Disclaimer: I don't own them, but I wish I did.

As always thank you to my wonderful beta Heather (Txbabefan).

Chapter 11

This chapter has an angst warning. Don't hate me.

Steph POV:

Carlos had been back for two weeks. He had been staying with me since, only going home to bring back clothes. I was pretty sure most of his clothes were here. I had gone into the office this morning to go over the what our stock in the backrooms of the stores looked like and what we needed to order.

The elevator doors opened and neither of my men met me at the doors. This was strange, as either one, or both, usually met me at the door. Carlos hadn't been warm and welcoming to the fact I had Magnum, but I knew he had been growing on him. There was no way he could hate him, and he knew it. He knew Mag was important to me.

I slipped off my heels and tip-toed into the living room. On the sectional, Carlos was laying on his back, Mag laid between his legs with his head on Carlos's chest. I grinned, pulling my phone and taking a picture. Carlos's hand rested on Mag's neck as though he had fallen asleep petting him. That was definitely the cutest thing I had seen. I knew Carlos didn't hate him.

I walked into the living room and around the couch. Mag's eyes followed me around the living room; I held a finger to my lips. I walked up and pressed my lips to Carlos's. He woke up slowly, kissing me back. Then he froze. I pulled back grinning. He looked down at Mag and groaned.

"I..."

"Don't give me excuses," I grinned. "I know you like him."

He rolled his eyes. "Mag," I said. He jumped off the couch and sat, wagging his tail.

"Find me your ball," I said. He went running to find it me the ball. I straddled Carlos and leaned down to kiss him fully.

"Miss me?" I asked, grinning.

"Always," he growled, kissing me again. A slobbery ball was dropped on his chest, and I laughed. Carlos glared at the both of us.

"Babe." He said.

I smiled and tossed the ball across the condo.

"Babe we need to talk," he said, sitting up. He moved us until we were sitting the correct way forward-facing on the couch, but keeping me straddling him.

"What's wrong?"

"I wanted to finish our discussion about Jeanne Ellen."

"Carlos..."

"I don't know how she found out about you. I really don't, Babe. I passed the word that she was to stay the hell away from you."

"It was just the one time, right?" I asked softly.

He nodded. I kissed him softly. "And your done with her?"

"I have been done with her for a long time." He answered. I kissed him again.

"Then that's the end of discussion."

"There's more," he said. I sighed.

"Lay it on me."

"I want to start my own business, me and the guys. A security business. Private security, business, residential, all of that. I wanted to get your opinion."

"On?"

"The business plan, and our future."

I paused. "Our future?"

I watched his face turn sour.

"That came out wrong," I said, cupping his cheek. "We just haven't talked much about what we want."

"What do you want, Babe?" he asked, kissing my palm.

"I want a partner; I don't care if that comes with a ring or not. I need someone who will stay with me, by my side and support me. Someone I can support. I want someone to love me with no restrictions." I paused softly. "What do you want, Carlos?"

"I want you, Babe, however you'll have me. I won't share you. I won't stray. I promise to cherish you. Even if it means I have to live with the dog."

I laughed softly and kissed him. He wrapped his arms around me and pulled me closer. "We should celebrate," he said against my lips.

A week later he was moved in. We decided to have the guys over to celebrate the coming business venture. Carlos was still under government contract for two months, Les still had six months, but Tank and Bobby were out.

I was heading back out to the balcony when Lester came in the sliding door and shut it. "Stephanie, can I talk to you?" he asked.

I set down the plate I was carrying. "Find something else you didn't like about me?"

"No, Stephanie. I just want to talk."

I raised an eyebrow but waved my hand for him to continue. "I'm sorry. I've been an ass," he started. I snorted. He sent me a look and I nodded for him to go on.

"I had problems believing you were actually here to stay. Tank told me everything that happened when we were gone. I couldn't see past my own misfortunes."

"Well, Lester, as long as you promise to stop being an ass, I think we can learn to get along."

He smiled. "Call me Les, Beautiful."

I grinned at him and followed him outside after picking up the plate. Carlos took the plate from me and handed it to Tank. His arm found its way around my waist, and he pulled me down into his lap.

"Babe, we've got an offer for you," Carlos said.

I raised an eyebrow. "What's that?"

"We want you to be a partner in our company."

"Carlos..."

"We all want it," Tank said. "We all want you to work with us."

"I don't know anything about security."

"No, but you know how to run a business and get customers," Les pointed out.

"I do."

"That makes you perfect," Bobby said.

"Let me think it over," I answered.

Carlos nodded. "That's all I ask."

XXXXXX

Two weeks after Carlos had asked me to join his company, we had started working FTA's. We hooked up with some bond companies, the guys were doing captures and raking in the money.

Then Carlos got a call; they were sending him on another mission. I was there when he left again, but something felt wrong this time. I talked to Tank, and he had just said that this was a routine mission. There was and nothing to worry about.

The more time he was away, the more the feeling of dread grew. Magnum picked up on my mood He and wasn't responding in training anymore. Rick said the only thing he could figure is that he was mirroring my emotions. Right now, we were both moping around. It was midnight and I felt horrible.

The elevator dinged and I turned to see Carlos walking through the doors. I grinned. "Carino!" I said, walking towards him.

I wrapped my arms around him, and he hugged me stiffly. I stepped back. "Carlos, are you okay?"

"Just tired. I'm going to head up to bed."

