8

The Wedding

It's been one week since Isaac died.

One week, and I've felt nothing.

One week, and I ate, but tasted nothing. I've considered others' faces, but saw nothing. I've felt Rufus's lips touch mine, but they seemed cold and lifeless. Not even feeling his hands when they traced soft lines along my cheeks, nor when they teased at my shoulders.

When he told me at one point, "I don't like you like this," I heard nothing.

His voice slipped through my ears, not even stirring a flicker.

I've attended the meetings, but wasn't really listening, turned into nothing but a silent figure at Rufus's side.

I moved. I walked. I ate, drank, muttered, blinked, all of that. But it was like moving through a thick, dark fog. My body was on autopilot. The real me curled behind a void, watching it all happen out of my control, a coward to the painful world while resting quietly and sobbing alone inside my dark soul.

There were a few times when I had a glimmer of something, a peak of interest to engage with the world, to do something off a carved path. Like the time when I saw myself in the mirror. It happened after another morning sickness episode.

I glanced at my reflection, and instantly became disappointed at what I saw. Eyes as fogged as the Mako mist that hovers over the bay in the mornings. There was nothing in there. No one was home.

My face was blurry, but my hair, it was long, and too beautiful, a handful to manage. I collected it in my hand, puzzled by it as though I couldn't believe it was truly mine, an out of a body experience as though I was in a body that didn't belong to me. Something about feeling detached from my flesh, too absent. Like I had a minute of coming back to the world and taking in my desire, I took a pair of scissors from a drawer, and began to cut. By the time I was done, half the floor was covered in white hair, some in the black, marble sink.

Rufus took one step in, and froze. He kept his cool, but I could detect the distaste in his tone when he said, "All right, enough of this nonsense."

I felt a rough pull of my wrist, yanked out of the bathroom. Obediently, I followed, until hard hands pushed me to sit on the end of the bed.

Blurry blue eyes came into view, and by the shoulders, I was shaken roughly from cold hands.

"Aqua, snap out of it! I can't stand you like this! Where's your fighting spirit? Your stubbornness? Where did that blunt girl go?"

Well, what did he expect?

I shook my head at Rufus, able to hear him, but none of his words hit anymore. It was like throwing marshmallows against glass. None of them will get through.

Rufus's hands tightened, and he dropped to his knees, his head falling into my lap along with his hair hiding his eyes.

"I didn't mean to have it turn out like this," I heard him tremble. It seemed dreamy, finding him on his knees, his hands slipping away to fall towards my thighs.

"I've been good to you. Since the loss of Zero and Scarlet, I've made no more attempt to have my way with you," his distant voice shook. It was no use. I heard him, but still nothing.

It's no use, Rufus.

I told myself that, curled tight in my darkness as I watched him fall apart from the permanent damage he's done. He had an obedient fiancée, someone no longer willing to fight him, taking each day passively. Isn't that what he wanted?

"Isn't this what you wanted?" I mumbled, my inside voice slipping through my lips.

Rufus shook his head, his forehead rubbing against my knees. His fingers curled tight along my long green skirt.

"I don't know," he rattled. For the first time, he sounded so uncertain. He took the quiet moment to think, eyes closed, as I let him dwell in silence. Behind closed doors, Rufus had a pause to slip, to appear more human than some dominating, focused leader, and I was unaware how blessed I was to see it. But he was unfamiliar with letting his walls fall, even if just for a minute, for he eventually cleared his throat, and rose to stand tall again, back to his cold self. He fixed his white tie in place, wearing a long, navy blazer slumped over his shoulders like a cloak. And he sighed after taking another long look, down at me, like a king does to a servant, not of love nor respect.

"If it weren't for those bracers, you would've destroyed Junon," and he pointed to the cracked bracers left around my forearms. Their tiny needles nested stubbornly through my skin, numbing my arms easily if I flexed my muscles there.

"It just shows me of what my future children will be capable of," he ended, as though it was on his script, and he turned to walk away with a hiss, done with me.

"I'll send for a barber to fix that dreadful hair of yours. I don't want you to look like a mess tomorrow," he added over his shoulder, as he walked across his room. Technically, it was our room. I was never given my own place, Rufus made certain of that.

But with the new me limping through the halls of Junon like some permanently injured creature, he left me sleeping in peace for all the nights we've had together thus far. No hands reaching, no lips wandering, nor being pushed to the floor, nothing since the first night.

Isaac's death kept me safe from Rufus wanting me, a difficult exchange.

A little later that day, I walked slowly across the airfield, Reeve accompanying me. Not allowed to be alone, Reeve was left as my babysitter, trailing along my heels as I wandered towards the edge of where I was one week earlier.

When we got closer, Reeve took my hand suddenly.

"Aqua, what are you doing?!" He cried, afraid I was going to jump over.

But I shook my head slowly, the hazy Mako fog slithering up from the sea's green surface, merging into the pink sky as some brown and orange curtain. Standing there a few feet away, I observed the horizon carefully, the sun slowly setting behind thin brown clouds.

"Don't worry, Reeve. I'm not going to throw myself over," I assured him in a dead voice. He still kept a hold of my hand, even as I took another step. I felt his grip tensing, fearful that he was going to have to pull me away.

The afternoon breeze brushed back our hair, Reeve standing a foot behind my shoulder.

He, too, was poring over the view, his face scrunched into an uncomfortable expression. Maybe Reeve wanted to jump. Maybe he wanted to test his limits and leap off the edge, arms out and waiting to see if he will fly to his freedom, or to have death be his salvation. Instead, he stayed put, but I noticed how he clenched his jaws muscles, his loose, dark hair tossed back. He sighed through his nose, and I felt his hand squeeze mine a little more.

"I'm sorry about Ze- I mean, Isaac," he whispered, dropping his dead, work eyes to the calm water.

I shook my head again, taking in the warm breeze blowing at my face. My hair had been tended to, barely long enough to tickle my chin as it fluffed behind my ears. It turned into a white, blond short bob cut, thanks to a hair stylist Rufus hurriedly hired.

I felt lighter. Who knew how much of my hair was holding me down? Could I float up to Meteor if I jumped off? Was I light enough?

"It's okay, Reeve," I muttered, looking down at my free hand lifting its curled palm up to my empty face.

