Almost a week had passed since Ben and Miranda had spoke. She didn't keep her promise to stay in touch and come around. And Ben was still too upset to even want to find out why she hadn't even though he thought about her and worried about her everyday.
Ben was thankful to be a doctor in this moment because he had been picking up extra shifts for the past few week. He didn't want to go home and be alone but even staying at the hospital in an on call room, he couldn't sleep but he tried anyway.
"Ben….BEN BABY COME HERE!" Janet called. Ben hurried into the room where his mom was to make sure she was okay. Chemotherapy was taking a way worse toll on her body than the actual cancer and since his dad died two years before from a massive heart attack he was her full time caregiver when her nurse aid wasn't there.
"I need to use the bathroom son but my legs feel too weak for me to move," Janet said with a crack in her voice. She hated the predicament that she was in and that her son had to do almost everything for her. He wasn't getting the chance to live his life because he was only working and racing home to take care of her.
"It's okay momma I got you," Ben said reassuring his sweet mother. Ben picked his mother up and carried her to the bathroom.
Janet insisted that Ben turned around while she used the bathroom but he just chuckled at her stubbornness and need for independence at the littlest thing because she was going to need his help when she finished.
Janet requested to go to the bathroom several more times. Ben sat at the end of her bed with a concerned look on his face worried that she maybe constipated.
"My stomach hurts so much but nothing is happening," Janet expressed.
Later that night Ben was awoken out of his sleep by the sound of his mother screaming. He ran to her room and when he rushed in she was laying there gripping her stomach. Ben quickly called 911 as he attended to his mother.
He got to the hospital a few minutes after the ambulance and when he entered the ER to find his mother a doctor informed him that she was rushed up to the OR for emergency surgery. She had developed an intestinal perforation that they need to quickly fix it.
Ben sat in the waiting room quietly but on the inside he was a nervous wreck. He had no one to turn to for support. His mom was the last bit of family he had since his dad died and his sister ran off and never looked back when their mom became sick several years back.
Ben looked up when he saw the surgeons coming towards him. He stood up waiting for the news they had to give. "Dr. Warren, I am Dr. Shelby your mom's surgeon. She pulled through the surgery but because of the perforation in her intestines that was leaking waste, it also went directly into her bloodstream causing sepsis. We have her on heavy antibiotics but her organs aren't responding, she is in her room now if you would like to see her," Dr. Shelby said before walking away.
Ben slowly walked into his mother's room and quickly sat down as he just stared at her on a ventilator and he felt like his world was crumbing. His mom had become his best friend and now she was laying there barely hanging onto life, he official felt alone in this world.
It had been a week and Janet wasn't getting better. All of her organs were failing and she had already signed a DNR years ago when she first got sick. Ben sat in her room and jumped when he heard the machines sound alerting that her heart had stopped. Ben instantly felt like a kid needing his mother but she couldn't help.
The nurses came in and turned the sound on the monitors down and offered Ben some tissues as he cried. "Mom….momma don't leave me please. I'll be all alone if you leave me so don't leave me please," Ben pleaded as he sobbed into the side of the bed and held his mom's hand.
Ben jumped up as he woke up out of his sleep covered in sweat. He dropped back down onto his pillow as he just stared at the ceiling of the on call room. He looked at his watch and it was almost time to give report and go home. He didn't pick up another shift this time and he quickly regretted it. After Ben finished report and gathered his things he headed home.
Ben walked into his condo and dropped his bag and keys on the table beside the door. He looked around and let out a deep sigh as he thought about Miranda and her deciding to leave. He understood her point of view but it didn't make him feel any better. He had finally gotten somewhat use to being alone and then came Miranda. She was special and he could tell he just didn't know why he had that feeling.
Ben walked to his bedroom and plopped down onto his bed and stared at his ceiling fan as it turned. He didn't understand why he was always being left alone. "I am a good man, willing to do anything for anybody, and I have a good personality. Why am I always being left alone and why do I have to feel so lonely?" Ben wondered to himself.
He just continued to lay there and watch his ceiling fan turn around and around.
"BEN….BEN!" Zora screamed from the bathroom. Ben hurried into the bathroom and grabbed ahold of her waist from behind to slow himself down.
"What is it baby," Ben said loudly.
"There's two lines…. there's two, THERE'S TWO, THERE'S TWO, THERE'S TWO!" Zora screamed as she jumped up and down and hugged Ben around his neck.
"WE'RE PREGNANT!" Ben shouted as he joined her in the excitement.
Seven months in Zora and Ben were finally having the baby they had been waiting for. Seven years together and four miscarriages. They were finally getting the baby they had been wanting and it was a little boy. The couple laid in bed as they kissed and Ben rubbed her belly.
"I want to name him Benjamin after me since we can't agree on any other names, "Ben declared.
"Okay, since we can't seem to agree on a name and since I like your name, Benjamin Jr it is," Zora said pecking his lips.
"Okay let's go to sleep because we have the ultrasound appointment tomorrow and we're both on call tomorrow," Ben said turning off the lamp. Zora turned her back to Ben as he scooted close and wrapped his arm around her belly.
