My hope of winning is dashed as soon as I see the recaps of all the reapings on TV. And when I say dashed, I mean my hope ran away slapping me in the face because my hope of winning was downright ridiculous.

I was escorted onto the train by two Peacekeepers as soon as I was done saying my goodbyes. I met my escort formally for the first time, (completely oblivious, by the way), ate lunch, stayed in my private car all afternoon mostly planning, and maybe a little crying, ate dinner, and started watching the recaps. And, most importantly, realizing I'm screwed.

The tributes from 1 and 2 are natural Careers, (coined because being a tribute is their career. As is being a Victor) and downright terrifying. The pair from 1 last year was also scary to watch, especially when it came to the final showdown with Peeta Mellark and Katniss Everdeen, but these are far worse. Probably because I have to share an arena with them this time around.

The boy from 4, Oliver, looks like he's my age. He also has bright red hair, too. It's a very common trait in 9, more people have it than don't. The boy from 4 looks so eerily like Horace when he was young, it's startling.

His partner also looks like she's a Career, unlike Oliver. She's broad-shouldered and powerful-looking. Instantly I feel a shiver down my spine just looking at her.

Most of the other tributes pass me by. There's a girl from 5 with bright red hair, too. She looks mysterious. I don't pay too much attention until my district comes up. I watch myself walk up to the stage, moving like a robot. I'm standing onstage, looking totally expressionless, and maybe tough. At least, I hope I look tough. If I do, that's all spoiled when I start smiling. That must've been when I saw the Covey.

10 ends, and 11 starts. There's a girl named Rue who definitely looks twelve, and she holds her head high just like I did. I smile a little when I see her. At least I'm not alone in being tiny. Then the boy is called, and he's huge. Thunderous. Certainly a contender. His name is Thresh. Maybe he'll enjoy thrashing people to death. There have been Victors in the past who have made murderous nicknames out of their reputations. Cillbert the Cutter comes to mind.

12 finishes off the Reaping with a blonde-haired girl, and when Peeta Mellark sees her, he doesn't look happy at all. Then a skinny little boy comes up onstage, trembling and shaking like mad.

"He won't get out of the bloodbath." Jasper says as he turns off the TV. I just nod. It feels cruel, but it's probably true.

"Bet you'll get out just fine though. Those Capitolites won't want you to die." he says bitterly.

"Now, now, Jasper, be polite to your fellow tribute." Larret chides.

I scoff. "They'll move on quickly after I'm dead." I retort.

"Hey now-" Anya says before Jasper cuts her off.

"Yeah, like that'll happen. You're gonna get loads of sponsors and a great score in training and you'll be their favorite. Meanwhile, I'll be scrounging to get a single piece of fruit to live off of." he rolls his eyes as he says this.

I leave the room in a huff, leaving my mentors and escort, and a very annoying district partner behind.

Later, there's a knock on my door. "Come in," I say. It opens, and in walks Felix Willton, the only living male Victor 9 has to offer. There are some dead ones, but he's the only living one we've got.

"I'd like to talk about what you said to Jasper." he says, sitting on my bed, across from me.

"He deserved it."

He laughs a little. "Maybe. But, he's going through the same thing as you. He's a tribute in the Games, too. He's scared."

I look up at him. "That doesn't mean he has to take it out on me. Look at me. I'm the scrawniest in my class, and I've never used a weapon aside from a knife. And that was for cutting up food for supper." I tell him.

"You're a really negative one, aren't you?" He asks.

I'm a little annoyed now. "Well, I was hopeful, but you saw my competition. I'm doomed. And what did you even come in here for? I already know who you are, and you know who I am."

He smiles. "Yeah, I guess I can understand that. And, I came in here to check on you. I barely saw you at all this afternoon, and you barely talked at dinner and supper. I just wanted to see how you're handling all this." he explains.

I shrug. "I mean, I was always afraid it would happen. And now that is, I guess it's not that big of a surprise. I'm just trying to figure out what to do next."

"Have you tried asking her?" Felix asks.

I violently shake my head. "No. I don't want to end up like her. And what could she say to help me? You know what she's like."

He sighs. "Yeah. I do. But hey, being around her at least makes me work hard on staying sane. So, it can't be all bad, right?"

