Ever since Ember returned, the three of us have been taking turns between protecting our shelter and hunting. Even Alvin has gone outside, but only with Ember and never for longer than an hour. They're currently out now.
If I were stronger, I would have left by now. Ever since Ember reunited with Alvin, they've been pretty much ignoring me. Ember only instigates conversation when she wants to make sure my legs still have blood flowing through them. To ensure my body stays warm enough, we've been having to light the fireplace. Although we don't let it burn for too long, Ember's worried the smoke will bring out the Careers sooner or later.
I've been alone for about an hour when the two of them return from their most recent rotation. Ember has filled the knapsack with fruit and a few rodents she caught with her knife. Not that food has been too much of an issue. My pre-game charisma paid off. We've received numerous sponsor gifts, from matches to food to water and medicine. Everything has come exactly when we needed it and it's always enough. I don't expect it to last forever, but I'm taking advantage of it.
"Alvin and I think we need to move houses." She passes me a handful of blackberries and I eat them slowly.
"And go where?" I ask, genuinely curious what her plan is.
"Down the road more. There doesn't seem to be much activity down there." Alvin explains. I don't have the energy to resist. Besides, my legs are just warm enough to walk without a limp. We don't take long to gather everything we have. Ember leads the way down the road with Alvin directly next to her and me in the rear.
We go down about two miles before Ember points at one. It looks nearly identical to the one we just left, except some of the features look slightly newer, such as paned glass windows.
Right before we go inside, a cannon fires. We all look at one another. I give Ember a questioning look and she just shrugs. It must be someone falling victim to the Careers.
After I get settled by the firepit and Alvin gets on the cot, Ember says she wants to explore this new area a little more. Alvin protests, but Ember reassures him enough to hang back with me. I'm a little relieved when he agrees to stay. I don't know why I'm so fascinated by him, but I am. I guess I'm so deprived of normal human communication that I'll take anything I can get.
Ember leaves and Alvin and I stay silent for a while. Finally, I break the silence.
"How did you adjust to being blind?" I ask. He shrugs.
"I was born like this." He says so nonchalantly.
"You were?" I'm not sure why this surprises me as much as it does. I just assumed he lost it when he was young.
"Yeah. I was." Wow. I ask him how he copes.
"There's nothing to cope with. It's not a bad thing, Aleida. It's just different." He says, clearly offended by this implication.
I decide not to further engage with him. If I do survive this...is it just that easy to come to terms with it? Alvin certainly doesn't act much different than other boys his age.
Before either of us can say anything else, I hear a faint chatter getting closer and closer. I look outside the window and see Kai and Layna coming down the street.
"We should move our camp here. These are way more secured." Kai complains.
"You have to convince Brighton it's worth it. She won't like wasting energy relocating." Layna responds, irritated.
They stop and search the house next to ours.
"We need to go." I walk over and pull Alvin up. Once the Careers disappear into the other house, Alvin and I leave our shelter and rush to get behind it. As we press our backs against the cold wall, I see Ember jogging up the path back towards us. She sees me and I gesture for her to hide. As soon as she does, the Careers finish up checking the first house before moving next door to ours. I can just barely make out their conversation from outside.
"This blows, I wanted to do more killing." Kai complains.
"We haven't been out that long. Besides, we have killed. Can any other group say the same?" Layna says, kicking something over. It lands with a loud CRASH and I jump.
"I can't believe Brighton let that idiot get away. If it were me out there, I would've killed him in a heartbeat." Kai says. The two of them do their last checks inside before going outside.
"We'll get him soon enough." A shiver runs down my spine, and not just from the cold. If the Careers are actively searching for me, what can I do about it?
Once they get far enough away I motion for Ember to follow me. I take Alvin's hand and guide him into the forest with Ember right behind us. Alvin asks why we aren't returning to the house, so I explain the encounter we almost had and how it's not safe for us there anymore.
"It's not safe for us anywhere." Ember reminds me. Like I don't know that.
"We'll find a place to hide out in. Then we'll find proper shelter tomorrow." While I want to believe this, I know it won't be that easy. Ember complains about my idea until we stumble upon a rock formation with a small caved out section. We all fit within the cave and although it's not as protected as the house, we're out of direct contact with the snow and slightly out of harm's way.
We take our time going through our collection of food and dividing it up equally. I enjoy the silence as I eat, finding myself thinking of home. Not about my family, not even my brother. I think about the district itself. It wasn't fabulous, quite the opposite in fact, and I hated feeling like I was living in an unsolvable maze. But there's something familiar about it. And for the first time since I volunteered, I'm finding myself regretting it.
