Dimension Distorter: Chapter 8. We're getting close to chapter 10 and the real meat of this story. Heh...meat. Ahem, this has got to be one of the most fever-dream collabs that we're actually making official, but I'm glad that we're both showing it so much care. I can't wait to see what comes out of this in the end; how about you? Can you estimate how long this story is going to go for?
FS Vula'Purrfectest: Guess who's back, back again~!? I am my friend~! And yes, I most certainly can… 75 chapters, each chapter containing an average of 20K words, give or take. That's my estimate, but it could be a lot bigger and may only represent the first book in an entire series. The pacing of these last few chapters has been somewhat slow, given that we've spent several already in a stationary, albeit God-tier location. However, that changes now, and the pacing will only continue to pick up as we get to this story's actual meat and two vegs. Dammit, dude, see what you did there with your innuendos and suggestive statements?! You're too convincingly profound for your own good, so running with it is an irresistible allure I can't help but give in to the urge of… ghehehehehe.
Dimension Distorter: Heh, well, who do you think I got that shit from? You, dummy, lol. You and your innuendos just got me doing them. Also, 75 chapters!? Damn! I mean, I'm unsure if one of my stories will reach that length, but it's not impossible! I'm more on the side of getting as much packed into a chapter with proper pacing, but if it turns out that long, I won't complain either. And I'm glad we're at the point where we're no longer going to stay stationary. So, you ready?
FS Vula'Purrfectest: I'm a high-baller by nature. It's entirely possible I'm overestimating how big our story will be upon its completion and more than likely. However, I'm optimistic about our chances of actually making it that big. Besides, thinking big is what I do best. And yes, mate, I was born ready, dude! Let's rock this joint!
Chapter 8: Evolving Experiences
(Stephan)
"Man, it's weird how something so mundane can seem so new."
I blinked as I looked at Carly, sitting across from me. She was smiling as she was sipping on orange juice through a straw while eating some breakfast. Currently, we were at a Starbucks, where, relatively, we haven't been to in a very, very long time. Weeks? Months in that mansion? After the two of us learned fine-tuned control of our abilities before Thomas and Gwen did, we chose to spend some time together outside. Just as normal humans. After the ordeal of learning not to break things and being in that false New York, the natural world wasn't a bad get-away.
Heh. Getting away from a literally perfect mansion? Never thought I'd say that.
"Actually, you've got a great point. When you eat and drink the best food you can ever have, eating at a Starbucks is just...I don't know. It's both meh...and relieving." I said as I ate a few donuts myself. Human or not, my appetite is still really high. Same as hers, but she had more control over herself. Carly giggled as she kept eating, and it made me smile at her. Seeing her happy like this still made me feel great.
"So, after we're done eating breakfast, what else do ya wanna do!?" She asked excitedly.
"Heh, what's with all the energy, Carly?"
"Well, why wouldn't I be!?" She smiled and looked around, ensuring other people didn't listen to our conversation. "I mean, we've got these freaking awesome powers and everything! I know that I wanted to have a day of being 'normal,' but we're still super-Pokemon-powered. Anything you wanna do with that?"
I sipped my coffee, well, my third cup of coffee, and thought about it. I smirked and shrugged. "Well, we don't need to do anything extravagant, but I have an idea. Let's practice the more mundane things of our abilities. Like our hearing capabilities and other senses. Superman has the right idea in some areas."
A sudden shout had someone tripping over beside our table and sending his giant cup of steaming hot pumpkin spice espresso all over Carly. The whole thing seemed to happen in slow motion, as the man was already apologizing profusely before we could process anything. "I'm so, so sorry, miss! It was an accident, I swear!" Confusion marred my features as I saw it was a gigantic man with his features obscured by some kind of strange rainbow magician's cloak. Beyond that, nothing else was visible except the shadowy outline of his face and his obvious largeness. Seriously, the dude had to be 7' tall. He quickly provided us with some paper towels and fumbled around awkwardly like some bumbling idiot.
"Bro, fuckin…!" I exclaimed, but Carly held out her hand and took the towels.
"I-It's fine, Stephan! It's alright." She began to use the towels on her shirt. "I-I mean it doesn't burn. I mean, I still feel it, but it doesn't hurt." She didn't manage to get it off course, but she smiled at the man. Of course, she had to stand up to clean her front. "Thank you, sir. Accidents happen."
I narrowed my eyes at the sight of this tall dude in that cloak. It didn't take me being a genius to realize that people who dress like that definitely aren't from around here. And I'm sure we all know what I mean by that. And that height? Literally too freakish to be human. Hell, everyone was giving him looks, but no one was staring at him for too long once they stared long enough. I think Carly noticed my suspicious expression and puckered lips because she smiled at me.
"It's okay...right?"
I blinked and sighed. I took her wet towels and gave her more from the table. Well, they were napkins on the table but still. "Yeah...it's fine. I'm not upset." She gave me a knowing smirk, seeing through my bullshit. I just shrugged and looked at the tall dude. "Thanks for...trying to fix your accident. It's alright if my girlfriend isn't mad, so there's no need for me to be Rainbow."
I was surprised when he appeared to be genuinely nervous and reclusive, like he'd rather be anywhere than stuck in this situation but glad he was able to try fixing his accident. "Whew, thank goodness! It does me a world of good to know my blunder hasn't upset you two. I swear, I'm not normally this clumsy, far from it. I don't know what happened, probably some gods of mischief having fun at my expense, as they tend to enjoy doing as of late. It's all in good fun, though, and at least nobody was hurt, well, not really. Still, I'm glad you're both so accommodating. I'm new in town and planned to join the magician's convention, hence my outfit. I really hope I didn't spoil the good mood between you two. The last thing I'd ever want is to intrude on the precious, stolen pockets of love and perfection between two people in love." He replied in one of the kindest, most painfully shy voices I've ever heard in my life.
Lord, my eye twitched. His voice mixed with that shy tone was freaking adorable. I shouldn't have thought that way, but I definitely couldn't help it. Carly was just gushing at him and his reclusive factor. "Oh, that's amazing! We haven't been in New York for long, so I didn't know of a magician's convention!"
I gathered up the trash and dumped it away while she continued to speak with this otherworlder. Coming back, I tapped Carly on the shoulder as an idea came to me. "Hey, babe...you said you wanted to do something 'special,' right?"
She blinked and glanced at this hooded guy and then back to me. "Um...yeah, but right now?"
I shrug. "Magic man can join us, and maybe he can show us some tricks before he heads to the convention." I look at the dude. "Maybe Rainbow here can come with us, and we can check out the city a bit more. I'm sure he can keep up.
Rainbow, if possible, got even cuter with how flustered my suggestion made him. "What?! Are you guys sure?! I mean, I don't want to be an imposition!" He shook his head randomly at himself. "No, you know what, I'd love to join you guys. Someone very wise once told me that I should try branching out, meeting new people, and not feeling as though I'm burdensome to others so much. And like she's always telling me, most people don't offer to let someone accompany them if they had an issue with it in the first place. So, yeah, if you guys will have me along, then consider me part of your entourage for the time being. I'm not exactly busy right now, and was sent here as a sort of lesson, a rite of passage if you will."
