a tingle and then a sudden rush as his hands brushed hers in the process of transferring the charts.

"Why do you have so many charts?" he asked curiously.

"Bringing them to my office to review," she replied, noting how Derek wasn't clean shaven and his hair was tousled. She scrunched her nose. "You okay?"

He looked startled. "Yeah, yeah. I'm okay."

She narrowed her eyes. "That's more than a 5:00 shadow you've got there. Trying on a new look?"

He brought his hand subconsciously to his jaw. "Not really. Not purposely anyways."

She hummed in response. "Well anyway. Thanks," she said, gesturing to the charts "you know, for giving me a hand."

"No, I'm sorry for bumping into you. I wasn't watching where I was going."

She offered him a short smile, feeling her chest tighten just a tad at the longing she could see in his eyes. She wondered if her eyes betrayed her too.

"Well," he said, clearing his throat. For a moment he looked like he wanted to say something more but thought the better of it. He settled for a small smile. "I better get going."

"Yeah," she said, shaking her head as if clearing her thoughts. "Have a good day."

"You too," he replied, stepping to the right just as Addison stepped to her left.

"Oh," she replied awkwardly, stepping to let him pass just as he stepped to the same side. Their eyes met briefly, and they both seemed like they could die on the spot out of the sheer tension.

He chuckled nervously, held her by the shoulders firmly to keep her in place while he stepped around her to pass through. "Have a good day, Addison," he said as he made his way to the elevator.

Inside the elevator, he slumped visibly. That was awkward as hell. There were so many things he wanted to say to her, and not enough time to say it. Never the right time to say it, even. In between today's awkward encounter and their last fight in the stairwell, he had 1) argued with Meredith publicly, 2) broken up with her, 3) drank one too many beers trying to forget her, 4) finished a bottle of scotch one night trying to forget the other her, 5) avoided Addison and talking about anything vaguely related to the topic of them, and 6) was really just royally fucked up.

He wanted to set things right with her but he didn't know how. For starters, she was still seeing Timothy Tyndall. And she looked like she wasn't ready to talk things out with him—like she might eat his entire head from pressuring her. That's a fact he's known since they were dating. You cannot pressure Addison Montgomery into doing anything, especially when she isn't ready.

But he was itching to talk to her. To communicate. To fix what was broken after they had fought and somehow figure out a way to make things right and move forward. Not necessarily as a couple (although that was something he prayed for sincerely), but at least as a functional friendship. He missed her so much already.

Mark and Addison were in the elevator after a long day, deciding the merits of going down to Joe's for a nightcap or just going straight home. Addison was nearly wilted against the elevator wall, and Mark just looked sympathetic.

"I don't know if I have the energy, Mark," she said honestly, adjusting her purse on her shoulder. "I lost two babies today."

Mark nodded in understanding. "Losing a patient in your line of work is definitely a lot harder."

She raised a brow in question. He shrugged with a frown.

"They're babies, Red."

She sighed and then nodded. "I know. Peds is tough." Peds was definitely tough, and she wasn't even full-blown Peds at this point. She was in neonatal.

"Speaking of Peds," Mark said. "There's a peds conference happening next month. I saw the poster for it."

"Here?"

Mark nodded in confirmation. "It's their annual academy thing. Seattle Grace is hosting, I think."

"Great," Addison muttered with a roll of her eyes.

"You thinking about Matt?" he asked knowingly.

"With any luck, he might not even come," she answered, trying to sound optimistic. "He hates those conferences. And if he knows I'm here, it's unlikely he'll make an appearance."

Mark shrugged. Before he could say anything, the elevator door opened and both of them watched Derek look at the occupants of the elevator and then visibly try to suppress a sigh. At any other time, Addison would have found it annoying.

"Rough day, bud?" Mark asked with a knowing smirk.

"Just a long one," Derek replied as he stepped in.

"Well, Addie and I are thinking of heading down to Joe's if you want a drink," he offered, ignoring the daggers Addison was shooting his way at inviting Derek.

"Joe's?" Derek asked tiredly, not sounding like he was convinced it was a good idea to hang out.

Mark nodded. "The best of Seattle," he grinned. "Come on guys, we haven't gotten a drink together in ages."

Derek was considering it before Addison spoke. "Actually, I really do have to pass," she said apologetically. "I had a rough day, an early surgery tomorrow, and I really just want to hide under the covers tonight."

