Skip Beat! is the work of Yoshiki Nakamura.
Footnotes at end of chapter.
Part III.
Ten was nervous. It was so unusual for Kyoko to leave the set early for any reason, and the fact that she'd gone that afternoon was a surprise. Kyoko had been planning to stay at Versailles, hadn't she?
Damn it. The girl was usually reliable, though when she did an unexpected thing, she did it just when you needed her to be predictable. Ten still remembered the frantic goings-on in Guam back when Kuon was still keeping his identity secret. Thankfully, Kyoko hadn't seen him back then. But it seemed as if no surprise had been spoiled: Kyoko had sounded a tiny bit strained in the call, but she did also sound like she was in the middle of a busy street. Nothing to indicate that she'd found out about their plot.
Ten turned from her pacing and looked up just as Kyoko was entering the room.
Something was wrong.
Kyoko's entrances were usually unobtrusive, in line with the way she cultivated her anonymity. Though a veteran now of the showbiz world, the actress usually retained the wide-eyed cheerfulness that she had when Ten had met her for her Setsuka transformation. But today that actress was coming into the room like a whirlwind. She was smiling and strutting as if she were on the red carpet, and everyone was staring.
"Muse-sama!" Kyoko said, spotting her. "I made it!"
"Excellent. You know you worry me when you disappear like that!"
"Muse-sama! I haven't done that since…" Kyoko broke off suddenly. "Well, anyway, shall we get to it?"
The pause wasn't lost on Ten. Guam, she thought. She hasn't done that since Guam.
"Sure, but...Kyoko, is everything ok?"
Ten saw a shiver run down Kyoko's back, but the actress smiled brighter than ever. "Of course, Muse-san!"
Ok, don't tell me, then, Ten thought. Kyoko bounces back quickly, though, and Kuon's coming soon. Hopefully he'll get to what's bothering her. "Ok. I was just checking. You seem...unusually cheerful."
"Just excited, Muse-san," Kyoko smiled. It was beginning to feel like a brittle mask. "After all, it's not every day I get to shoot for Vogue in Versailles."
Ten looked at her and thought, If she keeps smiling like that, her face is going to crack and fall off. No mistaking it. Did Kuon let something slip?
"Do you want to see the dress?"
"Sure."
Ten led Kyoko to the little side room she'd partitioned to hold the dress. She opened the door and turned to watch Kyoko's face.
Kyoko's eyes had widened. The dress was magical. For a moment, Kyoko forgot the events that had consumed her the last few hours and just stared.
"Muse-san...ano...is that the dress? I thought we were modeling contemporary evening wear…this looks like one of the production's costumes…? It's a princess dress, Muse-san! A princess dress!"
It was illuminated in the afternoon light that shone through the large French windows. It was a classic robe a la francaise, shaped and constructed just like Marie Antoinette's dresses. A square neckline was framed by tiny ruffles and rosettes, with a massive skirt held aloft by petticoats and panniers. At first glance the over-skirt and sleeves seemed made of a solid deep blue silk, with the bodice and under-skirt embellished in a floral design. Gold embroidery and gold leaf shot through the dark blue. As Kyoko stepped forward, the dress came into focus and she gasped…
"Tsujigahana!" (12)
Kyoko had spent her entire adolescence wearing kimono, and her time with the Fuwas had given her an appreciation for the crafts that still flourished in her hometown. It was a necessity for those practicing tea to know and understand how and when to wear them. She ran her fingers across the dark blue fabric, her practiced eyes noting the details on the dress. There was no mistaking the details on it. The silk was damasked with a pattern of stylized chrysanthemum petals, and then dyed blue with what had to be natural indigo. Rising from the skirt's hem was the unmistakable look of real tsujigahana, with flowers also dyed using the yuzen technique, couched with gold thread as it rose towards her bodice. It was French in form, but Japanese in substance. This dress was made in Kyoto. Or parts of it were. Aizome? Muji-na-giku rinzu. And tsujigahana, with yuzen tsubaki and...a river? Using surihaku!? Did Julienna do this? Winter flowers in May, she thought, but why? Maybe she didn't know she was using winter flowers. Maybe it doesn't matter to Americans. And why use indigo? Isn't that needlessly expensive? This dress must've cost a fortune! She couldn't be sure, but the river looked a lot like the one she and Corn had played by as children.
