WARNING: THIS SERIES CONTAINS VULGAR LANGUAGE, MASSIVE VIOLENCE, AND NOW SEXUAL THEMES WHICH WILL BE USED THROUGHOUT THE SERIES. VIEWER DISCRETION IS ADVISED!
Brandon G: Last Time On Happy Tree Friends: Survivor, Romance Is In The Air With Nutty And Lammy. At The Challenge, Pierce Begged An Alliance With Sniffles And Toothy, But He Didn't Actually Beg. And Tempers Flare Between Splendid And Yoyo. Due To The Battle Cats' Poor Teamwork, The Guardian Angels Overcame All Odds To Win The Challenge. And At The Tribal Council Ceremony, Splendid Found Out He Is Faster Than The Speed Of Light, but Slower Than A Cannonball, And He Was The Next Contestant To Get Killed. Who Will Be Killed Next? Find Out Tonight When Episode 3 Of HTF Survivor starts Right Now!
(Survivor Intro Theme From Season 1 Plays)
Graphic: 30 Castaways
(Shows Footage Of First 10 Contestants In Various Situations [Cuddles, Giggles, Toothy, Lumpy, Petunia, Handy, Snowers, Josh, Ale, And Sammy])
Graphic: Marooned
(Shows Footage Of 10 More Contestants In Various Situations [Flippy, Flaky, Krazy, Disco Bear, Lammy, Mime, Russell, Truffles, Nutty, And Skaggles])
Graphic: 56 Days
(Shows Footage Of The Last 10 Contestants In Various Situations [Lifty, Shifty, Mole, Pop, Splendid, Yoyo, Gillian, Pranky, Pierce, And Sniffles])
Graphic: One Survivor
Logo: Happy Tree Friends Survivor: Deadly Games
(Intro Ends And We Go Back To The Show)
(Fades Up To The Battle Cats' Cabin)
Graphic: Day 4
Truffles: GOD DAMN IT ALL TO HELL!
Mole: What Seems To Be The Problem, Truffles.
Truffles: I CAN'T BELIEVE MY FORMER GF IS DATING A CANDY LOVING FREAK! ALSO, MY HAT GOT STOLEN! WHO STOLE IT?!
(Truffles's Video Diary)
Truffles: First Off, I Can't Believe Nutty Has A Relationship With My Former Girlfriend Lammy, And Second Off, If I Find That Person Who Took My Hat, He Or She Will Pay For This!
(End Of Diary)
Russell: Yar, Take A Chill Pill Matey. It's Just A Hat.
Truffles: It's More Than A Hat, It Is My Prized Possession.
Lifty: Don't Look At Me. (Turns To Shifty And Winks)
Shifty: Hehehe.
(Lifty And Shifty's Video Diary)
Lifty: To Tell You The Truth, We Took Truffles Hat. Why? Because We Are Thieves. That's Why.
Shifty: Do Not Ask Why We Did It, Because We Don't Waste Our Time Saying Why We Steal Things.
(End Of Diary)
Yoyo: Truffs, You Need To Calm Down.
Gillian: Yeah, We Know That Someone Took Your Hat. Now Can We Just Leave It As It Is.
Truffles: FINE, I'LL TRY TO FIND IT MYSELF!
(Truffles' Video Diary)
Truffles: Honestly! I'm All Right Pissed Off Enough After Lammy Broke Up With Me, And Why Did I Even Sign Up For This Stupid Show Anyways?! Why Am I Wasting My Time Asking These Questions That Nobody Even Cares About?!
(End Of Diary)
(At The Other Cabin)
Petunia: So Pop, How Is Your Son Doing?
Pop: He Is Doing Just Fine. He Is Spending Time With His Mom On A Trip With Brandon's Wife And Youngest Daughter Lily.
Nutty: Where Are They Heading?
Pop: Somewhere Up North.
Cuddles: North Where?
Pop: North Carolina.
Petunia: But Pop. North Carolina Is A State In The Mega Man Chronicles Dimension Not The Happy Tree Friends World.
Pop: You Realize That The United States Of America Is Still A Thing In HTF Land, It's Just Not As Dynamic As In The MMC World
Petunia: (Pause) Oh Yeah
(Pop's Video Diary)
Pop: My Son Means Everything To Me. Cub, If You Are Watching This, Daddy Will Give You A New Toy Once He Wins, And To Lily, If You Are Also Watching This, I Hope You Enjoy Yourself With Your New Boyfriend In The Future.
(End Of Diary)
Giggles: It's Really Nice That You Have A Son. How Old Is He?