"Uh-oh," Carly said, arms behind her back as she leaned forward a bit, "was it your girl who told you that~? You should listen to her if it was~."
I scoffed and shook my head a bit. "Not to mention, I've decided that I think you're cute, Rainbow. I like cute boys."
Carly laughed as she took one of his hands. "Uh-oh, once Stephan thinks things like that, consider yourself never leaving his sight." I scoffed and walked out of the Starbucks with her laughing and pulling him along.
"Oh, get off of it. I like adorable, shy boys. No matter how big they are, it's a weak point of mine. Now let's find a place where other people can't see us or any cameras." In New York, it honestly wasn't hard to find an alley with no one there. There had to have been hundreds or even thousands of them. Once we were in one of them, I looked at them both, and Carly looked at me strangely.
"Wait, we're really going to be using them like…."
"Yeah, we're using them like that."
Rainbow, for his part, seemed genuinely confused. "Um, forgive my befuddlement, but what are we using these alleyways for, exactly? Aren't there better places for me to show you some magic? Cuz I've been working on this epic card trick recently, and I like to think it's a real show-stopper."
...Okay, no. He was too fucking cute. I hated it, but I couldn't deny it. How different he was from Daddy and Aiyanna was palpable. "No, no, by 'them' we meant our abilities. By 'like that,' I meant like this!": I bent down and jumped up at the same time I transformed into my Gengar self before backflipping up to a 4-story roof. I grinned and leaned over the top as the wind wavered through my fur. "How about you show us that magic of yours while we tour the city, Rainbow!? Lotsa huge places to not be seen and have fun at the same time!"
"Oh! Does he have powers too, then!?" Carly called out, and she transformed into a Lopunny before leaping up beside me to the building.
"He's got more than just powers, babe, and he's a really special boi," I said while I gave a Gengar grin.
Rainbow, for his part, seemed genuinely shocked by our display and backed away slowly. "You're both Pokemon… Okay, I didn't see that one coming. But I'm confused. What makes you think I have powers as well?"
I smirked. Honestly, I was interested. This one wasn't trying to flaunt himself. He was honestly trying to hide who he was and his capabilities. I think I liked this cutie more and more! We need more of this type! I sat on the edge and swung my legs a tad. "The Ultra-Verse, the Omega Omnisphere, we know it all. And though your work at staying incognito is commendable...two words of advice. Humans aren't 7ft tall...and wearing rainbow clothes is very conspicuous. I don't know who you are, Rainbow, but you aren't human. What are you exactly? An Omeigon? An Omnidony? I can't tell, but you're somewhere in that range, Rainbow. I don't exactly care, and I wasn't lying about wanting to have some fun with you...but I want you to be yourself around the two of us, at least, a little bit."
He looked like he was thinking of any number of rebuttals to my argument, up until I mentioned wanting him to be himself around the two of us. That seemed to be the tipping point for him as he removed the hood to his cloak, revealing a perfectly sculpted face of absolute masculine beauty, iridescent gold skin, equally iridescent hair darker than black holes, and a shy, uncertain look on his face. His eyes were rainbow as well, forever solidifying his nickname in my eyes. "For the record, I was prepared to bring up basketball players being 7' tall and remind you that I already explained the purpose of my cloak back at the coffee shop. I was going to stubbornly refuse to tell you about who and what I am until you both said you wanted me to be comfortable in my skin around you. Mentioning your knowledge of the Omega Omnisphere wouldn't have swayed me. Lots of your kind have been aware of our existence throughout the ages, even if they don't always know us by our true names." He paused for a moment to offer us both a hesitant smile.
"Call me Gimmickiest Appaneesty or just Rainbow is fine since you've taken a liking to that. As for what I am, that's not something I'm ready to reveal to you guys just yet. I can tell you this, I am neither an Omnidony nor an Omeigon. I'm something more. I have some indirect correlation to them, but I am not one of them. It's very nice to meet you both. I've never personally known humans who knew about the Omnidonae and Omeigons, but I have heard stories about them. I suppose even the chanciest of encounters can have a place in one's destiny, not that any aspect of predestination applies to us. I find this situation strangely exciting! I hope we can get along!" He said with a perfect smile and a 75-degree bow.
If what I remember from Thomas was correct, then a bow from a Supreme Omnidony was considered a denotation of absolute respect. Of course, this guy said he wasn't one of them, so maybe his views on such matters were different. I was lying on my side with my head in my hand by this point.
"You can be whatever you wanna be, but you still talk circles to the point where I'll just nod and agree. So, Rainbow, can we go on that city-wide tour now? I promise to have you back home before 7." I gave a smirk based on my species and floated to my feet. Honestly, I had no fucking idea that it was another version of Appaneesty that I never heard of. Man, his skin really was gold. No wonder he did his best to hide. He was a wonder to stare at, like how Aiyanna was but in an adorable male sort of way.
Carly waved down to him. "Yeah, it'll be fun! Like super fun! Let's go, Gimly!" Seemed like that was her own nickname for him. Gimly and Rainbow both sound cute to me.
Rainbow, or Gimly, offered us both a sheepish smile. "I'd love to join you guys. Lead the way."
"Hell, yeah!" We both exclaimed before he turned and began to run and leap across the rooftops.
"Come on, you ninnies! Keep up if you can!" He called out to us over his shoulder with playful amusement, already several skyscrapers ahead of us and growing ever-smaller to our enhanced eyes. The pure, unadulterated, childlike joy he exhibited being able to be himself around other people only made him that much cuter to me.
"Jeez, he's already so far ahead! Didn't he tell us to lead!? Man!" Carly exclaimed as we leaped from roof to roof. I laughed and glanced at her.
"You shouldn't try and outpace him because we won't be able to. If he wants to fly ahead of us, he will, and we can't stop that! Let's also use this as a form of training and see how much we can pace ourselves going at top-speed!" At that moment, there were two sonic booms as we kicked it into high gear. I still chose not to fly to get more practice using my body, but we could leap and run fast to the point where it seemed like flying.
To our shock, Rainbow reappeared right beside us, matching our pace with a surprisingly cheeky grin etched on his face. Clasping one of our wrists with one of his hands each, he pulled a Sonic Heroes on us and blitzed forward at speeds way beyond our current capabilities, dragging us along for the thrill ride to end all thrill rides.
(Thomas)
It didn't take Gwen and I too long to fine-tune our control with Annasteeliest helping us so ardently. Only about a week or so in this megamansion's time, and given that it ran on a significantly faster time stream than the outside world, Stephan and Carly had probably only been enjoying themselves for a scant few moments at best. Annasteeliest had become something of a permanent fixture in our lives in that distended temporal continuum. Aiyanna and Aggron, or Daddy as my old buddy Stephan likened him to, had left everything to us for the time being.
