Author Notes: Hello again, everyone! Warning for cracky situations and NHS' impending insanity. Enjoy :)

- Chapter Start -

Lunch was a generous selection of QingHe's famous dishes. There were only six diners, but the large rectangular table was laden with food as though Da-ge worried Er-ge and San-ge didn't have enough to eat since he last saw them.

There were platters of barbequed meats, well seasoned, spiced and grilled over an open flame. The aroma was so good even Er-ge ate a few pieces before reluctantly going back to his bland vegetables, saying he didn't want to ruin their first anniversary with an upset tummy. His words were rewarded with an approving pat on the arm by Da-ge, and a beatific smile by San-ge.

Flanked by a resigned Nie ZhongHui and a curious Mo XuanYu, HuaiSang surveyed the three sworn brothers from across the table. Ever since they confessed to also being husbands, they had been more open about showing their affection among trusted family members and friends, and of course the loyal servants of QingHe Nie.

"After Aunt Sisi gave birth, I took over the senior classes while A-Yao handled the junior ones," Er-ge said. "WangJi helped where he could, but he had his hands full with sect leader duties and chief cultivator correspondence."

"The correspondence dropped by almost half after WuXian-ge insisted on drafting replies for them," San-ge added, the glint in his eyes at odds with his demure smile. "Sect Leader Yao stopped filing complaints every week. In fact, he stopped writing completely."

Da-ge chuckled while Er-ge smiled

"I wish I could've seen Wei-xiong's replies," HuaiSang said regretfully.

"I have and can recite one or two to you, word for word," San-ge promised before giving a delicate cough. "Strictly off the record, of course."

"Excellent!" HuaiSang beamed at him. "So, are the proud parents doing well?"

He hadn't visited the Cloud Recesses when they announced the good news, but Da-ge had and so had Sect Leaders Jin and Jiang. YanLi-jie had followed her husband, leaving Jin Ling at Koi Tower under Madam Jin's watchful care. Wen Qing had stayed back at Lotus Pier as it was around her due date.

"Very well," Er-ge replied with a smile. "Uncle is eager to have you meet his son."

"Oh! Ah..." HuaiSang immediately tried to think of an excuse not to go.

"You must, HuaiSang-ge!" Mo XuanYu patted his arm. "I've seen the baby and he's very cute! He's also hungry all the time. Aunt Sisi says she's gotten used to breastfeeding him everywhere she goes. She doesn't mind me watching, but Uncle Qiren does. He chased me away."

Er-ge choked on his wine. With a hearty laugh, Da-ge patted him on the back and almost sent him face first into the steamed bok choy.

- o -

As the meal progressed and the number of empty wine jugs increased, Da-ge, Er-ge and San-ge started behaving with even less propriety. First, they mistook each other's winecups for their own. Then each other's chopsticks. And then mouths because they started feeding one another.

HuaiSang was hard pressed not to facepalm especially when he caught the knowing smirks on the attending servants' faces. He wished he had ordered them to serve fruit wine instead, but it was too late now.

A small hand patted his arm again, drawing his attention.

"Are Da-ge, Er-ge and San-ge drunk?" Mo XuanYu asked in a loud whisper. He was staring at them as he ate, absently taking one piece of meat after another. He had developed a liking for both spicy food and sweet desserts - to HuaiSang's secret delight - and the doting cooks indulged him in both each time he visited.

"Just ignore them," HuaiSang whispered back. He, on the other hand, was too nervous to eat. What had seemed like the prefect gift over the past nine months, right up to this morning in fact, now seemed... wholly inappropriate.

It would be him getting that upset tummy first.

- o -

By the time lunch was over, everyone's faces were rosy from alcohol except for Mo XuanYu who had only drunk tea. Even Er-ge forgot to neutralise the alcohol with his golden core after a while.

HuaiSang decided to present his gift before he lost his nerve completely. He had had the covered painting carried from his pavilion and placed behind a screen earlier. The only problem was that Mo XuanYu and ZhongHui were still here. One who shouldn't see the painting ever again and the other who would be happy not seeing it ever.

Pasting a smile on his face, HuaiSang turned to the former.