My fingers pulled back, revealing my engagement ring from Isaac, as I finished, "It's not your fault."

Reeve's guilty eyes dropped to the ring, lower lip falling, but he kept his bewildered thoughts to himself.

Even the diamonds no longer sparkled. Like my eyes, they lacked any light, the gold band dull and white gems intact but as flat as my expression when I gazed at them all. Nothing stirred, not even my heart was thumping to it.

This is for you,my inside voice whispered, curled up like a lost child in the dark. I held the ring up to my chest, to see if my heart would finally wake up to it, and I even closed my eyes, pretending to feel the ring pulse with me. For just a glimpse, I heard him.

I'm not afraid anymore.

Neither am I, Isaac.

I observed the ring one last time, just a little thing in my palm, weighing no more than a quarter.

Expectedly, visions of my past flared to life.

In the middle of Central Park, on an early summer evening when the sky was a similar color to this one in Junon, Isaac got on one knee.

I was petrified, feeling the urge to run in the opposite direction. But there he was, opening the teal box with a dry crack sound, and what sat inside, waiting for me, shimmered the engagement ring.

Selfishly, my first thought was, is this guy crazy? We've only been dating for six months.

I could barely hear his words over my protesting thoughts.

"Aqua." Isaac grabbed my attention when he used my name, and then he cleared his throat, cheeks as pink as the setting sun. There were a few dog walkers, joggers, and couples around. A few ducks quacked in the distance, along with pigeons cooing, park performers and chatter all orchestrated as the park's symphony in the background.

But not as vibrating as Isaac's words when he asked me, "Will you marry me?"

I blinked uncontrollably and spat out in disbelief, unable to decide to smile or not.

"Isaac," I gasped, my body growing hot.

I never thought ahead of us, never past a week of our relationship. Now I had to look beyond months, years even. But I bravely jumped off the edge of uncertainty.

"Yes, of course," I smiled, and Isaac gladly slipped me the gold ring with many diamonds on it, its queen of them glistening under the falling sun. I was so lost in admiration over the large diamond, I was caught off guard when Isaac swooped me in his arms, my bare legs kicking up in the air under my shorts. He spun me around as he laughed excitedly, my hair whirling into his face. That smile of his was no secretive plot, but peer bliss.

He was just a man deeply in love.

By the time I fell back to the present, I found my cheeks wet. I was surprised I could still cry, and I've been apparently doing it for a few minutes during my dive in the memory. My eyes dropped back to the ring in my hand, and I tasted salty tears on my tongue while taking note of the large diamond, and snapped a mind photo.

Without another thought, I tossed it.

Reeve gasped, his words jammed inside his lips. He finally let go of me just to reach, as though his weak attempt was enough to snatch the ring in midair, but his hands grasped nothing, taking caution just a few feet away from his potential fall. He was confident I wasn't going to jump over, but I thought about it as I watched the ring plunge towards the water, until I couldn't see it anymore.

Rough waves ate it up easily, sucking it into the largest belly on the Planet.

I wish I knew how much you actually loved me. I'm sorry I was so careless.

I heard it clearly, as though he was right behind me, and I thought I felt a warm hand on my shoulder.

My eyes expanded, and there was a flicker. My inner self gasped, my head perked, ears open to hear his voice again. Without hesitation, I twirled around, expecting Isaac to be there.

But he wasn't.

"Aqua?" Reeve pried, observant.

The flicker went out, and I sank my head a little, shoulders falling farther down to the floor. My inner self dropped her head back over her knees with a long sigh. My eyes dimmed once more.

"He's returning to the Planet," I whispered. Not exactly to Reeve but more for reassuring myself. Isaac was in a better place. With Cloud and Aerith.

It was strange how I've thought I've heard Aerith on a few occasions, or maybe it was just the wind playing tricks on me. Even now, I ached to hear her voice when I thought I just heard Isaac, but how could I be confident? And what's more dismal, wind or not, I've never felt Cloud's presence, if that made any sense. His voice was only from memory, and even so, I could achingly feel him slowly fading away. I pictured all three of them there on the airfield with me, their ghosts standing as glass sculptures of themselves, watching me decide what I should do.

My eyes adjusted, the ghosts vanishing, when, finally, I took notice to the many workers setting up for tomorrow's event. Chairs were being unfolded, set row after row. A red carpet unrolled. White ribbons hang loose. Long, white tables setting up. There was no denying it as I watched my fate unfold before me. No matter where my spirit was, lost in a wasteland or sucked out of me, Rufus was going to have his wedding. My stomach twisted slightly, taking my hands to it, and something fluttered under my fingers.

Reeve was taking note of the set up among the airfield, hands slipping into his dark suit's pockets.

"Tomorrow's the big day," he muttered, his eyes hardening. "How do you feel?"

I blinked my eyes away from the reminder, pulling them back to the orange sea and sky where I'd prefer to be. As fragments of Cloud slipped through my ominous thoughts, there was a touch of something trying to reach for me in the dark, a hand, but I couldn't quite see it. Blinded by the shadow that engulfed me, I didn't notice, and remained lifeless.

"It is what it is," I muttered.

My eyes looked up to Meteor, no longer moved by its flourishing threat. Since I've gazed upon it the first time, the time bomb has grown twice its size, permanently bleeding a part of the sky in a crimson red tint, as though slowly injuring it.

I simply blinked at it.

"It doesn't matter anymore."

...

Night fell.

Another dinner with Rufus, but in our apartment instead of in one of those dining halls where I usually felt small. I ate, but unsure as to what I was taking into my mouth, simply chewing and eating without thought. Rufus may have been watching me the whole time, making sure I was dressed appropriately to his high standards. Since my hair was cut nice and short, he had a good view of my long neck, his old marks gone.

I was given a small white dress to wear, as though to tell me quietly what was coming tomorrow, feeling cold under its thin straps.

Rufus noticed I never drank the wine, and how I seemed to lay a hand over my belly from time to time, but he didn't mention anything about it since I've been here. I could tell he's been gathering data, sorting it all in his head as he took a sip of a bitter Cabernet to go with his thin cut of steak.

Dinner was never relaxing when we were always perched close to the windows, Meteor always there looking over my shoulder, making itself known selfishly.

Rufus seemed less affected by it, and he settled back in his chair, eying me across the small table.