They'd returned to their lives and existences as Supreme Omnidonae full-time, discussing something about Future System Yancinaeku and the need to warn the others that she'd returned. Honestly, I couldn't see what all the fuss was about; she seemed like an absolute sweetheart from the times I'd interacted with her in my dreams, and flawless coordination and precise control were as much her powers as they were theirs. Indeed, she could keep from destroying everything just as quickly as Aiyanna and the other Supreme Omnidonae could, if not even more so. So, why were they so on edge with her being around again? Didn't they trust her not to destroy the entire ZOF just by flexing her cute little toes? Or was it something more than just her presence here?
Ahem, but I suppose I'm getting off track. Aiyanna was back with my Neo Self, who was the only lover she had beside her Daddy and Yancy IC2 that was blessed by the Unquantifiable Eternal Bonding Phenomena. I supposed that made the connection they shared all the more extra special, though it did surprise me that she'd just up and left with promises to return as soon as possible. I'd grown somewhat accustomed to her presence here. Oh well, at least her and Aggy's daughter was great company and an excellent sparring partner for Gwen and me. She was every bit the unbreakable wall that her Aggron father was, and with Sovereign variants of Pure Power, Huge Power, Contrary, Filter, Anger Point, and fuck knows what else, she was an absolute monster offensively as well.
After demonstrating my newfound control and finesse for the umpteenth time by shooting NightShade lasers from my eyes to carve a pumpkin into a jack-o-lantern, Gwen and I decided enough was enough, and the time had come for us to follow Carly and Stephan's example and make our way back into the real world. But first, I had two gorgeous girls waiting for me to share a picnic with them by the ocean-sized indoor pool and beach with sand as white as snow. A giant beach blanket had been provided for us with sufficient enough space to let all three of us lay down and sunbathe under the artificial sun.
"Thomas, hurry up and join us! I'm starving!" Gwen shouted out to me as I made my way over to her. She and I were in our human forms for the first time in what felt like ages, and I have to admit it was nice being back in my old and familiar body. Don't get me wrong, being a Gengar was fantastic, but not if it meant losing touch with everything that made me human. Many people saw only the super and not the man, but this was a folly.
I was buck-ass naked with not a trace of swim trunks or any other sort of threads. Ten percent of my powers as a Gengar carried over in this form, so I was never powerless and graciously welcomed the nice 6-pack abs and large pecs I was sporting. My dick and balls were more significant and very, very full. Being what I am was incredible. Even if my abilities were somewhat muted when I was like this, it was still impressive. I could still easily bench press hundreds of skyscrapers stacked on top of each other.
Yes, I had verified this unquestionably by testing it in the very convincing replica of New York City Aggron had created for our finesse training needs. Seriously, this place could make nearly any environment or inanimate object for us to use, only limited by the scope of our imagination. However, this place's main limitation was its inability to create actual life. Sure, mannequins and other mimicries were possible, as were surprisingly realistic practice dummies. However, creating true thinking, breathing, sentient beings with emotions and souls was beyond this house's capabilities. Granted, I was far from cut up about it and made this beach and my training pumpkins for me to practice on while strutting my stuff. Oh yeah, a fun little tidbit for y'all, animals and other lifeforms were off-limits, as were inorganic life forms; however, animal and plant-based products and food were perfectly fine. That's why pumpkins were not off-limits.
It's not like Gwen hadn't already seen me nude thousand times, and with how quickly Annasteeliest had hit it off with our awesome twosome, she was no more embarrassed by this display than the beautiful brunette. Speaking of Gwen, she was clad in a modest yet still sexy two-piece swimsuit, with just a tiny bit of midriff teasing at the illustrious figure contained within. Her perfect Pokemon physiology had enhanced her attributes to peak but still humanly feasible conditions, and she looked more supermodel-tier than ever.
Her c-cup breasts had rounded out and assumed a far more alluring shape and buoyancy, and her already athletic frame and strong, sexy core were even more so now. The fact she was one-week pregnant was not enough for it to show yet, but pregnancy tests we'd asked the house to provide for us had confirmed she was indeed expecting, much to her immense joy. I had to kiss Gwen hard to stop her excited squealing from giving our surprise for Stephan and Carly away when the test came back positive. A massive, overwhelming surge of emotions hit me as I thought about the Ralts egg incubating very snugly inside my girlfriend's womb, and I couldn't help but bring her into a heated kiss as I joined her and Annasteeliest on the giant beach blanket. Gwen's eyes popped open for a second but slowly slinked back shut as she leaned into the kiss, and we fell onto the blanket together with me on top and her pinned gently beneath me.
Speaking of Annasteeliest, she was naked as well and lying belly-down on the blanket with her Aggron tail and ears wagging cutely at our display of affection. Her ass-length, lilac-colored hair- with its silvery, steel-colored highlights- ran like a curtain down her exposed backside, a cascading waterfall serving as a backdrop to her mouthwatering curves, dips, contours, and flawless peach skin. Every inch of her glorious body was perfectly sculpted and picturesque in its divine symmetry. Indeed, hers was a body worthy of the level of worship a Supreme Omnidony Goddess so readily garnered in countless civilizations. Her ass was the perfect nexus point of jiggly and steeliest rigidity, and her legs were hairless and shaped to such an immaculate level that the most skillful of dancers and idols would be green with envy. She didn't have the same glittering aura of lilac transcendent beauty that Aiyanna used to somehow enhance her Anime-perfectest gorgeousness even further, but then again, she didn't need it.
She caught me staring at her in admiration and offered me a cheeky wink, making me blush and turn my undivided attention back to Gwen and the delectable spread before us. There were sandwiches, cheese and meat slices of all kinds, and fruit punch juice boxes all held in a giant cooler with never-melting ice cubes contained within it. There was also food that was better served hot such as freshly microwaved, no-name-brand pepperoni and bacon pizza pops, juicy jumbo hot dogs wrapped in oven-baked biscuits with melted cheese strings inside the split wieners, and of course- since we were in Thunder Bay- we had several Baker's dozens worths of Persians.
"Say ahhhh!" Gwen giggled in an adorable voice, holding out a forkful of pizza pop for me as I grinned and took it in my mouth, fulfilling a long-time fantasy of mine where my girlfriend and I would feed each other. I blushed in between mouthfuls and chewed methodically, hoping I wasn't eating too grossly. She opened her mouth and closed her eyes as I returned the favor, and with trembling hands, I guided a piece of my own pizza pops into her waiting maw. She closed her mouth around it and began chewing it with a cute little smile as I removed the fork and watched her eat. Damn, she was way more dainty and delicate about how she ate compared to me; it was oddly endearing to watch.
"Uggh, you two are sickeningly sweet, you know that?!" Annasteeliest giggled teasingly from beside us as Gwen, and I pulled away from each other with shy smiles, the moment popping like a soap bubble as the lilac-haired beauty with Aggron features decided to indulge another of my fantasies.
