Reunion
Rufus liked to eat finely, sitting at a table that was too big for just the two of us. Two servants and a guard hovered close by in a room with a high ceiling and red curtains to the walls. The table was draped with white silk, beautifully gold patterned glass plates out with foods I wasn't familiar with. I tried not to let the smells of fish unsettle my stomach when I was given a plate. I rammed a cloth napkin up my face, to block the smell, praying that I won't vomit in front of Rufus. He mustn't know. I can't let him know, or else I was afraid what would happen to me, or worst, to my unborn child. I was still too early to notice, so it was easy to fool everyone. But for how long?
Rufus did take notice when I didn't touch my food, his seat taken right beside me instead of to the other side of the table. He worked with his silverware delicately, carving his knife into his fish with a little too much pleasure, and ripped its spiny ribs apart to get into the flaky meat.
"The crew wanted to have a huge celebration dinner for our small victory today, but I told them I wanted to be alone with you this evening," he began, trying for a conversation. Candlelight made his face yellow, adding a cliché romantic touch to the dinner table, but I wasn't interested, staying quiet. Tall windows from floor to ceiling, stood beside us, and I looked out, watching night fall, a dark ocean and a bright red Meteor still glowing like the new night sun.
My eyes then averted across the table to its other end, spotting a small box wrapped in a pink bow.
Rufus was observant, and he asked, "Are you interested in what I got you?" And he bit into more fish meat, chewing politely.
I didn't nod, still processing that this is where I was from now on. One minute, I was stuck in my old world, New York and Iceland, unexpectedly pregnant and wondering if that was going to be my life. And now, I was sitting in a fitting black dress beside Rufus, his left hand glued to my thigh, suddenly feeling like I've been pressured to be an object of his.
I licked my dry lips, carefully peeling back my napkin from it, and took careful inhales in my mouth to stop the strong smells from doubling me over.
"Are you wanting to eat something else?" Rufus asked, still trying.
I was oddly craving Taco Bell, a food I only tried once in my life, and yet, my body clung it its memory as though it was the only food in the world. Was there Taco Bell burritos in Junon?
I took another glance at my untouched grilled fish with its white eyes still stuck on its shocked face, and I swallowed.
Maybe I could really try to talk to Rufus, just to lay it out for him anyway. My fingers tapped nervously along my fork's long silver body, amazed at how clean it looked. I was surprised Rufus wasn't on his phone, nor was he disturbed by anyone, and wondered if he asked for it that way. Was this opportunity rare with the leader of the World?
I shifted in my seat, my fingers playing with my engagement ring from Isaac, and very carefully, slid it off. The ring laid snug in my fist as I began, "You don't have to try, you know."
Rufus perked, his eyes turned to me while he kept showing me his sharp profile.
"Try?"
"You know, with all of this. Like having dinner together, just the two of us when I know you have a busy schedule. There's no point," I mumbled, and with a lift of my foot under the table, I slipped the ring inside my heel. Luckily, Rufus didn't notice, too busy processing my words. He settled his fork down, and dabbed at his lips with a cloth napkin, while his left hand crept further up my thigh. I grabbed at it before it would slide under my dress, and that seemed to make him chuckle to himself.
"Giving up because Cloud is dead, and yet, you won't let me do what I want to you. It takes time, I understand," he began, and he slipped his hand away.
He gestured to a bottle of red wine and asked me, "Care for a drink?"
But I shook my head quietly, not chancing my baby from suffering any possible consequences to me consuming any alcohol. A female servant stepped in and poured a glass for Rufus, and he took a long sip.
"I can't drink too much either. There's a meeting right after this," he muttered, and yet, he took another long swig.
When he settled his glass back to the table, he twisted its thin stem between his fingers delicately, his eyes concentrating on it spinning.
"There is a point," he clarified, still stuck on what I said a minute ago. He slumped one arm over the head of his cushioned chair, appearing casual for the first time. One small, blond bang fell loose, resting on his sharp cheekbone.
"You're with me now, and yes, giving me children with powers is what I want. But I will make sure to make you happy as long as you do as I say," he insisted. I threw him a glare.
"You only play nice just so you get what you want? How sweet," I snapped. Rufus's eyes moved to me, and his face held some secret plot.
"Careful, my dear," and his eyes flashed with a loose fragment of instability. I took deep breaths, feeling the urge to vomit, and planted my napkin to my lips again while Rufus took the quiet moment to take another drink.
After a lingering few minutes of uncomfortable silence, the nausea lingered, but I dropped my napkin to my lap and sighed.
"Rufus," I called, and he seemed pleased to hear his name from me, for he smiled as he settled his glass down. He fully turned in his seat, facing me while leaning his chin into his curled fingers, elbow on the table.
"Yes?"
I swallowed, hands tight around the napkin.
"How do you intend to stop Meteor?" And I actually looked at him, watching one of his eyebrows jolted up with amusement. He closed his eyes and leaned back in his seat.
"I have a few plans working in motion," and he left it at that. When he was quiet, I wanted to dig for more.
"Will you tell me what they are?"
But Rufus gave me a look, and I knew what it meant, like he still didn't trust me and wanted me to wait patiently before I had enough privilege to know more about his personal world.
"Not yet," he chirped, pushing his glass away. He pulled back a grey silk sleeve of his dress shirt, and glanced down at his digital watch. He sighed, and rose from his chair.
"Please, leave us," he ordered to his two guards and servant. Without a word, three bodies left the room. I tensed, and glanced at the door opening, bringing in hallway light to the floor. I stole a glance and found Reeve out there, his face nervous. He and I locked eyes before the door closed.
Rufus and I were alone.
I twisted my napkin so hard in my hands until it hurt.
Calmly, Rufus walked around the table, taking the wrapped gift into his hands as I asked him as steadily as I could, "Do you know how long until Meteor falls?"
Rufus shrugged as he walked along the table towards me, and he sat on its edge, legs crossed and polished black shoes tapping the air.
He settled the gift over his lap as he pondered my question, head down and eyes concentrating hard on the carpet.
"Twenty-two days, but who knows. It could be sooner. Texts collected from the Elders claim it takes a month for Meteor to finalize its form," he muttered, lifting his serious ice, blue eyes back to me. I began to feel queasy again, and I instinctively settled my hands over my small belly.
"That's not very long," I muttered, staring off to the dark night. I'll barely be in the second trimester. Will my baby not get a chance to see the light of day?
"Long enough for some things to occur," I heard Rufus chirp. I looked back to him, and again, more hidden plot leaked from his smile. He rattled the finely wrapped gift in one hand over his lap.
