A/N: I should be ordering the rest of my textbooks rn but id rather do this, so I am :)

"Listen, man, whenever he goes to a new city and gets a new job, David Banner always uses his real first name and a fake last name that starts with a 'B'. What's gonna happen when he runs out of new 'B' letter last names to use?" Kelso earnestly questions while the guys of the gang are all gathered in the basement watching The Incredible Hulk . "I need answers!"

They smoked some pot earlier, but unfortunately, the effects have mostly worn off by now. These are just the normal, sober Kelso worries they have to put up with daily.

"I think the more important question is why he keeps choosing a fake name that's so similar to his real name if he's really trying to adopt a new identity," Eric points out. "Not to mention the fact that he's a famous scientist-- who's been in the news because of his alleged death-- and yet he does nothing to alter his appearance."

Hyde dully stares at his friends. Sometimes he gets tired of having pointless discussions like this. Nevertheless, he's glad Eric brought up a bigger plothole than Kelso's initial concern. He's rather proud, actually. Eric's pretty smart-- when he's not being stupid. However, if Hyde were currently in the mood to join in the discussion he'd shut them all down by enlightening them with the fact that Banner shouldn't need to change his name for each city he travels to at all. He just needs to pick one alias to stick to, unless it gets compromised, of course. All while staying under the radar, naturally.

But anyway, it's lucky for them he's not in the mood to talk--or is in less of a mood to talk than usual, that is.

It's been about a week since the mall shoplifting incident and Hyde hasn't told anyone about what happened, which is weird since he rarely passes up any opportunities to brag about his illegal exploits to his friends.

He tells himself it's because goody-two-shoes Eric would throw a hissy fit, Donna would give him one of her self-righteous scoldings, and Fez might tell Mrs. Forman. Kelso would normally laugh and give him a high five, but in this case, he'd make a scene about who it was Hyde had been with when he committed the act--Jackie. So he decides telling them isn't worth all the drama.

Yeah, that's what he tells himself.

The truth? He's rather enjoying having a dirty little secret-- a dirty little secret with Jackie Burkhart. It's something special they share now, some sort of connection between them, and it's something he doesn't want to be ruined by telling other people about it. A part of him feels bad for keeping something from the group of friends, but the other part feels, well, good. It adds to the juicy wrongness of it all.

He hasn't seen her since the incident, but he can't stop thinking about it; the adrenaline rush, the overall badness of it all, everything. His fingers itch, eager to grab something that doesn't belong to him. He misses the feeling of his heart pounding in his chest from anxiety and excitement as he wonders if he'll get away with the crime or the feeling of breathing that sweet sigh of relief as he makes it to safety. He wants to feel that again.

More than that though, he can't stop thinking about her. Her : Jackie Burkhart, thief and lock picker extraordinaire. Lawbreaker. Coping with having shitty parents by doing something naughty, just like him. The smile on her face as they ran through the mall and away from the security guard, the sparkle in her eye as they drove away to freedom. All of it. He wants to feel how he felt with her that night again.

But she hasn't come by since and he's starting to wonder if she wants to forget it ever happened. Of course, he hasn't gone over to see her either, so he can't complain too much. Which he supposes is fine, it's probably better this way. It was a one-time thing, that's all. The situation had been an extraordinary one that required extreme measures. It's not like they would intentionally go out and repeat the experience...right?

He wants to, there's no doubt about that. But Jackie probably doesn't, and even if she did it doesn't mean they should. It's no secret he likes to break the law and that his future is rather dim, but that's not the case with Jackie. She has a good reputation; her family is rich and well known, she gets good grades, and she has ambitions. She has a real future ahead of her, she can't get wrapped up in less than honorable extracurricular activities that may harm that future.

Unless of course, she never gets caught for those less than honorable extracurricular activities.

He's so lost in thoughts of Jackie and shoplifting that he doesn't hear when Eric addresses him directly.

"Hello? Hyde, you there?" his friend asks, waving a hand in front of his face.

"Hm?" He shakes himself back to reality and pushes Eric's hand away, annoyed. "What is it?"

"I just asked what you think, you know, about the David Banner alias situation."

"Oh. Yeah, the whole concept is kinda dumb, I guess. Almost a plothole on the writer's part, to be honest."

Eric doesn't respond to his answer, he only looks at Hyde thoughtfully. "Hey, man, is everything okay? You've been more quiet than usual."

Has he? He hasn't noticed. Darn it, is Jackie really having this much of an effect on him?

"I'm fine."

"You sure, buddy?" Kelso asks. 'Cause it sure seems like there's been a stick up your butt lately."