"A-Yu, the cooks have made-"

"HuaiSang-ge, isn't it time to present your gift?" Mo XuanYu interrupted him.

The three sworn brothers turned from patting each other's hair to looking at them.

"Gift?" Da-ge asked.

"What gift?" Er-ge asked.

"You have a gift for us?" San-ge asked.

"It's a surprise!" Mo XuanYu sang out. "But you three will love it!"

HuaiSang wanted to dig a hole in the floor and jump right in. He settled for facepalming instead.

"Second Young Master Nie," ZhongHui whispered. "What we accidentally saw that night. Surely you're not... actually...?"

Face still covered, HuaiSang nodded and didn't see ZhongHui blanch.

"But Young Master Mo seems to-"

"Could you please take him to the kitchens now?" HuaiSang interrupted him in turn.

"Right!" ZhongHui shot to his feet and went over to Mo XuanYu, almost lifting him from his chair.

"Sect Leader Nie, please excuse us. ZeWu Jun, LianFang Jun, it's good to see you two again."

"Wait! I want to see their reactions first!" Mo XuanYu protested.

"No, you don't," ZhongHui said. "No one does."

"I do!" Mo XuanYu struggled to get down, but ZhongHui had spent years wrestling with a slippery HuaiSang who was desperate to escape saber training.

"HuaiSang-ge! I wanna see their reactions. Please...!"

Biting his lower lip, HuaiSang looked down at his plate until the sound of the doors shutting signaled ZhongHui and Mo XuanYu's exit. He would make it up to his future partner later.

Maybe they could have a picnic in one of the inner gardens. Then he remembered his dream this morning and made a face.

Maybe they could paint something instead. Although given what Mo XuanYu had seen earlier, that wasn't a good idea either.

Maybe they could-

"HuaiSang?" A tap on his head made him look up to see Da-ge settling back in his seat with an expectant look.

"Right," HuaiSang mumbled. Best to get it over with. "A-Ming, A-Won, please bring the, uh... item from behind that screen. The stand as well."

"Of course, Second Young Master Nie."

As the two servants carried over the covered painting and easel, the three sworn brothers exchanged looks of curiosity.

"A painting?" Da-ge asked.

"It must be," Er-ge said.

"A portrait of the three of us?" San-ge guessed.

"In a manner of speaking," HuaiSang hedged. "Happy Anniversary!"

"HuaiSang, you know you needn't give us anything," Da-ge said but he looked very pleased.

"It's very considerate of you," Er-ge said with a wide smile.

"We're sure to treasure it," San-ge promised.

Da-ge motioned for A-Ming and A-Won to unwrap the painting.

"Wait!" HuaiSang burst out. "Uhm, I'll do that. You two may leave now."

He waited until they left the dining hall before getting up to stand behind the painting. Pulling free the ties on the dust sheet, he looked at the three men who stared expectantly back at him.

"Do you remember when Wei-xiong and I called you three out at the Cloud Recesses?" He asked.

They nodded.

"Do you remember me saying ZhongHui and I had peeped into Da-ge's bedroom during your previous visit then?"

They nodded again.

"And how I was inspired to paint?"

They nodded a third time, six eyebrows drawing together to form three suspicious frowns.

"So this is the surprise we've been asking you about over the past nine months?" San-ge asked, mind still sharp as a tack despite his flushed cheeks.

With a nod and a deep, fortifying breath, HuaiSang pulled off the dust sheet and let it fall to the floor behind him.

The three pairs of eyes before him widened in shock and as one, their owners stood up. HuaiSang took a judicious step back as they crowded the painting.

"This is what you saw that night?!" Da-ge roared, face turning a dull red.

"You and ZhongHui?!" Er-ge wailed, face turning a shade of white that rivaled his forehead ribbon.

San-ge opened and closed his mouth with only a mortified squeak coming out.

"It's a good likeness, wouldn't you say?" HuaiSang asked weakly. "Uh... please don't be mad or anything!"

He stopped breathing when Da-ge raised a trembling hand towards the painting, only to let it fall back to his side midway.

"Da-ge?" HuaiSang asked.