An unbidden thought came to her head, This dress was made for me.
And then another, as she smiled wryly, I've certainly gotten full of myself. Julienna must've been inspired the last time she visited us in Tokyo.
I'll miss calling her Okaa-san. And that thought wiped the smile off her face. And there is no 'us.'
Ten was watching the play of emotions cross Kyoko's face. For an actress, she was remarkably easy to read. Wonder, surprise, and then, for a moment, a dark, haunted look that was replaced immediately with the same wooden smile that Kyoko had walked in with. What in the…? Ten thought.
"Ah haha ha...I guess I'm playing princess tonight, Muse-sama!" Kyoko said. "Shall we get started? Do you want me to get into the dress first?"
I thought she'd be more excited, Ten thought. I'm surprised she didn't do that weird dance the way she does whenever Kotonami-san is in costume. But she isn't. I wonder. Maybe she only does that thing she does when it's someone else. Is it her professionalism?
"No, let's do your makeup first. It'll be hard to move once you get into the dress. I'll help you. You know they didn't make these so that you'd be able to dress on your own."
And Kyoko followed Ten's lead back to the makeup chair, where she sat still as the Muse of beauty did her work. She sat still as her eyes were lined, still as her lips were rouged, still as her hair was curled. Fortunately, Kyoko thought, I'm not expected to talk when I'm having makeup applied. She schooled her face into as Ten helped her into the dress, she stood with her back straight and her arms folded in front of her, like a nakai waiting out a drunk customer. She meekly stepped into the glittering crystal-encrusted Louboutin heels that doubled as her glass slippers for the evening. (13) Her eyes looked forward in a hundred-yard stare as Ten brought the tiara Ruto discreetly handed her to place on Kyoko's head, and barely gave it a passing glance. Ten wasn't even sure if she saw it at all.
Wait, she's not reacting to the tiara? She's not ok. She's like a doll tonight, Ten thought. An animated doll. First it was storming in like she was about to go to war, and now it's 'Yes, Muse-san. No, Muse-san. It's very lovely, Muse-san.' I want to shake her.
"Kyoko-chan," Ten said, hoping to rouse her charge. "Shall we go to a mirror? Do you want to see?"
"If it's ok with you, Muse-sama, I'd rather not."
A puzzled look greeted that statement.
"I think I'll just be more nervous if I see myself. I'm pretty sure everything I'm wearing costs more than I could hope to pay back if I mess things up. I'll feel better after the shoot." And I just don't have the energy to pretend I'm happy when I don't have to pretend, Kyoko thought.
Ah, so it's nerves. Still, that's unusual for her. She's worn expensive clothes before, certainly. But I'm sure she'll feel better once Kuon's here. Ten busied herself with cleaning up her station while waiting to change into her own gown for the evening.
"Wait here, Kyoko. Kuon will be here in a bit to take you to the set."
Kyoko waited by the window as the sun sank lower, catching a ghostly reflection of herself in the glass. I look like Cinderella, she thought. A Cinderella who has many godmothers. But it's a pity midnight struck early. No such thing as magic. I probably would have felt better in rags.
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Dusk was setting in when Kuon took up the reins to the antique phaeton to pick up Kyoko at the hotel to bring her onto the palace grounds.(14) One picked up strange skills as an actor. Along with figuring out how to play the slow bits of "Fantasie Impromptu" in Dark Moon, Kuon had learned how to drive a carriage for a period piece in which he'd played an English squire. (15)
Everything was ready. Paper lanterns lined the drive to the Trianon, where thousands of Queen Rosa roses covered the ceilings and featured on the candlelit tables. Fireworks were on alert. Acrobats and contortionists were swallowing swords and breathing fire. There was a string quartet playing chamber music in the palace, to be replaced by a larger orchestra later that evening.