"How about your gift?"
"I don't want anything," I replied flatly.
I wanted to be near Isaac. Was he too, standing outside the door, being a good watchdog? Would he do nothing if Rufus tried to take advantage of me? I had to tell myself, despite a familiar face or two in Rufus's world, I was still alone. If anything awful were to happen to me, I couldn't rely on anyone. Not Cloud. Not Isaac. Not Reeve. No one.
I was alone.
I shuddered out an exhalation, trying not to dive too deep into negative thoughts again. When I thought of my baby, how it had a long way to go, I suddenly remembered there was, at least, the two of us. I had to protect it.
Behind the candlelight, Rufus's silk grey dress shirt glimmered, his white vest appearing too bright. With a grin, he handed the gift box to me. It was light, like a t-shirt box, but wrapped in fine, white paper and pink ribbon like it was for a girl baby shower.
I held the gift, staring absently at it with little interest. But I felt his glare, his steady anger brewing inside him, and my hands got to work. I pulled at the ribbon, trying not to have my thoughts fall to Cloud pulling at green ribbons on my shoulders, his lips to my skin with his beautiful, glowing eyes closed.
I took a deep breath to calm myself. Don't do that. Don't fall back, it's not going to help you.
The ribbon fell loose, and with care, I unwrapped the paper, finding it professionally folded without tape, so I easily collected it into a neat folded stack. Just a white box left. I slipped off its lid, and just contemplated over what laid inside.
Two thin metal bracers, like they were from Isaac's mech suit, navy metal cells all collided like scales with silver designs.
I furrowed my brow.
"What is this?" I asked.
Rufus reached gently, taking one from the box of tissue, and unclasped the bracer, held together by tiny electric currents and magnetic technology. My stomach twisted when he took one of my wrists, and clasped the bracer into place. I was suddenly thrilled to have removed my ring, or else Rufus's observant eyes would've noticed it by now, and there would be questions. Did he know Isaac and I had history? I had the feeling he didn't, and I planned to keep it that way.
With one bracer in place, it felt like nothing was even there as horrible thoughts surfaced. I was literally replacing Cloud. That's what it felt like as the new bracer settled tightly, almost no room for even a needle to fit between the metal and my skin as it stayed matte in candlelight.
After the other was placed, I analyzed them both on my arms, unsure as to why I was given such a gift. Was Rufus trying to best Cloud with his own, copied gift idea? What's his angle?
Rufus took out his cellphone and his pale face glowed blue by its screen, his fingers getting to work. He kept his screen private as he purred, "Scarlet made these out of the same material Zero's mech suit is made of. Marvelous choice for you. Do you know why?" It sounded like a trick question, one that he already knew the answer to, and I knew I was being played with.
I gave him an uneasy look.
"No. Why?"
Rufus's smile widened as he pressed his touch screen.
Suddenly, the bracers dug tiny needles into my skin and I screamed from the burning sensation. I imagined someone taking my arms and putting them over a lit gas stove. It took about a minute for the pain to subside, leaving my arms shaking over the table. I tried to take my fingers to one of the bracers, in hopes to peel it off, but it wouldn't budge, and Rufus shook his head at my attempt.
"Because it's like Zero's suit, it's anti-magic. I won't say that I don't trust you, but let's not chance it, shall we?"
I jumped out of my chair, and slammed my arms down onto the table, trying to see if I could bend the metal that fit too perfectly around my wrists. But all I did was knock down our glasses and candles.
The room darkened.
Only a glimmer of city pollution was my light, spilling faintly from the windows to leave half of Rufus in a soft orange.
His phone smacked down on the table, and then I felt a cold hand take to my shoulder.
I stepped back, tossing my chair backwards, and tried to summon the Planet's powers into my body as Rufus advanced. But nothing happened.
My arms felt heavy as I tried to find any green glimmer to them, but came up with nothing. I was an empty shell.
Rufus pinned me against the window, tight hands curled at my wrists. He squeezed until it hurt, and I winced behind clenched teeth while feeling the warm window pressed against my back.
Rufus began to tremble, his face closing in towards mine, when I tucked my chin into my chest, feeling his hot breath on my cheek.
"Let's get to the point. Cloud is dead. He won't save you. No one will. So, you better get used to me. Even with Meteor, I swear, I won't let that stop me from keeping this Planet alive for a little bit longer. I have many plans to stop it. You will love me, and you will give me Ancient children! I will make sure there is a future for them and for us! If you do not cooperate, there will be consequences! Do we have an understanding?" I've never heard Rufus's voice rise above a normal conversation before. It rattled me to hear him growl, shaking me as he told me what his desires were.
I shivered to his strong voice, how it easily spread fear when he unleashed it, and I knew it didn't come often.
Carefully, I lifted my gaze, letting myself get stabbed by Rufus's diamond blue eyes, such a stare capable of cutting into me deeply.
"Yes," I hissed at him, whatever it took to get his hands off me. But it seemed to do the opposite effect, a hunger flashing in his smoldering stare, eyelids dropping. I shook up when I felt his lips falling to my shoulder, teeth tugging at my strap.
"Rufus, please no," I gasped, slipping my arms free to plant my hands against his chest. He disobeyed, easily getting carried away when a strap fell, lips dropping kisses down my arm. I squirmed just before shoving him.
"No!" I cried, and he fell back two steps while glaring down at me.
"You want this the easy way, or the hard way?" Rufus warned as I returned his glare.
Before I could answer, he charged and grabbed a fistful of my hair, pulling it up until I shrieked from a sharp pain shooting into my scalp.
I shut my eyes as my hands wrapped around the pulled hair, to take back any leverage to reduce the pain. Rufus spat in my face, "I will take pleasure in making this harder for you," and drops of his saliva speckled on my lips and cheeks.
His lips suddenly mashed into mine, and I turned my head back and forth to try to break it. The more I fought, the harder he tugged at my hair until there were tears. I tried pushing him away again, but he pressed himself against me, leaving me sandwiched in between his hard body and the window.
Rufus finally released my hair, and snatched my wrists. His fingers curled tight around the new bracers, and he gladly smacked them against the window, his lips still trying to dig deeper into mine when he kissed again. Inside, I screamed and latched onto his lower lip with my teeth.
"Shit," he hissed after he pulled back, licking at his bleeding lip. A drop of his blood lingered on my tongue, and I spat it out, hopefully hitting his fine, white vest.
When it did, Rufus became aware, his eyes lingering on the red stain to his perfect outfit. Now it was ruined, no longer pure.
