"Hey, thanks for meeting me," Astrid said quietly for a hooded figure walking towards her.
"Sure thing," the young man replied as he approached her. She looked around to make sure no one was around. "You sure it's cool here?"
"Yeah, it's fine," she said in a hushed voice. "Everyone is training right now."
Astrid heard her phone go off with a text message from Loki. Aggravated, she groaned, blocked his number for the time being, and set her phone down on the bench while leaving his contact information still pulled up. Curiously, the young man glanced at it.
"So, how much you need?" the young man asked as normal as he pulled out a quart-sized back that contained small dime bags of heroin.
"All of it," Astrid said with a grin. He looked up at her with a confused look, and he was immediately met with a dagger she had conjured. "Hand it over."
"For real, Astrid?" he asked in disbelief. He took another glance at Loki's contact information. "You really gonna do this?"
"Yes," she said through gritted teeth as she held the dagger to his throat. "Now, hand it over."
The man rolled his eyes and handed the quart-sized bag over to Astrid, who grabbed it excitedly. "Paraphernalia too." Begrudgingly, he handed over a bag of needles and tourniquets. "Now, go."
The man rolled his eyes and turned around to leave. Once he was out of sight, Astrid ran back to Loki's bedroom with her prizes, and once the man was off the compound, he pulled out his phone and composed a message to the number he had made sure to memorize. Loki felt his phone vibrate in his pocket, and his eyes widened as he read the message.
Hey man. U don't know me but ur girl just robbed me of all my heroin. Thought u should know.
"I have to go!" Loki yelled as he sprinted out of the gym where he was training with everyone else. "Astrid!"
He frantically made his way back to the bedroom that he and Astrid had been sharing for the past month and barged in the door to see a sight he never wanted to see. Astrid was frantically trying to find a suitable vein to inject her chosen drug, but Loki quickly grabbed her and yanked the tourniquet off her arm, and he pulled the needle out of her hand.
"What did you do?!" Astrid yelled through sobs. "Loki, what did you do?!"
She tried to hurt him by punching his chest as hard as she could, but he would only react by pulling her close to him and wrapping his arms around her. "Give it back!" she yelled. At this point, everyone else had become concerned, and they were all starting to peer into the door and watch the one-sided fight unfold. Loki either didn't notice or didn't care that everyone was standing there. Tony peered towards the ground and saw the scattered drugs and paraphernalia on the floor, and he immediately motioned for everyone to go – closing the door quietly as they all walked away.
"Shh," Loki hushed Astrid as her sobs started to subside. "You're alright, my love."
"Loki, why?" Astrid sobbed. He ignored her question and just kept trying to soothe her. He lay down in bed and pulled her to him, and she found a home in his arms. Eventually, she wore herself out and fell asleep in his arms – the comedown from her adrenaline and anxiety. Loki didn't let go, and he kept his arms around her for the next hour and a half while her body recovered. He rubbed her back and placed kisses on her head – showing her that he still loved her. He repeated that she was okay and that he wasn't mad with her. Loki felt her squirming and knew she was waking up. She was physically exhausted and knew it wasn't possible to fight him off, so she tried to get closer to him instead – thankful that he was still there.
"Loki," she said quietly with sadness in her voice. "Do you hate me?"
"Of course not, my love," he answered, pulling her back so he could see her eyes. "I could never hate you."
"I'm sorry I messed up," she apologized as tears filled her eyes. "I can't do this."
"You didn't mess up, Astrid," he told her. "You just had a little slip-up, but you're okay," he placed a kiss on her lips. "And you're right – you can't do this – that's why I'm here – we can do this."
"I don't deserve you," Astrid said in a whisper as she poked at the freckles on his chest.
"Too bad," Loki argued, "because I only want you."
"Are you sure about that?" Astrid questioned him skeptically.
He lifted her chin up to make eye contact. "Why would you ever doubt my feelings for you?"
Astrid shrugged. "Because...I keep telling you that I want to give you my virginity, but you don't seem like you want it. Makes me feel like you don't want me."
"Look at me," he ordered. "I'm honored to receive such a gift," he began, "but, baby, I would hurt you if we had sex right now. Your little body is too tight – that's why we need to do other things for now. I could barely put a single finger in you the first time, and last night was the first time I do it comfortably, and you were still extremely tight – there's no way you can fit me yet."
"What if I wanted it to hurt?" Astrid asked hesitantly.
"Love, it wouldn't be a pleasurable kind of pain," Loki insisted. "It would be an excruciating, tearing kind of pain. I don't want to do that to you."
