Thank you for the ongoing support! Hope you enjoy this update on Hanna :) aaaand don't kill me for the ending haha
14.
She's tired. Everything hurts. It seems like her body weighs a tonne. For a moment she thinks A must have drugged them again but this feels different. Perhaps another punishment. But there's a steady beeping coming from somewhere and she uses that to try to ground herself, to not let the panic overwhelm her. She can smell something that doesn't fit. Something sterile. The kind of smell used to cover up something, blood or vomit or… hang on, don't chemicals burn sometimes too? That must be it. That fits with this A's style. They're already bloody and bruised and blistered to prove it. But it's a different kind of pain that she has this time, an all over ache. And that means she's not the target. And if she's not the target, then that means… Caleb. She opens her eyes.
The room is white and clinical. She's on a bed in the middle of the room. There are wires all over her, crisscrossing, and the beeping she could hear is one of the machines they're attached to. Standing over her are two strangers. Going by their uniform, they could be doctors or nurses. But this could also be another of A's tricks, and so when one leans over her to make an adjustment to her IV bag, she flinches violently.
But then, on her other side, a figure moves into view. Someone that can help her. Someone whose presence means they must have got out.
"Mom?" she tries to say. No sound escapes.
"I'm here, darling."
Her mom reaches across to take her hand on the far side of the bed and Hanna realises it's because the hand nearest to her, the one hurt in A's attack, is now swathed in bandages. Her mom starts to stroke her hair and as Hanna relaxes into it, she feels a lone tear trickle down her cheek.
"Mom?" she manages a croak this time but it hurts her throat.
"Hanna? I'm Doctor Lowell."
With great effort, she manages to roll her head to face the man speaking to her.
"You're not going to be able to talk very well just for now," he explains. "We had to insert a tube down your throat to help you with breathing for a while. That's why it's so sore."
Through the fog of tiredness she doesn't quite understand, but it sounds scary. It sounds like another of A's games. She tries to think back, to the last thing she remembers but she doesn't get much further than a memory of Caleb taking her into his arms. She looks back at her mom.
"Caleb?"
"He's okay," her mom tells her. "I've seen him. He's in the hospital too but he's okay. It's you who had us all scared."
"I'm sorry."
"Hush." Her mom kisses the top of her head and then resumes stroking her hair. "You need to rest now, sweetheart."
The pull of tiredness is making every bit of her body ache, but it doesn't feel right resting when Caleb's not with her. They look after each other now, that was their promise. Weakly, she starts to cry.
"It's okay, I'm right here, Hanna. I'm going nowhere." Her mom gives her a watery smile. "Jordan will be here soon too. In the next day or so."
She frowns. That's one thing too many to have to think about now. "Tell him not to," she whispers.
"What, why?"
"Don't want him."
"Hanna?"
She notices her mom's eyes flicker to her arm where the sleeve of her hospital gown has risen. She looks and sees the fingerprint bruises her mom is looking at.
She knows what her mom is thinking. She not sure if the bruises are from the man that grabbed her or from Caleb trying to save her from him but whoever it was, it has no bearing on her not wanting to see Jordan.
She pulls the sleeve down to cover them up. It feels like the movement has taken all of her energy.
"Sweetheart, whatever you want, or don't want, is fine with me, okay."
She tries to smile but she's not sure if it makes it as far as her face. She's so tired even her eyelids feel heavy. "Want… Caleb," she says, as her eyes flicker shut.
When she wakes, she can't tell if it's hours or days later. They've moved her now, out of the intensive care unit and onto a private room, which should be reassuring but going to sleep in one place and waking up another with no recollection of how, is bringing back unwelcome memories.
She's got no idea how they got out and that's enough of a concern in itself, but also, she can't stop thinking of the last time Caleb was taken from her while she slept.
A doctor appears. He smiles at her and asks her about her pain levels, then gives her something for the ache in her head and her hand and her throat.
Again, she doesn't remember falling asleep, but this time it's the clatter of a door opening that wakes her. She opens her eyes in panic, but when she sees the figure manoeuvring through the doorway, warmth seeps through her chest instead.
He's on crutches, looking slightly wobbly, and even though he's in his own t-shirt and joggers, the hospital band around his wrist tells her he's not been discharged yet.
He smiles at her. "Hey."
"Hey," she says back. She still can't manage much more than a whisper.
He clumsily makes his way to her and sits on the bed, facing her. "We made it out."
"We did."
Her eyes flicker to the bruising on his forehead and she can see he's doing the same with her, checking on each other's injuries just like they'd become accustomed to doing.
"How long's it been?" she asks.
"Three, four days," he says, with a shrug. "I've lost track. All I know is I've missed you." He's giving her that look that always makes her melt. "How are you?"
"Okay."
"And the honest answer?"
She considers. "Weirded out. I mean, I have this massive hole in my memory about how we got here." The bit of voice she's recovered is already beginning to fade.
"The cops found us, pulled us out," he says.
"You remember?"
"Not really. I've got this vague recollection of Toby shouting at me to wake up but he's trying to convince me I was hallucinating."
She smiles but Caleb doesn't.
"Han, has anyone told you? About where we were?"
She shakes her head.
"You were right," he says. "It was the same building as the dollhouse."
It shouldn't come as a shock but from the way her heart jumps into her throat, it seems her body didn't get the memo. She can feel Caleb watching her, waiting to offer comfort if she starts to cry.
"No, no-one told me," she says, frowning. Her mom hadn't given any indication. "Hang on, what does that even mean?"
"I don't know. There was no-one else there when the cops arrived. It seems A turned on the gas and then did a runner."
"And left us to die."
"Yeah." He shakes his head. "Sorry, perhaps I shouldn't have said-"
"No! You should! I don't want people treating me like I'm about to break." Her hand comes to her throat, her voice painful now as well as silent. "Or already broken."