Last night, the only face to show in the sky was the face of the girl from 7. After the anthem finishes, Ember and Alvin offer to take the first watch. I don't argue, instead I actually appreciate the opportunity to rest. If we're attacked, I need to be well rested.
My dreams are filled with familiar images of my home, my parents, and my brother. I even see Kayle in my dreams. Even though I can see them, they can't see or hear me. I yell as loud as I can to no avail and as I yell, my vision begins to disappear and soon I'm engulfed in black.
I wake up in a sweat.
"Are you okay?" Alvin asks me. I push up to a sitting position and shake it off.
"Yeah, yeah just a nightmare." I tell him. I don't dare tell him the whole truth, mostly because I'm so unsure of what it means. Doubt has been overwhelming me since day 1 and it hasn't gotten any easier.
"Well, wake me in a few hours." Ember tells us before taking the fleece blanket and throwing it over her body. I stand up from the cave and walk a few feet out to stretch my body.
"We need to find proper shelter, Aleida." Alvin tells me.
"I know, and we will. But, somewhere away from the careers. Away from danger." I say without much conviction.
"No offense Aleida, but we're always in danger. It's the Hunger Games." He says, lowering his tone.
"I know that, damnit." I don't mean to snap at him, but I do. Thankfully he remains unbothered.
I realize how dry my throat is, so I scoop a handful of snow into my mouth and let it melt. It's probably full of unimaginable dirt or waste, but since we don't have a permanent water source, it's our first choice. We want to save our water bottles until we need them.
Although I'm itching to do something, I wait for Ember to wake up before I insist we get back on the move. Once we do, some of my anxieties have calmed down.
We get back to the main road without incident and we look around for houses that could be our new base. As I stop in front of one of the houses, I hear running footsteps. Delilah and Cade come running at us, Cade with a large mace and Delilah with throwing knives. They must've been waiting nearby, waiting for us to return.
I block Cade's first hit with my sword and yell at my allies. Ember gets up and throws her knife and Delilah. Delilah dodges and starts aiming her knives towards both Ember and Alvin.
"Out of the way!" Ember grabs Alvin and pulls them behind the trees for safety.
I duck as Cade swings again and manage to cut the back of his leg. He grabs his leg and stumbles, but this merely angers him more. He tackles me, causing me to lose my grasps on my sword and it goes flying into the rock. I lay on my back in the snow as Cade sits on top of me, trying to wrap his hands around my neck. Suddenly, all of Cade's weight is off of me. Alvin tackles him off of me and they both roll on the ground. I stand and grab my sword, looking back from both Cade to Delilah. Delilah advances towards Ember, who is defenseless and afraid. With Delilah distracted, I'm able to get in there with one good sword slice across her stomach. She coughs up blood and falls to her knees, her hands holding her stomach. Cade stands up but his injured leg makes him slow.
"Run!" I grab Alvin's arm and run to Ember who's still behind the tree, frozen in shock. She snaps out of it and comes along with us as we run away, the cannon firing to signal Delilah's death.
After our near death experience, we found shelter within a hidden temple in the woods. The building is a long rectangle with a tall tower coming out of the middle. The pillars on the side are stained green from the moss and cracks run throughout the stone. It sits in the middle of a graveyard, which unsettles me, but it's large and better insulated than either of the houses we've stayed in so far.
Other than a bit of hunting and gathering snow for water, we haven't left the safety of the structure. I think it freaked Ember out, though she won't admit it. In fact, I've been the only one to actually leave. Every time I go out, I consider not returning. But something is holding me back, and I'm not sure what it is. It's not fear; I don't fear death. It's not Ember either, she couldn't care less about me and I feel the same.
So when I suggest we go out and gather more, neither of them are willing to go with me. I shrug it off and gather my supplies. I'm about to walk out when I hear Alvin shout my name. He walks up to me and I turn to face him.
"Let me come with you." He insists.
"Why?" I tilt my head and give him a confused look.
"I need to get out. It's stuffy in here." I consider questioning him. This is the most open space we've been in. I guess he doesn't know that. Or does he?
"Okay. Stay close." I don't want to waste energy arguing. We head outside, bracing for the cold. I secure the temple doors behind me and we slowly make our way through the forest. Thankfully, we quickly come across a fruit tree and we're able to harvest a lot. While we're harvesting, Alvin does something I don't expect. He asks me why I volunteered.
"Because I wanted to." I say nonchalantly.