"I want you to," Astrid insisted.
"Astrid -," Loki began in a warning tone, ready to repeat himself.
"I was raped," Astrid blurted out, shocking Loki. "When I was five."
Anger filled Loki's eyes at her confession. "Astrid, I wasn't aw-,"
"No one was," she cut him off. "You're the only one who knows."
"You don't have to talk about this if you aren't comfor-," he began before being cut off.
"It was in an alleyway," Astrid explained. "I got lost in the city, and some guy tricked me into following him, and we ended up in a dark alleyway."
"I saw a photo of an alleyway in that box full of items," Loki stated.
Astrid nodded. "Yeah, that was where it happened," she confirmed. "I was found by a group of teenage boys during the... you know. They jumped the guy, helped me up, and walked me to a police officer who took me to the hospital and called my mom."
"What happened to the human scum?" Loki asked with anger in his voice.
"He got fifteen years in prison," she let him know. "He was released five years ago."
"That's disgusting," Loki scoffed. "How can someone harm a child in such an awful way and be free to walk the streets?"
"That's the American Justice System for you," she said sadly. "They'll wait until he hurts someone else to put him back in prison, but by then, it'll be too late."
"You're okay, my love," Loki said as he kissed her forehead. "Thank you for sharing that with me." Astrid nodded her head but remained quiet. "So, what does that have to do with wanting me to hurt you sexually?"
Astrid began to blush and became embarrassed for the first time around him. "Because I trust you." Loki was confused and sat up with Astrid, so she could help him understand. "When I was raped, I had no control over what was happening to me – I was just a thing for him. Now, I need to be in control – always – at all times – over everyone – everything, but I know that's not healthy – and honestly...it's exhausting. I'm terrified of losing control because then I'm opening myself up to being hurt by people around me, but I also want to feel the freedom of letting go, and there's no one I trust more to be in control of me than you."
"I understand, love," Loki kissed her head. "But I don't want to cause you any pain."
"Do you honestly want to know why I want you to?" Astrid asked nervously – picking at her nails. Loki nodded and encouraged her to go on. "It's a fantasy, a, you know, a-,"
"Rape fantasy," Loki concluded, finally beginning to understand her desires.
"Maybe if I can experience a situation similar to my assault with some sense of control, then I won't be so terrified to lose control in other situations," she went on. "I know it's weird, and it's alright if you aren't comfortable doing it, but I just thought you should know."
Loki smiled. "I'm not uncomfortable about anything so long as you give me explicit consent and understand that I will stop if you tell me to."
Astrid nodded with a shy smile. "You have my consent, but you do know that yelling stop and no is kind of a part of it, right?"
"That's why we'll use a code word," Loki said as he kissed her nose.
"How about red?" Astrid put forth.
"Perfect," Loki agreed. "During any fantasies we do, red will be our code to stop, alright?" Astrid gave Loki a deep kiss. "How realistic do you want it?"
"As realistic as it can be," Astrid confirmed. "I want the god who attacked New York – without death, though."
"So, only death is off-limits?" Loki asked with a raised eyebrow.
Astrid nodded. "I said I want it to be a realistic as it can be. We can use yellow if something is too far."
"Deal," Loki accepted. Loki snickered as he placed another kiss on her lips. "Are you feeling better?"
She nodded. "Yeah," Astrid confirmed. "I'm sorry for attacking you." She rubbed his chest, where bruises were beginning to form.
"It's perfectly okay, my goddess," he whispered. "Who knows? I may end up giving you some payback when you least expect it," he flirtatiously growled.
Loki and Astrid spent the rest of their day and night together laying in bed, talking, and enjoying each other's company. Before they noticed, they had gotten carried away, and the sun began to peek through the curtains of Loki's room. Astrid's stomach growled, and after some pleading, Loki finally convinced Astrid to go down and get something to eat.
"Morning, brother – Astrid," Thor greeted Loki and Astrid as they entered the kitchen to see what was for breakfast. Astrid and Loki nodded in response as they looked around to see what everyone was eating.
"Hey, you two!" Tony greeted the two, visibly-sleepy lovebirds. "Oof, you two have a late night?" Tony spotted the hickeys on the side of Astrid's neck and smiled. "You have a little something-something right there," he pointed out.
"Something like that," Loki responded, cutting Tony off. "What's on the agenda today?"
"We need to head out to Bolivia," Steve informed him. "You coming?"
