Boilerplate Disclaimer: The various characters from the movie Zootopia are all owned by Disney the great and powerful. Any and all registered trade names property of their respective owners. Cheap shots at celebrities constitute fair usage.
Charity Begins Somewhere Else
The old television set in the corner of the First precinct's detective bullpen, set to a news station, usually served only as background noise. Detectives might watch weather forecasts, or breaking news in other parts of the city – although occasionally other segments drew attention.
"It's Fangmeyer's PSA!" someone shouted.
Several detectives abandoned paperwork to watch. "It's not a public service announcement," argued Hightower. "It's an appeal for the Remember the Victims Foundation."
"She doesn't get paid, so it's a PSA."
"... job is to arrest criminals. But that can't end the pain they've caused in the community. Families that have lost a wage earner may lose their homes. Even with insurance some animals will lose their businesses. Medical bills for long term care can take a family's savings. The arrest of criminals and their conviction isn't the whole story. The real story is that of the animals who have suffered. Please give to the Remember the Victims Foundation."
An image of a phone number and website for donations filled the screen as officers returned to their desks. The rabbit and fox had not joined those watching the appeal.
"Hey, Wilde," Detective Readover called, "when are you and Hopps going to tape a plug for Remember the Victims?"
"Nick doesn't like being in front of the camera," answered Judy.
"You two are in front of the camera all the time! The media is always filming you!"
"Doesn't mean we like it," grunted Nick.
"You promote that Annie Fund."
"A couple television stations requested interviews about the Annie Fund. Those are the only interviews we accept, and if they start wandering off topic we end the interview."
"Hey, I'm not knocking research to end children's cancer. The work you're doing is great. But you don't have to limit yourself to a single good cause. Helping victims of crime has value too. I'll bet they've asked you two to tape for them."
Judy sounded cross as she tried to answer, "You don't know what groups Nick and I–"
"Less talk, more work," bellowed Lylah Bagheera.
Nick and Jude were glad to drop the discussion. Detective Readover might have wanted to continue it. He preferred the sound of his own voice to doing paperwork. But listening to the panther was a good idea if she spoke softly and a very, very good idea if she shouted. Given the choice of paperwork or pissing off the panther, common sense dictated he finish the report on his computer.
As they drove home that evening Judy reminded her husband, "Remember the Victims has asked us to tape an appeal for them. I–"
"I don't like them."
"You don't? Why?"
"Something just doesn't smell right about them."
"You're not a wolf."
"My sense of smell is still fine. But this is more hustler's instinct. I can't tell you exactly what seems wrong, but something's off."
"They've given out some large checks."
"We've seen pictures of three, all recipients were felines."
"Is this a canid thing? Felines can be victims."
"This is not a 'canid' thing. Felines aren't the only victims in Zootopia. It doesn't strike you as odd that the only pictures we've seen are felines?"
"Not necessarily."
"Do we know the species behind Remember the Victims?"
"No. You really think there's just one species behind it?"
"Just asking the question. And how much do we know about the victims they show receiving the checks?"
"They showed pictures of the house of that one family burning."
"Okay, I believe their house burned. Not sure it was a crime or–"
"Even if the fire wasn't arson they're still homeless."
Nick sighed, "It still smells to me. If I was a rabbit who was good with figures I might get some details about money raised and where it goes."
"And if I were a suspicious fox I'd talk with the Fire Department and look for information on the crimes that affected the families who got checks. I don't know why a rabbit who's good at math has to do all the work... Oh, Nick?"
"Yes?"
"If they come out clean, we tape a promotion for them?"
"Okay." "If they come out clean."
Forms required to file for non-profit, tax-free status do not include species category. But the documents were public records and species could be checked with the Zootopia Department of Motor Vehicles.
Captain Black, at the Fire Department, frequently appeared reluctant to work with the police. It was not animosity but rather a matter of principle for the bear, who wanted a clear line of demarcation between the departments – the police shouldn't put out fires and his animals did not make arrests.
"Yes?"
"Captain Black? There's a fox out here to see you. He says to tell you he has a blueberry muffin in his bakery bag and he'll eat it if you don't talk with him."
The bear chuckled, "It's Nick Wilde, isn't it?"
"Yes, sir."
"Well send him back before he follows through on his threat."
The fox entered Black's office and handed over the muffin.
"Is this a bribe?" the bear demanded.
"I hope so. Got a couple questions. If you can give me answers it's a bribe. If you can't it's just a gift."
"I don't take gifts from the police department, or from foxes. What're your questions?"
"Fire, 673 Oak Terrace, March second, two years ago. Anything suspicious?"