He lifted his eyes, and something dangerous materialized.
His grip hardened around my wrists as his teeth clenched tight, his body vibrating with the growing impulse to go violent.
Impatience swelled in Rufus's grip when he suddenly yanked me down towards the floor, making me stumble on my hands and knees. Before I could rush to stand, he came on top of me, and I twisted underneath him.
No, not now. Not like this. I wanted there to be more time. When? Ideally never. I expected to have more time to process, to plan, but I could feel Rufus's eagerness burn in his hands when he grabbed my arms and pinned me down.
"No!" I cried, squirming away from his hard body pressed against me.
"Rufus, please!" I begged, his eyes staring longingly at me, as though the more I fought against him, the more he desired me. He liked watching me beg and try to slip away from his hands, smiling wider.
"Usually men and women throw themselves at me," he shared, his stiff groin pressed in between my legs until I panicked.
"The more you fight it, the more it turns me on," he added, whispering into my ear before kissing it. Lips and teeth gnawed on my neck as I cried out, my hands locked by his. Rufus's mouth was free to do whatever he wanted, my legs pressed down firmly by his solid thighs. Again, his teeth pulled one strap away, and sucked onto my skin.
"I've wanted you since I first saw you," he trembled, shivering in a wave of euphoria.
To inflict pain and fear seemed to give Rufus a high, soaking in it as his lips grazed over my collar bones to my other strap, taking it into his teeth.
I whimpered, closing my eyes and wishing for it to be over already. My thoughts tried to drift to a happier place as my last strap fell, and he steered his lips over to the front zipper.
"I told Reeve I wanted you to wear something like this, for this exact purpose," Rufus shared quietly, taking the zipper with his teeth. He pulled at it along the middle of my chest, his head falling with it, until my dress began to split in two.
An urgent knock came at the door.
"Mr. President. Your presence is required for the meeting. We have an update on transport!" It sounded like Reeve, and I silently thanked the Gods.
Rufus cursed under his breath, more of his hair out of place. He kept me pinned down, but turned his head over his shoulder to shout at the door, "Didn't I specify not to be disturbed while at dinner this evening?" His tone sounded very unstable.
"But sir, it's already fifteen minutes pass, and since this is about test day, you're needed to discuss the date since you haven't shared when you want the wedding," Reeve replied nervously. I imagined his hands fiddling together, his high caffeinated body twitching him into a mass of anxiety. But a word struck a thick cord in me.
Wedding?
Rufus sighed, his hot breath laying heat to my breasts, and finally, like it was going to be painful for him, he peeled off me.
"There will be other chances. I must be patient," he told himself, running his hands through his hair to fix it.
I didn't say anything, sitting up and zipping my dress while feeling numb, wet eyes falling to nothing as my hands trembled to lift my straps back into place.
Rufus was watching me as he unbuttoned his vest.
"That was the easy way," he sneered, and opened the door. Light poured inside, and I heard him spat, "Get me a clean white vest, and make sure she stays in my room until I get back. No one is to be in there with her!"
His footsteps faded. When I knew Rufus finally disappeared, I just convulsed, legs curled into me as I sobbed on the rug, letting out all of my nerves when I thought he was going to force his way into me.
"Aqua!" It was Reeve, and he knelt nearby, laying a warm hand to mine nervously.
I immediately dove into his arms and wept.
"Oh Reeve! He almost... but I can't... I can't!" I cried into his wrinkled suit, his red tie collecting my tears. I inhaled old ramen and days old cologne, hinting that poor Reeve has been stuck in the same suit for days, too busy to even clean himself properly. But I clung to him anyway, sobbing quietly on the floor as I whimpered into his shirt.
Reeve laid his arms down carefully, his mind ticking thoughts to himself as his eyes laid hard at the fallen chair next to me.
"Like I said, I will do all that I can to help," he shared in an unsteady voice, not confident that he will succeed.
"But for how long? How long?!" I wept.
Reeve grunted, my question painful to answer.
"Until we all probably die."
Rufus's luxurious room reminded me of his suits. I stared into it as I hovered in the doorway, standing in between two infantrymen.
One of them scratched his nose as he spoke, his voice a little too nervous, a rookie.
"Uh, please wait in here, miss."
Wait in there and what? For Rufus to come back and finish what he started?
I shook as I stepped inside, the door slid shut behind me, and it locked from the outside.
The room felt too large and aesthetic. The King size bed laid pristine, with six grey pillows to match its silk covers. Three glass walls surrounded it, one of them displaying a flat screen of a virtual fish tank. Thick grey carpet scattered across a white marble floor. There was a long, grey couch to the other end of the room, and a small desk with another glass screen. The ceiling was high, a modern chandelier just a ring of light over it all. I noticed the windows, taking up all of one wall, showing nothing but darkness, and I felt exposed, but knew no one could see me when I was over the sea.
I began to feel sick, and I rushed into a bathroom to spill into a toilet.
After flushing, I washed my face, towels already there for me, and I took one to dry off.
When the towel dropped from my red eyes, I looked at myself in the mirror.
Rufus left a number of his marks on my shoulders and neck, horrid black spots against my pale skin.
My body heated, teeth clenched tight until my head shook as my eyes burned into those marks reflected in the mirror. I screamed, throwing the towel on the floor, and ran out of the bathroom. I headed straight for the bed, and crumbled over it, my face deep in a pillow, and sobbed.
Holding myself, I cried out Aerith's name and Cloud's name over and over, wishing either of them to show themselves in dream, in voice, anything to tell me that they were somewhere, watching me. I wept, trying to relax, knowing that too much stress was awful for the baby, but I couldn't stop.
I imagined Cloud's arms coming in from behind, holding me close to him, his rare smile rubbed against my neck.
I love you.
Why did you have to die, Cloud? Why didn't you just let me stay in the Lifestream with you and Aerith? Were you aware of what I was going to fall into? Of what would happen to me?
I've never missed him so much in my life. What was I to do? Wait it out with Rufus until Meteor falls? Work with Rufus to stop Meteor and live the rest of my days as his wife, birthing him children? Or do I sneak out of here, heading to the Ancient City to find the White Materia and summon Holy myself?
It was only those three options, and I didn't like any of them. Summoning Holy would stop Meteor, but it would take my life, and my child's. Could I go through with that? The more I thought of these awful plans, the harder I cried until I became exhausted.
There was nothing left but a large wet spot to my pillow, sniffing and whimpering while the room grew cold and empty.
Eventually, I heard a door open and close, and I kept my face hidden, curling my body tighter into itself as the footsteps neared, fearing it was Rufus readying his claws.