Fez cringes. "Ai that cannot be comfortable for you."

"I said I'm fine, so I'm fine," he insists. "It's all cool."

Kelso shrugs. "If you say so, man." His eyes suddenly light up. "Hey, speaking of cool, I'm gonna grab a popsicle. Anyone else?"

"Yes, me!" Fez jumps up, matching his energy, and they both make their way over to the deep freeze.

Eric frowns and takes the opportunity to lean close to Hyde, a shadow of concern still fallen across his face. "You know if there's anything going on, like with Bud or something, you can tell me, right? Or my parents."

Hyde blinks at him in surprise at the kind, genuine reminder. Things with Bud are only continuing to get worse, but he still hasn't told anyone. He can't. While he knows he can trust Eric he just...doesn't like being vulnerable; talking about feelings and all that crap. The last thing he needs right now is pity. Besides, this is his battle to face. He thought he could give Bud another chance and now he has to live with that choice.

"Yeah, I know," he says, feeling a twinge of guilt for keeping the truth to himself. It's times like this he's glad he wears shades, so people can't see through his lies. Still, he focuses his attention on the TV and avoids looking at Eric-- just in case.

Kelso and Fez have only just sat down with their popsicles when the basement door opens and Jackie walks in, surprising them all.

"Hey, Jackie," Kelso greets her coolly. "I figured you'd stop by soon."

Jackie stares at him evenly. "Calm down, Michael. I'm not here for you."

"Well, Donna's not here," Eric informs her. "She went out to eat with her parents."

Jackie turns to him with a much more friendly attitude than she'd shown Kelso. "That's alright, Eric. I'm not here for her either. I actually came to talk to Steven."

"What?!" Kelso yells. "Hyde?!"

Everyone's eyes are suddenly on Hyde, questions and curiosity shining in them all.

He gulps.

"Yes," Jackie replies to Kelso. "So I need you all to excuse me while I talk to him outside."

The three pairs of wide eyes don't leave Hyde as they wait to see what he's going to do. He plays it safe and doesn't meet their gaze, ignoring his friends overdramatic stares as he looks at Jackie. "Fine. You've got five minutes, that's it."

She grins and relief flashes across her face briefly, as if she wasn't quite sure he would be willing to talk to her at all. "Great!" She walks over to the basement door before turning back around to speak to the rest of the guys. "Oh, and if I catch any of you eavesdropping I will make you suffer."

Hyde tries not to smile smugly as he gets up from his chair and follows her outside. They don't bother going far, just standing near the steps.

Jackie smiles up at him and jumps right into it. "I can't stop thinking about what we did last week, Steven."

The corners of Hyde's mouth turn up, glad to know the feeling is mutual after all. "Yeah, me neither."

"I mean, it just gave me such a rush, you know?" she explains with a glimmer in her eye. "We were so badass. It was like something right out of a movie!"

He nods. "Yeah, it was pretty cool, huh?"

"Sooo," Jackie pointedly trails off as if Hyde is supposed to know exactly what she's thinking.

"Soo?"

"So we should do it again."

"Do what again?"

"Steal! Duh!"

Surprising himself, Hyde's smile falters a bit. "Jackie, I don't know if that's a good idea," he chides as if he hasn't been thinking of doing that exact same thing every day for the past week. He wants to do this again with her, but he can't help being slightly hesitant. If they don't stop now, if they make it a habit and not just a one-time thing, they may never stop. How far are they willing to go?

He's bound to end up in prison sooner or later, sure, but Jackie? She actually has a future. She's smart and has aspirations. He'd never tell a soul, but he admires her and her ambition. He would hate for her to throw it all away just for a little fun.

"Why not?" she asks. "You enjoyed it, I enjoyed it, so why shouldn't we?"

"Because Jackie, you're-"

"Because I'm what?"

Not like me.

"You're a good kid. I don't want you going down a slippery path into a life of crime."

She crosses her arms. "Oh, so good kids can't do something bad now and then? The only kids allowed to break the law are the ones from the wrong side of the track? Like you?"

"That's not what I'm saying."

"Yes, it is. You don't think I have what it takes. But I do. Have you forgotten who it was that picked our locks and got us out of being arrested?"

"No," he grumbles. "But-"

"But nothing. I've had a taste of something that made me feel more alive than anything else since I broke up with Michael, and I want more. I've shoplifted multiple times before and I'm gonna do it again whether you're with me or not, so you might as well join in." She then softens her attitude. "Besides, it's just a little shoplifting. That's not so bad, right?"