The bear turned to his computer, "673 Oak Terrace?"
"Yep."
The bear nibbled the muffin as he read. "Suspicious blaze. Evidence of arson."
Nick frowned, "It isn't in the police reports."
"Don't blame me. You cops are lazy bastards."
"As contrasted with the fire animals who mostly sleep and eat in their stations while we're out fighting crime?"
"See, and we're smarter too. That's in the Third. I'll give you the names of the detectives who screwed things up if it's not in your database. Oh, and I'll give you the name of the insurance investigator too. Our report – the fire department knows how to file good reports – says they had questions."
The detectives at the Third discovered the address of the fire had been entered into the records as 637 Oak Terrace. Nick swore softly to himself, knowing Black would never let him forget the typo by the rhino. "Lousy on keyboards. Should never let a rhino type up a report," Nick thought – but had the good sense not to say it to the large officer.
The fire had seemed relatively small, and the Third very busy. The cause of the blaze was entered as arson, but the detectives had not worked it aggressively under the pressure of the Night Howler tensions in the city at the time and had essentially forgotten it.
Nick looked up the case file for the robbery for which Remember the Victims had also handed out a large check. "Detectives saw the inconsistencies in the witness statements, but couldn't get them resolved. Something wrong here... What?" The fox decided to call the company insuring the business which had been robbed and talk with the investigator who handled the case.
"Mister Splitfoot will see you now," the receptionist told Judy.
The director of the Department of Consumer Protection: Charities Unit had pulled the necessary files when Judy called and requested a meeting.
"Here are the figures you wanted," he told her, sliding a summary across his desk to the rabbit.
She glanced at them and instantly noted, "Their overhead seems awfully high, and the disbursement very low."
"True," Splitfoot sighed. "Sadly it costs a lot of money to raise any money."
The rabbit raised an eyebrow.
"Let's consider your Annie Fund, you–"
"I don't think Nick and I consider the Annie Fund ours, we set it up, but–"
"For purposes of my illustration it's yours. You're outstanding in terms of the percentage of funds raised going toward your cause. In the great scheme of things you don't raise a lot of money. Your workers–"
"Are largely volunteers: family and friends of families who have lost children to cancer."
"The point is that you don't raise piles of money because you don't spend much money on advertising and promotion. You could raise more money if you promoted it more aggressively."
"Which would take money."
"Yes, it would."
"And mean we were actually turning less money over to research."
"Maybe. Maybe not. Let's say you spent fifty-percent of your budget on promotion. You'd be giving fifty-percent to research instead of the ninety-three percent you give now, but if the advertising tripled the amount of donations you'd be giving more."
"Remember the Victims is spending a lot more than fifty-percent of their funds on raising money and salaries."
Splitfoot shrugged, "Sadly, they're not alone in that. And I'll certainly admit they are pushing the legal limit in terms of overhead. Their advertising expenses, rent, and administrative salaries are right at the limit of what is acceptable."
"Would you call it borderline fraud?"
"No, I would not. They are at the margin of acceptable practice, but they are still within the boundaries established by the city council."
Judy was silent for a minute. Nick was right. Something smelled bad. "Can I keep this report?"
"Certainly. But please remember what I told you – they spend a lot raising funds but they are within legal boundaries. And my opinion is that a charity trying to help the victims of crime is a good thing."
"I certainly agree with you," Judy assured him. "But if this is a scam I want to see the thieves prosecuted."
"This is legal?" Nick asked in disbelief as Judy explained the figures. "I mean, I'm just a dumb fox, but more than ninety-percent of what they raise isn't helping anyone except themselves. Are these figures legit?"
"They are legit, as far as they go. And it is less than ten percent that they've given out, but they are within the boundaries of a legal charity. They're pushing the edge of legality, but they're legal."
"Please tell me you're not going to say I was wrong and we should tape a promo for them."
"No way. My nose isn't as good as yours – but they're starting to sound bad to my ears."
"Back up, you said as far as the figures go they look legit. Do my pointy red ears detect a suspicion of something wrong with the figures?"
"Not the figures themselves. I'm now wondering about the company producing their advertising, and the company handling printing and distribution of literature, and the company running–"
"Oh, you're good. And you can get–"
"I don't have time, and neither do you. We took a day off to run this down – it'll take days to get the necessary background."
"You're not suggesting we drop it, are you? 'Cause I got some information that may bust them."