The gathering ended up somewhat larger than Kuon had first envisioned, as the entire cast and crew of Rose of Versailles had decided to come, along with a good portion of the old Dark Moon and Box R casts, as well as people from other projects he and Kyoko had been part of over the years. Directors Shingai and Morizumi were on hand, as were the old Kimagure Rock crew and Koga. He felt gratified that so many people from the beginning of Kyoko's career were in attendance-and so many of them had said "FINALLY!" upon receiving the invite. In keeping with Kyoko's penchant for fairy tales, the theme had been Cinderella's ball, and the guests did not disappoint. Those who were part of the Rose cast wore their costumes. Others brought their own evening dress, in various stages of historical accuracy. Light appetizers were being served as cases of Dom were being opened. A full meal would be served later, when he brought his fiancee to meet their guests. The party had outgrown the little palace and had spilled out into the courtyard.
Kuon had adopted Lory's preferred method of announcing guests into the hall, and he left just as Yashiro was being announced. The man patted him on the shoulder and said, "Go get your girl."
Dressed as Kyoko's matching prince, Kuon drove the phaeton to the hotel's grand entrance, where she waited. He realized he was terrified. Though he lived with her, loved her, and saw her daily, he all-of-a-sudden felt like he didn't know what to say. He pulled up to the doors and handed the reins to a valet who clearly didn't know what to do when handed horses instead of car keys.
"Just hold the reins, we'll be out shortly," Kuon said.
Kyoko exited the doors just as he reached the foot of the stairs and he stopped breathing for a moment. She glittered in the twilight. The tiara caught the light and sparkled, the gold on the dress glowed. But it was her face that he couldn't wait to see. He was smiling as she descended, holding out his hand to take hers. He couldn't hear anything over his own heartbeat. People stared. It was no secret that there was a show being shot on the premises, but a smiling Kuon Hizuri dressed as a prince was enough to stop anyone in their tracks.
Everyone except Kyoko.
She was an arm's length away when Kuon realized the smile she had on her face didn't reach her eyes.
He closed the distance and bent to kiss her lips. She stopped him with a finger.
"We have a shoot, Kuon, and Muse-san has worked very hard to make me pretty this evening," she said.
"You're beautiful on your own, Kyoko. Ten didn't have to do anything."
"Playboy." Something about the way she said it felt cold and sharp. "Shall we?"
She turned away from him and then clambered onto the phaeton on her own, without so much as glancing at him. He scurried to take the reins, increasingly anxious. What's happened? Did Fuwa somehow manage to crash this entire thing?
Silently, he drove them away from the curious eyes of passersby. Once past the palace gates, he reached for her hand.
"Kyoko."
"Kuon."
"What's wrong? Why won't you look at me?" She looked at him then, but her eyes were closed off, unreadable.
I'm not acting very well, am I? Kyoko thought. If he can tell how I'm feeling, the shoot will be ruined. I must act so I look like Kyoko in love. I'm out of character.
"Don't worry about it," she said, placing her hand in his and giving him a smile.
Is she *acting*? he thought. Why? Seriously?
He squeezed her cold hand in his as they drove along in silence. The phaeton moved along the avenues of the old palace gardens, and as they came into view of the Grand Trianon, he looked over at her and stopped the phaeton.
He kissed the hand he was holding.
"I know something's wrong, Kyoko," he said. It's now or never. I don't know why or what's bothering her, but something tells me I need to say something now before we get to the masquerade. He looked over at her still, stiff form, ramrod straight as she looked straight ahead. "Listen...you know these past years with you have been the happiest in my life. I wouldn't trade any of it. And lately, I've been thinking about our future, and how m-"
"STOP! Don't!" She hurled the words at him, finally looking him in the eye. For years afterwards he would be haunted by the look of despair on her face. She tore her hand from his and jumped out of the carriage, gown and all, and was sprinting across the manicured garden before he could recover from her outburst.
"Fuck," he muttered, dropping the reins and hoping the horses wouldn't run off. He gave chase.