"You should be getting laid," Mark suggested lightly. "Hey, maybe Derek can—"

"No, Derek cannot," Derek interrupted sharply. "Derek can not."

"Cannot what?" Mark asked innocently.

"Derek can't get a drink with you either," Addison said swiftly, saving Derek's ass because she really didn't need Mark and his innuendos right now. "And I don't need to get laid. Thank you, for the concern. Truly—I'm touched. But I'm good."

"Hey, I have an idea," Mark said. "Red, how about you and I go back to your apartment to let off some steam. You know—"

"Mark." Addison replied warningly. "Do not finish that sentence."

Mark chuckled but raised his hands in mock surrender. "It was just a suggestion. I was only looking out for your welfare."

"Sure," Addison replied sarcastically, rolling her eyes. "But maybe you and Derek—"

"Derek cannot," Derek repeated, not wanting to be dragged into whatever it was Addison was about to suggest. "And Derek will not." For a moment it seemed like they were back to their usual selves—bickering and bantering and getting on each other's nerves. It seemed so natural, so organic between the three of them.

But before anyone could respond to that, the doors slid open to the ground floor. In an instant, the spell that was cast between them so quickly in the elevator was broken as soon as it came.

"Well, I'm going to head home," Addison announced, turning to kiss Mark's cheek and then Derek's. Out of habit. Surely out of habit. "Drive safely."

"Drinks next time?" Mark asked hopefully.

She nodded in promise. "Next time," she smiled.

"Drive safely, Addie," Derek reminded, smiling softly at her.

She returned the smile and then turned to walk away.

When she was a few paces away, Mark cleared his throat. "Bet you that kiss on the cheek is giving you a boner right about now."

"Stop."

"You know, you could just talk to her—"

"Good night Mark," he said with finality, shooting Mark a glare before walking towards the parking lot. Mark just shook his head and laughed. Those two needed a lot of help.

"You seem quiet," Timothy observed neutrally as Addison added a splash of milk into her tea.

"Hm?" she asked distractedly.

He shrugged, but didn't seem to mind too much. "You've been pretty quiet the past couple of days. Something on your mind?"

"No, nothing's on my mind," she smiled, trying her best to sound reassuring. There was a lot on her mind, of course. Ever since that phone call with Savvy, where the blonde helped her realize the depth of her lingering feelings for Derek, and ever since Meredith practically begged her to take Derek out of his misery, the state of her relationship with Derek was all she could think about. She tried not to let it affect work, tried not to show people how hugely affected she was by the realization that she was still in love with Derek Shepherd. But apparently, Timothy had the observation skills of a hawk. She shouldn't have been surprised.

His blue eyes narrowed suspiciously, but he didn't seem mad. "You sure? You've been pretty out of it since Dr. Grey lost it in the hallway."

"God, I forgot you were there," Addison said as she shook her head, running her fingers through her hair. She and Timothy didn't talk about the fight they had both witnessed a few weeks ago, conveniently sidestepping around the pink elephant in the room. Timothy, gracious as ever, had never even spoken of it until today.

He looked at her in amusement. "I believe she said that you dating me is sending Dr. Shepherd into… what was it?"

"A blind rage," she supplied dryly. Of course Timothy had the memory of a dolphin, too. An elephant. All the smartest animals combined. It sucked.

"Yes, that's the one," he smiled. "Would you like to tell me what that's about?" He thought he'd been very understanding by allowing Addison some space, not pushing the subject any further. He didn't even talk to her about all the rumors flying around Seattle Grace, a testament to his integrity and patience.

"Not particularly," she said frankly, stirring the contents of her teacup with an unreadable expression.

"You and Dr. Shepherd? Is that why he's been audaciously unkind?"

"I don't know," she answered unsurely. "It could be one of the reasons. But he's also always been prone to… moodiness."

Timothy hummed in thought. "I take it you know each other well."

She shrugged. "I guess I've been purposely vague about it," she said as she finished stirring her tea and then set the teaspoon down. She didn't think she had to apologize to Timothy for not being upfront about who Derek was in her life—Timothy never pressured her into sharing facets of herself she wasn't comfortable with. She supposed it was high time to be honest about it. "My ex."

"Ah," he replied, a slight glint in his blue eyes. "I may have suspected the same."

"It was a long time ago," she explained, although it wasn't really necessary.

