Hi everyone, I haven't given up on this fic I am just a very sporadic writer! I will be continuing to (randomly) update this fic throughout the year, balancing it with my uni work and procrastination. I had a lot of fun with this chapter: before anyone asks, yes everyone is absolutely in character, I did not change any of their personalities. Please enjoy.

Ginny stared at herself in the mirror and nodded proudly. In the past few months of preparation for the Lovegood Gauntlet the entire Weasley family had bulked up: Percy now had abs, Charlie's muscles had become even bigger than before and Mrs Weasley's shoulders were broader than Arnold Schwarzenegger's. However, the change had been most apparent in Ginny: although fit from playing Quidditch, she had always had a small build. But her work swigging protein shakes, eating nothing but chicken and rice and constantly weightlifting had paid off: in the span of a few months she had gone from a clothes size of XS to XL, all of that muscle. Luna had always been taller but Ginny now overshadowed her through sheer width. Luna thought her new body was extraordinarily beautiful, and Ginny was inclined to agree: she now looked like a very short, ginger Hagrid. Oh yes, this was the body that would pass the Lovegood Gauntlet.

It was the evening before the challenge, and none of the Weasley's were nervous in the slightest. In fact, after witnessing their incredible weightlifting transformation from the spiritual realm, the Lovegood ghosts had sent messages (written in blood on the walls) politely asking to call off the battle, informing Ginny they had made a mistake and would be all too delighted to welcome her into the Lovegood family without any Gauntlet to speak of, and could she please inform her family there was no need for any fighting whatsoever. However, the Weasleys were by now so hench and filled with an excitement that could only be exorcised through a violent battle with ghosts they had refused, insisting it go ahead. The only problem was Harry. Sulky about being forced to relinquish his lessons with Voldemort he had refused to participate in any of the gym session, preferring instead to sit on the side lines and read books about fighting the Dark Arts while shooting Dumbledore pointed looks. He had thus had remained as weedy as ever. Ginny sighed, watching in the mirror as her neck muscles rippled even at this tiny movement, thinking of how disappointed she was in the Boy-who-Lived.

Luna came into the room. The Weasleys had all decided to take a rest day except Ginny, who was in the gym getting in a bit of last-minute training. The blonde was carrying an enormous plate laden with roast chicken and broccoli, Ginny's post-workout snack.

'Here you go love', she said, setting the plate down on a shelf. 'What do you want to do this evening? Watch a movie? Take a walk?' She fidgeted with her hair, evidently anxious. 'You'll be fine', she murmured, reassuring herself more than Ginny, 'you've all been training for months.'

Ginny stretched out on the floor and began to munch on a chicken leg. 'Luna, we'll be ok. I looked at portraits of your ancestors, they're all beanpoles, we'll crush them in a minute. How about we have a walk round the lake, so you can wind down?'

/

'What do you mean he's up to something?', hissed Voldemort. 'It's me who's meant to be making the cunning schemes! He's just meant to sit there, do nothing and then inevitably fight me when my plan comes to fruition!' Voldemort felt rather put out by the turning of the tables; it put him on edge, upset the comfortable pattern that he and Potter had settled into. To be honest, it was really rather hurtful that the boy had gone behind his back and begun his own scheme. Voldemort had begun to enjoy the battles they had, which as an act of courtesy he always carefully timed so they happened right at the end of the school year so the boy could focus on his school work. Well, next time he would make it so that he got into Hogwarts just before exam season, see how Potter liked not being able to revise. That would show him. Draco looked as though he might pass out. He was shaking so hard Voldemort thought he may spontaneously combust with fear, which made him feel a bit better. He took another canape off of the proffered plate that Pettigrew was still holding, deciding that he did quite like the salmon after all. As he bit into it he nodded at the blonde. 'Smmmffh!'

Draco looked at him anxiously. 'I-I'm sorry, what did you say my Lord?'

Voldemort swallowed his tartlet. 'I said speak!'

Lucius watched as The Dark Lord digested the information that Potter was involved in training for The Lovegood Gauntlet (along with the rest of the canapes). Overall he seemed to be taking it quite well, even starting to laugh. Lucius began to feel much less anxious and out of the corner of his eye saw Narcissa let out a relieved sigh. He took a long swig of wine, beginning to feel hungrier now that the threat of being crucioed seemed to be going down.

Suddenly Voldemort looked at him, still smiling.

'So Lucius, what do you say to my plan?'

