Chapter Five
I Continue This Waste of my Time, Oops I Mean Quest
The next morning after I woke and set off again with Epona, I reflected on the previous night's dream or whatever it was. I pulled out my journal and wrote down what I could remember.
I had a strange vision last night, I was by the same cave from before. But this time it was alive with activity even from outside of it. Someone apparently escaped this group's hideout causing quite the disruption. They made it outside, hid from view and got away completely. The three who seem to be in charge of these people working for evil spoke amongst each other. The cloaked man or prophet of doom, the tall man who is apparently named Sooga, and the fat one whose name I don't know…or do I? He seems…familiar somehow. I thought these people were working for Ganon but the being who showed up at the end of my vision didn't feel like Ganon, it felt like that presence at the shore.
The unknown individual actually said something particularly strange, he said that he used to be a part of the man who ran away and that he still managed to keep the power that shouldn't have stayed with him. The escaped man's appearance also strikes a chord with me, I know I have seen him before. Wait a minute, olive skin and red hair? Only one individual I've ever met in any of my lifetimes fits that description. It could only be Ganondorf, but that doesn't make any sense, he's the king of evil. For him to flee from exactly that is almost beyond comprehension.
Though as I think about it now, I can't help but remember something in the old legends about Ganondorf. He was not the original evil, rather he was a reincarnation of an ancient demon king. A demon whose skin was gray, and had fire for hair. Zelda and I have suspected the return of this being for five years but we've not dared even think his name. Indeed, in addition to Ganondorf, the demon king is returning as well.
Why though, would Ganondorf be fleeing? Yes, he is the reincarnation of the evil, but he was evil to begin with, right? Or is it just possible that maybe it was never actually him? Could the evil that he exuded have been the piece of the entity that he reincarnated from? Could Ganondorf have somehow been separated from the most malevolent thing that's ever existed? Is that even possible?
Having finished the entry, I put the journal away. I flew for hours and hours, Epona huffing as she flapped. Having so much time on my hands, my thoughts returned to my vision. I had the feeling, along with the first one from before had a feeling like they hadn't occurred yet. I knew not by how much, how long it would be before they did happen, I just knew that they hadn't occurred yet.
I suddenly felt a little sick when I thought of my Zelda, if the prophecy was about to come true in however long it would be, would our safety even be assured? What if it wasn't? This was a horrible feeling to be sure, to be only a seventeen year old, albeit one with the mind of a much older person, contemplating my own mortality. If I was to die by this cursed prophecy, what would be my deepest regret?
My answer came instantly, yes, I knew what my biggest regret would be. I wondered if she had the same one. My regret would be not accomplishing what I had thought before, the realization that what I desired wasn't so out of reach. If I was to die before my time, I wanted that wish more than anything.
The days wore on as Epona and I made our way along, getting closer and closer to the goal. As the days slowly crawled by, I repeatedly cursed fate for making me be away from Zelda for this long. It had felt like an eternity since I last saw her. It was summer! I wasn't supposed to be kept away from her at this time of year! It was with this thought, that a thought from a few days before resurfaced in my mind. Pulling out my journal again, I wrote out my thoughts.
It was difficult to put this into words, I was initially unsure as to how to describe it even to myself. But now I can keep it to myself no longer. I ask myself repeatedly, how much more of this can I take? How many more times of being separated from Zelda must I bear? Goddesses it hurts so much, I feel like my soul is being ripped to pieces whenever we are drawn apart. It's a pain I have felt at the end of every summer since we reunited in this life, but with each summer it has grown stronger and harder to ignore.
Last year, I almost couldn't leave at all, I felt that if I did leave I would literally tear apart. Zelda, I know in my heart, has felt the same all along. Each year that goes by, she's sadder and sadder at the end of the summer season here. Last year, she was barely holding back tears as she held me tightly. Neither of us spoke, not able to get words around the lumps in our throats. If it was that bad last year, what of this year? Is it possible to die from grief and sadness alone?
I certainly feel like it might be, if right now is any indication. It hurts so much in my heart even just thinking of the notion of leaving her again. Goddess, I don't know if can take this anymore, my strength to trust in your plan and my patience is quickly running thin. I feel as though I am going insane right now, I don't ever want to leave her again. I am trying to think of ways to avoid that fate, but try as I might only one way comes to mind. But I hesitate, I desire it yes, but what about my Zelda? Yes, I know she does at some point, but would she sooner? I need to know if she shares my opinion on what would be her greatest regret if she were to die by the prophecy.
Her answer to that question will ultimately decide the answer to my own question. I must ask her as soon as possible. As soon as I can get a rainbow, I will message her, and ask her. I MUST know! I can't take this anymore. I need to know! I need her! This separation from her has shown me just how much she means to me! I have to let her know this too, she deserves to know how important she is to my state of mind. I feel like I'm losing my mind with her away from my side.
I set up camp that evening, ultimately deciding that it would actually probably be best to wait until after I had finished this terrible task. I slept restlessly that night, the brief periods I was sleeping, she walked through my thoughts.
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I was standing on the shore by camp, Zelda was at my side. I smiled at her, getting one in return. I asked her quietly, "Zelda…if you-if we were to die by the prophecy, what would be your deepest regret?"
She looked at me, her face taking on a look of contemplation and sadness. She responded quietly, almost inaudibly, "My biggest regret would be being unable to get to be with you for the rest our lives and beyond."
"I feel the same way." I said, my voice thick with emotion.
As she snapped her gaze up to mine, I was suddenly aware that this didn't feel like a dream.
"Zelda, what-what's going on here? I thought I was dreaming! But now I'm not sure!" I said suddenly shocked.