"Yeah, but there's a reason you're here. People don't just...volunteer for no reason. Even the Careers have their reasons, as dumb as they might be." He says, almost disgusted. Like me choosing to be here offends him, who had no choice.
"Well, I guess I'm just an anomaly." I insist.
"No, you're not. You're holding something in. There's something going on, but you're not sharing it." He comes closer to me. I back up.
"Listen, I didn't come out here to get lectured." I snap at him.
"It's statistically unlikely that either of us will make it out of here alive. No one will know." Yeah, no one but the entirety of Panem if the Gamemakers decide to broadcast this, which they will, unless there's a battle happening elsewhere.
So I just ignore him and he doesn't bring it up again. When we finish gathering food, I tell him I want to continue exploring the arena. He doesn't complain as we traverse the snow. We walk uphill for a while until we reach the top. With the new vantage point, I'm able to see a good amount of the arena. I see the cornucopia, which is almost completely covered in snow, and many of the houses surrounding it. I see a few Careers wandering around the cornucopia, going in and out of the houses. Some talk, some argue, some practice with their weapons. I do a quick mental count in my head, 11 tributes are left and 5 of them are Careers. The odds aren't great for us.
"What do you see?" Alvin asks me in a whisper. I tell him what I see, emphasizing the Career threat.
"We need to deal with them sooner or later." He concludes after I'm done. I agree. But how?
One of the Careers turns in our direction and I immediately drop to the ground. I pull Alvin down with me, but his yelp makes another Career turn in our direction. Glint glares at us and points, before grabbing his weapon and sprinting at us.
"Fuck fuck fuck, we need to go!" I pull Alvin up to his feet and together we run down the hill. We run for a while, and I'm convinced we lost them until I turn around and check. Both Glint and Cade are still on our tails.
We reach the graveyard and I push Alvin behind me. I raise my sword in defense as the two Careers slide to a stop. They both smirk with their weapons raised, but I refuse to show my fear.
"Aww, look at this, has a forbidden romance formed?" Glint taunts me. I scowl.
"You jealous?" I mock him and he just laughs.
"I'll make it quick, gay boy."
I lunge first, slicing at Glint's exposed stomach. He reacts in time and Cade advances towards me, and I just barely block his sword. While I'm distracted, Glint rushes Alvin. Alvin moves out of the way, but it's too late. Glint's sword makes contact with his abdomen and Alvin collapses to the ground.
"No!" A rage explodes inside me. I kick Cade back and adjust the grip on my sword. While he stumbles, I throw it at him, skewering him in the chest. He collapses to the ground, the cannon taking no time to fire.
I turn and see Glint standing over Alvin, weapon raised. I don't hesitate before throwing myself at the Career. He dodges my attack but he keeps his attention on me.
"I'll make his death quick. But not you. You'll get to watch the show. Once I'm done with him, you're next-" He's cut off when he begins coughing up blood. He falls to one knee and I see Ember standing behind him, a knife sticking out of his back. He tries to reach behind him and pull it out, but he can only barely brush the handle with his fingers. Ember pulls it out and the boy yells obscenities and Ember stabs him in the back again. He collapses in the snow and the cannon fires.
With the threat gone, Ember and I rush to Alvin. He's as pale as the snow underneath him. No, that's not true. The snow underneath him is stained crimson red.
"Stay with us, Al." Ember says. She looks at me with a sense of urgency and gestures for me to help her. I pick up his upper body and she gets his legs. We manage to get inside and gently set him on the makeshift bed we had created. I take off my jacket and wrap his wound with it. He coughs and he can't stop shivering.
"He's losing too much blood." Ember says, her voice cracking.
"No, this'll stop it. Or at least...reduce it." I say with no confidence. Alvin shakes his head.
"I feel...fine." He says, his voice weak. Ember and I sit there, staring at each other. I see the tears just beginning to form in Ember's eyes when we hear a small whooshing sound from behind me. I turn and watch a small box with a parachute attached to it land behind me. Another sponsor gift.
I pull the box apart and inside is a small amount of medical supplies. Alcohol, a bandage, and pain pills. I hold it to my chest and whisper a thank you to whoever sent it in.
I carefully remove the jacket from the wound and clean it out with the alcohol. I then wrap it with the bandage. I ask him if he wants any pain pills but he declines. I secure them in my bag and Ember and I spend the next few hours caring for him. When nightfall comes, the anthem shows our two kills, Glint and Cade.
"The Careers will be looking for us." Ember tells me once Alvin is asleep.