"Hey, why don't you come over here and apply some sunscreen over my backside? Oh, and… maybe give me a nice massage while you're at it." She suggested flirtatiously as I gulped and my eyes bugged out. Damn, this girl was an even bigger minx than her mother. Still, I didn't deny her request and strolled over to her as Gwen's eyebrows furrowed in confusion.
"But wait, why do you even need sunscreen? Also, how is Thomas supposed to give you a meaningful massage; he doesn't exactly have the dexterity to match your infinite muscle density?" She idly wondered, and Annasteeliest snorted mirthfully.
"I don't, but it'll be a nice bonding experience for us. I can think of another type of skin cream Thomas could apply to my backside instead, if you'd rather he do that. As for my muscles, while they're denser than the densest black holes and harder than the steeliest Nuclear Pasta, they're also incredibly malleable in the right hands, and strength has nothing to do with it." She chortled as Gwen and I both blushed at the very obvious innuendo hidden none-too-subtly in her words.
Deciding it would be best to refrain from indulging myself in another threesome with these two girls, I opted to not rise to Annasteeliest's bait and lathered my hands with the disgustingly slimy substance known as sunscreen. Uggh, being autistic meant that certain textures caused me substantial sensory issues, and slimy tactualities were definitely among the worst of the worst. My Gengar physiology mitigated it in some ways and made it a thousand times worse in others. The things I do for love and lust, seriously.
Annasteeliest and Gwen both smiled at me in admiration as I did what I always did and compartmentalized my deep-rooted textural issues for the sake of my loved ones. And so, I began a steady and sensual massage session that had rendered Annasteeliest as putty in my hands. Seriously, how could someone's muscles be so incredibly hard yet soft at the same time; it was the curiousest of sensations. Her skin was smoother than a baby's bottom, which more than made up for the sensory issues caused by the lotion I was rubbing up and down her back, asscheeks, and legs. The way she moaned and became practically boneless at my gentle, loving caress and the way her cold, sheeny metal tail wrapped itself around my waist in her soothing ecstasy, well, it made it very hard to concentrate on keeping this strictly as a massage. I had to literally will myself not to pop a boner, and from the way, Gwen was breathing erratically behind me, I could tell she was faring no better.
"Oh God, you're going to make me cum just from a fucking massage!" Annasteeliest gasped, my name escaping her full, perfect lips, in short, fractured murmurs. Well, shit, there went any chance of me not hardening to full mast. Gwen had crawled over to my backside as well and leaned up against me with her bikini-clad breasts squishing against my shoulder blades.
"Ladies, please. As much as I want this, I feel it would be a better idea to regroup with Stephan and Carly. I really want to spring my last surprise on them and feel like that's been delayed for enough chapters of our story as it is." I tried half-heartedly protesting, knowing it would be in vain with the way Annasteeliest was squeezing my hard-on between her ass cheeks, and Gwen was tongue-kissing my pulse point while tweaking my nipples between her thumbs and index fingers. Holy shit that felt amazing. Annasteeliest didn't grind me with her impromptu assjob so much as she sent deep, thrumming pulsations of pure Ultra ZOF-Energy resonating through every muscle fiber contained in her ass, and those vibrations, in turn, were what stimulated me. It was like tantric, pure energy sex taken to a whole new level.
I tried to hold back, but as many of my fellow libidinous males knew, the more you tried to delay your orgasm, the quicker it burned metaphorical holes through your urethra. Oh, fucking Christ, the way Annasteeliest was squeezing me with her ass cheeks, the fucking impossibly hard and soft muscles of her glutes, and the way she vibrated them ever so slightly… that in tandem with Gwen's ministrations felt impossibly good. My end came in a flash flood of sensations that caused my vision to fade into white, and I arched backward into Gwen's chest as I came buckets, and buckets, and buckets all over Annasteeliest's ass, backside, hair, and the back of her neck. My jizz shot past her for several yards, painting our beach blanket an off-white that almost matched the surrounding sand.
Gwen supported all of my weight with ridiculous ease as I came undone, and my legs gave out from underneath me, my penis twitching inside of Annasteeliest's P-Spot Dimension as she gave a cry of jubilation and lady sprayed thousands of times literally. The blanket and much of the surrounding sand were sodden with her love juices as I applied my own personal sunscreen to her. Gwen somehow managed to cum just from the sight and smell of our combined musk, her Gardevoir instincts, and emotions going into overdrive even in her human form.
Annasteeliest recovered first even though she came more intensely and more times than both of us combined, which was expected. But still, it was a humbling reminder of how far we still had to go. She looked back at me with a cheeky grin, wiggling her ass in the air with my dick still held fast inside her P-Spot Dimension. "What was that you were saying about regrouping now, Tommy-boy?" She smirked as I sighed in defeat, knowing when to surrender and answer the oldest call of nature there was.
The sound of an all-pervasive doorbell ringing stopped us from immediately going for round two, causing us all to pause. Even Annasteeliest seemed surprised and flustered, not to mention more than a little annoyed at being blue-balled.
"Is there… someone at the door?" Gwen asked the question at the back of our minds. As though programmed for this exact scenario, the megamansion displaced the unrealness of our indoor beach and other impossibilities with regular guest bedrooms and other things befitting a beautiful, if the completely ordinary palace-sized house.
We both looked questioningly at Annasteeliest, who shrugged. "I wasn't expecting anyone here any more than you guys were, and no, I can't sense who or what they are, which is really weird. Even Slayer Lukee's Aaarty has a presence, one that leaves traces no matter how hard she tries to hide it, but whoever is at the door is a total null spot in my Omni Senses. I would strongly advise proceeding with caution, you two. It could be that girl from beyond the OIC2 System that my mom and daddy were so worried about." My interest peaked at the mention of FS Yancinaeku. Had she decided to throw all caution to the wind and grace us with her presence in the waking world? Could she have recalibrated her precision and finesse to such a degree in so short a time? Somehow, I didn't think so. I couldn't explain it, but this felt to me like it might be something else. Perhaps it was my intuition as The Author, but even infinitely distended time couldn't have created the conditions needed for FS Yancinaeku to rein in her powers for compatibility with our existence so swiftly.
"Well, there's only one way to find out, right?" I said with a maniacal gleam in my eyes, prompting both girls to stare at me like I'd lost my marbles. Keh, where was their sense of fun?! I warped to the front door via the Teleport move I'd Mimicked from Gwen, grinning widely as I threw open the entrance to greet whoever awaited me on the other side with reckless abandon. Gwen and Annasteeliest hung back, the latter hiding her tail and Aggron ears away and replacing the last with normal human ears, the both of them silently contemplating what Pandora's pithos I was about to unleash upon our unsuspecting world with this decision.
