Mistaken: Chapter Nine

Jedi believed in the afterlife, their spirit joined the Force. I had dedicated my entire life to the Force and had always been taught that my midichlorians would feed the others after I died and I would therefore live on while empowering future Jedi.

I had never considered an alternative. For those who followed a darker path, did they feed the Dark? Or did they suffer a torturous existence on another plain, to eternally pay for their evil deeds?

True, I had failed my mission. Not only had Padmé died due to my incompetence, but our unborn child did as well. That one mistake had apparently banished me to eternal suffering. I believed this mainly due to the intense heat that surrounded me, as well as the scorched holes burned into my uniform. If this was my fate, then so be it. I would pay for my apparent inability to keep my family safe if the Force deemed it necessary. What other choice did I have?

I had yet to open my eyes, unsure if I wanted to see what lie before me, but was prompted by a familiar voice. One I almost knew better than my own.

To say I was shocked when I beheld the scene beneath me would be an understatement. My Padawan, somehow and for some unknown reason, was lying on a slope of obsidian. Directly behind him ran a river of molten lava, and I watched in horror as what was left of his lower body erupted in flame. Strangled by the disturbing scene, I couldn't find my voice, especially after my student screeched out his hatred for me, his eye color matching the hues of the magma.

What the hell? What was happening?

In my grip was a lightsaber. My lightsaber. And nearby lay the boy's amputated legs.

This was my doing. I knew that as sure as I knew what color the blade of my weapon would be. I stumbled back, unsure of where to go or what to do when another voice called. This one was softly spoken and desperate in nature. I recognized it as well and ran toward its source, coming full stop and dropping to my knees before my beloved Padmé. She was unconscious and lying on the landing platform of this wretched place and obviously pregnant. With some effort, I lifted her and spun around. There were buildings here and equipment for mining. However, everything appeared to be operated by droids. I had to take her somewhere else. I had to find help.

Was there help in the afterlife? Or only pain? And if this was my sentence, why was she forced to share it with me? She had done nothing wrong!

On my roundabout, I spied a ship. I immediately recognized it as Padmé's personal vessel. Panicked, I thought of nothing else but getting her some medical attention, and I carried her on board. If this indeed was another realm, I shouldn't be able to escape it. However, the engines fired and lift-off was successful. We left the burning pile of rock behind us along with the ash that was once my Padawan.

Adrenaline was the only thing that kept me collapsing. I had to find help. I wouldn't fail her again. A quick computer search directed me to a med unit nearby. Polis Massa. How had we come to be all the way out here? Desperation caused me to act instead of find answers, and I steered in that direction, putting the controls on auto-pilot so I could check on Padmé.

I had laid her on the bed we had once shared. After placing a hand on her swollen belly, I confirmed two separate heartbeats. Twins? The witch had only mentioned one. And where had the time gone? Speaking of the witch – where was she? And how had I ended up fighting with my apprentice?

A multitude of questions and confusion filled my mind, but my attention was focused upon a groan coming from my wife. I bent over to caress her face, the hushed words she spoke haunting me.

"Obi-Wan. Is Anakin all right?"

Before I could reply, her eyes closed and she succumbed to unconsciousness.

I didn't understand. This had to be a trick. This wasn't real!

"Let me go!" I yelled out as tears of aggravation filled my eyes. "Let her go! Stop this insanity immediately!"

Despite my pleading, I realized there would be no answer, and once again I was swept away. Only this time, I was overlooking a birth: A birth of two babies that, much to my dismay, I discovered were not my own. I was forced to listen as Padmé's final words concerned Anakin. She had nothing to say to me. We were almost strangers. There was no love for me in her eyes. In fact, there was very little left of her at all. All of her strength, her determination, and her joy for life were gone. She was a pale comparison to the woman I had known and loved. I was heartbroken to see her die in this manner.

This wasn't right. And yet, I was forced to relive it again and again. Each time, the starting point was different. Sometimes I was in the middle of an intense battle with Anakin, sometimes, I was at its finality as before. But every ending was the same. I was helpless to stand and hold the child of the woman I loved while she died, and there wasn't a damn thing I could do about it.

For the first time in my life, I believed in Hell.