The Tiger Inside
By Nasu Hasami
"It's been a long day without you."
~Wiz Khalifa~
66. Plague
As soon as the anaesthetic wears off, Shang makes his way to theater and watches Gracie and Su operating on Mulan.
He knows it's serious when he sees Su Sun. She's supposed to be on maternity leave.
The crash cart looks like it's already been used. Park's in there as well. He's got blood on his gloves and his scrubs. It's clear he's been operating on Mulan.
Harvey notices Shang before anyone else. He must say something to Gracie because she turns to look at him for a long moment.
It's the kind of look Shang doesn't want to see on anyone's face. It's the kind of look that's on his own face when he has to tell a guardian that an operation was not successful.
Surgery has been in progress for nine hours and 13 minutes. Shang knows the odds of Mulan surviving aren't great.
Then her blood pressure begins to plummet. Park's got the paddles ready.
Shang thinks about the vacation they've booked to the Virgin Islands.
He thinks about the question he might not get to ask Mulan and the ring he might not get to put on her finger.
He thinks about the house and the piano that might never resonate with Liszt again.
He thinks about her stray Crocs in his consultation room.
He thinks about the love notes she writes on post-its and smacks onto his computer when he's in surgery.
He thinks about the future they might not get to share.
He's certain he's going to hate elevators for the rest of his life.
He feels cold.