The next day was the day Maura has confirmation that she was truly on the path to finally getting back to the woman she was when Jane fell in love with her.

The sun had yet to rise and only a select few residents were awake as Maura, clad in the new yoga clothes her father had brought yesterday wrapped in tissue paper from one of her mother's favourite boutiques, wandered into the small gym on the lower level of the facility. She smiled gently at the only other person before unfurling her mat and beginning her workout.

Though it had been longer than Maura cared to admit since her last yoga session—the practice abandoned as every bit of her strength had been directed towards keeping herself afloat—and she felt the tightness as each pose came and went. Not even the calm of her favourite pastime could stop the realisation from intruding into her mind that the illness she had fought so hard to keep pushed down had not only destroyed her mind but impacted her body as well.

Her once flexible joints now felt stiff as she encouraged them to open with the poses. Her once strong arm muscles felt weak as she fought to hold herself in cobra pose and her once favourite warrior pose saw her leg tremble slightly after only a few moments. With each transition she discovered another part of her that ached.

She wasn't sure if the ache of her body was soothing, as it meant she was now more aware of her physical self and not just the mental anguish she had endured, or if she felt uncertain and worried that she might not be able to cope with both physical and mental pain.

She glanced at her watch and, with the breakfast hour quickly coming to a close, Maura eased herself into savasana where she allowed herself to lay back on her mat. She had only just closed her eyes as a sob wracked her body.

The person who had been lifting weights on the other side of the gym quickly set down their weight and immediately crossed the gym to Maura.

"I'm fine, I'm fine," Maura quickly reassured as she wiped her eyes and looked up at the man who stood above her.

"That didn't sound fine. Should I get someone?"

"No, really," Maura smiled as she took a few deep breaths. "Yoga can often cause a rush of emotions such as this. I promise you, I'm okay," she continued as tears continued to fall from her eyes and land in her hairline.

"If you say so," the man said hesitantly.

"They're good tears. I promise, they're not bad tears."

After eating breakfast and taking a quick shower, Maura made her way down the long treatment hallway towards her therapist's office.

"Hi, Maura," the therapist smiled. At first Maura struggled to connect with the woman who has several years her junior, but after her outburst earlier in her treatment the therapist had proven herself to be a trusted source of reflection who knew just how to balance pushing the blonde into facing her demons and allowing her to move at even the most glacial of paces.

"Good morning, Lucy," Maura replied as she shut the office door behind her and sat across from the clinician. "I hope you made it in alright. I heard the radio saying the roads were quite dicey this morning."

"I went to university in the northern parts of Switzerland," the doctor replied with a shrug. "It takes more than a little snow to scare me."

"You sound like every Bostonian when winter rolls around," Maura laughed.

"I've heard they're a tough breed, those Bostonians," Lucy said with a raised eyebrow. "I also heard you were doing yoga this morning. It's the first time you've done it while with us, I think."

"It's the first time I've done yoga in…" Maura trailed off, brow furrowing slightly as she tried to remember the last time she had managed to practice. "Well, it's been a long time. I used to do it daily and then when my mind started getting darker, it fell to the wayside."

"Is that why you were crying?"

Maura's eyes widened at observation.

"It's impossible to keep secrets in a facility like this," Lucy explained when she saw the look on Maura's face. "The staff is performing checks multiple times an hour, other residents talk, and news travels fast."

"I suppose you're right," Maura admitted. "I still would have told you about my emotional response. I don't want you to think I was hoping to keep it a secret from you."

"I didn't think that at all. But back to my question, were you crying because it felt good to be getting back into old routines?"

Maura remained silent, the look on her face very clearly demonstrating that she was mulling over her word choice very carefully before speaking.

"What have we talked about?" Lucy asked. "You don't need to try and calculate your words with me. Just talk. It doesn't have to make perfect sense.

"I was laying in savasana at the end of my session and it suddenly hit me that my mind had been clear for the entire, I don't know, hour that I had been working out," Maura began. "Not empty, which it used to be when yoga was a regular part of my daily routine, but it felt clear. As if I was finally able to see things around me without the haze of sadness or tidal waves clouding my mind. That, combined with the natural endorphins and the highly emotional response yoga elicits from people, caused a physical release that resulted in tears."

"I see," the other woman said as she finished jotting down notes. "Can I ask a clarifying question?"

"Of course."

"You once said that the only times you remember feeling like you weren't drowning were when you were with Jane," Lucy noted. "I'm wondering if, on some level be that conscious or subconscious, you cried because you realized that time of your life might be coming to an end. And you don't want it to."

"No," Maura replied simply. "I'll always need Jane in some capacity. I need her to reach the top shelves in my cabinets or to remind me that I'm not on my own anymore. I need her to share her family and friends with me and I need her to make me laugh after an awful day at work. I'll never want to not need Jane."

"Those things you've listed are quite different than needing Jane to keep you from drowning."

"True. But…" Maura trailed off, running a hand through her hair as she tried to sort through what was in her mind.

"But what, Maura?" Lucy asked.

"Part of why I was crying was because of Jane," she admitted. "I cried because for the first time I was able to save myself. I didn't need her to toss me a lifesaver. All I've ever wanted was to be good enough and well enough to be with her. And now, finally, I feel like I am on my way there."

"I think you are, too."

Maura looked up and smiled brightly at her therapist.

"I heard last night you were laughing and dancing with another resident, and today you were finally able to see through your ocean of sadness and pull yourself into a life preserver without any help," Lucy commended. "I think it is entirely safe to say you are on the right track to recovery."

"I know external validation is secondary, but it feels so good to hear you say that."

"Now, we shouldn't get too ahead of ourselves. I don't think you're ready for discharge just yet."

"No, I agree fully," Maura stated. "I don't want to risk jeopardizing any forward progress by jumping right back into the community."

"Glad we agree," Lucy smiled. "It looks like you just reached the optimum titration of your medication last night, so we ideally would have you stay with us just a few more days just to make sure it all levels out. But if you keep this forward momentum up, I think we could have you out of here by Christmas."

"Wow," Maura smiled.

"It's okay if the thought of discharge doesn't have you jumping for joy," Lucy laughed. "We have a rigorous set of checks we go through to ensure you're safe for discharge and understand it's a big step."

"It almost feels as big a step as coming here in the first place," Maura admitted.

"And we won't let you make that step unless it's the best one for you," Lucy reassured. "And just because you're no longer an inpatient doesn't mean you're on your own. We have our day program you can attend, and even if you move back to Boston I am more than happy to conduct virtual appointments with you."

"Thank you."

"Of course," Lucy smiled. "Now, let's talk about your evening dance party from yesterday."