A rough, cold hand came to my arm, and I screamed, smacking it back as I launched out of my pillow cave.
"Aqua, it's okay," Isaac hushed, taking my hands softly, his metal fingers ice-cold. He held them up as I breathed heavily, my wet eyes wide at him standing over the bed. He took one look at me and frowned, eyebrows furrowed upward.
"Aqua..."
"Let go of me!" I screamed, pulling away from his hold, and rushed off the bed to get as far away from him as I could.
"Leave me alone! Stay away from me!" I bawled, knowing Isaac has seen the marks. He must've considered me to be a pathetic, sex object. I was suddenly no different from him, the both of us used to please our masters.
I retreated to the middle of the room, standing near the long couch, and gripped its back tight, wanting to dig my nails through its leather and scream no one to touch me ever again.
"Aqua," Isaac whispered, stepping closer, but he kept his hands to himself.
When I felt his lingering stare, I licked my lips and asked him, "How did you get in here?"
His presence came closer, and I wished he wouldn't. I was so vulnerable, afraid to have him so close.
"I bribed the guards. It's not uncommon," he replied.
"No, I mean, the meeting. Aren't you supposed to be with Rufus at the meeting?" I fretted, afraid that, at any moment, Rufus will walk in and see us together, alone.
Isaac closed his eyes.
"There's time. The meeting is not over for another half hour. I...um, don't ask how I got out of it, please." His voice dropped, not wanting to go into details.
"Well, what do you want? To rescue me? To sweep me off my feet and take me, too? To replace Cloud, is that it?" I hissed, refusing to turn around and look at him.
Isaac gasped to my words.
"Aqua, I don't know what you expected. I told you to stay home because I knew you would end up like this. I wish you had just stayed, but now I know that's a lost cause."
I didn't say anything, and Isaac must've seen my arms, the bracers, my prison cuffs in place.
"I see he's finally got you to wear them. He's had those made a while back," Isaac shared. I looked down at the slim bracers, and again, tried to dig my nails under the metal, but unable to grip anything. It was like picking at skin, and it hurt whenever I tried to catch the bracer's edge with my nail.
"How do I get these off?" I struggled, and finally gave up when it seemed hopeless.
"Rufus has a few devices. His phone is his most treasured possession, probably more so than you. He also has..." I heard him shake his head.
"Never mind. Do you have a plan?"
I laughed sadly to myself, finding Isaac's anxious expression reflected off glass against a white wall.
"No, not really," I replied quietly.
"Aqua..."
"Do you?" I challenged, still wishing he would back off, to leave me in my personal bubble so that I may not do something regrettable. My heart belonged to Cloud, but Isaac's familiarity was an awful temptation, and I was frightened by it.
Isaac sighed, and he walked a little closer until I could hear him right next to me.
"I don't. Either Rufus stops Meteor, or he doesn't. How you fall into that, I'm not confident. Can you stop Meteor?"
His metal shoulder brushed against mine and I stepped away, feeling even colder. Without use of my magic, I felt naked and weak.
"I can, if I can take the bracers off and go back to the Forgotten City," I muttered, the third option I came up with earlier, coming to mind.
"Why? What's there?"
"The White Materia. It fell somewhere on that Altar. If I can get it back and use it, I can summon Holy to stop Meteor," I explained. I didn't dare share the consequences that followed to that plan, but Isaac already knew when he narrowed his eyes. His metal hands found my shoulders, and he twisted me around gently.
"I won't let you do that. There has to be another way," he worried, trying to snatch on to my eyes, but I kept looking away, shivering to his hold.
"How do you know? How did you find us on that altar? How did you know about the bracelet?"
Isaac's hands slipped away, and his shoulders sagged, eyes wandering up across the couch over to the glass screen, seeing nothing but the white wall behind it.
"Reeve. He told me everything. That was his job. He was supposed to keep an eye on you for Rufus, and tell him everything that was happening. His report on the temple of the Ancients was remarkable.
"After Cait Sith operation was over, Rufus sent me as his spy. I found Cloud and your friends back in Rocket Town refueling that plane, but I discovered that you were already gone. I damaged their plane, and left them there to find you and your friend on my own. When I found you two, I followed quietly."
I finally looked at Isaac, seeing guilt in his eyes, and they were brown for a moment, the Mako fading to give me just a glimpse of his human self.
"I knew, after you lost your friend, just one pull of that bracelet, and you would release so much power because you loved her so much. What a better place than at the altar. Cloud and his friends weren't succeeding in keeping you alive. There was no other choice."
He looked at me, the real Isaac glowing inside those eyes.
"I did what I've always wanted to do for you, but you came back," he whispered, shaking his head to himself as though he still couldn't believe I was standing in front of him.
There was the yearning to reach, but I clasped my hands together instead, feeling exhausted from fighting against it. I looked into Isaac's eyes carefully, and asked tiredly, "Isaac, please tell me what happened to Cloud."
Instantly, he looked away before the Mako flared in his eyes, and walked pass me, heading towards the windows to gaze out at the dark ocean.
"Haven't we looked out at the dark ocean a few times by now? It's funny how our encounters lately involve the ocean," Isaac shared randomly. I watched how his eyes stirred, a hint of a spark behind the Mako that poisoned his gaze. He crossed his arms, staying quiet, when I walked near his back, his mech suit giving off faint glows of Mako between the microscopic cracks. His eyes glowed, reflected off the window, and they flickered up to Meteor.
"Isaac," I pleaded, enough of his lingering.
He sighed, fogging up the window with his breath, and he sunk a little.
"I was there. We all were," he began.
Upon the airship's main bridge, Isaac leaned in close to its front windows, his face falling into the curve of the glass, and scanned below. A massive crater upon a frozen land, gushed out flares of the Planet's energy, many storms happening below the ship.
Scarlet chuckled to herself as she had a look, wedging so close to Isaac, he scoffed and took a few steps away from her strong perfume and annoying laugh.
"Mr. President, we found it! This is it!" She gushed, her droopy eyes sparkling to the crater.
Rufus stayed far behind her, his arms crossed over his white trench coat, and smiled lightly to himself when he got a glimpse of it.
The Promise Land.
"It's really here. Sorry old man. It's mine now," he muttered to himself, looking up to the heavens as though he believed his father was watching him. Isaac found he did that often, talking to himself when he addressed back to his dead father.
Heidegger joined the viewing party, and scanned the rugged rocky and ice terrain inside the crater.
"It's gigantic. We will have to be cautious when landing," he informed.