"I'm afraid there won't be a honeymoon. Two days after the wedding, we launch the rocket to Meteor," he told me, though I already knew this.

I only nodded, chewing my steak quietly. A part of me wanted to come out for a bit and simply tell him it won't work, but I knew it wasn't worth the effort. Rufus had his hopes. Let him spend his money and the public's money on his wishful thinking.

Not getting much of a response from me, Rufus put down his fork and knife with a sigh.

He straightened himself in his chair, appearing more callus than usual. His white fingers quietly loosened his evening black tie and opened a few buttons of his black dress shirt, exposing the top of his pale and bare chest to the warm lamp above us.

"I've been patient with you, given the state you've been in," Rufus began. I focused on his eyes clearing, finding them pouring fire into my neck like a vampire thirsty for my blood. I stiffened, fork frozen with a green bean inches from my lips.

Rufus smirked, pleased with my response.

"That's the most I've seen from you in a while." And he rose from his chair.

"You see, I've been patient," he mused, walking slowly, like a predator circling his prey. I stayed glued to my chair, holding in my breath even as he came in from behind. His hands slipped over my shoulders, cold fingers toying with my straps.

"It makes me wonder if you will fight me this time. Show me if your spirit is still in there, somewhere," Rufus uttered under his breath close to my ear. His hands slowly pulled down my straps, his touch more carnal than usual. I bit my lower lip hard, freezing to how his hands rubbed my arms and neck with rough eagerness, fingers tracing along the scar Cloud left me way back at the temple.

Cold lips planted on my bare shoulder, and I sucked in a small gasp.

"I've waited long enough," Rufus warned, his teeth lightly biting at my neck. More of his teeth traveled up my ear until he nibbled on its lobe. There was not a trace of the Rufus that leaked earlier, even if it was just for a minute, leaving me to wonder if it was all just an illusion. It came and went too quickly, a very rare sighting.

Disappointed, I fell inward, not feeling him, but not fighting him either. In the darkness, I whimpered,Please, Rufus, don't do this now. Don't force your way on a dead, walking woman.

And I curled into myself, hiding my eyes into my knees from the wretched scene slowly unfolding. I couldn't watch.

No reaction and Rufus sighed hotly into my ear.

"Nothing, huh?" He huffed.

It was another game to him. How far does he have to go before I show any resistance? Is he getting warmer? How about here? Or here? It reminded me of one of those childish games I watched teenagers play, the game of how far a hand will go before the player says "stop."

I would've stopped Rufus already, but there was hardly any point. There was nothing hanging over my head except my dignity and growing child. Of course, I didn't know this at the time, Rufus was testing me, already keen on what was going on, but needed confirmation, or more like a confession. His hands slipped down, across my collar bones into my dress, and he shuddered when he cupped my breasts.

I swallowed, trying to numb my whole body from telling me what was happening.

This amused Rufus, of course.

"Still nothing," he whispered, kissing my ear while his hands squeezed lightly.

"I will gladly keep going then."

As his hands pulled back, I closed my eyes, wishing for Reeve to knock on the door or a phone to ring. But in the unwanted quiet, Rufus took my chin, and turned my head into his. His head perched over my shoulder, and kissed me hard.

Lack of my response made him only try to dig deeper, his tongue rammed so far into my mouth, or his teeth gently bitting onto my lower lip. He tasted like his wine and steak, with a hint of cigar. Rufus pulled back, trying to latch my eyes with his, but I kept mine stuck to nothing, even when they were looking right at him, I didn't see his icy blue eyes. All I saw was just my inner me hiding from him, whimpering in the dark, giving up.

Suddenly, a rough hand took my arm, and I was pulled out of my chair. I almost stumbled, feeling a bit thrown off as he dragged me across the room.

"If you are this obedient, I should've done this a long time ago. I've let you wallow in your depression long enough," Rufus simmered, his blurry face difficult to read, even when I squinted up to it to analyze behind the dark fog.

He shoved me hard, and I fell on the bed. Before I could get back up, he was already on top of me, hands pulling up my dress.

It wasn't until cold fingers began to tug my underwear, that I began to flutter awake. My eyes blinked, finally registering what was happening. Rufus unbuckled his belt and unzipped his pants. His hands were as hard as stone, his kisses rough, the way he yanked and pulled. Everything about him was as though he wanted to tear me apart, and I began to wake up, at least briefly. Not because I was scared to keep clean from Rufus's filth, but for my child. I worried about how turbulent he would be as his hands split my thighs apart.

In a blink, I reached, taking his wrist to stop him.

"Rufus, no!"

But he came forward, trying to ram himself inside, when I began to squirm my hips under him, his hard hands pinning mine to the bed.
In the darkness, I stood up and jumped into the real world, taking over before it was too late.

Panicked, I screamed the words that I've held inside for so long, shattering the foggy glass that I've kept between us. I knew it would stop him, my last effort to keep him from plunging his foulness into me.

"I'm already pregnant!"

Rufus paused.

I began to sweat under him, feeling his heart pulse hard against my chest, heat collecting behind my neck as I saw his face clearly for the first time in a week.

He just looked down at me, a solid statue gazing into my anxious eyes. I could hardly feel his chest move, his breathing small, if any breaths were taken at all. His hands held mine still, every hair and cloth fiber in a frozen state.

But his diamond eyes toughened, reading mine with a bit of discerning contentment, his lips pressed together.

It was a difficult pause to dread, leaving me desperate to read Rufus's thoughts as he mulled like an old wine, taking his time to decide how to react.

His hands reacted first, squeezing mine tighter, fingers between fingers until my bones started to ache.

And then he sighed, "Just as I thought."

Just like that, Rufus retreated, taking his body, his hands, and his selfish passion with him to the end of the bed.

On high alert, I watched him carefully, anxiety creeping into my chest while I urgently fixed my dress. Rufus stood, zipped his pants and buckled his belt back in place.

"I've had high suspicion of it for a while, but just needed you to tell me, or to show, whichever came first," he muttered, keeping his back to me.

Rufus got the confession he wanted, acting aggressive to get it from me. I've felt manipulated.

I pierced my fingernails into the grey covers, afraid to ask him what he was going to do with me now. There was this slight hope that maybe, Rufus will call off the wedding. Or even let me go. The more I thought about it, the more childish I've felt to keep it from him this long, if it meant my release. My purpose to him is flawed, leaving me with nothing to give. There was no point keeping me here.