He'd forgotten how fast she could be. Any hope of a ball gown or heels restricting her or slowing her down was dashed as she quickly outstripped him in his stupid French prince outfit. He finally caught up to her as she stumbled and fell on the marble floor of the Temple d'Amour's pergola.
She crumpled as he reached her.
"I know what you're going to say, Kuon, and I wish you'd waited until we were done with this evening's shoot. I saw you with Moko-san. And I...I...I know she's so much more beautiful than I am...and she's such a wonderful person...and a wonderful actress...I love you both so much...but you'll have to forgive me right now because I can't be happy for you yet."
She sat on the floor under the statue of Cupid, her dress splayed out under her in a pile of silk and lace. It would have been beautiful if she hadn't been sobbing. She was finally looking at him. Her tears were running down her face unheeded.
He crept closer to her, knelt down next to her...reached out his hand to her…
She slapped it away.
"Kyoko...what are you talking about..?"
"How could you, Kuon? I...really believed you...I really thought you would've ended things before doing that. You've been vague with me for a week and then I try and ask you what's going on...and you don't tell me...Since when do you hide your calls from me? ...my boyfriend and my best friend embracing in the middle of a Paris street, outside a jewelry store? I love you both...but I wish I hadn't seen that. I can pull myself together tonight for the shoot...my makeup's all ruined, I'm sure Muse-san can fix it...but please...please don't say anything. I'll get another room after we're done here tonight…you didn't have to pretend to still love me for the shoot. I'll figure out what to do about Lady Oscar...it'll be hard but I...I...I'm an actress. I'll leave it all behind when we're on the set. I promise..."
"Kyoko, please listen-that's not what you thought it was-"
"Liar. Playboy. You don't have to pretend anymore, Kuon. I've already decided I'd watch over you both." And I said I wouldn't cry, she thought.
"Kyoko, goddammit...fuck."
The words echoed off the Temple's dome like a bullet ricocheting off of metal.
"I'm not Sho, Kyoko. I'm not some fuckboy who'll use you and leave you...and frankly, this hurts. I refuse to be convicted for something I did not and will never do. My life is yours, Kyoko, all of it-I haven't held anything back. But you're acting like the very best of me can never be true enough for you."
She hadn't expected his anger.
"Do you remember what you said about Mio, all those years ago?"
"The scars are on your heart, Kyoko."
He paused.
The silence lengthened in the Queen's garden. He could see the lit windows of the Petit Trianon reflecting in the pond behind her. His parents, Lory, Kotonami-san, Maria-chan, Amamiya-san, Yashiro-they were all there, waiting for their favorite couple. They didn't know their favorite couple was in the twilit garden in tears.
He knelt by her, taking her hands and lifting up her chin slowly. The dress was well and truly trampled, now.
"I love all of you, but please...don't push me out. Please trust me. Please...say you'll trust me. You must know that Kotonami-san and I would never betray you like that...don't you have faith in me?"
"I treasure you and I treasure your love. I always have. I trust that you give it to me with your whole heart. Whatever you think of yourself, Kyoko, I know that the love you've given me isn't conditional. I know that you're not waiting for some other prince who's better looking than I am or richer than I am. Why would you think I'm waiting on someone else to take me from you? Why do you think I'd have spent three years of my life desperately trying to never leave your side? Do you think so little of me? If you never had enough faith in me to trust me, then why would you stay with me? Why would you stay with someone that you know will just cheat on you? Do you hate yourself so much?"
He took her hands and held them closer, placing her palms to his chest. She could feel his racing heart under the embroidery of the vest he wore.
"Tell me if I'm wrong."
He kept moving closer to her, moving his hands from hers and pulling her entire body closer to him.
"You must know I would never hurt you. You must know Kotonami-san would never hurt you. You must know that every single day and night of these years we've been together, I have only ever loved you. You must know that I've loved you since we met as children. You know you are the only goddess I have ever sworn to, and there will never be anyone or anything to keep my soul from finding yours."
A sob escaped her then. She shut her eyes, not knowing whether or not she believed him. But she felt a little spark of hope inside.
"Then what did I see, Kuon? Moko doesn't hug people. She's famous for not hugging people."
