When Neji was ten, he walked downstairs to where his parents were watching a movie in the living room and announced that he was going to marry Hinata and live in a castle. Hinata said the same thing to her parents, who smiled and asked if they could visit. Both children forgot about this within a year, but as time passed, their respective parents sometimes shared the story at family events as a harmless "how cute" thing.
When she was twelve, Hinata's parents enrolled her in singing and voice lessons to try to lessen a speech impediment she'd had since she was four. They'd tried to put her through elocution lessons for a month when she was six, but she ran and hid several times, and kicked her teacher when he would drag her out of her obvious hiding spot. Then, she'd throw terrible tantrums at home. The singing lessons were much more interesting. Her new teacher wasn't condescending. She actually talked to Hinata when her parents were present, rather than addressing her in third person, not looking at her and acting like a speech impediment was a terminal illness. Hinata's singing teacher made a lot more sense and was much more patient. Hinata and her parents were delighted. She got into her school's choir and discovered what it was like to have friends you competed with. And she discovered boys, and how shy she was around them. Answering questions in class was easier, and she hated doing that. She talked to Neji, though.
Neji discovered girls and soccer when he was twelve. He hung out with his teammates constantly. Hinata missed talking to him between classes but didn't say anything about it. She stopped going to as many family events and never just came over anymore. "Choir competitions," her parents said when Neji asked. He missed her, and thought about her a lot. They emailed back and forth often. When Hinata got the news that she was traveling out-of-state for a competition, she ran up to Neji at school and told him right away. He drew her towards him and she hugged him as he congratulated her. His girlfriend walked up and shouted at Hinata, "You stole my position as soprano section leader and now you're stealing my boyfriend? I hate you!"
Neji hadn't told her Hinata was his cousin. "I didn't steal anything. I got it fair and square," Hinata pointed out. Her remark was drowned out by Neji's teammates' laughter. Both girls misinterpreted the laughter and ran off in opposite directions. Neji honestly thought his girlfriend would get over it, so it was Hinata he called later that night. She hung up on him. He was stunned when his girlfriend broke up with him the next day. His teammates had been laughing from surprise and, a few of them, glee. Some of his teammates found girls arguing entertaining. Hinata and Neji drifted apart.
And still, it was a guaranteed way to get Neji to attend family gatherings with a simple, "Hinata will be there." Sometimes it was true. Neji realized he didn't like his family all that much. Hinata was okay with hers but hung out with her friends as much as she could. Neji had to keep his grades up to stay on the school's soccer team. Hinata, upon discovering she'd been placed in a class that taught public speaking, realized grades were not a priority of hers. She refused to go to a single class, nor gym class. Parent-teacher conferences did nothing to sway her.
"Where do you go during the classes? What do you do?" Neji had been so curious over instant messenger. "Near the woods. Teachers could find us if they cared."
"So you just hang out with your friends?"
"Yeah," she typed herself as shrugging. "They're in choir with me, so it's not like we're smoking. It ruins your voice."
When Hinata had gym and public speaking classes back to back for a semester, she went home early instead. Her parents finally got her to attend by suggesting she go to a performing arts academy for high school, but attending all of her classes was part of it. She didn't get into the one she wanted. Instead, she was accepted into another one that directly trained and recommended high school kids for music conservatories.
Neji attended the local public high school and was convinced he'd never see Hinata again. He'd only seen her perform twice, and didn't really—she was his cousin, and just a normal person. Her singing was fine. What was so great about professional singing? Why did people need so much training for it, and special schools? Neji was going to have a completely different school schedule, not to mention social schedule, than Hinata. He ignored the fact that this had been the case for years. This felt so much worse. So he pretended he didn't care. He pretended he hadn't noticed how pretty she was lately, and how he'd been thinking about her.
Heartbroken at leaving all her friends behind and terrified of starting a new school where she didn't know anyone or how things worked, Hinata brushed off her family's cliché platitudes about making new friends and having fun. Neji stopped responding to her emails and barely looked at her, let alone sat with her when their families got together. She'd tried calling him and left a few voicemails. Nothing. It was out of nowhere. She had no idea what she'd done to piss him off, and he wouldn't talk to her. The first month at her new school, she sent him a few nasty emails. He responded in kind, which infuriated her. "Oh NOW you're answering me? It took me being mean to you?" she emailed. Silence from Neji. Hinata didn't mention it to her new friends when they hung out later.