"I should like to think so, since you've been married—"

"3 years," she interrupted unceremoniously. "Yes, it's been quite a while."

"Things didn't end very well, I presume," he said as he took his teacup to his lips. He looked at Addison with question, but without judgement. He was infuriatingly patient that way. His blue eyes looked intently but without pressure, and Addison always felt compelled to say what she felt when those blue eyes spoke volumes all on their own.

"Not very well," she admitted with a frown. "But… I'm okay. I mean, I'm not in a funk or anything. It's just also been a busy few days, but I'm fine," she smiled, aware that Timothy could see right through her, knew she was lying through her teeth.

He assessed her for a moment before he nodded, not willing to push the topic if it was clear she wasn't ready to talk about it. Things would come out at the right time, he was certain of it. Everything he needed to know just needed to simmer a little longer, and he hoped not to put undue pressure on her.

"Well," he said finally, blue eyes settling on Addison again, determined to end the topic if it made Addison visibly uncomfortable. "My Best of Seattle guide has suggested a nice little deli downtown that rivals Katz. Care to have dinner with me tonight?" he asked, flashing her a sweet smile.

A reuben sandwich sounded like a thrilling prospect, to be honest. She returned the smile after a beat, grateful for his ability to ride her cues on her unwillingness to indulge the topic any further. "I would love to."

"Thank you for your help," Derek said as both and he and Addison scrubbed out. Derek had a 32-weeker with a brain bleed, and Addison was there throughout the entire surgery monitoring the mother and the fetus.

"All in a day's work," she replied, smiling at him as she scrubbed her hands. Things were still fairly awkward between the two of them. But when it was about work, they flowed together seamlessly.

He returned the smile. "Reminds me of that time we tag-teamed on a car accident in 86th St. Do you remember that?"

She looked up, a memory of a time in residency when they were walking home from shift and there was a car accident a few blocks from their apartment surfacing in her mind. "Yeah, I remember that," she said fondly. "I was tired to the bone after we transferred them but—"

"They named their daughter after you."

She nodded. "I'm surprised you remember that."

"Honey, very few people I know are named Addison. And that little lady is only one of two."

She shook her head, ignoring Derek's slip of tongue (honey? honey?) and how that apparently commandeered a battalion of butterflies straight to her stomach. A battalion of butterflies she most definitely did not expect.

"I guess it's not a very common name," she settled, ignoring those tiny little insects and making a mental note to google how it was to kill butterflies.

"No, it isn't," he agreed. "It's unique."

"And pretentious."

He laughed, a hearty sound she hadn't heard from him in a long time. "That's Bizzy for you, isn't it?"

She smiled at him, pulling a paper towel out of the dispenser. "Yeah, Archer and Addison aren't exactly typical," she agreed. "But Carson—"

"Is not either," he interrupted with a knowing look. They had discussed names before, for theoretical children and pets and plant and every other thing they could slap a label on. Carson was always top of Addison's list.

"Hey!" she said defensively. "I just helped you out with a patient. You can't diss on a name I've liked for years now."

Carson Shepherd sounded pretty awful. And come to think of it, Carson Bradford didn't sound too appealing either. All in all, the name choice was pretty questionable.

"What?" she asked when he didn't respond.

He shook his head. "Nothing," he replied, trying to fight a smile.

"Nothing?" she glared. "I know you Derek Shepherd."

"What?" he laughed. "I'm not hiding anything."

"You are," she replied knowingly. "You have that glint in your eye that says there's more to Carson."

He shook his head on a laugh. "Fine."

"Fine what?"

"Fine, yes, there's more."

"Well, let's hear it then," she said, hand on her hip and looking at Derek expectantly.

"Mark… he uh… he gifted me with… a pet." After the break up, when he was knee deep in sorrow and in no condition to be looking after another living thing but himself.

"A pet," Addison repeated blandly.

He nodded. "And he named it Carson."

Addison scrunched up her nose. "At least tell me it was a cute dog," she said as she shook her head in amusement. Well, there goes her dream name.

"It was a hamster," he said flatly, before laughing loudly as a piece of tissue hit his head in Addison's wake.

Moments like that made him feel like it probably wasn't too late for them.

AN: I know, shorter than the previous chapters. Trying to get the last two chapters polished and ready to go! I can't believe we're down to the last two! Thanks for sticking around! Take care everyone!