On guard, I planted a firm hand over my small belly, barely anything but a firm, trace of a growing bowling ball under my dress.

"Who?"

Rufus hissed the question so sharp and sudden, I've missed it, and jolted my head up to still see the back of his black shirt.

"What?"

I watched how he took in a deep breath, and slowly, his hands collected in the pockets of his silver dress pants. One of his almond toed, leather shoes tapped once, and he asked again.

"Who is it? The one who did this to you," he fumed, barely looking over his shoulder to mutter the words harshly to me.

My legs tucked under me as I fluttered between the darkness and my awake state. I wanted to escape, the feelings of worry too real, and I was beginning to feel them numb my hands and feet. For a time, I was awake, and suspicious.

But it didn't matter who was the father, not to Rufus. He can look high and low, and he will never find him. Never.

To him or to myself, I shook my head, trying not to dwell too far in my depressing thoughts when images of Cloud appeared. I saw him standing in the rain with me, his eyes begging me to stay when I thought of leaving. The glooming rain patting hard, dribbling clean water over his slumped blond hair, how his eyes glowed behind wet strands of his bangs, like he was readying for battle. Why that memory surfaced, I had no answer. Maybe I still had hope. Similar to when Cloud went after me in the rain, secretly, I've hoped he would come for me again, finding me in this endless black rain I was stuck in. Slowly but surely, I was sinking back into myself, the dark waters of my inner shadows pulling me in.

As I sank back even further, I made an attempt to reach, half hoping his hand would appear.

But as expected, there was nothing.

"It doesn't matter. He's dead," I whispered, the numbing world returning. It was better to retreat than to stay with Rufus, unaware of the tiny growth inside my belly trying to stir me to stay awake.

"What?" Rufus finally looked at me, his golden eyebrows narrowed.

"Are you saying it's Cloud's?" And he fully turned around. "But how?"

I was stunned to discover Rufus more captivated than upset. To my astonishment, he carried himself composed, and calm, though I didn't realize as he spoke, he was already planning. Rufus's gears in his head were already turning as he said to me, "How is that possible? SOLDIERS, anyone poisoned with Mako, can't reproduce. The research has proven that multiple times. Not one, not even one slip. So, how come…" his fingers toyed with his chin, eyes distant as he began to pull his thoughts to himself.

"I see," he blinked away, as though I said something, and he was finally beginning to understand.

"It must be your Ancient blood. No research has ever been conducted of mating two organisms such as Mako infested humans and Ancients. I'm sure that Hojo will be interested about this, but…"

I stiffened at the mention of Hojo, but Rufus shook his head to his own thoughts.

"But he won't know of this. No one will," he insisted, his voice heavy as his serious eyes locked onto mine.

Too many questions rammed forward, leaving me unable to decide which to ask first as my eyes grew at Rufus's hard gaze, his ascetic face as smooth as marble.

"Wait-" I stumbled my words. "What will you do?" I trembled, becoming perplexed at where I sensed this was going.

Rufus swatted the air low with one of his white hands.

"Nothing."

A wave of disappointment sank me further into the bed. Or relief, I couldn't tell which it was.

"What?" Was all that could escape my lips.

Rufus cocked his head at me, frowning. In his eyes, there was disappointment, no doubt, but also stubbornness.

"Cloud and I have similar features. No one will suspect the child is anyone else's but mine," he proclaimed.

I blinked a few times, trying to follow. Was this man going to just go along with it? I couldn't believe my ears. My head shook back and forth, appalled at Rufus's idea.

"Rufus, I'm no use to you. I've even lied to you," I argued, trying to show the stubborn man how pointless it was to keep me on his chain.

Smack!

I gasped when a cold hand suddenly slapped at my cheek, forcing my head to turn as half my face quickly stung with what felt like frost bite. For a minute, Rufus's hand pushed away the dark fog, forcing me to blink up at him with watery eyes.

He already recoiled his arm back, hand inside his pocket like he's never even struck me, and kept his careful diamond stare on mine.

"Don't devalue yourself to me," he warned, his chin tilting to the high ceiling as though he wanted to picture me falling smaller.

"I always get what I bloody want," he said as he took a step forward, blocking a ceiling lamp with his head. Shadow stretched across his cold-blooded face and formal attire. Rufus may not have glowing, Mako eyes, but he didn't have to, not with the way that they stared, sharp and shimmery like a diamond sword.

"What happens to your unborn child, is yet, undecided, but know this: It just means it will only be a matter of time before you carry mine. This is too rare of an opportunity to let go, whether it be for research or raised as ours."

He neared, hands reaching for my shoulders. I boiled under his touch as I nursed my painful cheek with my hand.

Closer, Rufus brought the shadow with him as he reeled his face inches from mine, his loose, blond side bangs, brushed across my unharmed cheek.

Through his teeth, he said, "You think I would let you go that easy? Nonsense. I will marry you tomorrow, destroy Meteor two days after that. And in due time..." I gasped when one of Rufus's hands gripped my short hair from the back of my skull, pushing my head up to his to ram our lips together for a quick exchange.

He pulled back enough to let my lips fall an inch away, and I winced, afraid to lose some hair inside his fist.

"I'll make sure you will carry my child as soon as you remove the first one. I've let your friends go, in exchange for you. You're mine." He said it all with so much pent-up force, I was afraid he would leave me a bald spot with the way he yanked to each word, as though he was still holding back an eruption of turmoil.

I closed my eyes to avoid being stabbed by Rufus's diamond sword, instead, feeling his hard lips again, his hands pushing me into him as though he wanted to fit all of me into his mouth and swallow. I've never met a man with such terrible possessiveness, a spoiled brat under a suit. Rufus thinks he could just take his life like a checklist...

Get married for higher approval ratings? Check.

Blow up Meteor? Check.

Impregnate my chained up new wife? Check.

I planted my hands against Rufus's bare chest, ready to push him away. But he was already withdrawing, breathing hard through his nostrils where he peered down at me with a cold gaze, pulling shadow over my winced face as he yanked my hair again.

"I should just have my way with you now, as your punishment for hiding such an important detail from me," he whispered.

At last, his hands released, and I collapsed on the bed like a wilted flower, relieved to watch him step away.

