Sorry for disappearing and not updating this story for awhile. I have been busy lately and haven't had a chance to update here. I will make an effort over the next few days to update chapters. Thanks for reading so far if you have. Please read and review, I'd like to hear your thoughts.
Chapter Ten: When Something Cries…
"Under the darkness, pierced by the feelings that run through me,
I don't need any regret. I'll destroy my fate now."
~ Under the Darkness by C. G Mix
I woke up in a daze. It took me a few minutes to realize I was in my father's room. My mother was lying down beside me, holding me. She must have come into the room when I was asleep. As the world of the waking began to filter into my eyes, memories of last night's events flashed before my eyes like a tape that was being fast-forwarded. I sat up as if a bolt of lightning had reanimated me back to life. Mother's teal eyes shot open in shock, realizing that I had just awakened. I was panting as if I was out of breath despite the fact I had just woke up a few moments ago. My mother wrapped an arm around me.
"Rika, a lot has happened. Please do not do anything rash," she pleaded with me. I sighed impatiently, if only she understood…maybe she did to an extent, I did not know and for the moment, I did not care.
"Mom, I just witness somebody I love nearly gank his brother whom I'm also madly in love with. I doubt you can comprehend my pain right now," I retorted in a cold voice. She seemed slightly hurt by my tone but pressed on.
"Rika, I have lost people I loved too. I may not have seen them die over and over again as you have claimed. That does not mean that my pain is any less valid than yours. Dum is still alive and thanks to your quick thinking too. I am sorry about you having to experience that trauma last night. I also heard about what you had done to get yourselves out of that situation. I do not blame you for your actions. Blood and Elliot are doing everything they can to figure out who is responsible for this fringe group. Please Rika, do not do anything rash. I am begging you as your mother to take a deep breath and take a step back for a moment. I say this because I care and because I love you," she said in a firm but caring voice. I realized she was right. I apologized for acting cold. She only embraced me in a hug.
"I don't want to see anything happen to you. Neither does your father, Dee, or your uncle. We love you, Rika," she added with a small smile. My blood ran cold at the mention of Dee's name. I was still angry at him for what he had done. I temporarily shoved that off to the side as I hugged my mother back. Suddenly, I buried my face into her chest and the emotions I had held back had come bursting out of me and drowned me in a series of harsh sobs. She released a small gasp of surprise but her hold on me tightened and her hand began petting my head to try to comfort me. I clutched her pinafore tightly as my body was attacked by these gut-wrenching sobs, tears drowning my face with their salty waterfalls.
"Rika, shh, it's ok honey, I promise," she whispered over and over to try to comfort me. She sat there with me in her lap, rocking back and forth as if she was comforting a newborn. However, I was eighteen and here I was, clinging to my adopted mother like a child because my emotions decided to break free and drown me with their sorrows. I guess I had been holding in a lot of shit as I still could not let go of her. As if reading my mind, my mom said, "You do not have to be ashamed about allowing yourself a good cry. Nor do you have to be ashamed about clinging to me when your heart has just been through hell. If I was dealing with that pain too, I'd be hugging my mother too. Its ok let it out. That's what I'm here for."
Her words hit me like arrows in the chest, not that they were painful but comforting. Fresh sobs broke out from my chest as my body shook from crying. She kept rocking back and forth while holding onto me, allowing me to release my emotions without any questions asked. After a while of her holding me and once I felt free from my tears, I sat up and looked at her. Nothing but kindness and love swam in her teal eyes, taking the end of her pinafore and dabbing it under my eyes, drying up leftover tears. Her left hand was still on the small of my back, hugging me close to her. "Do you feel a little better now?" she asked me after a pause. I nodded, too exhausted and my brain was too muddled for words for the time being.
"Good, now let's go get you cleaned up. A new day waits," she replied as she guided me gently toward the bathroom. I protested, however she stubbornly insisted that she needed to help me. I sighed and just allowed her to help me. She stripped me of my bloody and torn dress, quickly throwing it aside, and turned on the water….she had helped me wash my body and get it clean, even after insisting once more I could do it myself, she still did not accept my answer. Once that was done, she helped me dry off and helped me dress. She picked out one of her simple blue dresses with the rings on the skirt and sleeves, putting it on over my head, and tying the white ribbon in the back.
"There, that's better. I still can't believe how fast you've grown up," she muses as she sat me down on a stool and brushed my hair gently with a brush, not pulling when she came across a tangle and gently worked them out. She hummed while she brushed through my long curtain of long indigo colored hair. I hated to admit it but I found her caring for me like this comforting, especially after what I had been through the past few days. While I sat there and allowed her to continue brushing through my hair, I caught brief glimpse of Dum's thoughts. He was bored, lonely, and angry at his brother.