Astrid looked up at Loki with anxiety in her eyes, and that was all he needed to make his decision. While she quietly tried to convince him to go, he easily saw through her facade.
"No," Loki answered Steve while still holding eye contact with Astrid. "Perhaps next time."
Steve exhaled. "You know that we actually do need you back at some point," Steve argued.
"I need him right now," Astrid said with some annoyance as she grabbed a bowl of cereal. "I'm sorry if that sounds selfish, but he's the only one standing by me."
"Astrid," Steve began to counter. "You know that's not -,"
"It is true," Tony admitted. "We haven't been doing a good job of helping you, so the two of you can take as much time as you'd like. It's the least the rest of us could do. Let me know if you want to borrow my vacation cottage – it might do you some good to get out of this tower. I'll leave the keys on the counter before we head out."
Loki nodded in agreement as Astrid headed back towards him with her bowl of Trix.
"Let's go, love," Loki said softly as he placed his hand on Astrid's lower back and guided her back upstairs.
Once back in Loki's room, Astrid slowly picked at her bowl of cereal, prompting Loki to worry a bit, but he didn't want to push her – after all, they had just stayed up all night together, so it was very possible that she was just tired. However, Astrid could feel his eyes on her, so she moved back towards the head of the bed, rested her head on his right shoulder, and slowly ate her breakfast. Loki rested his chin on the top of her head and rubbed her upper arm – noticing she was shaking for one reason or another. Once he felt her start sweating, it didn't take him much longer to figure out what was going on with her. With his left hand, he conjured the Buprenorphine that he had kept in his possession. She had stopped asking for it, but Loki had been pretty good at being able to tell when she needed it. Astrid watched as he held out one of the pills in his hand as well as a cup of water once she took the pill. He held her bowl of cereal and took a sip of water – followed by the pill. Loki set the water on his nightstand, and Astrid took her cereal back.
"Thank you," she muttered – finally taking a decent spoonful of cereal.
Loki squeezed her tighter to him. "I love you," he whispered as he placed a kiss on her forehead.
Astrid couldn't help the smile that lit up her face. "I love you more."
"How long do you think they're going to be gone for?" Loki asked to break the silence.
Astrid shrugged. "Not sure; why?"
"Oh, no reason," Loki smirked. "Just being curious."
"Uh-huh," Astrid said skeptically as she looked up to see the mischief in his eyes. "I kind of want to go to that cottage Tony was talking about."
"We can," Loki agreed. "Whenever you want to go, we can leave."
Astrid finished eating her cereal and set it on the nightstand on her side of the bed. "So, what if," she began in a sultry tone, "you go grab some of my clothes, laptop, laptop charger, phone charger, and whatever else you think I might need, and I'll make it worth your while once we get to the cottage?"
Loki chuckled and grinned before getting out of the bed. "Of course, my queen."
He disappeared and quickly arrived in Astrid's room – immediately grabbing a backpack from her closet and filling it with a few outfits that he liked on her, her laptop, chargers, and a few other little things such as her toothbrush and toothpaste. Before leaving, he took a second look around and noticed a large deck of cards sitting on her nightstand, and he added those to her bag as well.
"Here we are," Loki announced once he arrived back to his bedroom to see Astrid looking adorable while curled up in his bed with the blanket covering her face up to her eyes. "And just what are you doing?" he asked with a flirtatious voice.
"Being a little burrito," she said with a childish voice – prompting Loki to laugh and pat her head.
"Uh-huh," Loki answered skeptically with the grin still on his face. He set Atrid's backpack next to the bed and slowly reached for the blanket – carefully pulling it back with curiosity.
"No!" Astrid slapped his hand away and then went back to her burrito position. "Bad."
"Excuse me, Ma'am," Loki chuckled – confused, shocked, and entertained at the same time, "you are in my bed."
"What're you gonna do about it, huh?" she fired back as she stuck her tongue out at him.
Loki sighed a deep sigh and sat down at the foot of the bed – looking at Astrid and giggling at her weirdness uncontrollably – but Astrid wasn't budging. "I could overpower you," he reminded her. "Very easily – and make you move."
"Hm?" Astrid moved the blanket down a tad, and her nose became visible, and her eyebrows raised.
"Oh," Loki muttered to himself at his realization. "I get it."
Finally, Astrid threw the blanket off herself. "Just forget it," she said, clearly aggravated. She hadn't been hiding anything underneath – she was still fully clothed. She went into Loki's bathroom and locked the door behind her.
"No, Astrid," Loki began to plead as he tried to catch her. "I didn't mean anything by that."