"I know." I pull my knees to my chest and rest my head on them. Ember lays down besides Alvin. As she falls asleep, I can't stop my mind from wandering. Less than 10 tributes left, and we consist of a third of them. We've kept Alvin alive...but for how long? I don't know if I can watch him slowly die in front of me. I don't know if I can watch Ember die either. How am I going to get through this?
When I wake up, Alvin isn't any better. He isn't any worse, and the wound doesn't seem to be infected, but he has a fever and he's still as pale as he was yesterday. I see Ember pacing back and forth around the middle of the temple.
"He can't stay here. He needs more medicine, he needs to get somewhere warm." She bites the side of her nail.
"I don't know if you've noticed, but we're in the fucking Hunger Games. We don't have those things." I say, frustrated. She makes it sound like it's so easy.
"No, but, but the Careers might. At the cornucopia." A hint of hope can be heard in her voice.
"Ember, no-" I try to stop her from coming up with any ideas, but she cuts me off.
"We took down two of them yesterday! We can take two more!" She says, grabbing her weapon.
"They outnumber us by one." I tell her.
"Not...not necessarily. Haven't you noticed, they hunt in pairs?" She says.
"I doubt they're going to split up like that. We're nearly at the final eight. They're going to wait until the feast, they're going to kill us off, and then they're going to kill each other." I say. I've watched enough games to know that's what typically happens with the Careers.
"I'm not going to sit around and watch him die!" She picks up a broken piece of wood off the ground and throws it at me. It misses. She picks up her knife and starts to storm towards the door.
"Ember!" I yell at her, but I don't pursue.
"You can either come with me, or stay here and be a coward." She goes outside and slams the door behind her. I swear under my breath, and contemplate running out there with her. But I refuse to leave Alvin alone. He's not getting worse, but he could quickly deteriorate if I'm not here. Any tribute could just walk in here and kill him without a problem. I can't have his blood on my hands.
As the hours pass, he fades in and out of consciousness. I do my best to give him water and feed him small berries, but his appetite is never enough. By midday, he's conscious enough to ask where Ember went. I tell him she went out for food, and he doesn't have the energy to ask any more questions before passing back out.
The sun begins to set when the first cannon fires. My heart drops to my chest. There's no way that doesn't belong to Ember. The cornucopia isn't that far, she would've been back by now.
How am I going to tell Alvin?
Right before the anthem a second cannon fires. I hold my head within my hands, wishing I could disappear.
The anthem plays and the first face in the sky is Ember. She was too young. She had her entire life ahead of her.
The second face is the boy from 7. The face fades to black and we're left in silence.
I was hoping he would get better. He even felt better this morning. But by the mid afternoon, he collapsed. His fever is high, but he's shivering. He's weak, he's dying. And there's nothing I can do to stop it.
His head rests in my lap as I feed him. His breaths are short and raspy, but he manages to keep down what he eats.
"Tell me about District 5." He requests. I'm about to decline, why would I want to talk about home? But I realize this might be his dying request. I couldn't live with myself if he died thinking I was a jerk. I swallow and hold back my emotions.
"It's standard, I think. Most of us work in power plants. The people are...nice. They can be." I try to keep my composure.
"Your family. What are they like?" Awful. They're horrible. They don't deserve a word out of my mouth, nor do they deserve space in his brain. But, maybe, one of them does.
"I have an older brother. His name is Esch. He's my best friend." I swallow back my emotion. I desperately fill my lungs with air, trying to keep my breath steady. Alvin takes my hand.
"Do you miss him?" He asks softly.
"Yeah. I do. I...I didn't get to tell him I love him. At our goodbyes." A tear falls down from my cheek.
"You can tell him when you return home." Alvin coughs.
"If I return home." I say to myself. Alvin either doesn't hear me or doesn't comment.
"Will you tell me the truth now?" He asks softly.
"What truth?" I know the answer before I ask.
"Why did you volunteer?" He stares into my eyes, like he's searching through my soul. I struggle to find the right words.
"I'm going blind." I laugh at the irony and wipe my nose. "I'll be blind in two years. There's nothing I can do about it." Alvin stays silent for a long while before pushing himself up to sitting. He grabs his cane and pulls it over.
"You'll need this." He passes me his cane. "It might be hard at first. Not being able to see. But you'll...you'll be okay." I take the cane and grip it so tightly, I can feel the ache in my fingers. He strokes my cheek, a weak smile forms on his face.
"Win for me, Aleida." I nod. I nod, because I can't find the right words. I nod because he deserves it.
He lays his head back down on my lap, where he stays for hours. The cannon fires by nightfall.