[Les Claypool]
I'm goin' down to South Park, gonna have myself a time.
[Kyle and Stan]
Friendly faces everywhere, humble folks without temptation.
[Les Claypool]
Goin' down to South Park, gonna leave my woes behind.
[Eric Cartman]
Ample parking day or night, people spouting: "Howdy, neighbor!"
[Les Claypool]
Headin' on up to South Park gonna see if I can't unwind.
[Tweek Tweak & Butters]
Our town is bigger dammit, right down to the little granite.
[Les Claypool]
So come on down to South Park, and meet some friends of mine.
(Pyongyang, North Korea)
Kim Jong-un watched in ah as his new Deathray was in the final stages of construction.
"Soon the Capitalist pig Dogs of the world will bow down to their rightful ruler, me." Kim Jong-un thought to himself. The Dictator then began to feel cold as well as everyone else in the laboratory. The Door behind him quickly frozen solid before being broken into many tiny pieces!
"Stop right there, Kim!"
Kim Jong-un knew who the voice belonged to without turning around. It was one of his most dangerous foes, Wonder Tweek.
The North Korean Dictator turned around and looked at the Nine-year-old boy in his amber eyes while his guards pointed their AK-47's at him.
"You didn't think you could take me down just by yourself did you?"
Wonder Tweek smiled.
"Ack! I could but I decided to bring along some friends." Wonder Tweek said.
The glass ceiling then broke and down came the rest of Coon and friends.
Toolshed, Human kite, Buttersstar, and the last and of course least the Coon.
"You've messed up world politics for the last time Kim!" Human kite said.
Toolshed then got out three grenades then threw them at the Doomsday device as well as several other vital parts of the lab.
The guards aimed at the boys but were stopped when their guns flew out of their arms and stick to Human kite's Magnetic kite.
"Face it, Kim, You've lost. Come with us."
Wonder Tweek then froze Kim's arms and legs together.
"Where are you taking me?" Kim asked.
"You're going to The Hague to face charges along with all the other world criminals for crimes against humanity."
The North Korean Dictator narrowed his eyes.
"You may have captured me now but someday l will-"
"Tweek, have you taken out the trash yet?"
The five boys were brought back to reality. They had been playing in Tweek's backyard and Dougie O'Connell had been playing as Kim Jong-un.
"Ya mom, I already took it out," Tweek answered.
"How does that explain all the old napkins on the floor?"
"Oh jeez, Billie must have gotten into the trash cans."
Tweek then ran back inside.
"Uh, can you guys untie me now? I gotta get home before my mom starts yelling at me to take out the trash." Dougie asked.
"Oh ya sure," Kyle said as he untied Dougie.
"Thanks for playing with us, Dougie," Butters said.
"No problem. So does this mean im the new sixth member?"
Stan, Kyle, and Butters looked at each other nervously. Unsure of what to say.
"Don't call us, Dougie. We'll call you." Cartman said.
"No," Kyle said before looking back at Dougie.
"We will call you when we've made a decision."
Dougie sighed.
"Ok, well thanks anyway for considering me."
"Don't get so down in the Dumps, Dougie. It's just you and five kids left as our choice." Butters said.
Dougie then looked hopeful.
"Really?"
"Definitely. You will hear back from us in a few days."
"Oh boy. Thanks, guys."
Dougie then happily walked out of Tweek's backyard.
"Butters, why did you tell him that? We haven't decided on him or anyone else yet?" Kyle asked.
"Oh jeez, im sorry fellas. I just couldn't stand to see Dougie so sad. Besides, we don't have that many kids that want to be part of our crew."
"Butters is right. Everyone either hates us or is part of someone else's crew. Who else wants to join us again, Kyle?" Stan asked.
Kyle got out his phone and looked at his list.
"Alongside Dougie, we also have Jason white, Douglas Peeters, Louis Handler, and Sally Turner."
Stan sighed.
"Why the hell are we even doing this? We're fine the way we are." Cartman said.
"Aw c'mon Eric. You can't lie and say that you don't miss Lizzy as we do?" Butters asked.
"Nope."
"Don't be an asshole, Cartman. You miss her." Kyle said.
"No, I don't. She was gone half the time and when she was here, she barely did anything. She was a waste of space."
"Shut up Jabba!"
"You shut up ya Dirt-"
Cartman was interrupted when Tweek came back out.
"Ok, sorry guys. I don't know how she gets to it but Billie loves trash. So what are we talking about?"
"We were just going over who the new sixth member should be. I think it should be Dougie." Butters said.
"Sorry, Butters but im gonna have to Disagree. We need someone who is within our age range and Dougie is too young. I'm in favor of Jason."
"Really? You want Boring old Jason white?" Cartman asked.
Tweek shrugged.
"He could surprise us. After all, he's not even the real Jason, he's technically a clone. That at least is interesting."
"Tweek's got a point," Stan said.
While the boys were talking, they were unaware that Dougie was listening to them. The young boy clenched his fists in anger as he heard this. They weren't going to pick him, all they did was give him false hope.
He wiped away a single tear then ran halfway down his cheek before he decided to walk home.
As the young boy was a few feet away from his front door. He felt his phone vibrate. He noticed a text from an unknown number. It read: You don't deserve to be treated like Dirt. If you want to teach Stan, Kyle, Tweek, Cartman, and Butters a lesson then come to this address in ten minutes.
After waiting the recommended ten minutes, Dougie walked out of town, and towards the abandoned oil refinery.
Once he got there he walked into the entrance and only saw pitch black Darkness. The door behind him closed and all he heard for a few moments were the scurrying of rats.
"Uh, hello? Is anyone here? I got your text."
The lights then came on and revealed Scott Tenorman as well as two other masked fourth graders.
"We're so happy you could make it here, Dougie. Soon our little team will be complete." Scott said.
Dougie noticed that Scott was missing several teeth and the few that were left were in bad shape. The teen had an unhealthy appearance, he was too skinny, he had several bald patches on his head as well was only wearing a Dirty and torn shirt and pants.
"So what exactly do you want from me?" Dougie asked.
"It's simple really, I want to kill Eric cartman…but not right away. I want to destroy everything my half-brother holds dear but since he's cowardly, Selfish, Racist, Anti- somatic, and a probable sociopath, it's going to be difficult but not impossible.
I want to crush Eric in the best way I can. By destroying his pride."
"H-how are you going to ban do that?"
"Simple. My brother thinks that his alter ego the coon is the greatest superhero since Spiderman. I'm going to become the raccoon's natural enemy."
Scott then took out a strange Dog costume then put q Dog mask on.
"Im going to be The Coonhound and together we will form Coonhound and friends."
To be continued.
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