"But I'm turned off by such Chocobo shit. What rubbish," Rufus scoffed, turning away while fixing his shirt and tie.

My lips and cheek ached as I touched them both with my fingers carefully, propping myself up on the bed. Quickly, I retreat from it, as though staying on its silk covers would only bring me one step closer to Rufus changing his mind. I quickly skittered across the floor, sick to my stomach, but not enough to expel, only to get as far away from Rufus as I possibly could. Which left me only to the windows at the far side of the room, my hands to them as though I could press myself through the glass and fall into the dark abyss. Meteor reflected as a two, red, full moons, one in the sky and one in the sea, casting twice as much blood to the night. I pretended that I could see Sephiroth's plan hurling closer until it was sudden, fallen in a blink without pain nor gasp.

But instead, I only saw my reflection, a ghost of me blinking back tears as a dark red ocean and sky nested behind her translucent state.

What I saw was a failure.

In possibly another two weeks, maybe more, maybe less, Meteor will fall. I almost wanted to get it over with, sick of dreading its becoming so that I may rest for eternity. Either as energy particles absorbed into Sephiroth's new God-like body, or as a spirit trapped in a network of the Lifestream. I felt so insignificant. Not an Ancient. Not anything. I've stopped hearing the voices as soon as Isaac died, unsure if it was because I was too far withdrawn to hear them, or if the Planet neglected me.

My hands dragged, hearing the glass squeak lightly as my eyes shifted, and spotted Rufus's reflection far behind mine, staring at my back with displeasure.

"I'll be off for the rest of the evening. I can't..." he shook his head, and turned away, taking his double-breasted navy tench coat from a wall hook.

"I will see you tomorrow when you walk down the aisle," Rufus finished, not even taking the time to slip his arms through his coat. He just slung it over his sharp shoulder, and pressed on a small wall panel to slide the main door open. I turned around, watching him leave with the door sliding back to close, and then it clicked, locked from the outside.

Again, I was caged inside Rufus's apartment. Where he planned to sleep, I didn't care, just glad to be alone. It was more a gift than he thought it out to be, even if he was disgusted with my confession.

My legs felt weak, urging me to collapse on a chair at the table, our plates still left there, food picked and wasted. Half a bottle of the Cabernet still sat between flickering candles, and I thirst to finish it, but knew better. I licked my lips, remembering how red wines tasted, and sighed while my eyes fell to my little belly, hands cradling it.

That should be enough to wake me up, to pull away from the shadows, but it just wasn't. I knew I would make a terrible mother, and I proved it just shy of two months into growing my child. Again, a failure.

Suddenly, my elbows smacked on the table, rattling the utensils across plates, and I wept into my hands.

Aerith... I pictured her beautiful smile, her soft hands taking mine, how she encouraged me to use my wings, take flight, smile and laugh. Sephiroth took her away forever. It was still so unsettling, I could scarcely accept it.

Isaac... So many faces on Isaac, a man with many complexities, someone born privileged like Rufus, though with a purpose for curing sick children, the ones that should never be touched by disease. He was stuck on the idea of love, expecting everything to go his way, even if I tried to resist. Even when we were enemies, I still felt something of security, knowing that Isaac was simply alive.

Though, that preservation slipped away with him when he fell into the sea.

Cloud... I couldn't even begin how I thought of him, troubled by his choices, and yet, deeply in love. He's scarred me in more ways than one, both pleasurably and achingly. A man with a troubled past, possibly nothing more than a research experiment, Sephiroth's shadow with white wings. But he was real to me. Cloud felt pain, he smiled, he got angry, he even laughed.

I shouldn't torture myself when memories of Costa De Sol surfaced, but I couldn't resist. Me, Cloud and Aerith laughing as we tumbled into the crystal, blue sea together. Water splashing as Aerith forced us into another group hug. Her laughter reaching the blue sky. Cloud's smile, so pure, lit up by the sun. Our faces drenched, hair tossed and the salty sea sitting on our tongues.

I wish I could've snapped shot that moment in a photograph. I would've clung to it, wrinkling it as I pressed it close to my heart, my fingers bending it as it crinkled.

My hands slipped away, leaving my eyes to wander the table to suddenly latch onto Rufus's steak knife. The idea faded as quickly as it came, and I turned my head away from it before it was too tempting. Just a little longer.

We were all going to die anyway.

...

Today was the day.

My dim eyes looked at the polished woman in front of the tall mirror.

A dress in pure white, with a train so long, it twisted around its long, layered lace skirt twice. Followed by two long curtains of lace falling down my back like wings melting into my dress, and long sleeves hugging my arms. The heart-shaped neckline dipped towards my sternum, my pregnancy breasts half exposed, but I was grateful for the delicate lace to stretch floral patterns across my chest like careful spiderweb work.

My poor, short hair was barely enough to gather into a knot. My servant fussed over it as she twisted it up into her thick hands.

"I liked your long hair. It was beautiful, easy to style," she grumbled as she tried pinning lose strands into my head. A white ribbon unrolled from her hand, perking me awake for just a breath.

"Could you find a soft, pink ribbon?" I suggested.

My servant, I couldn't even recall her name, she fluttered her eyes to my reflection, bewildered that I spoke at all. Have I been that quiet?

"Pink?" She dragged, unsure as to why I would pick such a color.

But I wanted to feel like I had a piece of Aerith with me, a pink ribbon just the right touch. If I was going through with this, I needed reassurance, a trinket to remind me of someone who would've held my hand, walking me down the aisle.

It took a few minutes, but luckily, my servant found a soft pink ribbon. She fixed it into my little stub of collected hair, and then stepped off her stool to glide back and have a look.

I pretended to smile, but it didn't reach my eyes. I've always pictured my wedding day a bit more...exciting.

There was nothing to feel. Just another passing thing, barely taking notice to the world around me. Lipstick to make my lips more red. Long, diamond earrings that clanked like tiny bells whenever I moved my head.

The only thing that seemed to poke at my sleeping self, was seeing how a ribbon, like Aerith's, hung behind my head. Its twin tails tickled the back of my neck as though she was there, taking her fingers to my skin to calm me. But then my imagination grew more twisted, and her hand was covered in blood, leaving traces of it down my back and smudging it onto my dress. I began to hyperventilate, watching how my face grew pale even when there was blush on my cheeks.