"Kyoko," he breathed, "the thing is...Kotonami-san came with me to pick this up today...Won't you open your eyes?"
When she did, he was on his knee. And in his hand, he had a small red box, which he opened to reveal the ring he'd bought earlier that day.
"Kyoko, will you marry me?"
There was a long pause.
"I'm terrified, Kuon."
He flinched at the fear he saw on her face.
"I'm terrified you'll wake up one day and you'll be stuck with me...and no makeup will ever hide how plain I am, or that someday you'll just be bored-"
"Even if you won't believe me when I say that you're the most beautiful woman in the world, won't you at least believe your fans? The magazines? People's Sexiest Woman Alive? Millions of people believe you're the most beautiful woman in the world, Kyoko. Even if you don't believe me, surely you must know that we all can't be insane."
Sniffles.
"Kyoko, if some horrible accident took away my face and my career, would you still love me?"
"Kuon...of course-yes! I-"
"Then even if you don't believe you're beautiful, don't you think I'd still love you?"
He moved to cradle her head and then pressed his lips to her tears. She whimpered softly as he caressed her face and then her lips. He moved them so she could sit on his lap, his hands encircling her waist as he held her close to his chest. She clung to him. He didn't know how long they sat there as she quieted.
"I'm sorry, Kuon. For doubting you."
"I guess I'm not good at sneaking around. I wish you'd said something. The look I saw on your face...I never want to see it again."
"The dress…" she murmured.
"Was made for you. Every strand of silk was woven for you. You're worried about it, right? Don't." She hasn't said anything about the tiara yet. Maybe she thinks it's rented.
"But the shoot-"
"Damn the shoot."
Just then the orchestra started tuning. Kyoko's brow wrinkled.
"Kuon...is that...an orchestra?"
The jig is up, Kuon thought.
"Yes."
"Why is there an orchestra at the photoshoot?"
His arms tightened around her waist. "It's not a photoshoot."
"Wait...what? Then...why…?"
"It's a masquerade. Your ball, Cinderella." She looked up at a blushing Kuon. "It sounds so ridiculous now, doesn't it? I've been so nervous about spoiling the surprise. I couldn't talk to you about it, and I thought you'd be so busy you wouldn't notice. And instead...I hurt you."
"So the shoot?"
"Will be next week."
"Then the dress…?"
"Really is yours, Kyoko. I thought...that maybe...since you've never taken a princess role that perhaps you'd like your own princess dress. Mom has her collection for the real shoot next week."
Kyoko looked down at the dress which she'd admired but disregarded, crumpled into an unsightly heap on the ground. Her eyes watered.
"Aizome?"
"Ai for ai."
"The tsujigahana?"
"By Kubota-san's atelier."
"Tsubaki and kiku?"
"Because you were born in December."
"And...the river…."
"Our river. In Kyoto."
"Julienna…"
"Helped me by making my imaginary dress real."
"Then...then you...did...all this...for me...and I...I ruined it...I am such a horrible person, Kuon, I'm sorry…"
She managed to do a dogeza before he could stop her.
The tiara fell off her head.
She grabbed it as the pins came loose...and then gasped as she saw the stones.
I was right. She didn't even notice it, he thought.
"Kuon...this...I didn't even look at it...are these…"
"Just like Corn. I couldn't crown you with anything less."
"...so…"
"Yes, the tiara's yours, too."
"What!? I couldn't possibly accept this, Kuon...this is insane. Please...this must be extremely expensive…!"
He laughed at her. After her mad dash across the grounds, it felt as if the world was righting itself. This was his Kyoko. He hadn't expected today's events, but this, this was entirely what he'd known she'd do. He wiped away the new tears that had started falling down her face. "Nope. Yours. You keep it. Wear it around the house if you want. Actually, it turns into a necklace, too, so you can wear it for the next red carpet."
He pulled them to their feet as the orchestra began playing in the distance. Taking the tiara from her limp fingers, he pinned it to her head crookedly and grinned before sweeping her around the floor into a waltz.
When the music ended, they stood facing each other, his forehead on hers as their fingers intertwined.