"I thought the same, but we're apparently sharing this. So…you really-you really feel that way? You really mean that?" She asked me her voice full of hope.
"Every word, every single one, love." My voice cracked.
"How do we negotiate that with the prophecy?" Zelda asked.
"I will…think on the matter, love. Just give me some time." I pleaded.
"Of course, my love." She leaned in before everything faded to black.
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I jerked awake, Epona huffed quietly nearby. I fed her some apples I had and we set off again. We traveled for another few days, finally reaching our destination in the wilderness of North Dakota, around afternoon on the day just a week before the end of June. I had about a week to get back to camp before the fourth of July. The idea of me missing that was incomprehensible to me. This was due to me becoming more and more certain by the day that I had to put the plan my mind was urging me for into motion. And for that I would need to be able to be back at camp before the fourth.
Upon arriving at the destination, I was so shocked I fell onto my knees on the ground. The cave was there alright, but it was simply a normal cave, I just knew that somehow. Apparently, the point at which it became a hotbed of evil was still not yet, the gods were wrong, if that was even possible. They must have sensed it from the future. I put my face in my hands and screamed in frustration, my jaw clenching so hard my teeth ached, but I didn't care at the moment.
I had come here, to this goddess forsaken place in the middle of nowhere, for nothing! All those days, this whole week, all of it wasted! A whole week of my life that could have been spent with the girl of my absolute dreams that I will now never get back! The frustration was boiling in me, why did this have to happen to me? Why was life so unfair?! Was it not enough that I already felt like I was being ripped apart every day I was away from my Zelda? Evidently not! I couldn't believe that this whole quest was a nothing!
I shot to my feet, my anger and frustration lighting my nerves on fire, I let out a loud and angry wordless yell of pure rage at this insult. I grabbed the Sheikah slate and was about to pull out a bomb rune when my logic caught up with me. What was I doing? This wasn't like me, I was angry yes, but did that justify almost taking a bomb to the area? I put the slate away again and rubbed my face with both hands, trying to quell my rage at this indignity. I started stomping my way back to Epona, I was done here, I was going back home. In my residual anger, I didn't even consider the magnitude that I'd thought of Camp Half-Blood at the thought of home, not my house in Oregon.
"Master, I would advise you to calm down. You are not thinking rationally at the moment, take a few seconds to relax." Fi said, appearing in front of me.
I knew it wasn't in any way her fault, what she said was absolutely true, but hearing the words annoyed me, after all telling someone who's frustrated to calm down doesn't usually work. "Calm down? I'm not thinking rationally? You have no idea what I'm feeling right now!" I snapped, then continued, "I didn't want to come on this quest to begin with, and now I found out it was all for nothing!" I raged, breathing heavily as I broke off.
Fi just hovered there, looking back at me. She didn't look upset, not having emotions. But somehow her just impassively looking back at me made me feel guilty and ashamed. "I'm sorry Fi, I shouldn't have gotten upset at you, it wasn't your fault." She nodded, saying "You need not apologize, Master, I have no feelings to hurt." "No, but I still need to apologize for my behavior, you didn't deserve it." I answer, and Fi nods a second time and disappears.
I sighed, trying to eliminate the lingering frustration, and was just about to get on Epona again, when a voice stopped me, "Peace, my child."
I snapped my head toward the sound, and saw Athena standing there, looking at me with pity.
"How can you say that? Do you have any idea what I'm going through at the moment? Do you have any idea how much pain I'm in right now?" I snapped at her, still tingling with irritation from the unfairness of everything.
She sighed and shook her head before speaking up in a calm tone, "Yes, my child I do. If I could ease the feeling you hold, I would my son, but I can't."
I fell to my hands and knees in front of her, my voice desperate as I spoke, "Please, mother, tell me what I should do! I need your guidance and wisdom. I feel so conflicted, my mind tells me one thing, my heart tells me another. I don't know which one I should listen to." I paused, and then continued, "I know you immortals can't tell mortals everything, but I beg of you! Please tell me mother, what must I do?"
"My son, I cannot tell you, not because I won't but because I do not know what to tell you." Her voice sounded sad, like she truly regretted it.
"Then is there any hope for me?" I despaired, feeling like the world was going completely dark and devoid of joy. "I can't take another nine months apart from her! She is my entire reason for living! She's everything to me! I feel so much agony merely at the thought of leaving her again! Is there anything you can tell me?" I pleaded.
"You have revealed plainly the level of your devotion to your Zelda. To feel like you have no choice but to lose hope, you have proven that you would do anything for her." My mother replied, "Which is why you have proven yourself truly worthy of my blessing, and the other gods stand behind me on this. Which is why I'm telling you this personally, rather than having one of the others pass on a message."
"Your blessing?" I asked, voice suddenly faint as I looked up at her in shock and budding hope, did she mean…?
"Yes, that's exactly what I mean. Apollo has given his as well, and as your mother I can wish for nothing more than your happiness." She continued.
"Thank you, mother." I said brokenly, getting to my feet, "That means a lot."
"Now go, my son, return to your Zelda. You know what you must do." Athena said, starting to fade, a warm and motherly smile on her face. "Follow your heart, that much wisdom I can share with you."
Indeed, I did, I got back on Epona, and we made for Camp Half-Blood as fast as we could. We got back just after noon on the thirtieth of June. When I next saw Zelda, she hugged me so tightly, I almost thought my ribs would snap. I didn't even care, all that mattered was the fact that I was with her again. That was one of the thoughts in my head as I hugged her back almost as tightly. The other thought was that not only did I not care about the tight hug, but in my heart, I knew that this time I was never leaving her again.
Author's note: Well, I'm sure some of you at least can see where this is going. And for the love of the goddesses please leave reviews so I know people are reading this and its not just going out into the void!