It sounds tempting. Very tempting. But he still feels a bit guilty. Then again, she says she's going to do it anyway. And she's probably right; he does seem to be overreacting. He's never shied away from breaking the law before, so why should he be so concerned about something like shoplifting? "Okay, I'm in. Just to make sure you don't get into trouble."

She smirks. "Right. Keep telling yourself that."

He glares at her through his sunglasses, but she's unfazed.

"Come by my house this evening," she instructs, "say around 8 o'clock. See you then!!" And with that, she cheerily runs up the steps and out of sight.

Hyde sighs, watching after her. What's happening to him? And what's happening between them? They're scheduling hangouts now?

No, no. It's not hanging out, it's for planned illegal activity. Yeah. Totally different thing.

Still, his stomach flips at the thought of spending more alone time with her, regardless of what it's for.

He walks back into the basement, bracing himself for the ambush of questions.

"What did Jackie talk to you about?" Kelso eagerly asks the second he steps back into the room.

"Yeah, since when does Jackie want to talk to you privately?" Eric adds. "Except for around Veteran's Day when she was randomly obsessed with you."

Kelso's already wide eyes widen even more. "Don't tell me she likes you again. I thought that phase was over. It is over, right?"

"Yes, relax," he answers. A tiny voice in the back of his mind reminds him that he almost wishes that phase hadn't ended on Veteran's Day, that she hadn't told him she 'didn't feel anything' during their kiss.

"Okay, then what was it about?" Kelso presses, confused.

Eric and Fez watch curiously, probably wanting an answer almost just as much.

"Nothing, she just had to ask me a question about some stupid school project," he says and is immediately washed over with the guilty realization that now is he not only keeping things from his friends, he's also straight-up lying to them.

He shoves those feelings down deep. Since when does he have a conscience? Hell, he's allowed to have a few secrets from them. Even if it's about something illegal and even if it's about Jackie.

Everyone eyes him, seeming to know that's not the whole story, but knowing from experience that prying will only result in irritating him

"What?" he snaps.

Okay, so maybe he's already irritated.

"Nothing,'' Eric says quickly, but he holds Hyde's gaze long enough to let him know he's suspicious.

Hyde tears his eyes away and focuses on the TV, greeted with the sight of the Hulk smashing through a brick wall, a welcome distraction. Maybe it'll make the guys forget about Jackie's visit.

"Well," Kelso says casually, "it doesn't matter what it was about anyway, Jackie and I are through and she still doesn't want me back. I thought she would've caved by now."

"Yeah, who wouldn't want to go back to their ex who cheated on them with multiple women?' Eric remarks dryly.

"I know, right?" Kelso agrees, not picking up on the sarcasm. "Like, that goes to show just how many women want me, and Jackie always wants what other women have. Or take what they have. Either way, I'm kinda surprised she hasn't taken me back."

There's a silence as everyone else cares more about watching the Hulk save a screaming woman than what Kelso's talking about at the moment--which is a topic they've heard a lot by now.

Unfazed, he continues. "Fellas, I think it's finally time I move on. For good."

"You've been saying that for weeks," Hyde scoffs, not bothering to move his gaze from the screen.

"Oh, I'm serious this time," he insists.

"I'm with you, Kelso. I think it's time I do the same," Fez speaks up, causing everyone to look at him questioningly. "I spent too long being jealous of Kelso being with Jackie and trying to win her over. Then there was Carolyn, which as you know, ended badly. But I am ready to move on now and find someone new to fall in love with. Someone who will love me back-- just not in a psycho, threaten-me-so-I'm-too-terrified-to-break-up-with-her way." He shutters at the unpleasant memory.

Hyde nods supportively. "You do that, man. I hope you find someone great."

"Thank you," Fez says appreciatively. "I am ready to move on and find someone new to be crazy about, just like Kelso is."

Kelso's eyes widen and he snaps his fingers. "I got it! Fez, me and you should help each other find girlfriends-- the perfect girlfriends! I mean, think about it; we're best buds, we know each other pretty well. Who else would know how to find the perfect girlfriends for us other than each other?"

Fez looks thoughtful, considering it. "That is true. Do you really think you can find a better girlfriend for me than I could?"

"Oh, yeah," he assures. "I have more experience with women than anyone else here, I know every kind there is. And I know you, so I'm sure I can find the perfect match. Besides, I think we're pretty suave on our own, so by helping each other our chances can only be better."

"Alright! I am in!" Fez smiles excitedly.

Hyde rolls his eyes. "Yeah, there's no way this will end badly."

"Exactly!" Kelso says in oblivion. "See? Even Hyde thinks it's a good idea."