Pop: He's 5. Pretty Much The Same Age As Lily Germain Is.
Giggles: Oh So Brandon Germain's Youngest Daughter And Your Son Are In A Relationship? Man, Child Sex Has Hit A New All Time Low.
(Giggles Video Diary)
Giggles: I Wish I Met Pop's Son And Brandon's Youngest Daughter. I Don't Know What They Look Like, But My Gut Instinct Says They Will Be Really Cute When I First See Them.
Ryan S (Backstage Personnel Offscreen): Um, You Already Met Them Before, Remember Love Bites Episode 4 "The Toothed And The Bowed"?!
Giggles: Hey, I Didn't Ask You To Chime In From The Peanut Gallery, Try Raising That Kid On Your Own For Once, Oh Wait You Don't Even Have A Girlfriend Anyways!
Ryan S (Backstage Personnel Offscreen): Hey, I Already Have A Girlfriend In Cuddy And We Are Nowhere Near Close To Doing That! So, Please End This Right Now Before You Embarrass Me Even More!
Giggles: Uhh! Fine!
(End Of Diary)
(At The Cafe)
Pierce: Hey Austin, Do You Have Any Tacos?
Austin C: Who Do You Think I Am, George Lopez? That Will Cost You 3 Dollars.
Pierce: (Checks His Pockets) CRAP! I Don't Have Any Cash. (Thinks) Hmm...
(Pierce's Video Diary)
Pierce: So I Don't Have Any Cash. Big Deal! I Already Know An Easy Way To Get Some Green Papers.
(End Of Diary)
Pierce: Yo Couz Flaky! Give Me Your Money!
Flaky: No Way. Can You At Least Ask Nicely?
Pierce: How About This? (Grabs Flaky And Strangles Her) Give Me Your Money Or Your Dead Meat!
Flaky: OWW! STOP IT! Here, Just Take It. (Gives Pierce Her Money)
Pierce: Next Time I See You, You Better Bring Me More.
Flaky: Why Don't You Pick On Someone Your Own Size!
(Flaky's Video Diary)
Flaky: I Hate My Cousin Pierce! He Is A Total Ass! It's Not Fair That He Has To Pick On Me And All Of My Friends That Are Smaller Than Him.
(End Of Diary)
Disco Bear: Hey Flakes. What Seems To Be The Problem?
Flaky: My Cousin Pierce Strangled Me And Took My Money.
Disco Bear: (Gasp) That Jackass Is Related To You, And Did He Hurt You?
Flaky: A Little.
Disco Bear: OH MY GOSH! He Can't Hit On My Girl! One Of These Days I'm Actually Going To Show Him What For!
(Disco Bear's Video Diary)
Disco Bear: What Kind Of A Monster Is Pierce?! It's One Thing To Strangle A Girl Like Flaky, But To Be Strangled By A Person That Is Related To You?! That Is Very Abusive, Especially To A Family Member! Just Imagine Adam Pierce Doing The Same Thing To Molly Thorn While Jared Vous Revenge After What Happened.
Molly T (Backstage Personnel Offscreen): Um, Hello?! Do You Not Know My Backstory At All?!
Disco Bear: You Told It To Flippy Not Me
(End Of Diary)
Flippy: Hey Guys… OH DEAR GOD FLAKY! WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU!
Flaky: My Cousin Pierce Strangled Me And Took My Money.
Flippy: Flaky! That's Terrible! Are You Alright?!
Flaky: I'm Fine, Flippy. Don't Worry. (Makes An Angry Face) I Will Get Him Back In No Time.
Flippy: I Wish You Best Of Luck.
(Flaky's Video Diary)
Flaky: Pierce Will Never See It Coming Once I Get Him Back.
(End Of Diary)
(At The Forest)
Brandon G: Morning Contestants. I Have Good News And Bad News.
Skaggles: What's The Good News?
Brandon G: The Good News Is That There Will Not Be A Tribal Council Ceremony Tonight.
Tree Friends: YYYAAAYYY!
Lifty And Shifty: What's The Bad News? ... WAIT, DON'T TELL ME THAT THERE IS GOING TO BE...
Brandon G: Yep, There Will Be 2 Tribal Council Ceremonies Tonight. One For Each Of You Teams.
Tree Friends: AWW!
Skaggles: YOU GOT TO BE FUCKING KIDDING ME!
Giggles: But Why?
Brandon G: Why? Because Germain 3:16 Said So. That's Why.
Petunia: You Know You're Not Steve Austin Right, And What About The Challenge?
