Time seemed to stand still that night. Lucas couldn't sleep as his worried thoughts dwelled on the seven-year-old son he had out there, somewhere.
'God, please,' he prayed, 'Don't take him, too. I can't lose him, too…'
Finally, the first rays of sunlight peeked over the horizon. Lucas set out for the stage stop, hoping Tessa would arrive early; praying she would bring his son.
When he arrived, Lucas was greeted by the new manager as the man walked out of the barn.
"Ah, Mr. McCain, I was wondering when you would get here."
"You've been expecting me?"
"Sure. A pretty little lady stopped by last night and said you'd be coming by. She asked me to give you this."
Lucas accepted the envelope the man offered him and proceeded to tear it open.
"Will you be joining us for breakfast?"
"No. …No thank you."
"Always welcome if you change your mind. Have a good day!"
As the elderly man walked away, Lucas continued to study the paper in his hands. There was no note, no instructions; only a crudely drawn map with a destination circled. Shoving the page into his pocket, Lucas turned Razor around and kicked him into a gallop.
His legs swung back and forth as he sat on the porch, waiting. Mark again looked to the horizon, only to be met by the same view he'd seen a hundred times that morning. What if she had been wrong? What if his pa wasn't coming?
The questions brought tears to the boy's eyes. He was afraid of being alone. He was afraid of not having his pa. And while he couldn't have put his feelings into words, the child was afraid of not being loved.
Mark looked up one last time, springing to his feet as he saw the figure in the distance. Wiping the tears from his cheeks, the boy ran from the porch, needing no more than a silhouette to recognize his pa's frame.
"PA! PAAA!"
The small voice brought tears to the father's eyes as he jumped down from his horse and ran to meet his son. Lucas fell to his knees and pulled Mark into his arms, a wave of relief washing over him.
"Oh, Mark…" He kissed his son over and over again, finally cupping the boy's tear-stained face in his hands. "Are you alright? Are you hurt?"
Mark shook his head as his small hands tightened their grip on Lucas's shoulders. He again sank into his father's embrace, bursting into tears once more.
"It's alright; I'm here now… I'm here…"
"P-Pa…"
"Shh…" Lucas again placed a kiss on top of his son's head. "It's over now… it's all over..."
Mark buried his head into his father's neck, taking comfort in the arms tightly wrapped around him. Tears slipped down Lucas's cheeks as his son trembled in his arms. He continued to whisper into Mark's ear, assuring him that he was safe and that everything was going to be alright.
In time, the little boy pulled back, placing a hand on both sides of his pa's face as he rested his forehead on Lucas's. The father looked deep into his child's eyes, seeing something he couldn't quite identify.
"…What is it?"
"Pa, I… I don't… I don't ever want to be away from you."
A sad smile crossed Lucas's face as he again pulled Mark into his arms. "I'm here, Mark. I'm here and I'm not going anywhere. I love you and I won't ever let you go." Picking his son up, the man stood, his eyes settling on the small shack a few yards away. "…Son, the woman that took you… do you know where she is?"
"No… she… she unlocked the door and said you were gonna come and… and then she left." Mark watched as his pa's gaze fell on the horizon. "…You… you're not gonna leave me, are you?"
Lucas slowly looked back down into his son's tear-filled eyes. "No, Mark. …We've been apart far too long."
That evening, Lucas carried a sleeping Mark to the bedroom before changing His clothes and tucking the boy into bed. He threw Mark's shirt over a chair, confused to see an envelope with his name fall on the floor. Bending down to pick it up, Lucas tore the letter open and began to read.
Dear Lucas,
Saying I'm sorry seems so meaningless after everything I put you and your son through, but I need to say it. I never intended for things to turn out this way; all I was trying to do was protect my brother.
I'm sure you don't understand why I acted the way I did, and I'm not saying I was right. But of the three people who believed me, Paul was the only one who acted on it. I felt it was my fault he was in prison, even though I knew he deserved to be there. Enough lives had already been destroyed because of that fateful day. I didn't want Paul's to be another. I didn't want Peter to grow up without a father. I didn't want Hannah to be without a husband. I thought he only acted on my behalf- I didn't want to believe he could be a danger to anyone else. But he was. The things he told me as we rode from Oklahoma to Arkansas, the things he did, made me realize how much my brother had changed in the past twenty years and how little I truly knew him.
I was telling the truth when I said I took Mark to protect him. I was afraid of what Paul might do if he got his hands on the boy, and my fears were not unfounded. But I can't say that's the reason I kept him, and for that, I'm sorry. I locked you up because I needed to protect myself. I know I was wrong in helping Paul escape. I know my dearest friend is dead because of my actions. But I spent fifteen years locked up in a place for something I didn't do. I endured fifteen years of what can only be described as pure torture because no one listened. I can't go back. I won't go back. And that's why I had to make you wait.
