Chapter 67: Clarke

Lexa amazes me every day, and every day I fall deeper and deeper in love with her. Today was no different. I saw how her face lit up at the ultrasound. If I had to guess, she would prefer that I had the baby, although she would never say it. I can just tell by the way she looked at the image and called it a gummy bear. Then she came up with a brilliant plan that would allow the baby to have both of our DNA's if it works.

We are now headed back to the hotel for our adventure with Asher, and I feel better than I have in a long time, and it's because I have hope. Hope that Lexa has instilled in me, and I now can better understand what she said about hope and how having it makes things easier. I just hope that we can figure out how to do the procedure, but I'm leaning towards keeping the baby anyway, even if we don't.

I glance over at Lexa, and she is typing away on her phone. If I had to guess, she's emailing Julian and Ash and then texting them as well. Once she has something on her mind, she doesn't let it go until she gets what she wants. I look over at mom, and she's also deep into something on her phone. I clear my throat and say, "Mom, would you like to see the ultrasound picture?"

She looks up, "Of course I do! I wasn't sure if you would go ahead with the ultrasound since you aren't sure if you are keeping it or not, but I'm glad you did. Where is it?"

Lexa reaches into her pocket and pulls it out, smiling, "Here you go, take a look at the little gummy bear."

Abby smirks, "Gummy bear, huh?"

"Yes, that is what Lexa is calling it," I say with a laugh and look over at Lexa, who is smiling from ear to ear like a proud parent. That is when I realize that she has already fallen in love with it. I feel tears in my eyes, and I know that I have to keep it no matter what. It doesn't matter how it was conceived, it is already loved, and that is what matters the most, right. But what if we can't merge the DNA, and it resembles Finn? Will I be able to handle that?

Suddenly Lexa wraps me in a hug bringing me out of my thoughts. "Clarke, what's wrong? Why are you crying?"

"It's just…just the way yours and mom's face lit up looking at the picture of the gummy bear. You looked like a proud parent showing off the picture of their baby when you handed it to mom, and she looked like a proud grandparent and…."

Lexa stops me, "Babe, I'm sorry…I don't mean to. I know this is hard for you and you haven't decided what you want to do. But, I promise, either way, I am here for you, and I support your decision."

I looked between mom and Lexa, "I know you will, sweetie. I think I've made up my mind." I pause, taking a deep breath.

Lexa says, "You don't have to make any decisions yet. You have time."

"I know, but…I've decided to keep it, even if we can't perform the procedure. I didn't want to have a baby like this, but sometimes life surprises us, and if I don't have this baby, who's to say I'll ever have another one? When is going to be a better time? And it is MY child, regardless of how it was conceived. If we'd used a sperm donor, we wouldn't know what kind of person he was, and we wouldn't even think much about it. Plus, Finn wasn't always like that. There was a time when he was actually good and caring."

I can tell Lexa is trying not to smile. "I think we can make it work, either way, experiment or not," Lexa says. "We're gonna love this little gummy bear, like crazy."

"I'm a little afraid that I'm just doing what he would want by having it, that he will be pleased when he finds out that I am having his baby, but I have decided that I can't worry about that. This is about what I want to do."

"I'm quite sure this isn't what he had in mind when he raped you. He wanted to hurt not only you but me as well. His plan was to break you and make it so that you wouldn't want anyone ever again, and, in his mind, he was ruining you for me, which is ridiculous. There is nothing that anyone could do to make me not want to be with you. When he sees you and realizes that you're happy and bringing a new life into the world…he will be either extremely disappointed or very pissed. Either way, I will deal with him, and he will never have any claim to this baby. He just wanted to hurt us, but he ended up inadvertently giving you this amazing gift. To see you raising and loving this child is going to piss him off."

"Well, I don't care how he feels. I'm doing this because it's what I want." I smile at mom then look back at Lexa. "We're having a baby."

"Are you sure this is what you really want? To have a baby with me."

"More than anything in the world." I pat my belly. "I think it would want it too. I think it would love to have two moms instead of just a mom and a Lexa."

Lexa places her hand over the baby, smiling tenderly. "I would love to have you two as my family, more than anything in the world." Lexa then looks over to mom and says, "Abby, we're having a baby! You're going to be a grandma, again."

Lexa

I wrap Clarke into a tight hug, relief flooding through me. It feels good to see Clarke happy, and now I don't have to feel bad about falling in love with the baby during the ultrasound. It is going to be born, and it would need lots of love.

"Don't tell anyone yet, okay?" Clarke says, hugging me closely. "I still need to decide when and how to tell everyone."

"What? You mean…I have to keep this a secret? Clarke…" I whine.

Clarke pulls out of the hug and looks at me, "Just for a while, until we figure everything out."