I talked back to him in my mind, saying he had every right to be angry with Dee. I also was angry with Dee for what he did to Dum. "Had Dee even come to see you yet to apologize?" I asked him inside my mind. He replied and said that Dee had not come to apologize. Anger was made quite clear in his mental voice. I sighed, I told him I would be there as soon as I could and that I'd keep him company for a while.
"Thanks sis, I'd like that," he replied inside my mind, a little happiness colored his words. I could almost see the small smile on his face as he thought these words. I smiled slightly thinking about this. I bet he looked adorable too. I felt like a school girl as a blush bloomed across my face. My mother stopped humming and quirked an eyebrow.
"Rika, are you alright dear?" she asked me.
"Yes mom, I'm alright," I assured her.
She hummed and resumed brushing my hair, working out some more snags gently with the brush. With aid from the brush, she gathered the strands into her hand and tied my hair back with a ribbon. "There, now your hair is mostly out of your face," she declared with a small smile. I appreciated my mom helping me feel better. I turned around, standing up from my seat and hugged her. She let out a small surprised sound but wrapped her arms around me, hugging me back. "You're welcome, just trying to help my daughter feel better," she added. She kissed the top of my head before releasing me. "Go and see Dum, I'm sure he'd like some company," she said as if she could read my mind. I nodded, saying I planned on doing that anyways….
I disappeared from mother and father's room in a cloud of golden butterflies, reappearing in front of Dum in our infirmary. A smile graced his face when he saw me. I smiled back and hugged him gently in case he was still hurting from his bullet wound. "It is ok, sis. I am feeling better thanks to the doctor's help," he reassured me with another smile. I tightened my hug around his waist, his arms wrapped around me in return, hugging me back. He sat up on the bed, scooted over and motioned for me to sit next to him which I did.
"I have been bored off my ass in here. I try to tell the doctor that I am ok and that I will be fully healed within one more time change. However, he insists I stay here for that time period to make sure that I rest adequately," he said, rolling his red eyes. He made no mention of Dee as he spoke; his thoughts also contained no mention of his brother either. However, given the circumstances being what they were, I did not blame him. Out of respect for Dum, I did my best to keep my thoughts free of him as well.
I talked about the book which I summoned and decided to read to him to help relieve his boredom. He wrapped an arm around me as I read aloud to him, looking up at him every so often and seeing some joy being reflected in his dazzling ruby red eyes. I snuggled into his chest as I continued reading to him. After a while, he insisted that he wanted to read to me so I passed the book to him and allowed him to read aloud as well. He was reading about the part where Battler was trying to reassess Beatrice's moves from the prior games. The game had been hijacked by the witches Lambdadelta and….Bernkastel. There was that name again…a constant reminder of the witch I was becoming and already was. I let that thought slip right on by as I paid attention to his words and his voice as he read. I sighed in contentment, snuggling into his side. I felt my eyelids drooping as he continued, he noticed and stopped and put the book aside and pulled me close to him and I napped against his chest.
While I slept, Nightmare decided to visit me. "It has been awhile, Sir Nightmare," I greeted him politely. "I apologize for skipping the last meeting," I apologized to him. He only smoked a drag off his pipe, thinking for a moment before he spoke.
"It is understandable that the Twins' bad habits have rubbed off on you, Lady Rika. However, I assure you three would have been much safer attending the meeting…those stupid rouges would not have dared to attack you when you were surrounded by fellow Roleholders," he said in his deep voice. When he put it that way, I realized he was right. "Of course I am right. However, given the circumstances, I must say you did an exemplary job defending yourself as you fought alongside your twin lovers. It is regrettable that Dee was coerced into shooting Dum. However, you let them know they fucked up," he had continued, pausing to smoke his pipe, blowing smoke rings into the dreamscape.
Anger bit at me at the mention of Dee shooting Dum and damn near killing his own twin brother. I growled at the mention of Dee's name. "It seems you are becoming more vindictive as time goes by. It is only natural I suppose. That was her nature, heartlessness, ruthlessness, and cruelty served her best," he said as if reading my thoughts and emotions. My eyes widened, I am nothing like her….