Unbeknownst to me, FS Yancinaeku began nursing a sudden cosmic migraine over in System 2 while she and another, much more potent version of me kissed beneath the rainbow starlight. The sight that greeted my eyes was… utterly phantasmagorical. A girl of such breathtaking beauty that Annasteeliest was quite plain by comparison stood arched in the open door's frame with a radiant smile. The first thing that my eyes beheld in awe and wonder was her glowing, LED-style hair that flashed in infinite hues, shades, and intensities of iridescent white. That utterly breathtaking curtain of hair fell down to her ass so ridiculously stick-straight I almost couldn't resist the urge to run my hands through it.
Another thing about her that stood out was her outfit. Seriously, where do these guys get these kickass, gaudiest fashion designs?! She was wearing an Omni-chromatic sequin kimono cape with iridescent, goldest-gold fringing overtop her arms and shoulders, with an equally irised gold, one-piece bikini serving as her underlying outfit. It had a full belly cutout, and fuck, what a belly she had, what a core. Saying she had the perfectest beyond perfectest (infinite times over) waistline and the creatural wasplike figure would've failed to do her justice most spectacularly.
Her smile was beyond anything I could ever have hoped to imagine as she beamed at us most ultraluminously, our speech collectively failing us as we got a good look at her. Seeing our stunned expressions, she giggled and decided to speak up for us. "Heyo, it's greatliest amazeballs to make your acquaintance- my story's future author- and hi to you two in the back as well! Call me Gimmickiest Uhly'Opia or whatever short form or pet name suits your flightiest fancy. I do believe your friends have made off like Purloins with a rather distractible, Absolutest Eternal Bond Mate of mine and would graciously accept your assistance to track him down if you would be so kind."
(Stephan)
Okay, holy fuck, what a RUSH! I'VE NEVER EVER moved at that speed before! The moment Rainbow had grabbed our paws, we were just gone. We visited literally every fucking establishment in New York. And I don't mean just Brooklyn, but also Manhattan and Queens. Granted, it's not like we actually used those facilities, just checking them out but now they were all in mine and Carly's memory banks, so we can never forget them. We can go to those places whenever we want! But, in a way, it kinda does suck. I wanted us to show Rainbow around a bit, and he did it for us. I'm glad, but, in a way, I wish he didn't imply he didn't know where was what. He was the guest, so he shouldn't have felt obligated, but the deed was done, and we were sitting on a bench, eating ice cream. We watched as large ships tooted their horns and sailed by in the distance.
Definitely delivering some form of cargo. Now that Carly and I were back to our human bodies and no longer moving at impossible speed, our minds caught back up, and we could fully appreciate the scale of the three-part city once again.
"Well...that was interesting," Carly said. She had a bowl of vanilla ice cream while I had strawberry-cherry. By which, I mean there are cherry bits in the strawberry and, like any god from the Ultra-Verse or, I guess, Rainbow had a large bowl with a scoop of everything even beyond that. Guess none of them do anything halfway. He was back to wearing that large eye-sore cloak with his hood up, but it was interesting to see him eat ice cream. The spoon went under his hood, and you don't even see his mouth all that much, as that would imply seeing his unreal skin tone.
"Yeah...and a bit too fast. But it was still pretty fun, I admit it." I said as I ate my own ice cream once more. "It wasn't supposed to be some kinda race though, Rainbow, and only intended to take our time around Brooklyn while making you feel comfortable around us."
Somehow, a bead of sweat gathered at the side of Rainbow's head outside of his hood. "I… um… I mean, I wasn't trying to race or anything. I'm not all that competitive by nature, at least not usually. I wanted to give you guys a bit of a peek into life in my fastest lane, I guess. I… want you to feel comfortable around me too." He stammered and stuttered in an awkward, bumbling tone as he bowed to us several times over in profound apologies. "I'm so sorry, though! I never intended to ruin you guys' tour guide session. I've actually been to New York before, or at least my own version of it. I guess I just wanted to see for myself what might've been different about this one, and… um… the ability to perceive everything around me in FR UOSCPUSOFC level USOF-Cardinal relativistic eternities is… a bit of a drag, quite literally, actually. Granted, I'm not usually that impatient, but when I get excited..." He stopped, letting the sentence hang as he apologized one last time.
Carly and I were listening intently, and I was ready to say that he didn't do anything wrong...until he threw that acronym out into the aether. We both blinked before she turned to me and then back at him. I just chose to eat my ice cream.
"Um...w-what...what again? I think we got lost on that acronym. And what's this about cardinals? Like...the bird or...you know what? I don't think that's what you mean." She said with a dorky chuckle and rubbing the back of her neck.
"Amazingly, that told us both everything and nothing at the same time," I said, still facing the ocean.
Whatever of his mouth we could see offered us a sheepish smile. "It's not really important what it stands for, I suppose. My point is that my minds, er, mind, moves too fast for my own good. Even when slowed down to the speed of a 'retarded' Final Tier SO, I… well, everything else just seems way too slow, I guess. Usually, it's not an issue because I can occupy that time or find ways to make it go by faster, but being able to tour with two such wonderful people in a city such as this… made my hearts soar."
"I don't really like dwelling on it or dumping this kind of personal information on anyone needlessly, but you guys seem like really nice mortals. I spent the vastest majority of my existence completely alone and isolated thanks to the collective might of the highest-ranking Supremest Omnidonae ever to exist. I eventually managed to break free of those confines, and when I did… my life was never the same. Huge cities like this teeming with life were once a foreign concept to me, and I just… I can't help feeling so overwhelmed by the raw emotionality of it all, you know? I guess you don't. Most living things don't understand what being completely and utterly alone feels like, especially not on such a grand scale. But still, I hope that helps you both understand my excitement a little bit better."
Carly smiled and placed a hand on his arm. "Well, in a way, while we don't get it like that, mortals like us can understand differently. Not alone...but we have a problem with being, I guess, um...dragged along with the crowd?" She expertly threw her empty bowl and spoon into the trash 1 yard away. "We all wanna be more somehow. Money, status, social life, something. We don't wanna be no one but life just...it usually doesn't work that way. But when Stephan and Thomas came into mine and Gwen's lives, we couldn't believe how the powers above allowed us to be literally the luckiest girls ever."
I smiled and pecked her cheek, making her elbow me jokingly. "Same for the two of us and getting these powers. It was our calling to finally break away from the monotony of just going with how the world pushed and tugged at us. These powers allow us to do things we literally only dreamed of. It's..different being born without abilities and then getting them. Changes perspective." I did the same and threw my bowl in the same manner as her.
Rainbow's smile seemed to grow at that statement. "If there's one immutable truth I've learned in a cosmic superocean of immutable truths, it's that such perspectives really come down to one's outlook on everything. From observing your kind, I've learned that they're naturally inclined to obtain as much uniqueness and specialness as possible, even at the age of toddlers when they're telling their parents to watch them perform some lackluster stunt or trick, whether it is risky or not. Evel Knievel is a household name throughout the world because of his willingness to risk his life to perform insane tricks and stunts, all out of a desire most humans have to set themselves apart. It's easy to want to be more when you're born with next to nothing as far as means go, and that's a perfectly acceptable outlook to have. Humans don't seem to realize what truly being special implies, and what becomes of those who truly are, but that's what makes them remarkable, really."
