I guess I should know better. I'm a lovesick girl who thought that maybe her plea would help my "knight in shining armour", my Paladin, to find me against all odds. Nada.

To be fair. I've made it very hard to send me an email. I figured the guy I'm looking for would be smart enough to find me. Also, to be fair. He's had less than 24 hours, so I should give myself a break there.

On the plus side, all the mouthbreather comments I expected were there, so it's pretty much just like reading slashdot, Digg (back in the day) or Reddit (the new toilet of the internet).

Another comment suggested I go to church. I almost pissed myself laughing. Sorry "promise keepers" (you pussy whipped pieces of shit). You deserve whoever you end up with.

One interesting comment said I should go to a library. Hang around the math section or the science-fiction section. But not the computer section, I could write those books. That made feel pretty good. The first two were not the worst suggestions I've heard.

I may turn off commenting. I'll give it a few days.

I also had some hackers try to crack the blog. Seriously dudes? 192/172/10/169 addresses are for idiots. I was able to find out who you were.

And I'm guessing you know it by now if you're computer is smoking.

Fuckin' idiots.

One of my favourite things is to talk to a guy who thinks he knows more about computers than I do. I'm not saying it's impossible, I'm just saying that *I* have not run into him. Not even fucking close.

Again. Apologies to my future soulmate. I will *never* swear in front of you. I try to keep that online :)

Would you look at that? Obviously I have no markdown parsing in my code. Time to fix that… hold on… There we go. Bold as advertised.

Some of the comments asked me why I just don't go to a bar and pick up a guy. To answer you mouthbreather (yup, markdown now works), I'm not going to humblebrag, but I can probably pick up any guy if I was that desperate.

To tell you the truth, I don't want to pick up a guy I can find in a bar. As far as I'm concerned NO guy in a bar will dance with you unless he wants to get laid. When I see guys dancing in a bar, that's the first thing I think of. I've gone to a few with my friend Max (she's Maxine, but don't fucking' call her that.) We went there for drinks, not to get laid. She has great red hair, she could pick up a guy in seconds… but she's a little like me. Wants that one true love. I guess that's why we're such good friends. She doesn't have a blog though. Sorry guys. She doesn't do that "nerd shit" as she likes to put it.

A few seconds after I published my blog last night, I started to write a program to crawl the internet. Note to hackers, the web is not the internet. That's what makes you fuckin' idiots.

These "hackers" don't even know what a bang path email address is. (hint. I still have one, and it still works. Then again, I have my own DNS server, and can write Perl code in my sleep)

I don't know what I was expecting to find. That kind search really requires lazy fuzzy matches.

How do you search for "my soulmate who sat across from on the bus? BTW, he should be gorgeous and smart."

I can't stop thinking about that guy. If there is an internet god, throw me a bone ok?

I wonder what his name was, what does he do? Ah, fuck. I never even thought to check for a ring.

I will not be a homewrecker. Shit. Shit. Shit.

Ok. Had to stop typing. I was feeling a little sorry for myself.

I guess I'm a lot lonlier than I thought. I would give almost anything to be able to curl up next to my soulmate at night, kiss, and just fall asleep in his arms.

Sigh.

So the day after my move to the big city is a big fuckin' zero.

Sorry soulmate, I'm just bitter.

Eleven loves you.

XXXXX

Way too long between blogs for me. It's not that there isn't enough tech news to blog about. But I can't stop thinking about that girl I saw on the bus.

I know what you are thinking. "Dude it's just some chick on a bus. There are a ton of beautiful girls on the web."

Well, asshat. That's where you are wrong. It's not just some girl. Aside from the fact that she was physically appealing, she was smart. She had a look of innocence and sadness about her. I just wanted to hug her, comfort her… She was so pretty I… (big sigh here)... she had very pretty eyes… her hair was cute, very very short… she had a dimple when she smiled. Did I mention she was really pretty?

I had to stop typing. I got too emotional. If you are out there pretty girl. I'm almost positive I love you, I want to get to know you. I want to be with you..

I checked my stats for the blog. Dropped a few subscriptions (mostly guys, guess they didn't like my last sappy blog entry). I more than made up for it by the amount of female commentors, and subscribers.

As you can see everyone of them said that they were not the girl on the bus, but that they were smart and not that bad looking. They'd be willing to meet me.

I don't even know what to say to that without sounding like I was cheating on her. You know. The girl on the bus.

I know I went on about how pretty this girl was, but really. Looks are minor to me. I like smart. I think girls like that too, and I've heard they like a sense of humour, but none of them ever told me. I've read it on the internet. LOL. Yeah, the final bastion of truth. The Internet.

Hmm, I wonder if I post on some of the city websites if that's worth a try?

I think I may be lovelorn, but she doesn't even know who I am.

XXXXX

[Email from Madmax to Eleven]

El! What the fuck are you doing? Your blog sounds like a lovesick teenager. I'm sorry girl, I didn't know you were that lonely. I'll shut up now.

[Reply Email from Eleven to Madmax]

Sorry Max. I'm really taken with the guy I saw. I mean, I actually felt something. Not just physical, you'd want do this guy too if you saw him. You know me Max, this isn't the way I am. There was something there dammit.

[Email from Ranger to Paladin]

Do we need to talk? You went from a blog series walking us through your favourite text editors, to how much you creamed your jeans over that girl.

[Reply Email from Paladin to Ranger]

Lucas, don't' be so crude. I'm telling you right now. She is not like any other girl. Not like any I've met, and not like any I haven't met. I'm sure of it.

XXXXX

It was probably 3 or 4 in the morning, but I finished that crawler program. All assembly, bitches :)

I think it ran for a total of eleven seconds (yay!) before it gave me two hits.

One was ok whoever it is, bigtime nerd, I expected that, and probably like twice my age. The other was , the site was down, so the hosting service could have been doing updates. I'll let it run all night to see what it brings up.

My best friend kind of shit all over me for this blog. I already feel sorry for the boyfriend she gets. I mean she's beautiful, gorgeous red hair, she's feisty but she's loyal. See Max? Maybe this blog can do double duty. Get you a boyfriend too… LOL Joking!

I think I may be obsessing about this guy. I know what my chances are. This city's population is almost 2 million.

No way I'm going to find him. Not with the little time I have in the city for my current contract.

He may be a Luddite and technology the last thing on his mind.

I'm sorry soulmate. I think I may be the girl you are looking for.

And I can't find you.

Not yet, but I'm not stupid. I will.

Eleven loves you.

XXXXX

I think now is the time to say you should not be trolling for girls on the internet. At all.

I wasn't trolling. I was just describing a situation that happened on the bus.

I'm back in my hometown now where I live, and can work from home. My trip was successful, at least the business part. My heart still stings a bit though.

I now have to face the wrath of one of my best friend. He thinks I wimped out a little bit on my blog.

Ok, maybe a little. I don't care.

If you are out there pretty girl.

I love you.