"I'll be up in a minute."

He didn't respond. Mag whimpered as Carlos headed up the stairs. I stroked his head. "I don't know what's wrong either, Mag."

I headed up the stairs; Carlos was already in bed. He was wearing a t-shirt and sweats. Turned on his side away from me. I slipped into bed next to him, Mag laying down on my side.

I didn't fall asleep. I couldn't. At one thirty I slipped from bed. "Where are you going?" Carlos asked from the bed. He was still up apparently.

"Downstairs. I'm going to try and watch some TV to go to sleep."

He didn't respond. I walked down the stairs with Mag following me. I sat on the couch, bringing my knees up to my chest, before I turning the TV on and muting in. Mag jumped on the couch and nudged me. I ran my hand over his head.

To say the least, I didn't sleep. I couldn't. What the hell was wrong with Carlos? I heard him come down the stairs at five.

"Did you get any sleep?" he asked me from the kitchen.

"A little," I answered softly. Standing, I realized he was already dressed completely. "Where are you going?"

"Out." He answered.

I nodded. I called Mag to join me, and I we went into my office. I ran my hand through my hair. I came back out and Carlos was gone. Running up the stairs to the bedroom, I found my phone.

I dialed Tank's number, walking back into my office. "What's up Steph?"

"Something is wrong with Carlos."

"What do you mean?"

"He didn't sleep last night. He won't touch me, won't kiss me, won't talk to me. What's going on?"

"I heard this mission was rough on him," He said. "I don't know the specifics. Just give him some time."

"Time, I can do that," I said.

For the next five days I gave him time, until I just couldn't anymore. He sat on the couch as I walked in. Sitting on the other side, I looked at him.

"Carlos what's wrong?"

"Nothing's wrong," he answered crisply.

"Yes, there is."

"What makes you think something is wrong?" he asked, turning off the TV.

"You haven't touched me, held me, talked to me since you got back." I sighed softly. "Did something happen while you were gone?"

"Drop it, Stephanie."

"Tell me what's wrong, Ranger," I spat back.

"Don't call me that," he growled.

"Look, I know you can't tell me a lot, but what can I do to help?"

"I don't need help!" he snapped. Mag growled.

"Carlos..." I begged.

"I'm going to bed."

"I can't do this," I whispered. "God, Carlos. I love you. You're the only man I've ever loved but I can't do this if you don't talk to me, if you don't let me help you."

I walked to the elevator and snapped Mag's leash on. "I'll find somewhere to stay tonight," I said softly. "Stay in the condo. Carlos, if you need me, call me. If you need to talk, if you want to talk. Please don't shut me out, Carlos."

I walked to the elevator and called it up. I stepped in and locked eyes with Carlos. "I love you," I said softly. "Let me know if you need anything."

The doors shut as he closed his eyes. I wiped away the tears that were falling from my eyes. Mag whimpered. On the ground floor we walked out of the building, and I had the valet bring my car up. Once Mag was loaded up, I walked around and got in. I pulled away, wiping more tears away.

I had nowhere to go. I needed somewhere to stay. I had a couch in my office at the closest store; I could crash there tonight. I pulled into the back parking lot, parked and walked up to the back door. I let myself in, and careful to locked the door behind us.

Walking into the office, Mag drug his bed over to lay next to the couch. I sat down and ran a hand over my face. What was I going to do? I loved Carlos but I didn't know how to help him.

My phone rang, it was Tank. "Where are you?" he asked.

"Why does it matter?"

"Ric is freaking out. He says you left."

"I did. I couldn't do it anymore. I can't help him."

"Where are you?"

"At the office. The one closest to my condo."

"Steph, some shit went down on this last mission. I'm on my way."

"Come in through the back," I said softly.

Fifteen minutes later there was a knock on the back door. I opened it, to reveal both Tank and Carlos. I heard a whispered "Babe" from Carlos as I adverted my eyes. I walked back to the office and Tank followed me in, leaving Carlos in the hall. He shut the door.

"What's going on Steph? This isn't you; you don't run. You're strong and independent."

"Tank have you ever been in love?"

He shook his head. "I'm in love with Carlos, I have been since he took me out for coffee. This though, I don't know how to handle this." I paused. "This is out of my league. I don't know what's wrong, I can't fix it, I can't even help fix it."

"Steph..."

"No, what kind of person does that make me? Obviously, he needs something but instead of fighting it out, I ran. I ran, Tank. I'm a horrible person."

"No, Babe, you're not." Carlos said. He stepped into the office.

"Just listen to him. Let him explain before you make up your mind," Tank told me. He pressed a kiss to my forehead and walked outside. He closed the door and Carlos sat on the other end on the couch.

"What's going on?" I asked him, softly.

"The reason why I haven't wanted to tell you what happened is because it's going to change how you see me. You'll leave me but you deserve to know."

"Tell me," I said softly.

"This mission was fucked from the start. It was supposed to be a simple in and out. It wasn't, though." He paused. "We were ambushed and one of my men wounded. We had no way out. You remember Brian?"

At my nod, he continued. "He was the one who was wounded. Barely twenty-one, only his second mission. He was shot. He would have suffered, bled out. You need to understand, Babe, he begged me. He begged me to end it. I shot one of my own men, Babe."

I know this was such a carefree story until I just had to go and ad some angst. I blame Heather for making me want to write something with angst. And this isn't even close to the last of the angst we'll see in this story.