"Oh, you poor thing. Nervous on your wedding day is very natural," my older servant mentioned. Behind my shoulder, I spotted someone coming through the sliding door quietly, until I recognized it to be Reeve.

"Please give me and the bride a few minutes. I can calm her down," Reeve reassured, gently sweeping my servant out of the private room to one of the other apartments. She hurried away, leaving the two of us alone in the room filled with bouquets, cards, make up, brushes and spare clothes, scattered over shelves or on a white bed.

I watched Reeve through the mirror, finding him looking presentable in a luxury black suit with matching petticoat. He had a dark red tie clipped to his white shirt, and a silver chain looped from his collar to his coat's high chest pocket. With his beard trimmed nicely, and hair combed back in place, Reeve almost appeared like a different person, though I still recognized those dark bags under his eyes, almost glad to see them. His presence calmed me down enough to breathe easier, and I took a deep breath, a hand to my belly as though to calm the nervous child with me.

"You look dashing," I muttered, trying to make light of a dreary day.

Reeve ducked his head as he heaved a chuckle, hands tucked into his pant pockets.

"I could say the same about you, but..." he stopped, lifting his eyes back to look at me in my dress, and he sighed tiredly, already having enough of pretending.

He peeled his gaze away, unsatisfied with the dress, and remained captivated by the window beside the mirror. His fine shoes, tapped loudly across marble when he neared the glass, and looked to Meteor hovering West of Junon.

"Today is supposed to make the public happy for a while," Reeve muttered, unmoved by the idea.

"A fantasy," I breathed, and through the mirror, I watched how he slumped in his suit until he looked like an overworked employee forced into a too fine of outfit for his salary.

"I wish..." Reeve stopped short, looking back at my reflection. "I wish there was another way. I wish I could stop this. For Cloud, for Planet's sake," he whispered. He made a fist in his pocket.

I looked over my shoulder at him, and my earrings jingled.

"For Aerith, too," I reminded.

Reeve forced a smile at me.

"And for Aerith." He licked his lips and took a deep breath to help him gather enough courage to ask me a hard question.

"It must be hard for you, without her," he tried, leaving the rest left unsaid, or for me to fill. I let the air thicken with dismay, dropping my eyes to the bundle of heavy skirt and train around me.

"It's torture," I barely muttered, just under a whisper.

Reeve's eyes moistened, and he swallowed as he bravely neared. As gently as he could, he settled a warm hand on my shoulder, and tried to smile at me in the mirror.

"Let's hope the rocket project works," he sighed.

I avoided his hopeful gaze, my eyes too heavy as they fell to the floor.

"Of course," I muttered.

I could feel Reeve about to leave, his hand slipping away and falling back to his pocket. As he turned around, I jolted my head to look back at him, diamonds jingling.

"Reeve?"

Halfway to the door, he stopped, and waited.

I bit my lower lip.

"Could you tell me my fortune? Please? As a wedding gift."

I've asked so much of Reeve when he took me to see Isaac. He was lucky to keep his job, but only because he sought Rufus as soon as he woke up from Scarlet's sleeping spell. Though, he also felt guilty, blaming himself for what happened to Isaac.

Reeve sighed, too polite to even consider suggesting ahead of time to remind me that he had nothing left for me, his predictions pointless. But instead, he slightly turned, and watched me quietly, though his eyes held a painful look.

When our eyes met, he forced a fragment of a smile.

"I'm not good at that," he lamely shared, a kind way of telling me "no."

But I lifted my lips to make enough of a smile, and asked again.

"Either way, it's what I want," I urged.

Reeve took in a deep breath through his nose, his chest rising. His silver tie clip, glimmered under a small chandelier above us.

His eyes drifted to the floor, mulling his thoughts for a minute. During that time, a small smile crept up on his pale face, a true one. Reeve chuckled lightly to himself, and looked up at me, trying so hard to keep that smile in place as he said, "Meteor has been destroyed. We're united with our friends, celebrating saving the world. Everyone is there, even Cloud, and he's smiling. He's smiling more than I ever thought possible. And he's holding you like he will never let go again."

Reeve's brown eyes glistened, and he shuddered an inhale, his gaze lifting to the chandelier.

"Aerith is watching us, smiling through the breeze and in the gentle rain. Isaac is smiling behind a sun, having the sky to itself again, and," he choked, bitting into his lower lip, and a tear escaped, dropping his gaze to nothing as he became absorbed in the imagery.

"And you're holding a beautiful baby girl in your arms, a tiny thing with eyes like Cloud's, and a smile like yours. No rings. No wedding, like it's not needed to prove your love-I'm sorry," he sniffed and rubbed a long thumb across his cheek to wipe at the sudden tears.

"Excuse me," Reeve gasped, and he left as quickly as possible to finish his tears in private. But he didn't notice that I was silently crying with him. Tears were already smearing my cream blush when I watched him leave, and I sniffed, trying to inhale the rest of them to stay as I dabbed my fingers to hide the evidence.

I used the back of my hand to rub, taking back make up that was supposed to hide my red cheek from Rufus's mighty hand last night. It glowed easily when I glanced back at the mirror.

"Gods, damn it all," I whispered to my reflection.

The door opened, Reeve poking his head again, and muttered, "They're ready for you."

I sniffed, wiping more tears that kept falling, and they wouldn't stop.

"I can't..." I gasped, unable to stop them as they dripped off my chin and land on my skirt.

"I have a problem," I whimpered.

Reeve stepped inside the room and looked at me.

"What is it?" His eyes were red, a man quick to freeze his tears.

I twirled around to show him how drenched my face has become, sniffling and coughing as my earrings rang.

"I can't seem to stop crying."

...

As soon as I stepped off the elevator, I kept my head bowed, finding the long, red carpet under my white heels. It was to guide me, to the rest of my life. Dreadfully, I gaped at it, unable to move as the music played.

A sting orchestra moved their instruments with ease, bows across strings of violins with careful precision, slow and depressingly beautiful. I didn't recognize the song, but knew it was my cue to start walking.

A line of Shinra guards, stood stiffly, the red carpet laying in between them as I watched all their hidden faces behind electronic helmets.

"I'll take you halfway," whispered Reeve, taking my arm gently.