"Correction, she IS YOU my dear. I understand that you were reading that book to Dum, yes? She is the witch in that book along with Lambda who hijacks Battler and Beatrice's game. While you are taking on a different form of her magic, you are still connected to her. I would not be surprised if you become Bernkastel. Well, YOU ARE Bernkastel," he muses….what was he playing at? "I play at nothing dear. You are Fredrica Bernkastel, that is an absolute truth," he tells me, reading my thoughts like he does. I paced back and forth, trying to fully understand the red truth he had spoken. He had told me this before, the Joker I called Red also told me this a long time ago as well. Maybe I did understand more than I thought….
I changed tactics; I wondered who was behind the Yellow Ties. "An outsider from your world controls the Yellow Tie faction. They are after Rika Furude because their leader wishes to settle the score for what she has done to her, according to her selfish whims. She will stop at nothing to destroy everything that is dear to you," he replies to my thoughts. A "she?" Who the hell could that be? She was from MY World? Oh no….OH NO….IT couldn't be…could it?
"Correct, the outsider was sent here by a witch that calls herself "Eua." However, she failed to mention to this outsider that her looping powers would not work. I wonder if she left it out on purpose. Perhaps, I don't quite frankly give a damn," he said once again. Eua, who the fuck was Eua? This made no damn sense….his second red truth sent my mind into a world of chaos of wild thoughts. "Take a deep breath, you have people around you who will help," he assured me. I did my best to take deep breaths. I had allowed my mind to do most of the talking. I had a feeling I knew who the leader was. However, I had to confirm it with father.
"Alas, this is all we have time for. We will chat again soon," said Nightmare as he faded away and left me alone in the dreamscape. I tried to ask more questions but the space faded and I was pulled back into the realm of the waking….
Dum had shaken me awake…concern colored his red eyes as I began to slowly open mine and my purple ones met his. "Sis, are you alright? It seemed like you were having a nightmare," he said. His words seemed too astute more than they should have been. Well I was speaking with Nightmare and he had told me some shocking information about the rogues that had attacked us a few time periods ago. "What, what did he say?" he asked me more urgently. I closed my eyes, sighing; my eyes and mind were still somewhat foggy from sleep. Dum, please give me a moment. He nodded and allowed me to wake up for a few moments before speaking. Without holding anything back, I told him what I had learned…
"WHAT, you're the witch from the BOOK?! Also the outsider leading the Yellow Ties is from your world?! What could she possibly want?" he asked, his eyes widened with shock. I recoiled slightly when he realized that I was the witch from the book.
"Not exactly Dum. Well, I suppose I am…however I don't have my full powers," I told him.
"Even if you are that witch named Bern, you're still my sis," he replied, hugging me tightly to his chest protectively. I did not realize how much I needed his hug. I wrapped my arms around him tightly. Maybe it was time to try to speak with Dee? I could not allow this to fester any longer…Dum released me briefly with a cold look in his eyes as he looked at me. "I have nothing to say to him. He tried to take me from you," he said, replying to my thoughts. I realized he was correct. However, the bad feeling came back like a stone sinking deep into my stomach…
A red light glowed from the darkness and out from the portal came a certain shorthaired blonde girl with glowing red eyes. I knew her all too well. She grinned evilly at me and spoke with menacing words, "At last we meet in this world, my dear traitorous Rika. If only you would have just stayed with me in our Hinamizawa, then none of this would have to happen….but alas, here we are." I stared at her with disbelief and anger as I stood protectively in front of Dum's bed.
"What are you saying, my dear bitch Satoko? Here to cause more misery for me? As if fucking throwing me back into the hellish Hinamizawas of June 1983 wasn't enough for you. Here you are sending fucking hordes of rogue faceless after me to try to kill me! What the fuck do you want!? Do you want me to join you in this fucking "ideal Hinamizawa" of yours or do you want to kill me? You can't have it both ways, motherfucker!" I spat out angrily, my own eyes glowing red as I confronted her. She merely laughed coldly at my words.
"Oh my dear Rika, if only you'd come back with me. Then your boyfriend here would not have to die. It's a pity really, he seems handsome," she replied, a knife raised in her hand. "And after he was just about to recover from his wound given to him by his dear brother. Really, it is indeed a pity…however…it can't be helped," she added with a nonchalant shrug.
"What the fuck are you talking about?!" shouted Dum from behind me.
"Nothing that concerns you, my dear boy, just how to go about your death," replied Satoko with a cold indifference, her evil smirk widening…I stood protectively in front of Dum. She would not kill him! Not while I was here!
"You've already destroyed everything near and dear to me, Satoko. I'm not letting you take him away from me too!" I shouted. "You're going to have to go through me!" I challenged, glaring her down.
