"This date is going to be the best! You can be a great boyfriend and impress anyone if you want to. You're gonna do great!" Jerry affirmed to himself in the mirror.

It was late afternoon and he was getting ready for his first date with his boyfriend Scott Will Eventually Take A Look At The First Megaman Wozniak (Working Title). He thought if he played his cards right Scott can become Scott Will Eventually Take A Look At The First Megaman Wozniak (Working Title) – Attricks. 'That fantasy wont be fulfilled for a long time so lets live in the present' He thought to himself.

He put on his date outfit that consisted of his nicer white button down and burgundy sweater. He wore slacks and his newer shoes. He gave his mustache a brush and was on his way to meet his lovely boyfriend at the hottest restaurant in the county.

A few miles away at an apartment, Scott was dressing up for this date.

"Hey All, Scott here! I'm going on my first date! I will probably even have… sex again. As someone who until recently was a recreational certified notarized virgin I don't have a lot of experience with dating. I put all my training into Tinder scrolling."

A game was suddenly thrown at his head. He picked it up.

"What the fuck is a Tokimeki Memorial?"

It was 6 o'clock in the evening. Jerry sat at their reserved table at the popular restaurant Stale Pretzels. He started getting a bit nervous that somehow Scott had to cancel, but he appeared and sat in his chair.

"Hey boyfriend, Scott here!"

"Hey Scott, boyfriend here." Jerry replied with a smile.

"Gomen I'm late, you WONT believe the things I did today Jerry-san."

Jerry looked confused at what Scott said. "What did you say?"

"Daijoubu, I swear. I just did a lot of studying to be the konpeki kareshi on this date."

Jerry didn't know how to respond. He tried to think about how to handle the sudden weeaboo speak his boyfriend was spouting. "Um…aishiteru?" Scott continued trying to salvage this situation.

Jerry stood up. "I have to use the restroom. I'll be back."

"Hai." Scott nervously said while looking down at the table.

When Jerry was out of sight Scott put his head down on the table. 'Oh gahd, I knew trying an anime dating sim was a bad idea.' He thought.

A waiter came to the table with two waters on a tray. "Ok, I got two waters, do you two need more time for you orders." Scott lifted his head he heard the familiar voice.

"Jeb, you shigoto here?"

"Yup. I needed extra money to run Gex-con. I'm trying to find more people like me. I mean, 'If you build it, Gex will come.' That's what they always say."

"Minna says that?"

"Why are you speaking weeb?"

"Dareka taskete!" Scott grabbed Jeb by the arm. "I need to yamete my word hole!"

"Something like this happened when I read the Gex manga. I know what to do!" Jeb assured Scott.

Meanwhile in the restroom Jerry was scrolling through Therapedia for tips to deal with Scott's sudden case of weeaboo. He found a link to an article on weeb speak and how to make your client stop. It was a 3-step list with detailed instructions and a content warning that if it was done badly it can be contagious.

"Step 1 is gonna be hard." He said to himself.

Jerry came back to the table and noticed Scott was nowhere to be found. Jeb tapped his shoulder behind him to get his attention. "Hey if you're looking for Scott he said to come to his car."

"Thanks." Jerry said rushing out the door.

He ran to Scott's car and climbed in. Scott, teary eyed look at Jerry. He was embarrassed to ruin his first date. Jerry placed his hands on his shoulders and looked into those beautiful eyes. He deepened his voice to be the most seductive he could. "がまんできない."

Scott's eyes widened and Jerry rushed into the kiss him deeply. Their tongues intertwined and as they held each other close. Jerry moved to kissing his neck and one of his hands moved to his crotch. He started caressing the area around his dick to tease Scott. He unzipped his pants and used one finger to stroke his cock to tease him further. This made Scott gasp a bit as his dick grew more. Jerry began to take his boyfriend's manhood in his hand and stroked it in his hand for a moment. Then he stopped which made Scott look at him to see what was wrong.

'Ok I got him distracted from talking. Time for the next step.' Jerry thought. "Scott" he began. "I'm sorry for having to do this, but it's step 3." He sighed before continuing. "Madden 08 is anime."

"NO IT'S NOT!" Scott yelled. What followed was a 10-minute rant on how anyone could confuse the magnificent Madden 08 with as something lowbrow as anime. How a game known to be very anti-virgin could even be confused for something very pro-virgin like Naruto. This was probably the biggest profane ridden rant he ever heard from Scott since Chibi-Robo Zip Lash. The most noticeable thing was that he finally lacked weeb speak.

"You're cured of weeb speak. Congrats!" Jerry interrupted after 10 minutes of Madden 08 yelling.

"Hey!" Scott realized. "I am! Jeb was right!"

"Jeb was right about what?"

"He said one of the things that helped him was occupying his mouth with something else."

"The first step!" Jerry started. "The second step was to say something in actual Japanese to confuse or intimidate any weeb."

"And the third?" Scott asked.

"Make the weeb so mad over something they drop the speak entirely."

"Well, that makes sense." Scott held Jerry's hand. "I'm sorry I ruined our date trying to make it perfect."

"It's ok. I was a bit nervous too. However, the night is still young."

"What about our food?"

"Don't worry about it, we can have it delivered. Although I'm craving something else." Jerry told him while looking at his loins.

Later that night Jeb came through the door to his home. "Terry! I'm home!" he yelled out. "You wont believe what happened at work today. I had to tell Jerry Attricks the cure for weeb speak. I wonder how he kept his mouth busy during step 1?"

"Probably did the same thing you would do if it was me." Terry said revealing himself from a door. He was wearing an apron that said [Kiss me I'm Vegan] and nothing else. "Would you like dinner, a bath, or my dick?" he said to Jeb while giving him bedroom eyes.

"Dick please." Jeb replied walking over to Terry to rip that apron off to do some vegan friendly oral sex on his husband.