I was glad he was there, walking with me towards the main aisle. My hands tightened around the long stems of a large bouquet of foreign red flowers, their petals falling away like drops off blood at my skirt. Soon, I lifted my head, eying the whole airfield as it transformed from an airport, to an outdoor wedding. Yards away, there were rows of white chairs draped with white ribbons and small white bouquets. More Shinra guards lined outside the privileged audience, like statues in navy uniforms, their mouths straight, arms solid at their sides. Rows of red rope held up by gold, kept the aisles clear from the red runway, making the ceremony almost appear like a red-carpet affair.

I swallowed, turning my head to look over at my right shoulder, a sun slowly setting over the red and pink sea. Meteor was there with it. Rufus wanted an outdoor wedding, as though he could silently mock Meteor just days before he planned to annihilate it with his company's technology.

Displeased with the sky, I looked away, unable to keep neither of the horrid sights from my vision as I neared the red aisle. There was nothing pleasant to look at. A wretched wedding to my left, and Meteor to my right. Looking ahead only left my vision up to both sites, and I sighed, ducking my head again.

Reeve's hand tightened around my arm, not saying anything. What could he say? Good luck? You'll do fine? There was nothing to make this moment worth trying, not a word nor paragraph or even a lifetime of words.

As soon as my heel hit the other red carpet, his hand slipped away, and he bowed, not really looking at me. One glance up at Meteor over my shoulder, Reeve stepped back and stayed, as though to keep me from running away. It was either back to him or up towards Rufus.

I trembled as I turned, and slowly gazed across the long aisle, like a tall rope I had to climb. At the top, stood Rufus.

Except for his black undershirt and red tie, he was in all white. His formal coat held a fluff of an angel wing to his right shoulder, and a silver emblem of Shinra's symbol, chained and draped over his other shoulder. White silk pants, matching petticoat, and his hair the same as it's always been, Rufus held himself like a white prince, granted an angel wing as though he deserved it. When he saw me stand there at the very end of the aisle, his glossy, pale lips quirked in a crooked smile.

The audience rose from their seats, and turned around just to watch me, all in a rumbling fashion like a stampede of bulls for five seconds, and then, when they stilled, it was just the music playing.

I swallowed, and took a shaky foot forward.

A breeze tickled the back of my neck, brushing away the sweat there as I tensed, breathing very little as I unintentionally locked eyes with Rufus's. His stare sparkled, a look of triumph as though he won. Heidegger stood properly behind him, in a matching suit like Reeve's, though his thick beard hid most of his red tie. The bearded man cleared his throat, his scarred eye squinting up at Meteor. They all were.

I knew it as they all looked at me, Meteor was in the background, like a floating shoulder demon following me down the aisle.

But Rufus looked at it with pleasure, just another thing to tackle down. I looked over my left shoulder, finding nothing left of Junon's cannon except its outer ring against the base. The whole cannon was taken away, to be used into another project, leaving the city defenseless, but it was a risk Rufus was willing to take.

My hands began to sweat, more red petals falling, mixing in with the same color carpet. My chest stiffened. My belly ached and kicked.

One more step only brought me closer to betraying Cloud.

Was he watching me now, disappointed in where my life has taken me? I pictured his face in shadow, Mako eyes flared and frowning deeply as he watched from the heavens, Aerith and Isaac beside him.

No voices told me to turn away. No vibrations of the Planet to give me advice nor demands. No hands pulling me back.
This is it.

Again, I sighed into the flowers, fluttering my eyes to the carpet, halfway there. The winds carried more petals, growing stronger until they were lifted into the cloudless sky. Strands of my hair began to escape, the ribbon brushing pass my neck towards Rufus. A temporary stone altar waited with him, standing there, littered with red flowers.

I felt like a sacrifice. Put me on that altar, cut me open, and see what I bleed.

My hands lifted the bouquet closer to my lips, hiding them as they shook, and I sniffed, trying my hardest to hold back tears.

Resting behind the shadows, I rested while watching my body walk, one step at a time.

I'm alone.

I whimpered those two words in my head, sinking until I laid flat on nothing, closing my eyes and wishing to take my body with my spirit.

Just a little longer. If Rufus fails, then we all shall accept our fates.

The cold truth was inviting, an end to a dreadful tale. An actual end.

Ever closer, I snuck a hidden smile to myself, all ready for that ending. Rufus will have a few pages of his fairy tale, and then the story finishes shortly after.

Another footstep.

And then-

I gasped, suddenly feeling something disturbing. A cold sweat tickled down my neck. No voices, but I could feel the air shift, the winds strengthening. I stopped, and my dim eyes hardened before I looked over my shoulder, feeling something dark heading this way. Whatever it was, it was coming from over the sea, something sharp, massive, and deadly.

Whispers of my pause traveled through the group, words of "cold feet" and "scared" littered the air. But Rufus, knowing to take my alarming state seriously, tensed. Heidegger's dark eyes carefully analyzed the sky, pondering if he should order the artillery to aim, but at what? There was nothing, right?

A strange dread flooded me, its voice muffled. Why couldn't I hear it?

The Planet left you behind. You can't hear anything anymore, remember?

My hidden self told me these cold words, her form lying there in the dark, eyes as grey as stone when they looked up to nothing. Arms and legs sprawled, fallen like a soldier, my inner me was heavy and limp, hardly breathing, until her eyes unexpectedly shifted. Something caught her attention.

My eyes widened, spotting a dark dot in the sky. With tremendous speed, it grew. The winds picked up, tickling into my dress and stirring its lace.

From the audience, whispers grew into startled breaths and loud wonder, a wave of curiosity traveling across the airfield.

But Heidegger growled behind his large teeth and turned to Rufus.

"Sir, we've got an unwelcome guest," he hissed.

Rufus glared up at the growing dot, until lines of dark wings appeared. He lifted a blond eyebrow.

"I've forgotten about the flying one," he uttered. "It had to pick today, of all days."

"Your orders?"

"Hit it with everything we got. Without the cannon, we have to use all of our men. Use the tanks, the ships, all of it," Rufus ordered coldly, a hand out at his side as though he was ready to pull out his revolver. "I will not have Weapon ruin my wedding day."

I stayed in place, watching with large eyes as a creature emerged from the dot. Wings flapped, and then a metallic scream broke through the anxious air, causing everyone to scream.