"In a way, I'm quite envious of humans for that outlook, having been born the way I am and being on the receiving end of the hatred and unacceptance from a group of Deities who profess to be infinitely open-minded, non-judgmental, and accepting; I guess I'm more inclined towards a… cautiously optimistic outlook on what I am, and what I can do. Frequently, I rely on my Goddesses to pull me out of whatever wangsty rabbit hole I dig myself into. Perhaps if I had been exposed to mortals with your outlook sooner in my life, some of that positive view on power and being special would've rubbed off on me more. Alas, that's not how it went down, but I am forever grateful to Uhly'Opia and the others for saving me in my darkest and direst hour. When I hit my lowest point, they were there for me and loved me unconditionally when I was at my absolute worst. I'll never be able to repay them for that, but I'll spend the rest of my existence trying, and hey, in all modesty, being what I am doesn't hurt my chances with the ladies either." He looked almost mortified by making that type of a self-flattering comment like it went against his humble lifestyle. Yet, we could see that he was making an effort to be more self-loving.
I smiled a snarky smile and said, "Awww. Who could hate someone as adorable as you? Honestly, you're the easiest of your kind I've spoken to at this juncture, and your quiet nature just makes you all the more desirable. So, those women you're with see something in you that Carly and I do." I moved to sit on his other side and jokingly leaned against his other arm while Carly did the same to his previous one. "I'd date someone cute like you, no matter how others viewed you before. You're a nice lil' Rainbow Bean."
Rainbow's cloak blushed, indicated by the psychedelic nightmare flashing in a series of disco ball lights around the facial area. "As flattered as I am, I don't think it's a good idea for you guys to be touching me like that. I'm… um… I'm great at control and finesse, don't get me wrong, but dating mortals have a certain… risk factor tied to it that dating my kind has not. I really don't want to hurt you guys. Even if I can heal it faster than your brains can process any pain, I'll still feel it."
Carly laughed and said, "Well, I did warn you, he's a tease to people he likes. But he wasn't being serious. I think I'd be worried if Steph started making a habit of dating beings who would obliterate him with a breath after I helped him get over his own insecurities."
Rainbow snorted. "I… I'm perfectly capable of not obliterating him with something so silly, thank you very much. I'm not the Big Bad Wolf." He huffed with faux indignance, though we could see the humor underlying his pout. "That said, were I to consider it, I would have to rewire more than half of my brains for compatibility with Omnisexual orientation, as I'm not naturally Omni like that Aggron or Neo Thomas and Aiyanna's son. Of course, such rewiring would be temporary because I don't really feel comfortable completely changing anything about me forever, but I can be a decent mate to anyone, regardless of their gender, race, color, creed, or ethnicity, species, or sexual orientation. Also, temporary for me would mean countless eternities for everyone else."
"Thanks, though, I have to admit, it's nice to be teased like this by someone who isn't my Nancinaeku or Sefeesta. Not that I'd ever be displeased by their advancements, but it's fun to mix it up once in a while. Variety is the spice of life, as I believe you mortals say. Also, don't go writing off Supremest Omnidonae as dating partners just yet. Some of them love to be with mortals and are capable of leading you guys to Rainbows' Ends so peerless that what you 'currently' have with Aiyanna's Aggron would be very minuscule in comparison. I say currently because the love of every SO is always eternally evolving and self-transcending." He concluded his statement by wrapping his arms around us and pulling us into a 'gentle' group hug.
"Awww, thanks, Gimly," Carly said, "that's nice of you to say! But I don't think Daddy would appreciate that, haha! But we won't turn the offer down if we ever see you again later." She hugged him while I hugged him once with a single arm. Honestly, Rainbow's presence was friendly. Very, very, nice. I wonder if this was how being around any of them like this was. By 'them,' I meant...well, I don't have to explain.
"So, how long are you here for? You were looking for your woman, right, Rainbow?" I asked.
Rainbow chuckled. "Actually, I think I might have been the one to run off on her, this time. Her name's Uhly'Opia, and she is… EVERYTHING! Honestly, I wish I could stay here indefinitely, but if the wrong people see me at the wrong place and time, a lot of crucially all-important Supremest Omnidony timelines will be blown straight to the most chasmic plains of hell, beyond Level-IC USOF-Cardinal plains, even." He winked cheekily at Carly as he said that last part. "I will pop into being here whenever the opportunity is presented, but visits from me will have to be inconsistent and sporadic. I should be safe to stick around for a few months or so, though. I'm not leaving just yet." He added.
"Cool!" Carly said.
"Speaking of Uhly'Opia, I can sense her presence fast approaching us with your own friends in toe. I have it on the highest authority that it's considered rude by many a mortal not to greet them properly." Appaneesty announced before he finished the last dollop of ice cream off and tossed it over his shoulder straight into the can with a perfect, nothing-but-net shot. He stood up with us, still hugging his sides, and lifted us up on his shoulders by grabbing our asses and hoisting us up before he shot off like a rocket with us immovably stuck to his broad shoulders.
I could feel both Carly and I get a bit aroused from the instant ass-grab before he Superman'ed us away. And even as humans, he was doing something where we, once again, didn't feel the force of the wind.
Alright, maybe I will date him too. Share him with Carly.
...later.
But I wonder what his woman...this, Uhly'Opia was like.
(Thomas)
This Uhly'Opia Goddess was, simply put, an F-Infinity tornado in a room! My God, how could anyone handle this woman?! Within nanoseconds of proclaiming her gracious acceptance of our aid in helping her, she took off, but not without grabbing all three of us and taking us for the ride of a lifetime… somehow. We moved faster than fast, speedier than speed itself in all its aspects and forms, even the forms wielded by the most Supreme Omnidonae we'd thus far encountered. Maybe the ones we ever would meet. I didn't know; I couldn't have imagined this before.
Unlimitedly less than a Planck instant later, we were instantly in what appeared to be New York City, a realization that caught Gwen and me surprised as the overwhelming and sheer size of the metropolis was almost too much for our addled brains to process. Even Annasteeliest looked rather green, and I would've laughed at the realization that someone like her could actually get motion sick if I weren't so frazzled. Uhly'Opia was already skipping ahead, evidently to meet with her lover as a figure shot down from the sky above the Empire State building with Carly and Stephan gorilla glued to their shoulders.
"Appaneesty! There you are! I've been looking everywhere for you!" Uhly'Opia giggled excitedly as she launched herself into his waiting arms at the speed of a bullet train, but not before he used his powers and swiftly yet weightlessly removed our besties from his shoulders. My jaw dropped at the casual mention of my main character's name. How many times have I dreamed of one-day meeting with him, talking with him? How many of my storyboards presented him as the golden standard every Omnidony aspired towards? Meeting him was akin to meeting one's greatest idol in my terms but amplified by an inestimable value.