Brandon G: Oh I Re-scheduled It. Besides, I Just Came To Say That Your Parents Called And They Said That They Love You And They Wish You The Best Of Luck.
Giggles: THEY DID?! (Stares At The Camera) MOMMY! DADDY! I LOVE YOU TOO! BUY ME A PONY WHEN I GET HOME!
(At Giggles House)
Mary (Giggles Mom): Seriously, Why Did You Have To Get Up In The Camera Like All That, I Wish Our Daughter Wasn't Such An Attention Whore.
Jerry (Josh's Dad): But Honey, Isn't She Adorable When We See Her Waving At Us On National T.V? How Come You Don't Like Her?
Mary (Giggles Mom): CAUSE SHE JUST WANTS TOO MUCH ATTENTION, THAT'S WHY!
Jerry (Josh's Dad): Honey, She's Only 17 And Has A Boyfriend Who's Very Popular, And Has A Daughter Who Looks Just Like Her. She'll Change When The Competition Gets Down To The Nitty-gritty. Now If You Excuse Me, I Need To Go Back To Painting The Poster For The Upcoming Mega Man Chronicles Faraway Movie On My Computer.
(Back At Camp)
Brandon G: I Don't Think Your Mom And Dad Will Know That You Are Talking To Them Giggles.
Giggles: Were Not On Live T.V?
Brandon G: Nope, But We Are Broadcasting On GBS Though, So You Can Consider That As Live TV, Although This Is A Cartoon.
Giggles: T_T
Cuddles: Can We At Least Do A Challenge?
Brandon G: Sorry.
Ale: But I'm Already Pumped Up For The Next Challenge.
Brandon G: Well, Now That I Think Of It, We Had Challenges The Past Two Episodes, So It Wouldn't Be Fair To Exclude This Episode With No Challenge. So, Here Is Your Challenge. (Points At A 1000 Foot Mountain) Your Challenge Is To Climb That Mountain Filled With Sharp Things And Bear Traps. And Once You Make It All The Way To The Top, Grab The Red Flag And Come Back Down Here. And If You Ask Snowers, No You Cannot Fly Up There Because That Would Be Considered Cheating.
Snowers: Well There Goes A Handicap For Me...
Handy: Sounds Tough. What Do We Win Though?
Brandon G: (Shows a bucket of chicken) A Sweet, Juicy, Delicious Bucket Of Fried Chicken From KF...
Yoyo: (Comes Up To Brandon Holding A Red Flag)
Brandon G: C! C! I KNEW ONE OF YOU WOULD DO THAT!
Yoyo: Alright, Here It Is! I've Got It! Where Is My Chicken At? (Snatches A Bucket Of Chicken And Gobbles It Up)
Brandon G: This Is The Reason Why I Said There Was Going To Be No Challenge Today! Anyways, I Will See All Of You At The Campfire, Whether You Like It Or Not…
Pierce: Whatever Bro.
(At The Cabins)
Lifty: So, Who Should We Send Home Next?
Shifty: Maybe Mole, Because He Is A Weak Player Since He Is Blind.
Mole: (Wacks Both Of Them With His Cane) Next Time, Respect Your Elders, But Do You Really Want To Know Who We Should Send Home? Truffles. Why? Because He's Bratty And Too Much Of A Hothead Mad Guy, That's Why
Shifty: Hey, You're Exactly Right.
Lifty: We Either Have A Choice Between Truffles, Or You Mole.
Mole: (Wacks Both Of Them Again)
(Mole's Video Diary)
Mole: If Lifty, Shifty And Everyone On My Team Want To Make A Good Decision On Who To Get Killed, It Would Be Truffles. No Further Explanation Needed.
(End Of Diary)
(At The Other Cabin)
Flaky: If I Was On The Other Team, I Would Totally Vote Pierce To Die, But Since He's Not On Our Team We Have To Make A Decision That Might Hurt Us In The Long Run.
Disco Bear: Yeah, There's So Much Good People On This Team That Is Probably Hard To Decide.
Flaky: What About Mime, He Hasn't Been Doing Anything In This Competition, Plus He Can't Talk.
Disco Bear: I'm Hip To That.
Flippy: (Listens to Flaky's And Disco Bear's Conversation Sighs In Relief)
(Flippy's Video Diary)
Flippy: I'm Glad They're Not Voting Out Me, Because I'm Expected To Stay In This Competition For A Long While, Plus It Wouldn't Be Right If Krazy Would Be In This Competition Without Me (Phone Suddenly Rings) Hello? Sorry You Got The Wrong Bear? If You're Looking For Pop, Wait, Is There Something Wrong With Cub And Lily? Oh No! Well Make Sure To Tell Him That Right Away Because Our Tribal Council Ceremony Will Be After The Battle Cats Tribal Ceremony. All Right, Okay, See You, Bye (Hangs Up) Judging Of What You Just Heard This Is Not Going To End Well….