Sitting at lunch on the first day of school was always terrible. Hinata had been determined not to be nervous, and zoomed instantly to a table that a group of older students had just left. She was instantly approached by an equally nervous girl. Hinata gestured at the empty seats around her and tried to smile. The girl sat down as something occurred to Hinata. She dug in her backpack for a pen and paper and wrote "on vocal rest" in large letters. She wouldn't have to worry about people noticing how she sometimes talked. Wouldn't have to tell them that singing helped, and explain why. Not for awhile, anyway. She waved over a few girls from her math class. The next day, she had talked a little about her family, and mentioned Neji casually. Not how close they had been, or how much she missed him. Definitely not that she had been thinking about him differently. Two years later, she realized she'd never repeated the phrase "Neji, my cousin" often enough for people to remember the connection.
"Are you going home for winter break?" one of her friends asked.
"Yeah. I'm coming back, though." On her first day of school, she had met eight new girls and they'd become fast friends. Two years later, only Hinata remained. It was standard for performing arts schools: you had to keep your grades up and audition each semester in order to stay. If your audition wasn't good enough or your grades slipped, the school kicked you out. Hinata was surprised at how well she'd adapted, and had discovered she was increasingly competitive. Performing arts universities were the same but more intense—only a third of all students graduated from them. Hinata was looking at a few. She was surprised that they didn't emphasize grades as much as she thought they would.
This was where her mind was as she walked to her dorm, and she jumped a little when she saw Neji there. It was a "something is wrong with this picture" moment. "How did you get in here?" she asked curiously. Even as she asked and he responded, she knew. It was key access only for the boarders, but family members could sometimes talk their way in after showing ID and answering pointed questions. Neji would barely have had to say a word. How many times had Hinata, looking for her cousin at crowded events, described him as, "He looks like me but his hair is longer and he's taller"? People always found him fairly quickly based on that. They both had eerily pale bluish eyes, straight black hair that never curled (oh, Hinata had tried), and complexions that suggested the outdoors were uninteresting (Hinata) or the frequent use of sunscreen (Neji).
Both teenagers stood there staring. Hinata didn't seem happy to see Neji at all. "Get your things. I'm taking you home. Your parents didn't tell you?" Hinata narrowed her eyes. "I'm coming back," she informed him. He didn't know what his cousin was referring to or why she was now staring at him so coldly. "You're still here," a relieved voice made them both look over. "We're going home for winter break," Neji explained to a girl who wore all black and gray, including makeup. The way she was studying him reminded him of how he and other sweepers judged each other during soccer: she was sizing him up. Suddenly Neji understood. She thought he was a student here, and Hinata thought her own parents had told her to come home permanently. This was a really competitive school. Of course kids would size each other up before anything else, and anything that sounded vaguely like "you're done here" was threatening. "I go to a public school forty miles away," he emphasized, and Hinata's classmate visibly relaxed. "Hinata's parents are stuck at work, so they asked me to come over."
Hinata did not relax at this, but retreated into her dorm room and reappeared shortly carrying a laptop bag and an overstuffed backpack. "Here's my email." Her classmate handed her a post-it. "Two weeks can be a long time to spend at home." Hinata thanked her, looking a little surprised. Neji was somewhat jealous as they got into the car. "I only have one week left!" Silence. Silence the whole way home, despite Neji occasionally trying to ask questions. He was curious about her school, how she'd been, and made a remark or two that used to piss her off. It should have gotten her to talk, even if she was angry. But nothing. Neji slowed the car to roll down the window and punch in a code. The gates swung forward and Neji carefully drove around the circular driveway and parked. He offered to carry some of Hinata's things and she dutifully handed him the overstuffed backpack, still silent.
Hinata had forgotten to dig out her "on vocal rest" declaration. She didn't know how to explain it to Neji, really, or the nonverbal codes she and her friends used in conversation. Not Morse code. They often pulled out pen and paper if they lost track. Lots of people chattered away to her. A few annoying and disrespectful people pulled faces, asked inappropriate questions, or couldn't keep their hands to themselves. The face pullers, questioners, and handsy people would whine at Hinata for retaliating. She'd push them aside in a move or bump them hard with her shoulder or elbow in passing. She always removed herself from the situation. Now, she was relieved to find out that Neji was as quiet as she was. He asked her a few questions to let her know he wasn't giving her the silent treatment as he had been.