"Yes," she whispered, "I'll marry you."
He kissed her then, quietly, reverently, as if it were their first time, and then put the ring on her finger.
"I love you too, Kyoko."
He held her as the orchestra began another piece. As she snuggled into his shoulder, he texted Yashiro: Fireworks now. 10 to Temple d'Amour.
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Ten found them entwined in the Temple as the last sparks were falling from the fireworks display. Kuon had figured Kyoko would need a touch-up, so he had asked Ten to find a hidden corner of the Trianon for hair and makeup.
"Congratulations, you two! Am I the first? I'm so hap…" Ten's mouth fell open as she saw Kyoko. The dress...the dress could be salvaged. All it needed was some straightening. But Kyoko looked like a raccoon. A raccoon with a tiara barely hanging onto her tousled hair.
"Kuon! What in the hell did you do!?"
Ten was still muttering when she got them back into her station.
Fifteen minutes later, Kyoko had been transformed back into a princess. She was thanking the Muse profusely when…
Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrooooooooooooowwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwllllllllllllllllll
Kyoko blushed in embarrassment. Her stomach never failed to keep her on-schedule.
"Don't worry. I made sure there were frogs on tonight's menu," Kuon said, as he took her hand.
He was still laughing when their names were announced at their masquerade ball.
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Kyoko and Kuon finally got to bed in the last hours before dawn. Kuon had fallen asleep quickly, his arms around Kyoko in their usual positions. Kyoko was awake, looking at her ring in the dim light from the window. It felt heavy and alien on her finger, but she had no desire to take it off.
She snuggled in under the covers to enjoy his warmth and his scent, trying not to think of how harrowing it had been for the few hours she believed he'd betrayed her. She promised herself that she'd never run away again.
The ball had been a surprise. She hadn't thought important cultural buildings could be rented, but apparently it was possible. He brought her everything and everyone she loved. Everyone was there-even Taisho and Okamisan from the Darumaya. Kuon had refused to entertain any apologies, saying "Think only of the past as its remembrance gives you pleasure."
It was wonderful, she thought, but being here with him like this is still my most favorite thing in the world.
She kissed his forehead and drifted off to sleep.
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Footnotes:
12. I indulged myself in imagining Kyoko's dress. It was inspired by a cover drawing Sensei did of her in a blue and white gown next to Ren in a prince outfit. I'll edit with the volume and chapter number eventually.
Tsujigahana is a dyeing technique that was once considered something of a 'lost art.' Tsujigahana has a very distinctive look, featuring tie-dyeing techniques (shibori) coupled with additional resist dyeing techniques (yuzen). It's been revived by a new generation of artists. It's also extremely expensive. If you look at modern kimono on places like Yahoo Japan, it's easy to find 'fake' tsujigahana furisode kimono. The real thing is much more expensive, though, given how labor intensive it is.
Itchiku Kubota is a master of the tsujigahana technique. His work is seriously worth a google search.
Aizome is the practice of indigo dyeing.
Rinzu silk is a damask silk that can be very smooth and shiny, and sometimes features a pattern woven into the fabric.
Kimono wearing, particularly in the tea ceremony setting, follows a set of rules that determine what is appropriate for the season, the age of the wearer, and the type of occasion one is attending. As someone who studied tea, Kyoko should've known that the flowers on her dress corresponded to winter. Tsubaki is the Japanese camellia and is a classic winter flower. I decided Kyoko would have silk figured with a chrysanthemum-based pattern known as muji-na-giku, which is often used on fall and winter kimono.
Surihaku is gold leaf applied to kimono via a sticky rice paste.
13. The Louboutin Kate Crystal Embellished Toe Pump, retailing at a cool $3,596. It's time Kyoko got shoes in the Sho Fuwa price bracket.
14. Phaetons are an open carriage that allows the rider to manage the horses. A closed carriage would've needed an extra person.
15. Look, I know Ryan Gosling managed to learn how to play the piano like a born jazz pianist in La La Land, but I just have Doubts as to whether or not Kuon would be able to pull off the fast bits of Fantasie Impromptu. The slow bits are easy, though.