He heard the shower turn on, and he thought he heard a couple of sniffles. He wondered if he had made her cry, and that thought was enough to put splinters in his heart. He knew the best thing to do was wait for her to come back out, so he went back and lay on his patient, patiently waiting for her to emerge. He rested his head back against the headboard and sat up straight with his legs out – his eyes closed as he tried to figure out what to say. After about ten minutes, he heard the shower turn off and the door open.
"Come here," Loki ordered Astrid. She immediately came towards him.
"What?" Astrid asked with irritation in her voice.
Loki opened his eyes and pointed to his lap. "Sit," he ordered again. "Now." Astrid bit her lower lip and again did as he wanted. "Tell me what's going on with you."
She shook her head – suddenly feeling shy. "It doesn't matter," she tried to convince him.
"Don't lie to me," he commanded – anger being heard in his voice. She nodded in understanding.
"I was just – I, was in a, um...mood," she finally confessed, clearly blushing.
Loki dropped the dominant act and lovingly brushed her hair behind her ears as she tried to avoid eye contact. "A submissive mood," he concluded. "I wasn't aware, my love."
"How were you not aware?" she scoffed. "We had this entire conversation last night." She looked down at his chest and began to poke at his many small freckles.
"I know, sweetheart," he confirmed. "But I was under the impression that you only wanted that for sex," he explained, causing her to finally make eye contact. "I didn't know that you might want to be dominated in all acts."
"I should've specified," she finally spoke quietly. "I'm sorry – it's just that I – well, you know – I've never-,"
"Done any of this. I know, my goddess," Loki finished – Astrid agreeing with a nod. "Let's get out of here," he suggested as he placed a kiss on her lips. "How does that sound?"
"Good," Astrid answered with a small smile on her face. "Let me get dressed really quick." She went to get off him and put on a change of clothes, but the moment she stood up, he grabbed her wrist – shocking her and causing her to turn around.
"Nah," Loki argued, licking his lips at the sight of her in nothing but a towel. He stood up and grabbed her backpack from the floor.
Within seconds, the two were standing in the middle of a cottage surrounded by woods and a small lake.
"This way," Loki said, pulling her by her wrist to the master bedroom. "Come here." Loki placed Astrid's backpack on the floor and lay in the bed – pulling her onto his lap and bending her down to meet his lips – giving her the feeling of being the one in control when in fact, she was anything but. Without a word, Loki unwrapped her towel and threw it across the room – landing on a chair in the corner. Immediately his hand started to stroke her wet and deprived cunt. Astrid gasped with a smile on her face, and Loki quickly flipped them over so that he was on top of her and in between her thighs. While his fingers played with her wetness, he placed kisses on her face, neck, and chest – giggling at her reactions. Then, out of nowhere, he conjured the pair of handcuffs that he had stolen from the police officer in the park, and when Astrid saw them, she became even wetter – catching Loki's attention as well. Quickly and roughly, he placed one of her wrists in a handcuff, looped the other cuff through the bedpost, and placed her other wrist in the other cuff. Once Astrid felt the cuffs lock, she excitedly looked up at the god devouring her. Loki pulled his shirt over his shoulders and threw it on the floor, and went back to kissing every part of Astrid's body.
"Please," Astrid whispered – not knowing the role she had put Loki in. He glanced up at her – almost shocked that she had tried to say anything at all. Without saying a word, he conjured a tie and used it as a gag – tying it tight around her head but leaving enough room if she needed to tell him to stop.
"You will not speak to me," Loki ordered her as he took one of her nipples into her mouth. "You will not make a single sound," he continued upon taking the other one, "and you will not move an inch. Otherwise, I will stop completely, and I will punish you." He positioned himself in between her thighs so that his mouth was inches away from her already-throbbing cunt. "Nod if you understand me."
Astrid quickly and excitedly nodded in understanding. Taking that as his cue, Loki dove into the treasure that belonged to only him – the best taste he had ever known. As his mouth nibbled and sucked on her little clit, his tongue found its way into her tight entrance. Astrid fought as hard as she could to make no noise and to stay as still as possible, but as he got her close to the edge, she let out a whimper – prompting him to stop.
"I warned you," he said with a sadistic-sultry smile as he looked down into her eyes and licked her neck. He conjured one of his daggers in his right hand and smiled as he held it in front of Astrid's face. "Nod if you trust me."