They landed and trekked the rough lands. Mako sprouted freely like geysers, spreading its toxic powers into the green air, leaving behind a fog. Issac worried to inhale it, but then he remembered he had it in his body, he can live with it. He walked beside Rufus, taking a glance to the others and his troops following, and none of them wore masks. What a bunch of idiots.
"Zero," Rufus began, sensing the cyborg was too quiet.
Isaac swallowed, already picturing the electric currents zapping his body into convulsions, and quickly, turned his attention to his boss.
"Yes, sir?"
Rufus smiled at nothing in particular, his hair whooshed by another rough gust of green winds and snow flurries.
"When we reach the heart of the crater, do you think she'll be there?"
"She, sir?" But Isaac already knew who the President meant.
Rufus closed his eyes and tucked his hands into his pockets. His dutiful guard hound, Darkstar, crept nearby like the President's shadow, sniffing the air with hesitance.
Rufus considered his companion, how he watched it with possession.
"Aqua," he simply replied, possibly picturing her chained to his side as well.
Isaac thought about that. The crater seemed unstable, the Lifestream leaking out easily, may bursts of potential energy just thrown into the air abundantly.
But he didn't want her to come back, and hoped it wouldn't happen easily in such a place.
"No, she's gone, sir."
"Gone as in dead? I still don't quite understand your report."
Isaac hesitated, knowing the others were around, ease dropping on this conversation of theirs, and it made him uncomfortable. He cleared his throat.
"She's back to her world. Losing her dear friend, the other Ancient one, upset her so much, her powers transported her back from that altar."
"Ah, to her world. Which is yours too, is it not?" Rufus pried.
Isaac nodded.
"Yes, sir."
"And that Altar is the gate? Is that how it works? A large amount of energy on the altar can transport anyone into another world, like yours?" Rufus dug further, and Isaac narrowed his eyes, feeling something brew in Rufus's sharp mind.
"Supposedly," he replied lamely, done with the conversation.
Thereafter, Rufus let his thoughts stay hidden, smiling to himself, which left Isaac feeling uneasy.
What was he planning? He wasn't thinking of trying to find a way to open the gateway, was he? That would be impossible. No one but Ancients with their powerful magic could unlock it, that was all that Isaac knew from Reeve's reports on the temple, anyway. And Isaac was still peeved he couldn't go, aware that Aqua would be there, but where Rufus goes, he goes.
His muscles tensed at the thought, a working slave to Rufus, and... He looked at Scarlet behind him, and she blew him a kiss when she caught his hard eyes. Isaac forced a smile and looked away.
And a sex machine for Scarlet.
His eyes averted to Hojo, slithering behind them with his own guards.
And an experiment for that freak.
That was all Isaac was to these sick people. It pissed him off, and he tried to settle the Mako that quickly pulsed into his core, increasing his strength until he was almost bursting, Mako sparks laying loose along the cracks of his suit.
It was a long way down, and Isaac was glad to wipe out at any monsters that got in his way. He blasted them to bits gladly, channeling all his frustration into the monstrous behemoth and small dragons, saving him from possibly killing his own master.
They finally reached a crystallized world, all the walls around them nothing but chunks of Materia. Scarlet's eyes grew, her red lips open.
"Look at all of this is Materia, it's splendid!" She awed, spinning under a ceiling of crystal until her loose red wine dress bloomed around her thighs.
"Incredible," Rufus marveled, though his eyes remained dull. Nothing seemed to put a spark into that man, except money and inflicting pain. Isaac secretly glared at Rufus from behind a tower of blue Materia, his thoughts taking him someplace dark, while everyone else seemed overjoyed.
"The Promise Land doesn't exist," Hojo was saying, waddling up in his lab coat like he had no other wardrobe. He lifted his squinted eyes up to all the Materia hanging from the ceiling, like hundreds of glistering green and blue diamonds, chunks of them with their sharpened edges pointed to him. Isaac wished one of the crystals would fall and kill Hojo.
"The Promise Land is simply a myth," the bitter scientist added, hands behind his back.
Rufus gave Hojo a cold look.
"And that's why you're a second rated scientist," he shared cruelly. Scarlet snickered, while Hojo hissed, insulted.
"Say what you will. This is YOUR Promise Land, but I pictured a place where only Ancients could reach," he replied, and turned his head away, not wanting to notice Rufus's glare.
Isaac wasn't impressed. Nothing seemed to really impress him anymore. He felt done, just a walking machine, with no say, no input, nothing but living day after day, waiting and waiting. Now that Aqua was gone, back home, what was he waiting for? What was he to do now? Isaac still had no answer, even when he thought for days after her departure. He could still remember her lips, how startled she looked when he kissed her. He closed his eyes, wanting nothing more than to kiss her again.
"What now, sir? We found where our Neo Midgar should be," Scarlet reported, a hand to her hip.
Rufus crossed his arms, considering all the glistering walls around him. It was like being inside a crystal cave, with all its wonders and energy. Isaac knew all he saw were dollar signs. Just like his fucking father.
"We need to return to the ship and set up an inspect-!"
Unexpectedly, someone appeared, and he stopped his words.
Isaac turned his head, and there, standing in the middle of the massive room of crystallized Materia, was Cloud.
"What?!" Cried Rufus, appalled that the ex-SOLDIER just showed up out of thin air.
Isaac watched carefully, his Mako enhanced eyes telling him that something was off about Cloud. The quiet man had his head slumped, eyes closed, and fists tight at his side. In one of his hands, he held it firmly, the Black Materia.
Hojo gasped. "Well, well, what is this?" He suddenly seemed interested.
But Rufus had none of that, glaring at the intruder.
"Why the hell are you here?" The President argued, and he pulled out his revolver, ready to use it. Darkstar growled beside him, showing sharp teeth. Isaac wasn't desiring a fight. He thought Cloud probably felt the same way, the fighter sure as hell didn't seem like a threat, his sword stuck to his back with no hint of it being used.
Everyone held their breaths, watching as Cloud lifted his head, eyes ignoring them when he looked up to the high ceiling like he knew what was up there. Something about his eyes, Isaac saw it, and remembered that look from his patients after going through trauma.
There was the look of dead in those eyes. Lifeless. Gone. Cloud had no light left in him, and Isaac felt it, the younger man standing there, appearing done with everything.
"I'm here for Sephiroth. It was what I was made to do," the fighter mumbled flatly.
Isaac lifted a brow, and Rufus dropped his gun, puzzled. Heidegger and Scarlet whispered to each other, and they all waited as Hojo rubbed his hands together.