Gwen sensed my awe-stricken demeanor and elbowed me in the ribs to jar me out of it as we made our way towards them. Annasteeliest hung back and let us meet and greet with these strange new arrivals, her suspicion and apprehension written all over her face. Something told me these guys really weren't supposed to be here, more so than FS Yancinaeku even, though I don't know if such Cosmic Otherness was attainable even by the likes of FS Appaneesty himself.
"Carly, Stephan! There you guys are! Man, it feels like it's been ages!" Gwen squealed excitedly as she launched herself at Carly and made out with her right then and there in broad daylight, in the middle of the city atop an unoccupied skyscraper's roof. And like Carly, she wasn't scared to reciprocate the kiss.
"Yo dude, and hey there, my favorite adorable blonde, how's life been treating you guys these past few hours?!" I grinned at my guy and leered licentiously at Carly in turn. One of these days, we should really try and switch partners for a day or something; that promised to be fun.
Stephan shrugged with a smile. "You know, found someone new to play with. Saw New York and had some food and ice cream. The usual stuff."
"Good to see you as always, my darlingest Love Goddess. I'm sorry I worried you." Appaneesty cooed in delight, his hood lowered to reveal a face of such boundless male perfection that both Gwen and Annasteeliest blushed deeply at the sight of him. He placed a kiss on his Eternal Bond Mate's nose, earning one on the forehead from her in return as they held each other in their unbreakable full-body embrace, inextricably interwoven together. It was clear for everyone to see how pure and deeply they loved one another, so much so that they were seemingly oblivious to the rest of the world around them, and their all-seeing vision tunneled.
"Aren't you going to introduce me to your new friends?" Uhly'Opia asked him, prompting Appaneesty to snicker.
"Only if you introduce me to yours." He quipped back to her. Uhly'Opia looked like there wasn't a suggestion in the totality of the OIC2 System that could've made her happier.
"Right, okay, um… this is Thomas Currie as a Gengar, his mate Gwen the Gardevoir, and the SO Goddess Annasteeliest, daughter of Aiyanna and her Aggron," Uhly'Opia said, indicating us three with an eternally adoring smile.
Appaneesty didn't miss a beat. "This is Stephan and Carly, and I just happened to run into them while I was trying out some of that pumpkin spice espresso you recommended to me at that coffee shop chain known as Starbucks. I guess there really is a pleasure to be found in the mundane, huh?"
Appaneesty turned to Stephan and Carly while indicating Uhly'Opia. "You guys, this is Uhly'Opia, one of my multiple, Absolutest Eternal Bond Mates." He said with a hint of pride as my jaw dropped while Stephan's eyes seemed to be glued to her ever-changing hair.
When she was done making out with Gwen, Carly had her eyes sparkle as she looked at Uhly'Opia. I could tell that she looked at her Omni-chromatic hair and gorgeous dress.
"Wait a minute, I thought Absolute Eternal Bond Mates were… absolute singularities or something! Aren't Omnidonae only supposed to ever have one, if they have any at all?!" I asked in a stunned voice. I knew my knowledge as an author for my stories was getting progressively more outdated by the day, but I was surprised something as sacred and pricelessly precious as that particular singularity was changed.
Appaneesty offered me a shy, sheepish smile. "As far as I know, I'm the one and only exception to that rule, but the exception is not the rule, and that is still very much a rule even the Supremest Being Incarnations are unwilling to break. I'd ask Uhly'Opia to introduce me to you, Gwen, and Annasteeliest over there, but I trust I need no introductions. It's still super nice to meet all of you, an honor, really." He said while bowing to us, an action that blew my mind straight to heaven and hell. I chose not to say anything for now, but my mind was spinning with questions at this point. He was right though, he needed no introductions to Gwen and me.
"The honor is ours, believe us," Gwen said, not fully comprehending the sheer magnitude of this situation for me but having gleaned enough insight into this crazy world by reading my mind to know which characters of mine would one day accomplish the most legendary feats. Annasteeliest snorted somewhat derisively from somewhere behind us, a rude gesture Appaneesty and Uhly'Opia had the good graces to ignore.
"Hehehehe, Appaneesty's not usually a prideful person, but him being the sole exception to such an unbreakable rule is one of the few things he takes genuine pride in. It's most wonderful to meet you two, Stephan and Carly! Anyways, since we're all here together now, we should get to know one another on a more personal and individual level." Uhly'Opia suggested to everyone at large with the PERFECTEST smile and a giggle as adorable as sin.
Stephan blinked, had his eyes move to the side at nothing before looking back. "I….what?" He said dumbly, taken by her features. I couldn't blame him; I was still reeling myself.
Uhly'Opia giggled while Appaneesty blushed. "I'm saying we should spend some quality time together while we're able to enjoy it." She laughed sweetliest at my guy and with the patience of the saintliest saint.
Annasteeliest chose that very moment to clear her throat and grab all of our attention. "And this is where I'm obliged to step in. I'm sorry, I'm sure you two are perfectly lovely people, but your prolonged presence here puts us all at a greater degree of risk than the humans here can currently envisage." She said sternly, yet not unkindly. I could tell she didn't want to have to be the bad guy in this situation and rain on anyone's parade, but she was willing to do whatever it took to protect everyone here. I could appreciate and respect that, at least.
Appaneesty looked ready to show his belly and retreat from our existence as fast as he could, but Uhly'Opia merely smiled and replied in a way that had everyone's legs quivering and not from fear. "We were perfectly aware of the risks entailed when we came here and are doing everything required of us to render any such dangers nonexistent. The instant any higher-tier SO comes here whose timeline would be in jeopardy upon their encounter with us, we'll be gone, and nobody will ever know we were here too. We'll be able to sense them coming, regardless of their UOSC-Rank; you can rest assured of that, at least."
Annasteeliest looked to be wrestling with whatever internal struggles her people had, and that I could only glean the teensiest level of insight into. "You're putting me in a challenging position here. Both of you are. But as long as you promise me your presence here doesn't put everything at risk, then… I suppose you can stick around for now. But you'd better be on your best behavior, you hear me?" The Goddess with Aggron features warned them in a steeliest tone befitting her name.
"Of course, cross my hearts, hope to die, stick a steak knife in my all-seeing eyes~!" Uhly'Opia punctuated this sing-song nursery rhyme with the adorably human gesture of actually crossing her heart. Of course, she added her own unique spin on it by crossing it countless times over at super speed, her hands a blur of irrelevant motion to indicate her innumerous, no doubt rainbow double infinity hearts. That was probably the most childlike, heartiest openhearted statement any one of us had ever heard anyone make, and Annasteeliest nodded with satisfaction while Gwen watched the exchange with hearts in her eyes. Seriously, could anyone be cuter than this chick? This alternative, Appaneesty, was the luckiest bastard ever.