"Oh I planned on it…however our choice of battle shall not be in this pathetic room. Can't have your parents or his brother intervening now can we…hmm let me think…." She replies as if pretending on how to settle things. With a snap of her fingers, Dum, Satoko and I appeared on a floating platform set adrift in the Sea of Fragments. My eyes widened, no…not here….anywhere but here. Dum also looked around, he was wearing his black and gray pinstriped suit, and his halberd appeared in his hand.
"Figured I'd give you two a fair shot, it's the least I can do. Now, let's begin," said Satoko coldly as she summoned a long sword with a blade as dark as freshly spilt blood. I summoned my own weapon. "I see your weapon mirrors your twin lovers' weapons…how…poetic," she mocked with an insane smile. Seriously bitch? I glared at her with all the anger that flooded through my body. We had to win this fight. I looked over at him and he glanced back at me. We silently agreed to take this sadistic ass bitch down.
Satoko was the first to charge forward, going right for Dum without any holds barred. He raised his axe in a defensive position and effortlessly deflected her strike, parrying her for a few rounds. I watched as his axe and her blood red sword clashed back and forth, the sound of the weapons' metal ringing out into the vast expanse of the space. Dum jumped back when she was
poising for another strike. Dum was well trained in his fighting stance and quite good with his halberd. I kept an eye out on him, spotting in case I needed to jump in. So far, I had not needed to but as Satoko saw an opening to stab her sword through Dum, I jumped in, blocking her strike with my golden chain of butterflies.
"Oh ya, what's this? Are you developing your powers, my dear Rika? Quite impressive, however not impressive enough," she says as she swung her sword and used a magical strike to knock me out of the way. I had sustained a few minor injuries but not enough to incapacitate me. I had quickly jumped back to my feet. I tried to jump in again. However, Dum told me in my mind to stay back. I shook my head….I could not lose him! I gritted my teeth. But I had to trust him. Ok, Dum I will leave it to you for now.
Dum nodded at me, smiling as he readied his weapon once more. A red aura glowed around him as he seemed to be channeling some unknown magical energy. I could feel a tug on my own magic as if his was connected to mine. His long handled axe glowed red, the curved blade catching fire, he then charged forward with his fiery halberd held aloft and clashed once more with Satoko's deadly demon blade. She smirked as she parried his strikes, closely watching for any openings.
But Dum would not allow her to strike his clockwork heart….he parried with deadly strikes as his body and weapon continued to glow. He struck Satoko with deadly precision and dealing some deadly blows. She was knocked back and sustained some deep burns and cuts on her arms and legs. She was wearing her school uniform from St. Lucia with the simple uniform shirt, bow tie and pleated dark blue short skirt. Her clothes were torn slightly where Dum had got her with his weapon. I inwardly smirked; proud of Dum for examining such great fighting skills, however we could not relax yet.
Satoko spat a little blood out before she managed to pull herself to her feet once more. A deadly dark orange light glowed around her, healing of her injuries. What the actual fuck?! She merely laughed manically, sarcastically clapping as if mocking Dum's attempt to subdue her were merely child's play. "Good efforts and skills. However, not good enough," she drawled coldly. With a great burst of speed, she rushed forward with her demon sword held aloft in her right hand. Dum switched to a defense position, raising his weapon and readying the axe blade to parry her strike.
However, she used magic which allowed her to bypass his weapon completely, her eyes were glowing an ominous red as she used this power. It was as if the scene before me sucked us into a red and black void. Using my golden chain, I swung it to block her strike but I was too late as the blood red sword stabbed Dum's clock heart. I screamed, Dum fell backwards, his wound from before reopening as the sword entered his body…my blood and vision ran cold. "DDDUUUUMMMMM!" I shouted as I caught his body before it could hit the cold ground of the platform we were on. He looked up at me, smiling as if nothing had happened. His hand cupped my cheek.
"Please…don't be sad for me….I did my best…I love you, Rika….don't ever…forget that…I leave you to my brother now," he said as the life began to fade from his body. Not this shit again. I furiously did my best to use my magic to slow down his dying process. However, nothing I did worked as Satoko's cold and cruel laughter rang out…..
"Oh Rika, you are not good enough to stop somebody from dying. Then again, you never could stop our friends dying in each fragment in Hinamizawa, could you? Let this be a lesson for you….you are MINE, YOU WILL COME BACK WITH ME AND THAT IS FINAL!" she shouted in her menacing glee, I glared at her but ignored her cold words as I tried to help Dum hang on to the remaining bits of his life. I clutched him close to me…his body seemed to be fading away into the ether in a red light.