"Cloud! Wait!"
Isaac watched all of Cloud's hooligan friends emerge from another path, the busty dark-haired one running up to him. She put her gloved hands around his arm and shouted, "Cloud, what's gotten in to you?!"
But Cloud just ignored her, or perhaps he didn't even notice her. He stepped forward, his arm free from her grasp, and gazed down at the Black Materia in his hand like it was calling to him. His spiky hair hid his eyes when he shared, "There is something I must do, in exchange for fulfilling my purpose."
Cloud lifted his face back up to the ceiling. And very quietly, Isaac heard him add, "She's lost in the Lifestream, calling to me."
Who was calling to him? Isaac's pulse quickened. It couldn't be.
"Who?" his female friend asked, strained at keeping her distance from the distressed fighter. She wrapped her arms around her waist, itching to grab hold of his arm again.
Cloud forced a small smile to no one in particular, not hearing her.
"I'm nothing, not even a real person. Even my memories aren't real. So, it's the least I can do. And then she'll have to fix all of this. I will take her place in the Lifestream. That's the only way I can save her." His voice dropped, talking even quieter when he finished, "That's all I want now."
He turned to his friends, his fake smile still there, and it laid a horrid chill across the group.
"I'm sorry, everyone."
There were puzzled expressions, grumbles from his crew. Isaac didn't know what the fuck was happening. Cloud acting like he was about to walk into his grave, apologizing and ignoring his friends, too stuck on self loathing and depressed like an emo kid. Isaac glared at the kid and shook his head. He better not be doing what Isaac thought he was doing.
Cloud finally took notice of his female friend, and whispered to her, "Especially you, Tifa. I'm so sorry. I hope you can meet the real Cloud, someday."
In response, Tifa covered her ears. She shook her head, trying to dispel all the words he just told her, to get out of her mind, but it was no use.
"No, that's not true!" And she dropped her knees to the crystal floor, the light too, fading from her amber eyes.
"This is splendid! My experiment is complete!" Hojo exclaimed, oblivious to the hard feelings felt in the room.
Rufus glared his hateful eyes at his research employee.
"What the hell are you talking about? Are you saying Cloud was one of your experiments, too? Who haven't you experimented on, you sick fuck?" Rufus spat with disgust. Scarlet and Heidegger chuckled in the background, and Hojo frowned heavily at the President.
"He was one of the survivors in the Nibelheim fire. I dissembled his body and put it back together, adding Jenova cells and Mako into his body in hopes to make another Sephiroth," Hojo explained happily. Isaac wrinkled his nose at Hojo's hungry expression, and a cold shiver crept up into his mechanical spine.
Cloud approached the scientist, and asked lamely, "Hojo, you never gave me a number. Please, please give me a number."
Hojo lifted a dark eyebrow.
"What? I never gave you a tattoo? But I tattoo all my experiments," and with that, Isaac caught Hojo's secret glance at him. Isaac broke away from such a disgusting look, Hojo pleased with himself. Isaac knew full well where his god-damn tattoo was.
Cloud shook his head.
"No. Nothing."
Hojo crossed his arms furiously at that lame answer.
"Then you must've been a failed experiment. What a waste to have you here to fulfill my Jenova Reunion Theory."
Hojo gave Cloud his hunched back, and the fighter sullenly sighed. Isaac wasn't sure what Aqua ever saw in such a character, someone who never seemed sure of himself, who didn't even know he was an experiment all along, someone poisoned with Mako and alien cells, toyed with for Hojo's sick fetishes.
Cloud was given the cold shoulder by his old master, and his shoulders sank.
"Then I must go. Sephiroth is waiting for me," and he looked up as though the silver haired nightmare was glaring down at him. Isaac and the rest of them followed his eyes, and up there, incased in a large green crystal, was none other than Sephiroth.
The real Sephiroth.
Isaac gasped, tensing up at the sight of the legend, a centerpiece to a gigantic chandelier made up of Materia.
"So, Sephiroth is here! The Lifestream couldn't take him after all, not with the Jenova cells. Then my theory is true."
"What theory?" Rufus dared ask under his breath.
But before Hojo could answer, Isaac stepped forward, walking up to Cloud.
"Hey," Isaac barked.
Cloud heard that, and he barely considered Isaac, looking over his shoulder at him before finally, slowly turning. His Mako eyes brightened, and Isaac saw it, traces of life left as hate in those eyes, craving a fight. But the troubled man tightened his hold on his Materia instead, his hand shaking with it.
Isaac glared at Cloud, their eyes pretty even leveled when he stopped inches from him.
"You aren't thinking of bringing Aqua back, are you?"
Cloud narrowed his eyes, but then his anger sank, life gone once more.
"She's lost in the Lifestream, I know that. I hear her."
Isaac clenched his teeth. "Well, I don't hear anything."
Cloud flashed a hint of his turmoil towards Isaac, his muscles tensing.
"No, you wouldn't, would you?" He ridiculed at the cyborg. Isaac felt insulted, and he grabbed at Cloud's collar.
"I know her better than you do," he said through his teeth, pulling Cloud in closer, but something sparked, and Isaac's hand was zapped off. He hissed from the hot pain, his hand sizzling, and he stepped back, unsure as to how the man could hurt him so easily. Cloud's body darkened, the Black Materia in his possession, and it spread little currents of black lightning around him. His blond hair fluttered up, and his eyes glowed directly at Isaac.
"You keep telling yourself that," Cloud finalized, his voice different, and to everyone's shock, he flew up to the Sephiroth crystal.
He sat beside it, curled into a ball, as Hojo cleared his throat.
"He's a Sephiroth-clone I created after the real Sephiroth died five years ago.
Jenova cells and Mako, with my knowledge and skills, have been combined with science and nature to bring him to life. I'm not wild about the failure part, but the Jenova Reunion Theory has now been proven. You see, even if Jenova's body is dismembered, it will eventually become one again. That's what is meant by Jenova's Reunion. I have been waiting for the Reunion to start. Five years have passed, and now the Clones have begun to return."
"I thought the clones would begin to gather at Midgar where Jenova is stored.
But my predictions were not entirely correct. Jenova itself began to move away from the Shinra Building. But being a genius that I am, I soon figured it out. You see, it was all Sephiroth's doing. Sephiroth is not just content to diffuse his will into the Lifestream; he wants to manipulate the Clones himself."