"I wasn't suggesting dropping it. The ZPD has some forensic accountants who can chase this down faster than I can. What do you have? Can we go to the DA with it? That will be faster than the accountants... Nick, I want that bunch out of business. They aren't even honest thieves holding someone up with a gun. They're stealing money from animals who want to help the victims of crime. Their donors are victims – and it's more injury to other victims of crime."
"Innocent until proven guilty, remember?"
"You don't really–"
"I'm sure they're guilty. I'm just... Okay, this won't get me a warrant from the DA. But I talked with the detectives handling the so-called crimes that–"
"So-called?"
"Probably faked, so they could be labeled as victims of crime and get a hefty check from Remember the Victims. They're related. Got the insurance investigator working with the detectives at the Third – it had gone into cold case file over there. Fire department may get involved too. They may be able to put together a a case for arson and insurance fraud within a week. If the forensic accountant can get anything we can shut them down fast."
"Good!"
"Uh, Judy?"
"Yes, Love of my Life?"
"There is a forensics accounting unit?"
The rabbit sighed, "Sometimes I wonder how you made detective."
"Riding the tail of the rabbit who saved the city." Nick leered at his wife. "I love riding your–"
"Dinner first, Hot Stuff."
The DA's office was crowded: half a dozen detectives, two insurance investigators, a hippo from the fire department – who could almost crowd a room by himself – and an accountant.
"I've filed charges of insurance fraud this morning," the badger told them. The crowd did not react in a happy manner.
"Those kickbacks are fraud!" insisted the accountant.
"Insurance fraud, but not arson charges?" protested a detective.
The DA raised his hand and received a grudging moment of silence. "I'm not saying I won't file more charges. This is the start. And I may need a little more evidence on a couple of these things to have a hope of conviction. I'm not allowed to say any animal is stupid – but some juries are. Some of this is technical enough I can see a defense lawyer confusing a jury. And expert witnesses can put a jury to sleep. In fraud cases some juries want us to prove intent – and that's damn hard to prove. Some animal will claim, 'Oops, I didn't know I had to report that.' There'll be a much higher chance of conviction if I can turn a couple of the defendants. Show them what the pending charges are and suggesting that cooperation will be taken into account when we recommend a sentence to the judge."
The accountant was not placated, "This is proof! Proof of fraud!"
"And most of them will claim they knew nothing about the book-keeping or other details and had no idea of the problem. You don't think the accountant was the only one who knew what was going on, do you?"
"Of course not," snorted the peccarie.
"And I agree, but I may have trouble trying to prove it without a confession of other animals that they knew what was happening. This isn't my first prosecution. Trust me. By this afternoon the police will have made their first arrests, the Consumer Protection Charities Unit will yank their non-profit status, and the animals in custody will get a look at further possible charges."
"And their lawyers will tell them to shut up," grumbled a police detective.
"Maybe," agreed the DA. "Let's see if they have one lawyer who's going to handle everything or if they have individual lawyers. 'Cause if they have individual attorneys those lawyers will know it's in the best interests of their clients to spill their guts as early as possible. After this hits the evening news we may even have some of the lower downs turning themselves in and promising us information."
The animals present seemed to realize the DA knew his job better than they did. "Okay, you know best," a detective from the Third admitted.
"The evidence you've put together here is great. It'll be nice to take these frauds down. Which of you got this organized?"
"Uh, that was Detectives Hopps and Wilde, from the First."
"Why aren't they here?"
"They got the ball rolling, and got us connected with each other. It all fell into place with improved communication."
"My question was where are they?"
"Nick said we're the ones who did the work, and deserved the credit. He didn't want the media taking pictures of the two of them and ignoring us."
The DA picked up and folder and considered it, then let it drop on his desk with a satisfying thud. "Well, you certainly did a ton of work. If Nick wanted to keep his name out I'll respect that. I'll let you know if I need anything else from any of you."
"When will it go to trial?" asked the accountant.
"That's for the judge. I'll let you know. You aren't the only one I may need as an expert witness."
The other animals filed out of the badger's office.
The DA leaned back in his chair and tapped his pencil on his desk calendar. The animals who had been in his office had done the work on the case. But nothing conclusive had happened in two years until Nick and Judy got them together. Perhaps the fox simply thought the animals who had done the spade work deserved credit for their efforts. The DA smiled, the fox also knew how to get animals to cooperate – as the DA knew first hand. The animals who gathered the evidence would help Nick and Judy if the pair ever asked them again. The two motives were not incompatible, maybe it was both. Perhaps there was some social dynamics in the First bullpen that made Judy and Nick wish to downplay their own role. But the DA had a strong suspicion it might reflect what Judy had once admitted, "I love Nick passionately, but he'll do anything to avoid writing reports."