"D…Don't be…s…ad…for…me….my life….is...c..Complete…be…because I got to love you," he said softly, his voice was weak as the life continued to fade from his body. He gave me one more kiss before he passed on. His body had been absorbed into the space, leaving behind his clockwork heart. Before I had time to react, Satoko walked forward and I tried to keep her from coming any closer. However, her demonic magic was more powerful and she smirked as she raised her foot high in the air and came down on the clock, stepping down on it forcefully with a sickening "crunch" sound.
"GODDAMN YOU SATOKO HOJO!" I spat, tears blinding my vision. I clutched what had remained of Dum's clock heart and held it closely to me.
"Now, now Rika," she tuts, "Is that anyway to talk to your best friend?" she finished with a gleeful smirk.
"YOU AREN'T MY FRIEND ANYMORE! YOU STOPPED BEING MY FRIEND WHEN I FOUND OUT YOU WERE BEHIND THE MURDERS AND THE "CURSE" OF HINAMIZAWA THIS TIME AROUND! YOU HAVE ABSOLUTELY NO FUCKING RIGHT TO CALL YOURSELF MY FRIEND! YOU ARE NOTHING TO ME! YOU ARE MY ENEMY AND A FUCKING BACKSTABBING ASS BITCH! FUCK YOU!" I screamed vehemently, my anger and recent grief burning red hot in my veins. She only laughed again, her cruelty showing itself ever more.
"Oh Rika, that's cute. Now come back with me," she replied, snapping her fingers. However, nothing happened. "Huh, why can't we go back?" she questioned…trying to snap her fingers a few more times and it did not affect me.
"Cause bitch, I'm a Roleholder now. Your magic will not work on me! You'll have to kill me….I can't go back to Hinamizawa with you, nor do I want to," I spat, glaring at her once more, standing up. The remains of Dum's clock evaporated and became one with the fragments floating by us.
"Hmph fine, in six time changes, we will fight to the death and have it out. You and me! No holds barred, got it? I can't wait to make you pay for what you did to me!" she spat in reply, anger now coloring her face. It was my turn to cross my arms and smirk.
"I wouldn't have it any other way, you traitorous whore. FUCK YOU!" I spat, snapping my own fingers and disappearing from the Sea of Fragments within a cloud of gold butterflies.
I reappeared in the garden of the mansion. I was by the fountain; I sank down to my knees in the cold realization that Satoko had just killed Dum right before my eyes. My body felt cold, numb, and tears refused to fall. I stared out into the void, completely ignorant to the beautiful flowers and sounds of the trickling water of the fountains. Then Dee's thoughts rang loud and clear in my head for the first time in days….
"SIS WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO DUM!? WHERE'S DUM!? TELL ME!?" he shouted inside my mind. You would not believe me if I told you. I collapsed where I stood; passing out in the warm embrace of the grass…silent tears fell down my face.
In my disembodied state, I could feel somebody carrying me in their arms. It was a familiar somebody…was it Dee, Uncle Elliot, father, or mother? I did not know. I stayed locked away inside my mind. I could not save Dum, it was my fault he died…I could not save him from being stabbed by Satoko….I could not prevent her from crushing his clock heart under her foot…I couldn't save him, and his death was my fault…these thoughts kept haunting me….
I heard voices calling out for me. "SIS, RIKA! WAKE UP!" They were familiar voices, the voices of my new family that I had made here in Wonderland. I smiled sadly; I would never go back to them…
"You have to, if you don't then who's to stop Satoko from ganking somebody else?" rang a familiar voice. It did not sound like Nightmare…who was it then? I turned and saw the form of a tall man with short brown hair and red eyes. He wore a red coat with a black and red lined undershirt with a broadsword at his hip tucked away inside its scabbard.
"Ace, what are you doing here?" I questioned, recognizing his form.
"Hmph, who knows? I could be dead, or I could be lost," he mused with a shrug.
"Didn't you try to kill me not too long ago? Why?" I asked him.
"Was under orders from that outsider, she had made me a good deal or so I thought," he replied with another shrug. I knew he always struggled with directions…what if somebody simply guided him or gave him something to help guide his way? Just then, a magical compass appeared in my hand. It had a gold butterfly printed on the back and was ornately decorated with red and blue patterns with fancy letters for the directions. I walked toward the wayward knight and placed the golden compass in his outstretched black gloved hand.
"What's this?" he asked me, examining the compass with interest.
