The City was a crowded place, not at all like the Reef. Everywhere she looked there were people, humans and earthborn and exo in bright garments, yelling out market prices, children running, people talking and laughing together.
Petra had never felt so alone.
They liked it here, the busy, the filth, the noise. None of them knew real art, real beauty, real purpose. Not like the awe-inspiring, towering statues of regal Queens, techeuns and heroes, not like the marble palaces, temples, towers, not like the sprawling hills and cliffs and rivers. Everything here was built of a hideous conglomeration of metal and concrete. The people here were not wise like the awoken of the reef were. They did not map the stars, they did not weave fate with a careful eye, they did not meditate on purpose and destiny. They were a simple people, as bland as their food.
Petra was consumed by a fierce homesickness. Even the Tangled Shore was better than this, a twisted, mysterious, elegant enigma nestled among the stars. She longed for the Reef, and her only greater longing was for Uldren. She missed their conversation, how they could talk and share everything without even realizing they were openly discussing their deepest secrets without a second thought, how he understood the world, how he understood her. She missed his laugh, his smile, the familiarity between them, the way he knew when something was wrong before she could even say a word. The way his eyes told her just how he was feeling and how much he loved her whenever she let herself get lost in their depths. She had thought, that one afternoon, that there might actually be a chance for her, that there might have been more afternoons like that one waiting for her, wrapped up in Uldren's arms, the wind and his fingers in her hair, held tight in a kiss. She had known it then, for certain, that she was hopelessly in love with him. Never in her life had she felt anything so wonderful. Sometimes it was gentle, sometimes it was fiercely passionate, but it was always tender, this love they shared so freely with each other.
But that evening had destroyed every future afternoon in one blow. She was banished, and here there was no solitude. If he did come visit her, as he had promised, there was no place fit for them to meet, no place to escape the noise and the crowds. There were a few quiet corners, but with lights so fluorescent it made her sick, with storage carts of broken equipment, and with the nasty smell of mold. There would be no place for them to find privacy except the little apartment she was staying in.
She heard distant bells ringing, marking the end of the lunch-hour, a time when most workers were all allowed an hour to eat. It was a silly idea, really, since it crowded the markets and the bazaar so that hardly anyone could really eat in peace. She had learned to wait until a little after the bell rang to get her lunch.
She pushed her way across the courtyard, slipping down a corridor and walking down the stairs, rolling her eyes as a couple young guardians leaped over the railing, floating down to the bottom in a few seconds. It was still quite noisy, but less crowded, when she stepped out of the dim halls into the sunlit bazaar. She stepped into a line to order a bowl of spicy ramen at a food truck. It was decently spicy for ramen, although it didn't deserve the title "Spicy Ramen" when the same bowl in the reef would have been considered mild and the city's regular ramen was barely noodles and water.
She sat cross-legged on the concrete by the edge of the city wall, looking down at the rest of the city beneath her, bowl of ramen between her knees. How nice it would be, to sit here with Uldren, talking about life. Perhaps he would sit close to her and put his arm around her, maybe she would even rest her head on his shoulder, close her eyes… but she mustn't think of lovely things like that. It would only make her miss him more.
She threw the empty bowl away, sighing and striding back toward the hall leading back up to the hall leading back up to the courtyard, and accidentally bumped into a woman carrying a stack of crates. The boxes tumbled to the ground. One fell open, and a pile of red and pink streamers and banners fell out.
"I'm so sorry!" Petra blurted, embarrassed, bending to help the old woman.
"Oh, it's nothing, dear, don't think of it at all," the woman reassured her.
She pushed the folded banners back into the boxes. "What's all this for?"
The woman beamed. "Decorations for the Crimson Days! But it isn't till February. I wasn't expecting this shipment until much later. It's a celebration of love," she explained, seeing the blank look on Petra's face. "There are games, competitions, on teams of two: you and your crimson bond, the one you love."
Uldren's face, his charming smile and golden eyes, popped into her mind, but she dismissed the thought. This was a city celebration.
"Are you new here, dear?"
"Yes," she answered, distracted.
She beamed again. "Welcome to the city, then! My name is Eva Levante, and you may call me Eva. Who are you?"
"Oh, I am an awoken, of the Reef."
Eva Levante laughed warmly. "But that's not who you are."
She blinked, startled. That was, indeed, who she was! Did she not understand? Petra swallowed and tried again. "I- I serve Queen Mara Sov."
"Your name, dear, what is your name?"
Her name! How could her name be who she was, rather than home or purpose? Were those not more important? She tried to answer over the lump forming in her throat. "Petra."
"Petra. Welcome to the City, Petra. I'll see you around!" Eva smiled, carrying her crates away.
"I hope I won't be staying long," Petra muttered. She felt more miserable and lonely than before. These people didn't understand at all! An answer as simple as "I work at the ramen shop over there" or "I teach disabled children how to read" would have given her a better glimpse of this woman's life than "I am Eva Levante!" She still knew nothing about her. She would never get to know anyone here, and she wasn't sure she wanted to. She couldn't bear this for long.