Forgiveness is not something I dare expect, but I hope that one day you will understand. I never had any intention of harming your son, but I realize how much I did hurt both of you. No child should have to see the things Mark saw. No parent should have to face the fear of never seeing their child again. I'm sorry I caused so much pain, and I understand if after reading this, you still have every intention of tracking me down. But I had a reason. A reason you deserved to know.
—Tess
Two weeks later, Lucas stepped out of the church-turned-courthouse with his hands on Mark's shoulders.
"Son, I want you to know I'm proud of you for testifying like you did today. I know it wasn't easy."
"…You think that man was sorry for what he did?"
"…I don't know. I reckon that's between him and the Almighty."
Mark suddenly stopped walking, resulting in his pa bumping into him. Lucas looked down at his son, confused by the look on the boy's face.
"What's wrong?"
Mark slowly lifted his hand, pointing to a grove of trees in the distance. Finally realizing what his son was pointing at, Lucas patted him on the shoulder.
"Go on to the office and wait for me."
"…But… Pa…"
Lucas knelt down beside Mark, looking deep into his eyes. "I'll be right behind you, I promise."
"…Yes sir."
After sending the boy off, Lucas started towards the tree line, a firm grip on his rifle.
"…You won't be needing that," her voice called.
"Tessa, what are you doing here?"
Several moments passed before the woman answered. "…I thought nothing could be worse than going back. I thought anything… even a life on the run, would be better."
"…But?"
"But I'm not my brother and I… I can't live with this guilt. …Yes, he was the one person that acted… but in trying to save him… I betrayed the two others that believed me… the two that kept me going all those years. I… Lucas, I never meant for any of this to happen! Now Hannah's dead and-"
"And the person responsible is going to hang for it."
She slowly turned and looked up at him. "…What?"
"You're right, Tess. You aren't your brother. You're not the one who killed Hannah."
"But if I hadn't-"
"No, you shouldn't have helped him escape. But there's no changing that and there's no changing that he's the one who killed her. As for me and Mark… like you said… you were trying to protect him."
"I'm trying to turn myself in! Don't you understand?!"
"I understand more than you will ever know. …I understand that you're trying to exchange an internal pain for an external pain… and I understand that it's not the right answer."
"You're a deputy! You have to arrest me!"
"Not as of eight o'clock this morning. …And as far as I know, there aren't any warrants out for your arrest."
"But…"
"…You've served your time, Tess. Hannah wouldn't want you wasting your freedom on guilt. I don't want you wasting your freedom on guilt."
"Lucas…"
"Do you really think you're going to out-argue the father of a seven-year-old?"
A faint smile appeared on the woman's face as she looked up into his kind eyes. "…Thank you… for everything."
"We'll be in Hot Springs for the next few weeks. If you need anything… you know where to find me."
"…Lucas… why did you believe me? I could hardly get anyone to listen, let alone believe what I said."
"…I knew you too well."
"What are you talking about? Before the fire, we hardly knew each other's names."
The man rubbed his chin, glancing down before letting out a short chuckle. "…You may not have known mine, but I certainly knew yours. That was my last year of school… and I spent most of it watching you. Watching you return a silver dollar that fell out of a stranger's pocket… watching you cry as you explained to our teacher that you accidentally saw someone's paper during a test… watching you help the elderly folks in town. …And the Tessa I got to know that year wouldn't have set fire to the church."
"If it hadn't been for you and Hannah… if it hadn't been for all those letters… I don't think I would have survived."
"But you did… and you're only a reason away from reclaiming the life that was taken from you. …Find it, Tess… find your reason."
She nodded, her eyes thanking Lucas once more before she mounted up and rode away. He stood watching after her, a voice behind him suddenly breaking the silence.
"You know, I did some checking on that supposed husband she told you about," Amos began. "They let her out of the asylum, but she sure didn't get married to any groundskeeper."
"I know."
"You know? Well then why did you let her-"
"She had her reason," Lucas answered, his gaze still set on the horizon. "…And I don't need to know what it was."
The End
Thank you all for the comments and support for this story, as well as my others. I wanted to let my regular readers know that this is going to be my last story for a while. Having written 12 stories in the last 12 months, I'm starting to face a little bit of "writer's burn-out." Instead of trying to force the process, I want to take a break for a few months so I can come back with fresh ideas and a re-kindled passion for writing. If you would like to be notified when I start posting again, you can either follow my account or PM me and I will shoot you a message when I have my next story done.