"You're not broken, babe. Far from it. You're the strongest, bravest person I know. Your mom's just worried about you. I am too." A muscle in his jaw twitches. "When you passed out on me… I didn't even know it was possible to be that scared."
"Bet you I've been scareder."
"Oh yeah?"
"You in the pool."
Their eyes say more than a verbal reply could. They were both more scared of losing the other, than of anything happening to themselves.
"Can I have a hug?" she asks.
"Of course."
He shuffles closer and gently helps her off the pillows, taking her in his arms and scooping her against his chest. She wraps her arms around him and rests her head on his shoulder, breathing him in.
She's never felt safer than when she's in his arms. It's not completely comfortable as she suspects his hold is largely what's keeping her upright, but there's nowhere else she'd rather be. His hands gently rub up and down her back and she thinks she could stay like this forever. But the door opens again and Caleb lowers her back against the pillow so they can see their visitor.
"It's just me," her mom says. She looks at Caleb. "I thought I'd find you here. I've just heard a poor nurse getting shouted at for letting you have those crutches."
"What do you mean?" Hanna asks.
"I'm not exactly meant to be here," he says with a grin.
"He's been trying to escape for days."
Something inside her snaps. "Why shouldn't he? Don't they realise we've been locked up for the last week? They can't do the same to us!" It's hard to sound as mad as she wants when she can only whisper.
"I understand that," her mom says. "But they want both of you on bed rest."
"Why?"
"Hanna, why do you think? You've been injured, starved, gassed… both of you. Do you want me to go on?"
She rolls her eyes. "Well, here's a bed. And we're resting on it."
"They just want what's best for you," her mom says, softly.
"Being with Caleb is what's best for me!"
Caleb shifts uncomfortably. "Just five more minutes, then I'll go?" he says to her mom.
Her mom sighs and folds her arms across her chest but eventually gives a nod. "Fine. Five minutes. I'll wait outside and distract them."
Not for the first time, Hanna's glad her mom likes Caleb so much, especially when the five minutes turns into ten. Eventually a nurse insists on taking him back to his bed, in a wheelchair, much to Caleb's irritation.
As the next day arrives, her thoughts are filled with Caleb and only Caleb. When the door opens, her heart leaps, hoping it's him. Instead, she sees Spencer, Aria and Emily, clustered together, all trying to get through the door at the same time. It's Spencer who reaches her first to pull her into a hug but when she bursts into sudden, unexpected tears, the other two join in too, giving her an embrace that she's sure is far more detrimental to any of her injuries than Caleb's presence.
She wants to ask if any of them know anything about how he's doing or when he'll be able to come back and see her, but she knows Spencer will see through her straight away. She can't let her friend find out that way. She's tries to take an interest in the chocolates and the fashion magazines they've brought with them but it's almost impossible to think of anything but him.
Aside from the time when A ripped him from her, they'd been together for days. Each other's lifelines. They'd kissed. He told her he loved her. She'd never stopped loving him. And now, here she is, in the hospital, safe, and she'd rather be anywhere else if it means she gets to be with Caleb.
Eventually she gets the visitor she was looking forward to the most. He looks a little steadier on the crutches now.
"Hey."
"Hi."
"You'll be pleased to know I'm here legally this time."
"How'd you wangle that, give one of the nurses a free upgrade on their phone?"
He grins. "Maybe."
When he opts to sit on the mattress again rather than the visitors chair, she can't help but feel pleased.
"You look better than last time I saw you," he says.
"You don't." The bruising on his face is beginning to turn green now, giving his cheek bone and forehead a strange hue.
"I'm fine. Better than fine actually, I'm getting out today."
Her bones suddenly feel weak. It's good news his health has improved and she's pleased for him that he'll be free of the hospital, but she's not sure she can cope with him being any further away than down the corridor.
"Great," she says as enthusiastically as she can. "Let out early for good behaviour?"
"More like they've had enough of me constantly asking to see you."
Her heart does something funny that she hopes doesn't translate onto her face. "So," she says, as cover, "what's the first thing you're going to do once you're out of here?"
"Well, I couldn't decide if I wanted pizza delivery or Thai, and then I decided both." He grins. "I'll bring you the leftovers. Cold, just the way you like them."
"You're actually pretending there's going to be leftovers?"
"Fair point." He chuckles. "Maybe I'll just buy your own when you get outta here instead. They told you when that will be?"
"No." She rolls her eyes. "They won't let me out the bed, never mind the hospital! I'll hold you to the takeout though."
"Deal."
Their eyes meet, just as he's mid-grin, and their gazes lock. There's an intensity in his eyes that she knows is mirrored in her own. So far, they've not spoken about the ways their relationship developed in there, but she can feel it in every action and every look that passes between them. If possible, it feels like she loves him more than ever. The smile has fallen from his lips and they're now slightly parted, and it's easy for her to imagine he's asking for permission to kiss her. She wants to tell him to do it but doesn't quite dare.
"I'm really glad you're getting out," she says instead, and finds she means it that time.
"Thanks."
Their eyes are still searching each other's for answers. She wants it to be him who acknowledges their feelings for each other first, but she doesn't know if her patience will last much longer.
She jumps as the door opens. Spencer lurks in the doorway, a big bag over one shoulder.
"Hi Han," Spencer says. She looks at Caleb. "Ready to get back to ours?"
The words hit her. It's a million times worse than when she'd first found out about Spencer and Caleb because back then she was still pretending to herself she was over him. She swallows down the lump in her throat and tries not to react. She can feel Caleb's eyes on her, willing her to look at him, but she refuses. If she looks at him she knows, with certainty, that she'll cry. After everything, he's going back to Spencer. And she can't even own this heartbreak, because she gave them her blessing.