"It's Weapon!" A woman screeched.

"Run!"

All five-hundred guests, and more, scrambled out of their chairs, falling over each other as they rushed towards the elevators. Red rope knocked over, ribbons torn, cameras neglected, flowers tossed and stepped on. Among the coursing river of people, I remained still, watching Weapon grow. When I thought it would stop, it only seemed to expand even further. At first, I thought it would be no bigger than a tank, but as it neared, it only grew until it was as large as a blimp.

And then it stopped in midair, its flapping wings creating a powerful wind storm. My hair tossed loosely, the pink ribbon gone. The bouquet slipped from my hands, rolling down the aisle like desert tumbleweed. The Weapon's face perched just over the airfield, like a giant peering inside a dollhouse.

It looked to be more machine than organic, with eyes lit up red, and skin of shiny black metal. It had a snout of a dragon, and teeth whirling inside its mouth like sharp gears, spinning as silver saws across metal gums.

When Weapon opened its mouth, I saw nothing but a void behind those moving teeth, and the massive thing screeched like metal rubbing against metal.

I covered my ears, bowing to the rush of heat and gust that escaped its long throat.

"All Shinra troops, assemble! Aim all gun ports at Weapon!" Heidegger screamed into his phone.

Shrina troops, hundreds of them from behind the scenes, rushed around the wave of panic, and took position with their rifles pressed against their shoulders, clicking into place.

But Weapon was enormous. Even bigger than Sapphire Weapon. There was no way bullets alone was enough to stop it.

It made the airship look like a toy.

Isaac's old words gave warning of its size, and he wasn't joking. This creature, built as a weapon, was as big as Shrina's building, a titan from Greek Mythology.

Its red eyes zoomed in on me, its head moving slowly, not attacking nor withdrawing either, just analyzing while its claws curled around the edge of the airfield, cracking it in its grip.

Again, its voice was nothing but a blur inside my head, and I shook to it, "I'm sorry, I don't understand you."

Why does it matter?

My inside voice muttered flatly, reminding me there was no point.

A cold hand grabbed me, fingers curled tight to crush mine as Rufus screamed, "Aqua, we need to go!" And he yanked me with him, retreating as far away as possible.

"Fire!" Heidegger screamed.

Bullets expelled from guns loudly, crackling across the air with rattling force. Distant explosions boomed from below, probably launched from ships. Weapon held itself in midair, taking each hit without notice. Every bullet that fired, grazed and bounced off its tough skin, its metal scales too thick to penetrate. Bullets flew back, scattered and hitting innocents, smashing vases and creating holes in the carpet.

As Rufus pulled me away from the chaos, people argued and complained over the limited space inside the only elevator. Not enough to fit more than thirty, many desperately tried to squeeze between the closing doors. Some dared to climb down the airfield, only to slip and fall. Others took to the stairs, scrambling to descend.

More bullets, yet not even a dent emerged from Weapon's body. Ammo had to be reloaded, the gun firing halted long enough to refill. Weapon used the time to have a turn.

The airfield then quaked, its flooring breaking apart. Holes of concrete broke away, fallen to the bottom, leaving gaps for anyone to accidentally stumble through and land to the small town below us. A few unfortunates slipped into the cracks, screaming as they fell to their deaths, landing on the covered beach or on top of a shack, bones shattered and organs splat.

I stepped away from a fissure, gasping when I watched chairs tumble, some of them disappearing under the airport.

And then a massive claw reached, and, like a wall of a large building, it smacked at dozens of Shinra men, pushing them over the edge. They screamed, falling like tumbled toy soldiers.

Rufus kept his hard hold on my hand, tugging me towards the garages. Many doors lifted, revealing hangars with Riot troopers piling out, holding their shields up. A small group of armored Magitroopers stomped outside, and fired from their gun arms. SOLDERS 2nd and 3rd class emerged, holding their weapons and casting Materia magic. They were more robust than the small fry, reminding me of Cloud as I watched from over my shoulder. Like Cloud's uniform, though in red and dark green, hard faces with clenched teeth behind helmets, the men held their swords with determination. It was a war zone. Magic casting, grenades exploding, rockets being launched.

But Weapon growled at the efforts, lack of amazement over the flimsy explosions that barely dented its armor.

The metal giant flapped its long wings, half its body covered in ice from a spell, and shook it off. Winds pushed them all back, when unexpectedly, Weapon grumbled to itself as it ascended, its nose pointed to the sky.

Was it leaving?

Higher it went, too high to reach with any weapon nor spell. A large dot high in the sky with wings.

Rufus stopped to watch with me, and he narrowed his eyes.

"What's it doing?" He asked through his teeth.

"Sir, reports from the other cities claim that it's about to ready its ultimate attack," Heidegger answered over his shoulder.

No SOLDIER nor weapon could reach the creature as it seemed to reach the edge of space.

"And what ultimate attack is that?" Rufus dared, barely eying at his commander.

Heidegger swallowed before he answered, "To blow up the whole city."

I squinted up at Weapon, when a glowing blue ball began to appear. It was growing, nested in between its hands like it was gathering energy.

"Great. Could it absolutely get any worst?" Rufus muttered, watching it all unfold.

The winds never ceased, until something else appeared from the sky. Like we all felt it, Rufus, Heidegger and I turned our heads, and the Highwind Airship flew in.

Something in my chest stirred. Inside, my withdrawn self lifted her head up, interested.

"Great," Rufus fumed, his eyes burning at the airship floating in, its propellers whirling its structure just a hundred feet above the airfield, but nowhere near Weapon hovering close to the sun.

I looked up, the sun and Weapon blocked by the Highwind. Rufus tried to pull me away, but I resisted, my dim eyes unable to retreat. They were so craned far up there, looking under the belly of the airship, until a tiny head with dark hair popped out over a railing.

"Aqua!"

It sounded like Tifa when I heard a scream from above.

My eyes grew just a little.

Tifa? What was she doing here? My inner self sat up in the darkness, watching closely. Tifa's dark hair lifted in the air wildly, covering her face as she leaned half her body over the railing, a hand around her mouth. From the heavens, she shrieked as loud as she could, like a megaphone to her lips, and her words rang through the air with two beautiful words.

"Cloud's alive!"

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