The next morning Zora laid on the exam table as Ben stood beside her waiting to get their seven month ultrasound. Alright both Dr. Warrens, let's look at this beautiful baby," Dr. Cruz stated excitedly.
The couple grinned from ear to ear waiting to hear the sound of their son's heartbeat. Dr. Cruz's face went from happy to concerned then sad. She stopped doing the ultrasound and turned to them.
"Why'd you stop doing the ultrasound," Zora asked getting anxious.
"I can't find a heartbeat, I will have another doctor come in," Dr. Cruz said getting up and leaving.
Ben and Zora looked at each other reading each other's thought about the worse possible outcome happening to them. They did the ultrasound a second time with a new machine and still no heartbeat.
"I'm so sorry to have to tell you that the baby has died in your womb Dr. Warren, I'm so sorry," Dr. Cruz informed as Zora let out a cry and scream that Ben would never forget.
Ben once again was jolted out of his sleep but was thankful for the ceiling fan that kept him from sweating profusely. He turned over and looked at his alarm clock to see that it was 12pm so he decided to get up and go for a run.
After his run he made some lunch and then watched tv all afternoon and thinking about Miranda on and off wondering if she was truly okay. He knew that she was happier now that she had her son back but he also knew she still had a lot of healing to do from the things that happened to her.
By 7pm he was tired of being in his apartment alone and decided to go out and have some fun. He showered and got dressed in a baby blue T-shirt and dark washed jeans with brown shoes and headed to Ora Nightclub.
Ben arrived at the bar and order two shots and a whiskey before a woman who looked to be biracial with super curly brown hair came and sat beside him and kept staring him down. He looked over at her and smiled, she was pretty, with a petite but athletic body.
"What's your name?" she asked giving him a sexy look.
"My name is Ben and yours," he replied.
"Lauren, do you want dance with me Ben?" Lauren asked.
They got on the dance floor and Ben held her by her lower back as they danced slowly to the music. "She's slightly shorter than Miranda and not as thick. Why am I thinking about Miranda's thickness?" Ben thought to himself.
He focused his attention back on Lauren as she turned around and started grinding against him. He tired his best not to get hard but he could tell that she was grinding hard and steady against his crotch on purpose and it was working.
When she felt him harden she looked back and smiled. "You like what I'm giving you Ben?" She asked in a sexy voice and Ben just nodded as he held onto her waist.
"I could give it to you better if you want to get out of here," Lauren suggested.
"Let's go then," Ben said grabbing her hand and leading her out of the nightclub.
Lauren lead Ben into her apartment that wasn't far from the nightclub and she quickly began pulling at his clothes, taking his shirt off and unbuckling his jeans as she kissed his muscular chest. Ben hadn't had sex in a very long time so he was hoping that this one night stand would be worth it.
Lauren back away from him and guided him towards her bedroom as she did a strip tease. Once in her bedroom she grabbed a condom out of her nightstand and tore it open as Ben walked towards her. She slowly slid it onto his manhood and then Ben picked her up and slowly guided her down onto himseyand she moaned loudly.
"Oh my gosh Ben your so big baby," Lauren said as she moaned and he held her up against her bedroom wall as he pounded her deep and hard and she kissed all over his neck and chest.
"Oh gosh I'm almost there Ben, harder?" Lauren requested loudly. They had sex all over her room, in the chair by the window, on the floor, on top of the small desk in the corner and on Lauren's bed.
Morning came and Ben was laying on his back because Lauren had fallen asleep on his chest. He slowly moved her off of him and got up to get dressed. Lauren woke up and smiled as she watched Ben get dressed.
"Good morning," she said softly as she stretched.
"Good morning," Ben replied.
"You are such a quiet lover, you were amazing but quiet. Maybe we can do this again soon but you bring the condoms this time because you used up my brand new pack I just bought," Lauren stated.
Ben smirked at her comment, "Last night was good Lauren and I thank you for it but I just needed a one night stand. I just need to relief some built up tension and stress so thank you for helping me do that," Ben explained as he finished dressing.
Lauren got up out of the bed and sashayed over to her desk and wrote something on a sticky note. Once she was done she walked over to Ben wearing her nakedness confidently and put the sticky note in his jean pocket.
"If you decide to change your mind here is my number," Lauren said as she grabbed her robe and walked him to the front door.
Miranda sat in her bedroom looking for apartments on her laptop and thinking about how she enjoyed her week with her son. She bought him lots of new clothes, and toys and they spent most of their days playing and doing whatever Tuck wanted to do. She just missed the chaos of her energetic two year old so she let him have his way.
Even with the joy and happiness of having her son she couldn't stop thinking about Ben and how visibly upset he was with her though he never said it. And she was afraid to call because she knew he would just try to convince her to stay with him but she didn't want to be watched over or treated like a victim.
But she missed the friendship and companionship they had started to create and she didn't want to let that go. Although she knew that he would probably be upset with her she decided to go see about him since he hadn't contacted her either. She decided that in the morning she would drive over to his place and see him before he went to work.