"I guess," I respond.

"Yeah. So, if there can be something good about Anya's situation, then there's gotta be something good about being a tribute."

"What could possibly be good about being a tribute?" I ask doubtfully.

"Well, when you win, you really appreciate life a lot more. Your family, friends, even things you don't think you would, you appreciate it all. Use that to be your motivation, Gelsey. Fight to stay alive in the arena so you can go home. Both for your loved ones, and yourself. Do you understand?"

I find myself nodding, though I know already I'll need time to think about it before I really do understand.

He pats my shoulder. "I'm not giving up on you, kid. We're gonna find a way for you to win."

He leaves the room, leaving me with a lot to think about.

For one, is he saying all the same things to Jasper?

Sleeping on the train is surprisingly easy. I didn't think I'd be able to sleep well at all, considering the circumstances, but the Capitol plush beds make it hard to resist rest.

I'm told I can wear whatever I want since we won't be arriving in the Capitol until after breakfast, and I'm heading straight to the Remake Center as soon as I arrive. So, I pick a pair of black leggings and a long red shirt. It's comfy, like the clothes I like wearing at home.

Though there's a wide selection of shoes to choose from, I don't pick any. I prefer going barefoot when I can. Shoes feel confining. I leave my train car and go through a few before arriving in the dining car. Felix and Jasper are already there eating.

"Morning. How do you do?" Felix asks cheerily as I sit down.

"Fine, I guess. How do you do?" I ask as I survey the food on display. I don't even recognize some of it. I do recognize grapes, however, and help myself to a handful. Felix laughs and shakes his head.

"Alright. But you gotta try more than that. This is the good stuff. And, you couldn't hurt to gain some weight. From a technical standpoint, it'll help you in the arena." he says as he passes me a few strips of meat that I don't recognize. I guess the confusion is written across my face because Jasper joins the conversation rather rudely.

"Surprised you don't know what bacon is." Jasper pipes up.

'You know as well as I that this stuff would never be available back home. No one would be able to afford it." I fire back.

"Your family would be able to."

I can feel my face going red with anger. "I grew up in the industrial part of the district. Not Victor's Village. I have humble origins like everyone else. And I'll bet you had to have Felix tell you what this stuff," I gesture to the bacon, "is, too."

Jasper looks like he's going to talk, but Larret walks in. "Good morning, everyone! How excited are you both for getting to see the Capitol for the first time ever?" she chirps.

There's silence. I don't know what to say to that, and I'm guessing Jasper and Felix feel the same way since neither of them is talking. This doesn't seem to affect Larret.

"Well, I'm excited for you! Of course, you'll both need some serious time in the Remake Center until you're Capitol-ready. You poor things have probably never even heard of proper hair care, have you?" she asks.

Jasper bristles. "We have more important things to spend our money on back home. Like food." he says darkly.

Larret just chuckles. "How cute! Well just remember when you get to the Capitol, be polite and friendly to everyone! You never know who would want to sponsor you!"

I just nod, which seems to satisfy her. We all eat in relative silence for the rest of the meal until Anya arrives.

She comes in dressed in all red, just like usual. Back home people call her Bloody Anya. Partly because of her clothes, but mostly because of what went down in her Games. The red clothes don't exactly help her reputation, though.

Anya sits down right next to me, grinning widely, which unnerves me. It always has, ever since I was little. When Horace and I went to say goodbye to her in Victor's Village a few days ago, before the Reaping, back when we were hoping she would be the only one of us going to the Capitol, she was grinning just like she is now. A grin that makes you think the person isn't all there…

"I had a wonderful dream last night. Gelsey, you were in the Games, killing just like I did. I was so proud."

Jasper drops his fork. Larret looks uncomfortable. I stare at the table. Felix clears his throat.

"That's nice, Anya. But, I'm sure Gelsey will go through the Games in her own way." he says in a calm tone, doing his best to keep her from going into one of her rages, I can tell.

Anya just laughs to herself. Then she turns to me and makes me look her in the eye. "Promise me you'll make me proud, Gelsey? You'll bring our family even more pride? Just like I did?"

I just swallow. "We'll see, Aunt Anya."

At that point, we arrive in the Capitol.

Surprise!