(End Of Diary)
(At The Tribal Council, The Battle Cats Showed Up First)
Brandon G: Okay Battle Cats. Here Are The Rules For Tribal Council. Whoever Receives The Most Votes Must Immediately Jump Off This 500 Foot Cliff And Then You Will Die. If You Already Don't Know The Rules Already Since This Is Your Third Time Here
Ale: Just Get On With It Already!
Brandon G: Whatever You Say. The First Vote Goes Out To… WAIT WHAT! That's A First, Only Two Contestants Were Voted For
Truffles: Oh For Crying Out Loud, Just Tell Us Whose God Damn Eliminated Already.
Brandon G: It's Funny That You Say That Truffs, Because You Actually Got More Votes Than More In A Nine To Four Ratio, So You Are Eliminated
Truffles: (Head Turns Red In A Feeling Of Rage And Then He Screams) FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!
Toothy: WHOA! Take A Chill Pill.
Truffles: THIS ISN'T FAIR! I Hope You All Die As Well You Fucking Pieces Of Disgrace.
(Truffles Went Up To The 500 Foot Cliff. He Jumps Off, And His Body Was Ripped Into Pieces. He Is Now Dead)
Russell: Alast, Another Crewmate Has Passed. I Guess It Kind Of Deserved It.
Brandon G: Okay. Tribal Council Over Fellas. Head Back To Your Cabins. I Have Another Tribal Council With The Other Team.
(Pierce's Video Diary)
Pierce: You Know, I Don't Feel Bad For Truffles At All. He Was Getting On Everyone's Nerves. So Fuck Him!
(End Of Diary)
(Toothy's Video Diary)
Toothy: I Am Safe Again. Now I Can Go Back To My Cabin, And Watch Who The Other Team Voted Out.
(End Of Diary)
(Back At The Tribal Council, The Guardian Angels Showed Up)
Brandon G: Sup Guardian Angels? Here Are The Rules Of Tribal Council...
Flippy: I Think Everyone And Their Mother Already Knows The Rules, So Can We Get On With It?
Brandon G: All Right Let's Do It, So The First Vote Goes Out To...
Pop: (Cell Phone Rings)
Brandon G: Huh?
Pop: (Nervous Laugh) Sorry. Hang On A Sec. (Answers Phone) Uhh, Honey, Can't You See I'm In A Dramatic Tribal Council Ceremony. I Know That This Is An Emergency, But I- (Pause) MY SON AND LILY ARE WHAT?! (Shocked) OH MY GOSH! THAT IS AN EMERGENCY! I Will Be Right There In A Flash! (Hangs Up)
Brandon G: Pop, Are You Alright?
Pop: Yeah I'm Fine. I Have To Go Home Now.
Brandon G: Why?
Pop: That Is None Of Your Business, You Will Get A Phone Call From Your Wife About What Just Transpired With Me. Bye Guys. Win This For Me. (Dashes Off At The Speed Of Light)
(All The Tree Friends Looked Shocked)
Brandon G: Well Uhh... I Guess That Settles That For Now. Guess That Means There Will Not Be A... (Phone Rings) Can You Excuse Me For A Second (Answers Phone) Hello... Cheyenne?! This Is Not The Right Time To Call Me Right Now I'm In The Middle Of Hosting A Show, Unless This Is A Major Emergency Then… (Pauses) WAIT WHAT?! HOW'S THAT EVEN POSSIBLE, THEY'RE FIVE AND THAT'S NOT EVEN SUPPOSED TO HAPPEN! (Shocked Mad) Well, That Was Very Unexpected Of You To Say That, And Damn HTF Logic Too, Okay I'll See You Around Later. All Right, Love You, Bye.
Sniffles: So What's Going On With Pop And You.
Brandon G: I Would Tell You, But It's Kind Of Disturbing For You To Know, Let's Just Say Child Sex Has Hit A All-time New Low Thanks To Damn HTF Logic.
Giggles: Hey, That Was My Line!
(Sniffles Video Diary)
Sniffles: I Just Don't Know What Just Transpired But According To My Studies Of Young People, Mainly 5-year-olds In The HTF Dimension, I Think Cub Just You Know What Lily And Lily Is That One Word That Couples Hear When Something Comes Back Positive… I Kind Of Just Gave It Away Didn't I, God Damn It!