'I'm sorry, my Lord?'

'The plan! Have you been listening at all?'

In truth Lucius had not. He had been focusing instead on eating now that he had gotten his appetite back: in the span of 15 minutes he had ingested his canapes, about 60 roast potatoes and half a roast swan, making up for the food he had been unable to eat in the past few days. 'Hahaha, oh yes, the plan' he said guiltily, setting his knife and fork down. Voldemort looked slightly mollified.

'So, we are sneaking into this Lovegood Gauntlet tomorrow! Lucius, make sure to be ready to dramatically reveal my entrance. We will defeat Harry in style: surprise him when he is at his weakest as he will be being attacked by ghosts and then, in front of everyone, crush him once and for all. You, Narcissa and Draco will of course sneak in to watch the battle and then when he is locked in battle, you will press your Dark Mark-' here, Voldemort made a flamboyant gesture toward his forearm- 'and Voila! Yours truly will arrive.' Voldemort began to hum, now tucking into the cheesecake that Pettigrew had brought him (Lucius recognised it: on sale for £1 at Aldi. He could only hope that The Dark Lord did not notice the subpar standard of the dessert. He would have to punish Pettigrew for not going to Waitrose later). At last, thought Lucius, after tomorrow when The Dark Lord won the Malfoys would finally get the respect they deserved in society. He took up his cutlery and once again ploughed into his food. He would need the extra energy tomorrow.

/

It was three hours before the Gauntlet, and the ghosts of Luna's family were beginning to appear, looking extremely anxious. Even wearing their Robes of Infinite Wisdom (as all ghost ancestors were granted) they looked small and pathetic next to the hulking forms of the Weasleys: Ginny felt rather sorry for them in a superior way. As Percy began oiling his newly-grown muscles and Mrs Weasley flexed her enormous pecs in preparation, crowds of people had begun to flock to witness the extraordinary sight of such a battle: they had brought camping chairs, blankets and pillows and food trucks had begun to set up shop, displaying specials on noticeboards labelled things like The Weasley Combo (roast chicken, fried chicken and grilled chicken all on a bed of broccoli, served with a huge protein shake) and Lovegood lollies (each ice lolly shaped like a different ancestor). The atmosphere was festive, and Ginny began to hum a tune as she tucked into her fourth Weasley Combo.

/

'For fuck's sake Narcissa, stop dropping that carpet!'

Narcissa picked up her end of the carpet she was carrying, trying to look as dignified and nonchalant as possible. She flicked a strand of pale blond hair out of her eyes, then eyed her husband darkly.

'Well, maybe if someone didn't have the bright idea to roll out a red carpet for the Dark Lord we wouldn't be in this mess!'

'Listen Narcissa, he told me to give him a dramatic entrance. What else was I meant to do?'.

Lucius found a place in the crowd and hobbled awkwardly toward it, clutching his end of the enormous plush carpet they were carrying. Luckily, it didn't look as suspicious as it might have due to the crush of people all with picnic mats and enormous carrier bags: hopefully people would just assume that the Malfoys, in their typical flamboyant style, had decided to picnic in comfort. Draco tagged behind them, clutching a Waitrose bag filled with wraps, olives and crisps from the delicatessen, complaining about the loss of Dobby as he staggered under the weight of the food and drinks cans (San Pellegrino). They began to set up camp, trying to look as casual as possible: alas, their anonymity was not to last.

'Malfoy! What are you doing here?'

Draco turned to stare at Potter, noticing how weedy his arms were compared to the Weasleys'. It would be easy pickings for Voldemort to finish him off, and he smoothly drawled 'here to watch you fail', laughing derisively and tucking into a Waitrose pickled onion. However, as they Boy Who Lived spluttered, aimed a punch at him (which missed pathetically due to his lack of training in recent months) and then stormed off, surrounding families began to notice the ruckus.

'Hey, aren't those the Malfoys?', yelled one man- 'those slimy gits can't go anywhere without causing trouble!' Lucius attempted to cut the man off with a superior look. However, the effectiveness of this usually devastating glance was somewhat lessened by the Peppa Pig paper plate he was clutching: as people began to point and laugh, Lucius cursed Pettigrew for not packing of the usual china, which was being saved for the post-Voldemort taking over feast. Amidst a chorus of boos, Draco gritted his teeth, deciding that when Voldemort made his entrance he would personally kill every boo-er with his own bare hands.

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