"A magical compass that will help you find your way around…if you're ever lost, look at this compass and its arrow will guide you where you need to go," I replied with a small nipah. He looked at me confused, and then a small smile found its way to his face. He then put it around the compass around his neck as it was on a chain, tucking it under his coat. He closed the gap between us and picked me up and hugged me. He planted a small kiss on my cheek.
"Thank you, Lady Bernkastel," he said with a smile. "Go, wake up….they await you," he said….somehow I was summoned out of my mind's cage and returned to the world of the waking….the wayward knight was no longer so wayward when he left the space….maybe I was not so wayward anymore either….Dum would want me to keep going on…so for his sake…I woke up.
The lights blinded me as I slowly came to…my vision was slightly blurry as I could make out the shapes of my father, mother, Uncle Elliot….and Dee. I appeared to be in my room, I somehow recognized the purple theme and bedding…they all surrounded me on either side of my bed. I slowly sat up, groaning slightly as I did so…then reality once again came pounding down the door on me as my eyes began to water…
"S…Satoko…sh…she…k….k…." I stuttered, tears blinding my vision. Without muttering a word, my father pulled me into his chest….
"What happened daughter?" he whispered softly, urging me to continue.
"S…Satoko…k….killed….SATOKO KILLED DUM," I cried out, tears now pouring down my face as the reality that Dum was really gone…What's worse is that I had witnessed it and could do nothing to stop it…I blamed myself…Dee shook his head as that thought entered his head….
"Nope…you did not…You did your best to help my brother…you fought alongside him until the end…for that I'm grateful. I suppose he said he'd leave you in my hands now," he replied…shocked gazes turned toward Dee as he spoke. I didn't know how to explain what happened. Even for Wonderland standards, what we had experienced was outlandish…I did my best to explain our fight in the Sea of Fragments. As I suspected, looks of disbelief colored my father's, mother's, and Uncle Elliot's faces as I spoke. However, Dee was the exception as he seemed to believe what I had experience.
"Regardless of what had happened, the point is that Dum died and Satoko fucking killed him! She even smashed his clock so he could not be revived," I finished, trying to get the words out through my tears. However, a dead calm came to rest over me as I remembered my brief encounter with Ace, giving him the compass, and then merging from mental cage. Dee was silent as I explained that part to him inside my mind, leaving that part out in my story when I retold it out loud.
"So the knight helped you wake up I take it?" he asked me inside my mind. I nodded, confirming his reply. He sighed; I sensed his hesitation to embrace me. I can't say I blame him. My anger toward him had faded, now it was replaced with anger toward Satoko…In six time changes would be our final battle, she had told me.
"I'm sorry for being angry with you, Dee. It seems it was majorly misplaced," I said inside my mind to him, not wanting to speak aloud to keep this conversation between us. Looks of confusion were colored on father and mother's faces as they looked back and forth between me and Dee. I figured we could continue this later.
"Sorry, momentary relapse," I said as I claimed to be spacing out.
"No worries, Rika. It's understandable given everything that has happened," said my mother. "Just rest for now, alright? Dee, stay with her, you're all she has left now," she added as she kissed my forehead and made me lay back down. I was not about to argue as fatigue pulled at my aching mind and body. Dee nodded and lay on top of the covers and pulled me into his chest, and I fell back asleep with him holding me and protecting me from further nightmares for the time being. "We'll figure this out," he whispered before sleep fully claimed me once more.
I woke up, my eyelids fluttering open as the light filtered through my bedroom window. Flashbacks came rushing through my mind as I sat up abruptly. Dee also sat up with me, his long dark hair hanging down around his shoulders. He had slept in his clothes which surprised me. I clutched the blanket as I remembered Dum's death…it replayed like a bad snuff film in my mind….Dee sensing my distress immediately grabs me and pulled me against his chest. He sighed heavily as he closed his eyes. I sensed part of him blamed himself for his brother dying. I told him it was not his fault…Dum did not blame him anymore and forgave him. I didn't cry because I felt like I have cried myself dry these past few time period over his death. I wish I knew endless magic; I'd bring him back to life. I cursed myself for being so weak with magic.
"Stop it Rika! Don't blame yourself! Your magic is not weak! You were strong enough to fight alongside my brother until the end. He would not want you to beat yourself up and….neither do I, please don't," he whispered as he kissed the top of my head with a harsh kiss. He kept me close to him for a long time. I felt my nerves settling down somewhat. I did not want to leave this room with my mentality being what it was right now. "I know Rika, but we have to face them sometime. I won't leave your side…I'll fight Satoko alongside you when the time comes…please…you're not alone anymore," he whispered to me. I realized he was right.