"Oh, boy," Eric groans, afraid of how this idea will turn out.

At 7:53 that night, Hyde is sitting in his El Camino, parked right outside the Burkhart's house. He considers going up and knocking on the door but decides against it, figuring there's a good chance one of Jackie's parents will answer. He doesn't know them very well, but he knows enough. He knows they care far more about themselves and money than they do their own daughter. Assholes.

For a moment, Hyde considers straight up leaving. This has to be a bad idea, right? Getting more involved with Jackie, more involved with stealing, it's bound to end badly.

And yet, he can't bring himself to start the car and pull away from the Burkhart house. The memory of that feeling from last week: the sound of blood rushing in his ears, the spike of adrenaline coursing through his system, Jackie's small hand in his…

He wants to feel that again, just once. Yeah, just this one last time and then he'll be good. They just need to get it out of their system and they can move on and forget it ever happened. They can go back to whatever kind of weird 'frienemies' relationship they had. She'll go back to being the perfect, bossy rich girl of the group who will inevitably go back to dating Kelso. He'll go back to being the burnout lawbreaker of the group who pretends he doesn't care she's dating Kelso.

The front door of the Burkhart's house opens and interrupts his train of thought as Jackie emerges, cheerily skipping down the steps.

Hyde chuckles to himself as she makes her way over to his car. She's dressed in a skirt and a floral shirt, wearing a bright smile to match, not exactly criminal attire.

Opening the passenger door, Jackie slides inside and places the jacket she's carrying on her lap after she buckles her seat belt. "I wasn't sure you'd come!"

"Yeah, me neither," he admits.

"Well, I'm glad you did. Why didn't you come up to the house, though? My parents aren't home."

"They're not? Huh, I just saw the car in the driveway and assumed-"

"Oh, that's just our housekeeper. She's leaving in a few minutes anyway. My parents are still out working. Or something."

"This late in the evening?"

She avoids his gaze, looking almost uncomfortable. "Yeah, they work late sometimes." Then she looks up excitedly, any trace of discomfort is gone just like that. "So! Where should we go?"

"You mean you don't know?" he asks, both annoyed and confused. Why would she come down to the basement all excited to ask him to join her if she didn't even have any plans?

"Nope," she shrugs nonchalantly. "I thought we could decide together."

He has to stop himself from rolling his eyes and groaning. Fine, it's whatever. He'll just go with it. "Well, we can't go back to the mall. Not for a little while yet, anyway."

"Yeah, that's true...oh! Why don't we go to Price Mart?"

"Price Mart? Really?" It seems so...boring. Mediocre. Especially after stealing from a high-end store like Macy's.

"Yeah! It has practically everything."

"For relatively low prices, yeah. What would we even steal from there?"

"I want some blush. I don't usually buy makeup from cheaper places like that, but they do have this one brand that honestly isn't bad."

"More makeup?" Hyde asks in disbelief. "Is that all you steal? How much of that stuff do you need?" She doesn't wear an excessive amount, that much is obvious. She's naturally beautiful, after all.

She shrugs again. "You can never have enough. It's what I mostly steal, sometimes some hair ties or jewelry, too. Or anything pretty that catches my eye, you know how it is."

Hyde rolls his eyes. "Unbelievable. Putting talent to waste."

She crosses her arms indignantly. "Well, I don't think it's a waste. What do you want to steal, huh?"

"Probably some cigarettes."

Jackie crinkles her nose in disgust. "Since when do you smoke? Other than pot, I mean."

"Just a habit I picked up from my mom. But I only do it when I'm really stressed," he admits before realizing what he's saying.

"What are you stressed about?" she asks, and Hyde swears there's genuine concern in her voice.

"Nothing. Never mind," he snaps, shutting her down before she can ask any more questions. "Now, let's do this job already." He starts the car and begins driving towards Price Mart.

"Okay, but you do realize they keep the cigarettes behind the counter at that special register, right?" Jackie points out as they drive. "We need to think about this."

"Right," Hyde agrees. He's silent as he thinks it over. "We'll just have to do what those guards thought we were doing last week."

"You mean stealing? Yeah, that's what we were doing."

"No--I mean yes." He sighs. "Look, those security guards thought we were a team. They said they assumed we were watching out for each other while we were both stealing; looking out for employees and creating distractions when necessary. So let's do just that."

A sly smile makes its way across Jackie's face. "You mean be a team."

"Well, I--" he clenches his jaw. "If that's what you wanna call it, then sure."

He keeps his eyes on the road, but he can feel Jackie's smug gaze on him as he drives.