The next morning Miranda arrived at Ben's place and knocked on his door. She didn't get a answer and she didn't hear any movement. Ben always told her to use her key whenever she needed to so she found his key on her key ring and opened the door. When she walked in she looked at how much of a disarray his apartment was in and when she walked through she realized he wasn't there.
The bag he usually would take to work was still there so he wasn't at work. Miranda decided to clean up his place and wait for him to come back.
Ben walked slowly towards his apartment, he decided to call out of work and schedule a session with his therapist to get his mind back on track. He unlocked his door and when he walked in Miranda was sitting on his couch and she stood up and smiled slightly as she looked at him.
"Hey," Miranda said nervously.
Ben gave a slight smile before walking pass her into his bedroom. She could smell the scent of alcohol and a woman's perfume on him so she followed him into his bedroom.
"Ben….are you okay?" Miranda asked softly and he just went into the bathroom and turned on the shower. She turned the tv and sat on the bed just flipping the channels. Ben came out of the shower wrapped in a towel and he stopped seeing her sitting on his bed.
Miranda looked at the blank look on Ben's face and knew that he had buried his emotions because she usually could always see how he was feeling just by the look on his face.
Ben walked to his dresser and pulled out his boxers, a burgundy t-shirt and socks, he quickly pulled them on before taking off the towel then put on his t-shirt and socks.
"Ben can we talk please? Can you not ignore me, I'm sorry," Miranda said putting the remote down and crossing her legs.
"I have a therapy session to go to in 45 minutes so I can't talk right now Miranda," Ben said putting on pants but then stopped and sighed deeply.
"We can talk later after I come back," Ben spoke in a low voice.
Miranda smiled in agreement and followed him back into the living room. "Well I guess I'll be here waiting," Miranda said cheerfully and Ben just gave her a look as he walked out the door.
"And hopefully you will be in a better mood after your therapy session," Miranda said to herself after the front door closed.
Ben sat on the couch in his therapist office looking down as she just stared at him with her notepad on her lap and a pen in hand.
"I can tell by the slight wrinkles under your eyes that you haven't been getting restful sleep. Have the dreams started back," Dr. Kennedy asked.
"Yes," Ben answered.
"Do you think you know what is triggering them," she asked and Ben nodded his head yes.
"This woman….I have been helping her….being a support system for her during a rough patch that she's been going through. And she has basically been living with me because I offered it as an option because she didn't want to get other professional help. Obviously since she is the topic of our conversation that wasn't smart for my mental health. But this past week she decided that she didn't need me anymore, and it upset me and just reminded me how everyone I love or care about ends up leaving me somehow," Ben explained.
"Which is why you shut people out. I'm surprised by the fact that you allowed yourself to become attached to the point that it's triggering your dreams, which means something," Dr. Kennedy replied.
"I know….it's just something about her that draws me to her, makes me feel happy and at peace….like I found something special. But not like in a romantic way although she is gorgeous and amazing….I don't think I'm ready for that. But there is a connection that I feel to her that makes me feel at home and I think she does too. She was in my apartment this morning when I came in from having a one night stand last night," Ben confessed.
"So if she showed up then maybe she is feeling the same way you feel about her. Did you talk about how what she did made you feel," Dr. Kennedy asked.
"No I was still upset about her leaving and not staying in contact with me for a week. But I told her that we could talk when I got back," Ben answered.
"The fact you let her in so quickly says a lot but I don't want you to become codependent of her. But seeing as though she came back maybe you do have a connection, just make sure it's a healthy one for the both of you so communicate well," Dr. Kennedy expressed.
Ben got back home and Miranda was in the kitchen making food. She stopped what she was doing and looked at him.
"Hi," Ben said as he closed the door and put his keys on the foyer table.
"Hey," Miranda answered as she continued to chop vegetables.
Ben put his hands in his pockets as he walked into the kitchen towards her and leaned against the counter. "You wanted to talk," Ben said softly.
Miranda turned around and looked at him, "I'm sorry….for leaving and possibly making you feel like you're not important. I just didn't want to feel helpless and like a victim. In such a short amount of time you have become my friend and I need that and I think you need that too," Miranda confessed.
"I'm sorry for giving you the silent treatment, that was childish. I just don't let people into my life easily and that night I could've easily done what I knew was medically correct for you. But that's not what you wanted and I felt completely drawn to you. When I care I end up being left alone and I felt like that's what was happening when you decided to leave. But I understand and I have no intentions of treating you like a victim or helpless. But I do want to be there for you and support you and be your friend…maybe even family because I don't have any family," Ben confessed.
Miranda was teary eyed as she looked into his beautiful, glossy brown eyes and she rushed to hug him. Ben closed his eyes and embraced her as well as being reminded of the hug she gave him a week before and he wanted nothing more than to always be a recipient of her loving embrace.
Miranda continued to hold him as she looked up at him, "I didn't know you don't have any family….Tuck and I can be your family if you'll let us," Miranda said.
Ben wiped the tears off of her cheeks, "I would like that a lot," Ben said in a whisper.