Running a gentle hand through Spencer's mop of curly brown hair, Aaron was enjoying that he and Spencer had been able to spend a lot of time together in the past few days, even if it was in the hospital. It had definitely brought them closer. He only wished it hadn't taken a cancer diagnosis to get them there.
Spencer was still groggy, having only woken up twenty minutes earlier. However, he had immediately wanted to cuddle with his daddy while watching crappy daytime TV, something which warmed Aaron's heart. Spencer was usually such a tough little kid who always liked to prove he could hang with the boys. Anytime he wanted to chill out and be cuddly was fine by Aaron.
"Hopefully we're out of here sooner rather than later and you can watch good TV programs from the comfort of the couch," Aaron said softly.
"Mm I hope so," Spencer mumbled, his words not really finding their way out of his mouth as he was still sleepy.
Aaron laughed, kissing the top of his head. "Probably, monkey, probably"
They sat in silence for a few more minutes, watching as a stuck up cheating millionaire tried to convince his wife he wasn't cheating on her with the maid.
As Spencer shifted and opened his mouth to speak, the door to the room opened and in came a doctor neither Spencer nor Aaron had ever seen before.
"Spencer hotchner-rossi?" he asked, looking pointedly at the two cuddled up on the bed.
Aaron nodded, sitting up and sliding to sit on the edge of Spencer's bed. "he just woke up, he's a little groggy"
"Ok, that's fine. I just wanted to talk to you about something, Spencer, think you can take it in?"
Spencer nodded, rubbing his eyes and sitting up a little. "I'm good"
The doctor set his chart down on the table at the end of Spences bed, extending a hand to Aaron and then to Spencer. Taking a seat on the edge of Spencer's bed, he took a deep breath to relax himself.
"I don't have a lot of time at this very moment, but I felt it was very important that I spoke with you as soon as possible," he said to both Spencer and his father, looking both of them directly in the eye to gain their trust and raport.
"I'm Doctor Edmonds, and I'll be handling all of Spencers care from now on. I specialise mainly in paediatric oncology-"
The word was barely out of his mouth before Aaron turned sharply to look at Spencer, his wide eyes filling with tears. Looking back at the doctor, his hand was slowly going up over his mouth.
"No," he said in a horrified whisper. "No, no"
Dr Edmonds looked at the little boy who was watching him curiously and anxiously at the same time, a heartbreaking expression on his face. He hated delivering this news. Despised it.
"Spencer, what do you know about your medical condition so far?" he asked softly.
"I was sick and they tested my blood and they made me have an operation where they checked my bone marrow," Spencer replied, his hand subconsciously reaching up to tug at his hair "They said the blood had to be tested"
Edmonds nodded. "Right, they did test it. Do you know what they were testing for?"
Spencer nodded. "They test it for cancer, right?"
Seeing the doctor in front of him nod, it took a moment for things to click in Spencer's mind. His expression fell with the pit of his stomach.
"Do I have cancer?" he asked in a whisper that sounded something like disbelief and horror.
Exhaling heavily, Edmonds nodded slowly, noting when his father began to cry. Reaching over to his charts, he grabbed a tissue from the box he'd brought with him and handed it to Aaron.
"Spencer has a disease called Leukaemia. It's a blood cancer that is unfortunately quite common in children his age," he said gently, placing his hand over the young boy's.
"It is highly malignant, meaning it spreads easily, and it can be quite aggressive. We do need to do a few more tests to ascertain exactly what stage yours is at, but we can accurately say that you have that particular cancer"
Spencer nodded, reaching over and slipping his hand into his father's.
"Would you like to talk about your treatment now, or would you prefer it if I came back later?" Edmonds asked softly, knowing that some patients preferred some time to let the news sink in.
Spencer glanced over to his dad and then back at the doctor. "Could you come back?" Aaron asked judging by the look on his sons face, he couldn't handle much more in such a short space of time.
Edmonds nodded, slowly rising from the bed and gathering his things. As he made his way to the door, his heart broke to hear the devastated cries of his father. That was why he hated delivering bad news so much.
Waiting until the doctor left the room, spencer turned, kneeling in front of his father. he wrapped his arms around him, burying his face in his fathers shoulder.
"It's gonna be ok, daddy. It's gonna be ok," he said repeatedly, hoping to somewhat soothe his father a little.
Aaron wrapped his arms around spencer's tiny midsection, hugging him close and letting his tears fall.
"I love you. I love you," he sobbed in a heartbroken whisper.