"Fine, my lips are sealed. So, since you are having our baby, does that mean you are moving in with me permanently? I mean, you're gonna need someone to run out and buy ice cream when you start craving it in the middle of the night."

Clarke looks over to Abby, who just nods. "I think that would be a great idea. I will need your support during the pregnancy, and I know I'll need your help after the baby gets here. Like I said, this is our baby."

"Yes, ma'am, and I'm going to love the hell out of the little gummy bear. I can't believe this is happening! We're having a baby!"

Abby and Clarke were hugging and laughing. "Hey, you two, what's so funny?"

Abby says, "You are."

"Huh? What am I doing?"

Clarke says, "You're just being you. You always know what I need, and seeing you this excited…lets me know that I am making the right decision."

Abby speaks, "I couldn't agree more. The two of you are going to make great mothers."

Suddenly, the door to the van opens, and Ali says, "Sorry to interrupt, but we're at the hotel. I will see you after lunch to take you to meet your buggy tour."

"Thank you, Ali."

As much as I was looking forward to this adventure with Asher, all I really wanted to do was snuggle and make love to my girlfriend. On the elevator, I look a Clarke and say, "How are you feeling? You don't have to go this afternoon if you don't feel like it."

She chuckles, "I actually feel better than I have since everything happened. But, of course, I want to go. It sounds like a blast."

"I'm glad you are happy because I can't contain my happiness. But, um…is bouncing around the desert on a dune buggy…uh, is it safe for the baby?"

"Cielo, it's fine. The only thing I can't do right now is drink."

"Oh, okay. I'm going to order room service for lunch. Are you craving anything in particular?"

"Nope, I'll take a sandwich and a salad. Do you mind if I take a shower? I feel kinda dirty after the pelvic exam and then having the ultrasound goo on me."

"No, go ahead. I'm just going to check my emails."

While Clarke showers, I get on the laptop and check my emails. There is one from Julian saying that he was able to contact Ash, and she'll be calling me within the hour. I look at the time stamp on the email, and it was from a half-hour ago. So that means she should be calling me anytime now. I need to ask Clarke if I can tell Ash what is going on because I'm sure she will have questions.

I knock on the bathroom door, "Clarke…."

"Yeah."

"I received an email from Julian saying that Ash is going to call me. Would it be okay if I tell her about the baby? She's going to have questions about why I want the doctor's notes."

"Okay, just make sure she doesn't tell Callie. I want to figure out how to tell everyone."

About five minutes later, my phone rings with a number I don't recognize. "Hello."

"Lexa, it is good to hear your voice," Ash says. "Julian said you needed to talk to Dr. Anny Stenbeck about her research, and he made it sound urgent. What is going on?"

"Do you have time to talk? It is going to take a little bit to explain everything."

"Yes, this is a secure line."

"Alright, well…I don't remember if I told you or not, probably not because she didn't want anyone to know. But a little over three months ago, Clarke was raped by Finn. It was before we were together but after she had broken up with him. We found out today that she is pregnant with his child even though she took the emergency contraceptive." I take a deep breath.

"Lexa, why didn't you tell me?"

"We were in a complicated place, and she didn't want anyone to know." I go on to explain what I need and the theory behind it.

She listens intently to the entire conversation and then says, "You said you are in Dubai. Why?"

"I'm fighting Jewel again on Saturday. Why?"

"I need to get Anny out of the country, and I thought we could come to you since it's only a six-hour flight from here in Kyiv to Dubai. Besides, if you are serious about going through with the procedure, it would be better if Anny were there to help, and I can go over everything I have learned with you."

"When can you come? I can send Morrigan and Lincoln with the plane. Just tell me when."

"What plane?"

"Long story, I'll tell you later."

"I don't meet up with my new contact until next Monday, so I can be ready whenever."

"Alright, I have an Asher adventure in a little while but should be finished by about five. So if we leave here at six, that would get us there by around midnight and then back in Dubai by at least seven in the morning. Does that work for you?"

"Yes, we will be ready."

"Thanks, Ash. The plane will be registered under AST Enterprises. I will see you around midnight."

When I hang up, I see Clarke standing at the door. "I have great news! Ash is bringing Dr. Anny Stenbeck here. I'm going to take the plane to Kyiv after our dune buggy adventure to get them."

"I'm going with you."

"I would rather you stay and rest, babe. I'm not even getting off the plane. We will land, let them come aboard, and then come straight back. I will be back before you wake up in the morning. Plus, I was kind of hoping you could keep Asher so that I can surprise Ash by taking Callie so they can have some alone time."

"Fine, I'll see if Sabrina can stay too. It will give me some practice with kids." Clarke says with a smirk.