(End Of Diary)
(Mime's Video Diary)
Mime: (Sign Language) I Thought They Really Were Going To Get Rid Of Me, But Pop Somehow Quit Because Cub And Lily Had Happy Fun Time (Words Use For Somebody Having Sex) For Some Reason And Now They're That P Word That Nobody Wants To Hear.
(End Of Diary)
(Flaky's Video Diary)
Flaky: If Pierce Thinks He Can Get Away With What Happened Earlier Today, He Is So Dead Wrong. I Know I Am Afraid Of Everything, But Now It's The Time For Me To Use What Disco Bear Taught Me And Stand Up To My Asswipe Of A Cousin And Teach Him A Painful And Severe Lesson He Will Never Forget. He Will Learn To Not Mess With Me Or Anyone Else!
(End Of Diary)
(At The Cabins)
Flaky: (Knocks On Cabin Door)
Handy: (Opens The Door) Yeah?
Flaky: Didn't You Bring Your Tools With You?
Handy: Of Course I Did. Why Did You Ask?
Flaky: I Just Need To Borrow Them For A Second.
(10 Minutes Later)
Pierce: (Runs Around And Screams) AAAHHHHHHH! SOMEBODY GET THESE FUCKING NAILS OFF OF ME!
Flaky: Let That Be A Lesson To You Dipshit! Don't Ever Mess With Me Or Anyone Else Again!
(Face The Black With Yumi's Eyes Opening)
Yumi: Cuddles, One Of These Days I Will Kill Your New Girlfriend And You Will Be The Only One Left For Me!
(Episode Ends With Yumi's Yandere Like Laughter And Castlevania Rondo Of Blood's Version Of Bloody Tears Playing In The Credits)
This Episode Involves Two Tribal Council Ceremony For Both Teams, And Pop Momentarily Exits The Game For A Bizarre Reason Which You Will Soon Find Out. (Or As We Already Found Out, Cub And Lily Foray Into Sex And The End Result Of That) Stay Tuned Next Week For The Next Episode Of Happy Tree Friends: Survivor
Contestants Remaining:
Ale (The Soldier Wolf With A Tragic Past)
Cuddles (The Confident Bunny And Former Father)
Disco Bear (The Ladies Bear)
Flaky (The Fearful Porcupine)
Flippy (The Bear Soldier)
Giggles (The Princess)
Gillian (The Beautiful Yet Dangerous Fox)
Handy (The Handless Beaver)
Josh (The Artist)
Krazy (The Missionary)
Lifty (The Kleptomaniac Raccoon)
Lammy (The Schizophrenic Sheep)
Lumpy (Idiot Boy)
Mime (The Voice Of The Voiceless)
Mole (Legally Blind)
Nutty (The Candy Addicted Squirrel)
Petunia (Former OCD Victim)
Pierce (The Duncan Impersonator)
Russell (The Otter Pirate)
Sammy (The Cuddles X Giggles Supporter)
Shifty (The Second Thief)
Skaggles (The Nightmare Fighter)
Sniffles (The Know-It-All)
Snowers (The Angel Tanooki)
Toothy (The Bucked Tooth Wonder)
Yoyo (Mr. Jackie Chan 2.0)
Contestants Eliminated (In Elimination Order):
Pranky (The Prankster)
Splendid (The Superhero)
Truffles (Vote Or Die Runner-up)
Pop (The Fatherly Bear)
Elimination Votes:
Battle Cats:
Truffles: 9 (Yoyo, Gillian, Sammy, Mole, Pierce, Toothy, Sniffles, Cuddles, Ale)
Mole: 4 (Lifty, Shifty, Truffles, Russell)
Guardian Angels:
No Elimination Because Pop Exits The Game For Bizarre Reason, But Here's What The Elimination Stats Would Had Look Like:
Mime: 7 (Flaky, Flippy, Krazy, Disco Bear, Nutty, Lammy (So Much For That Ship), Lumpy)
Lumpy: 5 (Snowers, Giggles, Petunia, Josh (Voted From The Hospital), Skaggles)
Josh: 3 (Mime, Pop, Handy)
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Snowers Neozor Belongs To NemaoHTF
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Pranky Belongs To Lord 'O Darkness
Pierce Belongs To lexietooter Skull Shirt Redesign Belongs To Lord 'O Darkness
Yoyo Gillian Belongs To Cholnatree
Ale Belongs To The-PirateQueen
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Sammy Belongs To TheSamusterHTF
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