Spencer tightened his grip on his father, clutching at him like a lifeline.
"I love you too"
The remainder of the day had been awful.
Aaron had stopped crying long enough to call Dave, who had dropped everything and raced to the hospital after picking up the kids from school; they needed to be together as a family during a time like this.
Spencer had sat on his bed, seemingly in a numb state of shock. he seemed to be handling the news like a champion, but Aaron could see the resolve crumbling behind his golden brown eyes.
Dr Edmonds had returned to discuss Spencer's treatment. On October 2, he would start a course of 12 rounds of chemotherapy which would take them into early January. After that, he would have an eight week break to let his body recover from the damage done by the chemotherapy. After his eight weeks were up, scans would be taken and they would discuss the possibility of a bone marrow transplant.
It was a lot for them to take in.
Having sensed that Aaron needed some time to process everything, and also needed to spend time with their other kids, Dave had convinced him to go home with their other kids while he spent the night with Spencer. It had taken a lot of reasoning, but eventually Aaron and the others had left and headed for home.
Sitting in the recliner beside Spencer's bed, Dave remained fixed in one position as a thousand thoughts ran through his head.
He had lost one son before. Was he about to loose another?
No. No. Spencer would beat this. He was sure of it.
When he thought Spencer had fallen asleep, he quietly got up and went out into the hallway, needing to walk around for a bit to help clear his head.
He had promised Spencer the day after he was told he had cancer that he would do whatever he could do to help him get through whatever journey he ended up taking. And he was still going to make good on that promise.
"Mr Rossi?" came the familiar voice of Spencer's oncologist. Dave hated that it was already familiar. Spencer had only been diagnosed just over 12 hours earlier for God's sake.
"Dr Edmonds," he choked out, turning to greet the young doctor.
"How are you handling everything?" Edmonds asked softly.
"It's hard...it's a lot to take in...it's overwhelming. But I'm going to be there for my son, that's the only thing I'm certain about," Dave replied, a confidence to his voice that he hadn't felt all day.
"he's going to need a lot of support. It's a long tough rough. But he seems like a very resilient little boy," Edmonds said warmly.
"You have no idea," Dave replied with a light chuckle. "Tougher than nails some days"
Edmonds nodded confidently. "Good"
Dave spoke with the doctor for a little while longer, before the doctor excused himself to check on one of his other patients, with the promise that he would come around the next morning to speak a little more with the family.
Dave stood at the nearby window, looking out over the city from the one of the highest floors at the Allegheny General Hospital. A few tears fell for the situation his family was in.
The hospital was about to become their unwanted second home.
When he slipped back into Spencer's room, Dave felt a lot less wound up and was sure most of his thoughts were at least somewhat straightened out.
As he sat back down in the recliner, he heard a soft sob come from the bed.
His heart broke, even though he had been waiting all day for Spencer to crumble. It literally pained him to see his kids upset.
Quietly getting up and moving around to the other side of the bed, he leant down to see Spencer's face. He almost burst into tears himself when he saw that his eyes were red and swollen and he was trying desperately to muffle his sobs.
"Oh peanut...," he said softly, hearing his voice crack as he brushed his hair out of his eyes. But he was at a loss for words. He didn't know what to say.
"I have cancer," Spencer said in a heartbreakingly tearful whisper, his voice barely coming out because he was sobbing so much. "Cancer"
Closing his eyes for a moment, Dave felt the tears falling from beneath his lashes. Quickly slipping out of his shoes, he climbed into the bed with Spencer, pulling his baby boy into his arms and letting him cry into his chest.
"I can't say that it's all going to be ok, because I don't know that," he started to whisper, his voice wavering with every word. "I can't say don't be scared because cancer is an awful disease and you have every right to be scared. I won't say don't cry because I want you to cry as much as you need to"
"I'm really scared Pappa," Spencer whispered, clutching at his father's shirt as he brought the blankets up around him and tucked them around him to keep him warm.
"That's ok," Dave said tearfully, kissing the top of Spencers head. "That's perfectly ok"
As Spencer cried, Dave rubbed his back in comforting circles, crying silent tears of his own as he held and protected his little boy.
"I love you peanut. We love you. And we will do whatever we can do to help you through this," he said soothingly.
Spencer buried his face in his father's shirt, his tears creating a rapidly growing wet patch on the front of his shirt.
His whispered words were repeated, but that didn't stop them from breaking his father's heart.
"I'm so scared..."