"We're home," Neji called. "We're in here," Hinata's mom called from the kitchen. She served them both mugs of tea after hugging Hinata. The family wasn't demonstrative, but Hinata had been away for awhile. Her dad sat down next to her and squeezed her shoulder. "Put your stuff away first. The ichiju-sansai will be ready in a few minutes." Hinata finished her tea and did so. "How was the drive?" Hinata's father asked. "Long," Neji yawned. "Stay here," Hinata urged, forgetting that she wasn't supposed to be talking. "I don't want you to fall asleep while trying to drive home." She had two weeks before the new semester started. She could go off vocal rest, she decided. Neji was mostly silent as Hinata caught up with her parents over dinner. He couldn't think of much to say, and everything with Hinata was weird. He was glad to slip out of the house the next morning unnoticed. He left a thank-you note and explained he had to be at early scrimmage for soccer. It wasn't until tomorrow, but he wanted to clear his head a little.
Neji turned on his cell phone. "What are you up to?"
"Are you driving?" Sasuke hissed indignantly, and hung up on him before he could answer. When they were fourteen, they had met during a friend's birthday sleepover. They'd exchanged emails and spent as much time together as they could ever since. Neji had been excited to get his driver's license and a car. Sasuke had grown up having a personal driver, and continued to. He hated the idea that someone could get into a car accident talking to him, and assumed every time he called someone, they were driving. Neji got home and called again.
"My cousin's home for winter break."
"The one who goes to the performing arts academy?"Sasuke asked interestedly.
Neji rolled his eyes. "Hinata, who hasn't talked to me in two years, wouldn't talk to me at all last night either, is home." Something occurred to him. "You should meet. The two of you might have a lot in common. Let me call you back." He hung up before Sasuke could say anything.
Hinata greeted Neji with an annoyed, "What?"
"Try to contain yourself," Neji joked. "What are you doing later? I want you to meet my friend Sasuke." A pause. "He won't be interested in you," Neji said carefully.
"What movie are we seeing? And before you ask me, nothing looks good."
Sasuke agreed with this statement, but was more tactful.
"A friend of mine's having a party tonight. We could all go," Neji suggested.
Within fifteen minutes of meeting Sasuke, Hinata asked, "Where have you been all my life?" Sasuke and Neji both smiled at that. "Here," Sasuke supplied. Sasuke had been a child performer in musical theatre since he was eight years old. Neji got the sense that there was no one Sasuke could really talk to about it, but he thought meeting Hinata might help. "You said she was shy," Sasuke later commented. "Usually she is," Neji explained a little defensively. "This, from the guy who hasn't talked to her in two years."
Hinata and Neji were talking again. He'd missed her, but wouldn't admit to how much. A week later, she asked if he wanted to come over. "My parents are out until tomorrow. I rented an artistic—"
"Arthouse," Neji corrected her, more out of habit than anything. "I rented a weird movie," Hinata continued, "and you can explain it to me." The movie turned out to be more boring than weird, and Neji couldn't explain it to Hinata anyway. There had been a sex scene between two characters who, up until then, had barely noticed each other and were both involved with other people. Neji spent the whole rest of the thankfully short movie hoping Hinata wouldn't look over or brush against him. The scene, stupid as it was as part of the story, was well done from a cinematography standpoint, the lighting was great, and Neji would probably think about it for awhile.
"Do you watch stuff like that a lot?" he ventured when the movie was over. They both knew what he was referring to.
"No, I read it."
"Like in books?"
"No, on my computer." Hinata hesitated. "I could send you links to better stuff than we just saw."
"I'd like that a lot." They looked at each other a moment, then firmly away, then back again. "Did you rent any other movies?"
She had, a foreign horror film with excellent subtitles that nonetheless terrified her so much that she made Neji turn it off after half an hour. Hinata had mistaken it for an entirely different movie and was embarrassed as well as terrified. She refused to let Neji leave her alone and insisted he sleep beside her. Her speech impediment, she discovered, was back. She was distraught. Neji hugged her instantly and asked where her parents kept the booze.
Hinata pushed a kitchen chair against the counter and walked over to the cabinet. Neji took the bottle of bourbon Hinata handed him and was still processing the fact that his cousin had walked barefoot on the counter as she climbed down and wiped the counter clean. "I forgot how short you are. Or how big the kitchen is." Hinata didn't say anything, just poured bourbon into a coffee mug and drank until her hands stopped shaking. "Help yourself." She gestured to the bottle. Neji just stared at her for a second. He poured some bourbon into a normal glass and tried not to grimace. He really didn't drink much. He did drink what he'd poured, though. "I'll put it away," he offered. He had to stand on his toes to put the bottle back. Hinata washed, dried, and put away their cups. "So…you've been doing this for awhile," Neji noted. Silence. The booze hit pretty quickly, and he hadn't even drunk half of what Hinata had downed so easily. Hinata steered him by the elbow into her bedroom.
That night, they slept back-to-back in loose cotton pajamas with the lights on.