"It's beautiful," Da-ge said, his voice deeper than usual. Then he smiled at HuaiSang, dimples flashing in both cheeks. "Thank you, didi."

HuaiSang almost sagged to the floor in relief. He started breathing again.

"It is beautiful," Er-ge agreed and smiled as well, although his face was now a deep pink. "I never imagined..."

"HuaiSang, you are far more talented than you think," San-ge praised, his face as pink as Er-ge's.

"Thank you!" HuaiSang's knees were decidedly shaky. "Well then. You three just need to decide where to hang it."

"My bedroom, where else?" Da-ge declared and turned to his two husbands. His eyes were glittering. "In fact, we should do that now."

"Yes. We should." Er-ge nodded, licking his lips as his eyes raked Da-ge's muscular form from head to foot.

"I know just the spot," San-ge said, sounding just a bit breathless. He was also staring at Da-ge.

HuaiSang gulped and pulled the easel back a few feet. For safety reasons.

"You three do that. Meanwhile, I think I'll... uh, I'll go look for A-Yu. Before he, you know, eats all the sweet buns."

- o -

Two hours later...

The stone fortress and barren mountains of QingHe could never rival the cool and serene beauty of Gusu, the warm and lake filled lands of Yunmeng or the golden glitter of Lanling. Still, HuaiSang had done his best to maintain the three gardens his mother had started. One was filled with beds of exotic flowers brought in from elsewhere and cultivated by half a dozen gardeners. One had a koi pond, a small bridge over it and a tiny gazebo. The third one had a few fruit trees amid a sizable plot of lush grass.

HuaiSang and Mo XuanYu sat in the gazebo overlooking the koi pond with a picnic basket at their feet. Mo XuanYu had removed his shoes and brought his legs up so he could rest his chin on his knees.

"You never let me have any fun," he accused, lower lip sticking out in a pout.

"You already have plenty of fun wherever you go," HuaiSang retorted back.

The boy's pretty looks and winning manners - both acquired from his mother of course - charmed everyone he met. It was a wonder he wasn't more spoiled. HuaiSang gave all the credit to Madam Mo whom he had visited a few times. He still blushed at the memory of the first time they met. Mo XuanYu had pulled him into their home by the hand, shouting, "A-Niang, come meet the man I'm going to marry!"

"But I wanted to see their reaction to your beautiful painting."

"Yes, well." HuaiSang grimaced a bit. "I'm still alive as you can see."

"Why would they kill you?" Mo XuanYu asked in surprise. "They should be pleased."

"They are," HuaiSang assured him.

"So what happened after that?" Mo XuanYu asked, his curiosity winning over his sulkiness.

"They thanked me and I left. I don't know what happened after that."

He had a pretty good idea though. Apparently, Er-ge and San-ge wanted to reenact what they had done in the painting because they had pushed a half protesting Da-ge into the nearest chair and got to work.

Two seconds later, his boots had gone flying, one of them almost hitting HuaiSang in the head who abandoned his painting and rushed to the doors. When he had turned around to close them, he saw them in the same position as his painting. Da-ge with his head flung back and his robe skirts pushed up while Er-ge and San-ge were bent over his groin. Gulping, HuaiSang had pressed the lock on the doors before pulling them shut, locking the dining hall from the inside.

Shaking off the memory, he lifted the basket onto the stone seat of the gazebo.

"Anyway, enough of that. Look, cook made your favourite egg custard buns!"

Smiling, Mo XuanYu took one. HuaiSang took one too. The rest of the afternoon went by very pleasantly.

At dinnertime, HuaiSang wasn't surprised when A-Ming reported that Sect Leader Nie, ZeWu Jun and LianFang Jun were having dinner in Da-ge's rooms. It wasn't until he saw A-Ming's smirk that he remembered Da-ge wanting to hang the painting in his bedroom. Which meant that by tomorrow morning, every single servant would not only know about it, but would have viewed it with their own eyes!

Groaning in mortification, HuaiSang vowed to stick to painting Mother Nature from now on.

- Story End -

A/N: Thank you for reading! Please leave a comment if you enjoyed it :)