Isaac already knew all that, but to hear it again, he was still a little lost, unsure as to why someone would toy with an alien specimen and inject her cells into almost anyone. It made Sephiroth, so maybe there was high chance for another brilliant fighter? Isaac feared the drive turned Hojo mad, unless the scientist was mad to begin with.
"I was wondering where the clones were going. I could never figure it out until now. So, they were coming here, summoned by Sephiroth himself, to bring him the Black Materia. And to think, my failed experiment, the blond kid, succeeded."
Hojo then cackled and Isaac glared at him before growling, "This isn't funny."
Rufus kept quiet, Isaac unaware that he was being observed the whole time, and he suddenly realized he knew he shouldn't have confronted Cloud like that, not in front of Rufus. That would show his weakness, and he tried to pretend he had none, though it didn't matter anymore with Aqua gone.
Even so, when Rufus smiled, it somehow brought a tightening sensation to Isaac's abdomen where he thought he still had his gut.
Cloud unfurled, standing tall before Sephiroth's crystal prison, his naked body frozen in place. Gently, the Black Materia was edged inside as Tifa screamed.
"Cloud, no!"
But it was too late.
The Black Materia shot out black sparks, and a sudden pulse erupted in the cave.
Large eyes suddenly opened behind the crystal walls, and everyone gasped.
The Weapons of the Planet were stirring.
"No way!" Scarlet cried, knowing what they were from her studies of weapons. Her designs were based on Professor Gast's old reports, and she became too excited to finally be able to witness the Giga-monsters awakening. The whole crater shook, and crystals fell from the ceiling, cracking into the earth to open up the Lifestream.
Cloud fell into it.
Isaac's eyes widened, shocked to see that the spiky haired man gone. He was actually gone.
"I don't quite understand the situation here, but let us all hurry to my ship!" Rufus exclaimed when the quake increased. Everything began to fall into the Lifestream when they ran in time.
Isaac remembered escaping from a massive Mako blast inside the crater, taking Cloud's friends on their ship. He witnessed it all, the freedom of massive weapon-like creatures pulling out of the explosive earth as though summoned from Hell. Five creatures. Five massive threats.
One of them was so enormous, it made the airship look like a little toy, able to fit in its claws. Isaac was amazed at such power when the weapons fled, leaving a trail of energy behind it, enough to rattle the airship almost to its downfall.
"It was Cloud's fault. He was the reason Sephiroth has been able to summon meteor," Isaac finished, his eyes sinking to the dark ocean. I laid my hands against the warm glass, trying to decipher the whole story while catching a glimpse of the glowing red meteor.
"And for eight days now, it's just brewing up there? Growing as it pulls in smaller planets and rock?" I muttered.
Isaac stood behind me, and he nodded.
"Sephiroth was Jenova all along. He was using her body to maneuver throughout the land, to try to snatch the Black Materia and take it to his original body. How he fell into the Lifestream in the first place, isn't clear. But he did die five years ago."
My hands left marks along the glass when I felt them moistened, slowly sweating.
"And because of Jenova's cells, Sephiroth was able to manipulate Cloud into giving him the Black Materia. It isn't entirely Cloud's fault," I argued solemnly.
Isaac hissed, trembling so hard with an inner rage for that man, he couldn't hold himself anymore, and slammed a hand onto the glass window over my head.
It slightly startled me, and he then rattled, "Are you joking? Are you so in love with him that it's left you blind? Is that it?"
I remained facing the window, not wanting to turn and look into the rage that simmered in Isaac. He was always ill-tempered. Quietly, I shook my head, remaining calm.
"No, that's not it. But I do love him."
I finally looked over my shoulder at Isaac, finding his furious expression close to my gentle one, and I added softly, "I do, Isaac. I love him so much. Even if he's dead, I feel like I will never be able to replace him. Not with Rufus. No one. Not even... with you," I confessed, not wanting to lead Isaac into any corners or give him the wrong idea.
Is this what Aerith felt like losing her love? Aerith, how did you manage to smile? To laugh? How did you do anything?
Isaac's fingers curled against the glass.
"Not even me?" He double-checked.
I shook my head and retreated to the darkness behind the window.
"No, Isaac. Not even you. I love you. But, not like I do Cloud," I admitted, and hoped that Isaac understood that. He deserved to know.
Isaac's hand slowly came to my shoulder, and I heard hom sigh into the back of my hair until he rested his forehead against it.
"I know," he whispered. My eyes widened, not expecting him to agree. His fist softened, pulled back from the window, grazing pass my head and landed to my other shoulder.
"I know you love him, more than you ever loved me. I was in denial of that for a long time, but, I need to stop lying to myself now. Even if that's true, I..."
Over my head, he looked at me through the glass window, pain in his eyes, and we locked there. For a minute, with only his face seen over my head, I thought we were back to our normal days. Back to fretting about our privileged lives in New York, stressing over little things like what to have for dinner and what show to watch.
I could see how Isaac's eyes held a passionate flame to them, the Mako completely gone, and he reached straight into his heart.
"I've never stopped loving you, Aqua. Even when I did hurt you, it was because I loved you more than anything else in the world. And losing you to someone else, hurt so bad, I was consumed by so many awful feelings. And as a result, I've hurt you."
His hands squeezed a little tighter as he dipped his head into my hair, hiding his eyes from his reflection, and he trembled.
"I'm so sorry I was cruel to you."
Even with his cold, metal hands, and metal body pressed agains the back of mine, I felt warm, holding myself to pretend that his human body was holding me.
I smiled just a little, barely even a grin when my eyes moistened, but it was something, and I gave it to Isaac in the reflection, like staring at ghosts of ourselves with a black world behind them.
"I forgive you," I whimpered, taking a hand to meet with one of his. Isaac clenched his teeth, fighting back tears, but I felt a wetness growing in the back of my head.
"I can't stand it, Aqua. This place. This world. I know I've sent you back home, but I hate to admit it, I'm so glad to see you again. You're my only friend here."
And he curled his arms around my shoulders, his head dipping over my shoulder with a shaky sigh. Tears fell, cold to the touch when they tapped on my skin.
I didn't know what to say, until I knew it was best not to say anything at all. My hands clasped around Isaac's cold, metal arms, letting him stay close as long as he needed.
However, my physiology had different plans. The evening sickness boiled in my stomach. As soon as it reached my throat, I had to pull away.
"I'm sorry!" I cried, holding my hands to my lips, and retreated to the restroom to collapse my face into the toilet.