Again, Astrid nodded – feeling a rush of excitement and a small amount of fear. She did say that she wanted to see the guy that attacked New York, she reminded herself – she was getting her wish. Loki went back down to her thighs with the dagger in his hand. When he got down to her core, he turned the dagger around and pressed the handle on her sensitive clit, and laughed as she struggled against the cuffs and gag. Needing to hear her sounds, for his own satisfaction, Loki waved his hand and took the gag out of her mouth – Astrid letting out a beautiful moan and whimper for him as he moved the handle of the dagger around on her throbbing nub. Loki entered a finger into her tight entrance, causing Astrid to buck her hips. The moment he curled his finger against her g-spot, she squirted for him, and Loki quickly caught her juices with his mouth, moaning at her divine taste. He could hear the handcuffs being yanked at from above – knowing she wanted nothing more than to hold his mouth tight against her...but Loki had other plans. He placed soft, delicate kisses on her throbbing core, and he picked the dagger back up and smiled up at his needy girlfriend. While Astrid's eyes were closed as she tried to catch her breath for what was next, Loki held the blade of his dagger and slowly slide it in her tight, little body. She screamed at the sensation of being slowly torn, but at the same time, it was the best feeling she had felt in her life. While the handle of his dagger was nowhere near the size of his member, she was getting some idea of the pain he referring to, but she found herself being more turned on at the thought of it being him inside of her. She knew, however, he would wait for the right moment to surprise her with that. Loki moaned at her screams and moans and slowly twisted the dagger around in an attempt to stretch her out – waving away his pants and slowly stroking himself – no longer able to avoid his need for a climax. Astrid's entrance began to bleed due to the tearing, and as he slowly pulled the handle out, he used some of his magic to stop the bleeding, but she didn't seem to notice that he had torn her that much. Needing more of her, Loki concealed his dagger and uncuffed Astrid so that he could rearrange her.
"Sit on my face," he ordered as he lay down on his back. She did what he wanted, and his mouth was immediately on her beaten-up core and swollen little nub. Astrid took him into her mouth and went down as far as she could – eliciting a moan from him, which spurred her on more. She stroked the base with her left hand, and with her right hand, she played with his tightening balls. Loki wasn't responding how he usually did, however. Usually, when Astrid would bring him such pleasure, he would become rougher with her – leaving bite marks and hickeys on her lower lips and her inner thighs – this time, however, he kept the slow pace he had started with minutes earlier. He wasn't trying to be rough, she realized; he was trying to heal her however he could – knowing she would hurt later that day or the next. Although he wasn't rough, he was still bringing her orgasm after orgasm, and he swallowed as much as he could of her. Eventually, she felt him begin to shake – the sign that he was close to cumming. She made sure to cover as much of him as she could, and when he finally came, she didn't waste a single drop of him.
"I love you," Loki said softly as they lay in the aftermath of their bliss. He was softly rubbing her upper arm as she rubbed and rested her head on his chest – again, poking at his small freckles.
"I love you more," Astrid responded quietly, fatigue heavy in her voice.
Loki chuckled. "What's with you and poking my freckles?"
"They're cute," she answered with an innocent tone and shrug. "I don't have any that I know of, so I like to see them – they're like little polka-dots – little buttons."
"I haven't shown you my true form," Loki sighed nervously. "You could trace all the patterns you wanted to."
Astrid looked up and rested her chin on his chest. "I want to see," she whispered. Loki smiled and pulled away from her slightly.
"I'm going to use a spell on you so my skin won't hurt you," Loki explained as he touched her skin and her body glowed green. "You already know I'm a Frost Giant, so you can probably figure that -,"
"Your skin is extremely cold," Astrid concluded. "It makes sense," she smiled.
"And I don't want to burn you," he added on with a quick smile. Astrid nodded in understanding, and she watched in amazement as his alabaster skin turned into a beautiful shade of blue and gorgeous patterns appeared. She stared at him in awe – unsure of what to do. She wanted to touch him, trace all of his markings, but she felt like she needed permission to touch such a beautiful creature. She straddled him and hesitantly held her hand up to his chest, and traced a marking in the air just above his skin. "You can touch me," Loki chuckled. Astrid smiled in response, and she ran her index finger over his freezing skin and traced the same marking that started on his right shoulder, went over his right peck, under his left peck, and ended on his left shoulder.
"You're gorgeous," she said as she looked into his blood-red eyes and placed a deep kiss on his lips. Loki held her head with both of his hands and rolled over so that he was on top of her.
"I wish I could keep you forever," Loki said softly as he placed a kiss on her cheek.
Astrid turned her head to look him in the eyes. "Then keep me."