Jackie does her task first, heading straight for the cosmetics aisle. Hyde stands in the aisle directly across from that one, pretending to look at random merchandise while he keeps a lookout for her. Knowing he has her back, Jackie is able to easily carry out her shoplifting, finding the blush she wants and shoving it into her purse. She walks back over to Hyde, covertly grabbing some pretty hair ties as she does so and slipping them into her pocket.

Now comes the trickier part, Hyde's mission. He lingers in the next aisle over from the register that sells cigarettes while he waits for Jackie to distract the cashier working the counter.

He strains to hear.

"Excuse me, sir," Jackie greets the employee as she walks up to the end of the counter farthest from the selves of cigarettes. She smiles sweetly as she slightly leans over.

The employee goes over to her, his back to the rest of the stand-- and the cigarettes. "How can I help you?"

"Hi there, uh," she glances down at his nametag, "Jim, I was just wondering how you get a job here."

"You can just fill out an application and turn it in when you're done. Here, I think I have some back here actually," he offers, starting to turn around.

Jackie looks over his shoulder and sees Hyde coming around the corner from the next aisle over and making his way to the counter. She reaches out and grabs the employee's hand. "NO!"

The man stops and stares at her in surprise.

She quickly lets go of his hand and smiles sweetly again. "I mean, you don't have to do that now. Because I'm not sure I want to work here yet," she explains. "I was hoping you could, you know, tell me what it's like working here, how you like it. All that stuff."

He relaxes. "Oh. Well, the pay isn't great, especially starting out. But then again, in this economy, it's like that everywhere."

Jackie forces out a laugh. "Tell me about it!" She looks past him and sees Hyde reach the counter right in front of the cigarette shelves. He takes one last look around to make sure there are no other employees in sight before he places his hands on the counter. He glances over and meets Jackie's eyes and nodding slightly, letting her know he's about to make his move.

She bites her lip, hoping he knows what he's doing. Whether he does or not, she's going to do her best to help him out. Playing with her hair and maintaining her bright, innocent smile, she tries to keep the employee's attention fixed on her. "SO," she says loudly, "what about the management? I've heard Red Forman can be a bit of a hardass. Tell me about that."

"So here's the thing," he begins to answer, taking the bait, "he's a great supervisor, he actually does his job-- unlike some of the other ones. The trick is staying on his good side…"

"Mmhm," Jackie nods along with him, not actually listening to anything he's saying. Her thoughts are all on Hyde as he uses his arms as leverage to swing himself over the counter. Jackie holds her breath, but he manages to land his feet on the other side almost silently.

Jim doesn't notice, continuing to talk to Jackie.

"-and if his son Eric is working the same shift as you, you can take it easy because Mr. Forman's full attention will be on him, just waiting to yell at him for something. It's actually pretty funny. Like this one time, Eric dropped a jar of mayonnaise and it broke and got all over the floor…"

Jackie laughs with him and continues to act thoroughly invested in his story, all while anxiously glancing over at Hyde every so often.

He looks through the shelves to find the brand he likes, his eyes scanning as quickly as they can. Finally, he takes two packs of the cigarettes he wants and stuffs them into his pocket. He then repeats the process of swinging himself over the counter, which turns out to be a much narrower success than the first time as the fabric of his pants accidentally slides across the smooth surface. They don't make enough noise for the employee to turn around, however.

Now safely back on the right side of the counter, Hyde looks over at Jackie triumphantly, silently fist-pumping the air and sending her a mischievous snicker.

Excitement and relief swell in her chest, but she manages to control herself and not give their theft away. She watches Hyde disappear down the far end of the next aisle again before she looks back at Jim, pretending to care about what he's talking about when in reality she couldn't care less.

Less than a minute later, Hyde comes up behind her, having walked down the next aisle over to the end closest to her. "Hey, they didn't have what I needed. We probably have to go to Lowe's or something. You ready to go?"

"Oh, yes," she answers, going along with the charade. "I was just thinking about working here, but on second thought, I can't work somewhere that makes me wear such an ugly smock." She gives the employee an innocent smile. "Sorry!"

He frowns in confusion, but Jackie doesn't wait around for any more of a reaction. Gently taking Hyde's arm, she walks with him towards the exit.

Hyperaware of the merchandise in both of their pockets, Jackie and Hyde outwardly act Zen despite their hearts racing and the breath they're holding. As they successfully walk through the doors of the store together, they're graced with the reward of sweet, sweet adrenaline. They swear they're high on it, not walking towards the car anymore but gliding.

They both have the same thought: they make a great team and they're good at this. Really good.

And they don't plan on stopping anytime soon.