I looked up into his crystal blue eyes, seeing many conflicted emotions reflected within them. They reflected my own purple eyes. I nodded, reluctantly letting go of him so we could get ready for whatever this time period would throw at us. I went into my bathroom, cleaned up quickly, and put on a Lolita dress that had a black underskirt and white petticoat with a red overskirt and bodice. It was sleeveless with black gloves that went with it, had a black bow which I tied off in the back. Of course, I did not like wearing shoes so a black and red ribbon adorned my right ankle, similar to the one my mother wore on her left wrist.
I came out of the bathroom with a sigh as I decided to take a seat on my blue couch. My bangs fell down over my hair, hiding my eyes and my conflicting emotions. I gripped my red overskirt in an attempt to get my emotions under control. However, it did not work. I noticed Dee had disappeared briefly. He probably left briefly to go clean himself up as well. After a few moments, I decided to stand up and stretch which helped ground me a bit more in reality. I was fine, I was safe for the time being, I told myself. But I did not feel safe…I had just lost Dum, somebody whom I loved and cared about deeply along with Dee. I'm sure Dee was grieving his loss in his own way. I gave him his mental space so he could grieve without me listening in. If he wanted to talk, he could reach out to me.
With those thoughts in mind, I walked out of my room and decided to head outside to get some air. Maybe a walk around the garden and manor grounds would clear my head? I visualized the garden outside and instantly appeared out there. The light was filtering through the trees in the forest beyond as the first morning sun's rays gave the roses an otherworldly glow. It was oddly peaceful and just standing here amongst the bushes of roses as the waters of the fountains trickled in the background gave me an odd sense of peace. Even if it was only for a moment, I felt like things were going to be alright. They may be a little difficult going forward without Dum but he'd want us to be happy. He told me that before he passed on. I stifled back tears thinking about his last moments in the Fragmentary Passage. But one tear managed to escape down my face despite me willing myself trying not to cry.
Maybe the single tear was not only for Dum, but for my friends and even Satoko as well. I tried to figure out what I did to justify her throwing back into the hellish loops of June 1983. Even after being here in Wonderland for what seemed like a couple of years, I still did not have an answer. I released a heavy sigh that I did not realize I was holding as I sat down upon the edge of the fountain's pool, listening to the water flow freely below. I looked up into the endless starry sky as if searching for answers from the stars. They of course held none as all they could do was shine brightly as the morning period settled in.
As if somebody had snapped a finger, the dark twilight became dawn and then midmorning. Did I forget time periods in Wonderland were strange? There were no such things as a regular early morning, mid-morning, early or late afternoon time cycle before early to late evening. It could switch from early morning to midnight or early afternoon depending. Some periods of time lasted longer than others. I continued to watch Wonderland's odd skies, lost in my head as my thoughts wandered to my friends in Hinamizawa, hoping they were doing better than I was. What I would not give to hear one of Keiichi's inspirational speeches or hear some of Mion's optimistic words. However, even those could probably not settle my grief. I knew things were not quite so simple. Maybe their company would have been helpful, I was thinking to myself…then as the Hinamizawa Game Club, we could have helped Satoko. But it was probably too late now.
I sigh again, closing my eyes as my head drooped slightly. My temporary peace fades as I remembered my upcoming battle against Satoko. "DAMN IT! Why did things have to turn out like this?" I demanded of my surroundings. Of course the rose garden, sky, and grass did not have an answer for me. I opened my eyes again, looking up once more as if to look search for an answer. Once again, nothing could be found.
Somebody appeared before me and they seemed like a very familiar someone. She had waist lengthy lavender shaded hair with two ram like horns with a small chunk missing on the left horn. Her eyes were closed with an unreadable expression; she wore a similar kimono like the one I used to wear for performing the Cotton Drifting Ritual on the mattresses for the crowd at the Wataganashi Festival. She opened her eyes to reveal two lavender reflecting orbs. She smiled sadly at me.
"It's been too long, Rika. I am sorry I was not able to come sooner," she said with a sad smile on her face. Shock was still present on my features as it took me a moment to register her presence. I thought she had abandoned me forever after Ooshi decided to go on a mass murder rampage at the last Wataganashi Festival. "I have been searching for a way to come back to you. I have come here at the turn of the tide. As you have figured out, Satoko Hojou is the one behind this round of the tragedies you have been suffering. Then somehow fate allowed you to escape here in this unusual place. I am so sorry for not coming sooner," she explained, her lavender eyes searching my deep amethyst eyes for a reaction. I blinked a few times to make sure she was not just merely a hallucination. She still stood there in front of me as a transparent spirit. But she was there.