I held my hair back as I ralphed, legs sprawled on the pristine, black marble floor. When I flushed the horrible mess away, I leaned my forehead against the toilet seat, my hand clutching to my stomach, and groaned with discomfort. The burning ache of stomach acid lingered in my throat, and it felt to continue to boil, the potential for more. For a minute, I've lost track of Isaac. When I remembered, my eyes grew in the toilet bowl, until I was brave enough to look over my shoulder.
Isaac stood there in the doorway, the look on his face filled with dread. His pupils dilated, lips left slightly open. As a pediatrician, following in neurology, it wasn't a surprise that his medical mind jumped straight to the question he tried to ask me.
"Aqua, are you...?" He couldn't say it, stuck in too much disbelief, but I knew what he wanted to ask.
I looked away after I had enough of his grim expression, leaning my forehead back to my arms around the toilet bowl.
When I said nothing, I heard his voice shake.
"But that's imposs-!"
And suddenly, he screamed, his whole body covered in electrical sparks.
I froze on the bathroom floor, silently screaming as I watched Isaac bend over backwards, his open lips up to the ceiling to let his painful cries escape. Blue sparks, hundreds of them, gave his body spasms, as though he was being jolted by a powerful spell of lightning. The next thing I knew, he was face down on the floor, with tiny grey clouds of smoke sizzling from his suit.
"And that's the hard way," Rufus dropped in, standing behind a fallen Isaac while he held his phone. I shook as I couldn't keep my eyes off Isaac, and my hand couldn't stop shaking when it reached, touching his soft hair.
"Isaac?"
He didn't move.
"Isaac?!" I whimpered, his face so close to my knees, but I didn't feel him breathe.
Rufus put away his phone into his pant pocket as he turned his head to perhaps, the door, and pointed to Isaac's fallen body. Suddenly, two Shinra troops trampled in, taking Isaac with the pull of his metal arms. His face stayed limp, hiding into his chest as he was dragged out.
"I thought it was odd. If there's one thing I know about Zero, it's that he never initiates an intimate moment with Scarlet. Now I know why. He finished with her early and came to see you before the meeting was over. Clever," Rufus was saying, shrugging as though he was just finished scolding a child. But I was shaking so hard, teeth pressed together, glaring at the floor until my ears were ringing.
My fingers tried to dig into the tile, but they curled tightly instead, digging nails deep into my palms.
"What's your problem? What's so bad about us having a talk, you sadistic asshole," I grumbled, tears falling to the floor. My body heated, but nothing could escape. No magic, nothing. I thought I would implode. A horrible burning feeling traveled through my blood vessels with quick effort, but with nowhere to go. I began to sweat, some of my hair sticking to my cheeks.
Rufus's shoes clicked as he neared. I saw them enter into my vision, and then the knees of his white pants. A cold hand gripped my chin, and without consideration, yanked my face up, making me look into his sadistic smile. I've never seen such cold eyes before, a look of old and new pain, of being raised with privilege and yet, loss buried so deep, not even he could see it.
"If you play fair with me, I won't hurt him. Better yet, I won't kill him. With Cloud and most of the threat of Avalanche gone, I don't need much of Zero around anymore. One more flaw, one more mistake, and I won't hesitate to end his pathetic life," Rufus soothed. His other hand began to rub gently with his fingers down my cheek, as though he was unaware of the internal pain he was inflicting on me by just his words. He was a psychopath.
Sweat dripped from my forehead, trailing down between my eyes, and Rufus rubbed a thumb there while he endured my deep glare, but that was all I could do. I didn't want Isaac to die. He was the only one I had left.
Soon, my eyes softened, and I bit my lower lip to fight back possible curses, remaining a mute. Rufus's smile widened, and he pulled his hand back, his trimmed nails scraped against my cheeks.
"That's better. Now..."
He rose, standing over me, and I suddenly felt like a submissive, little weakling.
"Let's go to bed, shall we?"
I stayed as far away from him as possible, lying curled up to my side of the King bed. Thankfully, Rufus was too exhausted to make any more attempts that evening, left to falling asleep quickly on his side.
It felt wrong. It felt so wrong and so sickening to be lying in the same bed with him. I cried silently in my pillow, wishing not to feel so worthless and so filthy. Sharing the same covers with him. His markings burning holes in my skin. It was all so revolting.
Flashbacks brought me to Gold Saucer for the first time, sitting next to Cloud as he warned me.
What if he uses Isaac against you? Rufus will harm him if you don't meet his demands? What then?
Cloud, you were right. Rufus is using Isaac against me, and I haven't thought of what to do about it. What should I do? What would you tell me to do if you were here?
No answers from the darkness.
Isaac's old ring laid safely in one of my shoes, and I thought of it glistening by what little light leaked into the room from the outside world, and under the front door. Its little diamonds shimmering, remnants of a past still lost in them.
I closed my eyes, but images of Isaac lying somewhere in a cell or on a cement floor, plagued my thoughts. Is that how Rufus tortures him? Having him zapped like all of his body was under a bolt of lightning, until he passed out? Did that mean Rufus has the power to just shut Isaac off completely if he wanted to? So far, Isaac seemed to survive every possible causality in his way, easily fixed back up again. He survived Sephiroth's blade multiple times, Vincent's gunshot, and Cloud's sword.
But Rufus held the ultimate death sentence in his hands, right from his phone, like some program registered to Isaac's core.
I pulled the silk blankets higher over me, but I was still shaking from the cold. Not even my new pajamas could keep me warm, though with what little I'm given to wear, it wasn't surprising.
All through the night, I thought of Isaac, of Aerith, and of Cloud. I've also wondered how Tifa and the others were doing. Were they going to try to stop Sephiroth? Or go their separate ways? Was fighting Sephiroth pointless? Was it all up to Rufus and his powerful influence now? How was I helping by lying here? What could I do?
I rolled to look up at the high ceiling, no longer finding Aerith up there, or in a corner or in the middle of the hallway. Somehow, having a small reunion with her in the Lifestream, helped me get rid of her death haunting me. Now I just saw nothing.
I rammed the palms of my hands over my eyes until I saw stars.
Aerith, I can't do this. Please, if you can hear my silent prayer, please, give me a direction. I don't know what to do.
My hands slid away, and still, only a white ceiling in heavy shadow. Nothing.
Fed up with the emptiness above, I rolled onto my side, and sniffed back tears, clutching to my pillow.
Since falling into this world the first time, I've never felt so lost before until now. Even on that first night, I knew Cloud was just next door. I still had a fighting spirit to find my way back home. Now, slowly, I was feeling the life fade from me. My stomach twisted slightly, reminding me that there was someone else to worry about. And that made me feel even all the more guilty.
I'm trying, but how long can I last?
60