Overcome with tears, I threw my arms around her and released the tears I've tried to hold back a few moments ago. I buried my head in my long time mentor and dear friend's chest, allowing all of my emotions to escape. Despite her being only transparent, she still could wrap her arms around me and she petted my hair. "I did not realize you were still carrying all that pain, Rika. Let it out, you're safe now….shh….it's ok," she whispered to me, comforting me like a mother would. Before Alice, Hanyuu was probably the closest thing I had to a mother figure. Having her here now meant everything….even if it was only for a short time….she was here…she came back….thank the gods…
Once I had felt a little better, I backed away as she released me. She sat next to me on the fountain edge and I turned to her. "I lost Dum, Satoko killed him and I did everything I could to help him stay alive but I couldn't…I wanted to use the endless magic to bring him back…but I am not strong enough," I confessed. She put her hands on mine and squeezed them to comfort me.
"Sometimes, while it may hurt, we have to remember the love we felt for them and allow them to live on with us in that way. If Dum came back, would he be the same person he was when he was alive? Probably not, however you and Dee will overcome this together…and you have your new family you've made here in Wonderland…..please don't isolate again…go to them….go to them before it's too late…also allow me to see that fragment and your current weapon mirrored from the twins…" she replied with a serious expression. I realized she had a point….even if Dum revived with his clock intact; he would be somebody else that just filled that role. He would not be Dee's brother or my boyfriend….he'd be somebody different that we didn't know…that chilled me to the bone…
Following her instructions, I summoned my version of the twins' halberd axe as well as pulled the sword fragment out of my dress pocket. I handed them both to Hanyuu and she took them and they began to glow with a mysterious golden light…they floated up into the air, began to swirl closer together as if fusing to craft a new weapon…I watched as they fused in midair before my eyes, creating something completely new, yet familiar. When the light died down, a long purple handled weapon with a long curved black and blue colored blade. The suits resembling the diamond, spade, clover, and heart like the twins carried on their axes was printed on this weapon on the curved part of the blade…a blue gem reflected the budging sunlight brightly with an ethereal glow. A smaller tipped three pointed blade sat at the end which resembled the original sword the fragment was from. It floated down toward me and I accepted the mysterious scythe as it glowed when I grabbed it.
"From two incomplete weapons become a complete new weapon. That is Dum's axe fused with the Onigari no Hanryou, they came together to fulfill a new destiny…with you," stated Hanyuu dramatically as a smile bloomed on her face. The colors that could be seen on this new scythe resembled twilight which could be symbolic for a new change…hmm…I tucked it over my shoulder, unburdened by its weight as it seemed light as a feather despite its size and length.
"I shall call it…the Crimson Twilight. Maybe this is Dum's way of helping me in a way. Thank you, Hanyuu. I appreciate this..." I replied to her gratefully as I set the weapon down beside the fountain long enough to hug her. She shook her head….
"No need to thank me…I was only helping you realize the power you already have…as the new Witch of Miracles. Go forth and cut open a new path…I love you Rika….I am afraid this is farewell," she said with a sad smile. She waved and I waved back as a few more tears escaped. I hastily wipe them away to smile through them so I could bid Hanyuu a cheerful farewell. She disappeared as the sun finally covered the garden with its fresh morning rays. It was as if the sunlight absorbed Hanyuu's spirit into them once more. Unlike before when we were forced to part, this time it felt like she was passing me the mantle and the means to carve open my own fate….I grabbed the newly forged long ornate looking scythe with my right hand and swung it over my shoulder. It glowed with a lavender light in my grasp. It felt familiar somehow. I did not have time to question the semantics. I had to fight for Dum, my friends back in Hinamizawa, and for my new family and for Dee who was Dum left me with….we couldn't lose….I won't lose no matter what….I refuse to go back to hell…I came back from hell and I'm not being pulled back in again…not now, not ever….
I walked back to the mansion with a new determination, my newly forged scythe disappeared for the time being as I walked forward. I no longer was burdened by sadness of the past…I was burning with anger…anger at my former childhood friend for trying to wreck my future with her selfishness. Angry for her hurting our friends just to get back at me….I was not going to let this pass. In a cloud of golden butterflies, I disappeared from the garden…where I was being summoned to, I had no idea….
Chapter eleven will be uploaded tomorrow.