Appaneesty snorted and offered Annasteeliest an appreciative, full-body blushing smile. "Don't worry, you can trust us not to blow everything to hell and back again infinite times over. I may not always seem like it, what with my awkwardest bumbling, but my Eternal Bond Mates and I have a lot of experience dealing with these types of scenarios. I can't speak for Uhly'Opia here, as she has a certain talent for getting up to mischief…." He giggled, ignoring the indignant 'Hey' from the Goddess in question before adding. "But I can say I'll do my fuckedest to um… keep us both in check. You have my word. I'd die infinite deaths before I let anything happen to any of you."
Annasteeliest nodded, and I resisted the urge to snicker at the very obvious blush coloring under her eyes at his soul-searingly earnest words. It wasn't just the words but the way he said them in such a sweet, quiet, yet oh-so-suave tone. Oddly enough, I got the feeling he wasn't intentionally trying to sound smooth, that it was just how he naturally spoke. It was quite the panty dropper, I'd imagine, though I wouldn't know since I wasn't a girl.
"I'll hold you to that." Aiyanna and Aggron's daughter spoke, surprising me with how steady she kept her voice despite the vision of absolutest male perfection standing before her. I'd be sure to take a few pages out of this guy's book soon and plan to enjoy their visit here as best I could. I didn't like my chances of wooing Uhly'Opia, but that doesn't mean I wasn't willing to try. Deciding to go the douche route for a change and try to impress everyone, I dropped the bomb I'd wanted to drop for some time now.
"Oh, by the way, you guys… my thought worms, they've evolved! They've now acquired the ability to produce infinite amounts of virtual money on command, endowing us with literally limitless funds. We're more than just multi-billionaires now, Stephan and Carly. I've made us multi trillionaires for now and plan to continue increasing our and the world's wealth neverendingly. I plan to hyper-inflate the global economy, save the world from itself, and prevent the self-destruction of the human race." I gave a mental cheer as I finally announced my last big surprise for them, figuring it wouldn't have as much of a profound effect now, given everything that's happened.
In my opinion, Gwen's pregnancy was more important news, but I didn't want to spring that surprise on them without Gwen first okaying the idea. She hadn't said anything about announcing it yet, and we hadn't talked about it either, so I erred on the side of caution for now and didn't speak of it yet. I imagined the God and two Goddesses with us on this skyscraper roof could tell, though they thankfully didn't say anything. But still, I hoped Stephan and Carly appreciated my concerted efforts to make us Midas rich, at least.
XXX
(Stephan)
"You know what, dude? That's pretty epic, I won't lie." I said, after taking a few moments to fully internalize what he told us. Carly gave a surprised "whoa!" herself, but I wasn't as super flustered. I mean, already, those special Thought Worms of his made us more money than we could hope to spend in a dozen lifetimes...so what was more money? Didn't mean I didn't appreciate the speed at which those things of his evolved, though. "How did they evolve, though? Did they do it on their own? Are they like A.I. now or...how is that holding up exactly?"
Carly looked at me dumbfounded. "How are you not hyped after hearing how much money that is!?"
I stare for a bit and then shrug. "I was already mind-blown at the whole 'billionaires' thing. But after that point, just stacking even more money than we could never fully spend isn't that insane. What's insane is the fact that we have powers that can reshape entire landscapes and meet beings with abilities no one can honestly comprehend." I smile a bit. "But that doesn't mean I'm not interested in how these things got more efficient. Thomas, how'd they do that?"
Thomas smirked a facial expression that tended to look terrifying even in his human guise. "That's quite simple really, I took advantage of the lax rules on time in cyberspace, and um… well, I pulled a sort of SAO Underworld on them, accelerating time within the World Wide Web for them to evolve and grow stronger and stronger at an expanded rate. Also, with how malleable they are, I've just been constantly reprogramming their infinitely programmable makeup, making them better, stronger, faster, more efficient, and the like. They're capable of quantum computations now, something that was only ever considered sci-fi before now. All the while, I've been increasing my abilities IRL as well so I don't lose control of them, not that I ever would, mind you. I'm kind of… connected to them, inextricably interwoven even, though nowhere near to the extent that these guys are, I'd imagine." He said, indicating Uhly'Opia and Appaneesty, who exchanged a smile.
I cupped my chin while thinking about all he had told me. Honestly, that's some pretty awesome stuff right there. Immediately, he created the single most high-end piece of futuristic computing programs that this world wouldn't be able to reach unless their tech was slingshot several centuries, no, millennia ahead of time. Because not even in several centuries would the Earth be able to make programs like that.
"Well, shit, bro, that's cool! Honestly, I'm unsure how I'm going to counter that. Maybe I should just take a page out of your book and do the same thing. Sounds like helpful little bugs." Of course, I was joking, obviously. That was incredibly helpful and efficient. The power to have infinitely programmable A.I.-like programs to work with? Hell, we could go to a high-futuristic world or universe and rule it in under an hour. Maybe even 30 minutes with those things. "Still, I wanna see if I can make something as good as those worms. I need to stretch my abilities outside of my own body. I should do some more research and theorizing."
I felt a lurch coming through at that moment, and I hunched a bit forward and steadied myself. "Whoa...okay, that's a new feeling. Think I'm...hungry."
"What? But we just ate." Carly said to me. I just saw that there were these steel beams on this rooftop. Before I knew what I was even doing, I was in Gengar-Mode, appeared near the beams, and then began to just MUNCH on them, with no hesitation. As if it was some of the best stuff I'd eaten...which was a lie, of course. Nothing tops the food I had in that mansion, but still, this was some good metal! With my mouth full, I showed no manners and began speaking again. "Fuuuuck, this is good! Like really good!" I finished one of the beams and began to eat another one, not stopping.
Appaneesty's vantablack eyebrow could be seen arching somewhat, and Uhly'Opia giggled while question marks appeared above Annasteeliest's head. Thomas and Gwen were gaping at me before my guy burst a gut laughing. "HAHAHAHAHA! Dude, you totes look like Upchuck right now!"
"Hmmmm?" I said, turning to look at them. My expandable cheeks looked like they had bowling balls in them while my belly was comically round from me just gulping down these giant hunks of steel. Eh, it'd go back to its standard size once I was done. Cells are 100% under my command and all of that. But did I really look like Upchuck right now? I...guess what I was doing was fucking weird. The second beam in my stomach, I picked up a second while sitting on the ground. Feeling like Lois Lane after she was transformed back from a bunny caused by Mxyzptlk, I couldn't help but ask aloud.
"...Why am I eating these…?" I looked at the others, and I just kept on munching. "Guys, I'm eating construction equipment...and it's good. It shouldn't be...but it's good."
Annasteeliest answered. "Gengar pallets are as infinitely malleable as their bodies, cells, and ectoplasmic makeups. Actually, it's not surprising, especially when you consider your belly dimension and whatnot. Supreme Omnidonae like us are the same way, possessing infinitely broader pallets than every other lifeform combined."
Thomas couldn't help but snort. "It puts me in mind of that one episode of Mega Babies where Meg is teething and legit the cure for her toothache is her chewing on a fucking monster truck tire. Considering the things those babies consume and burp up in each episode… I'd say their pallets are considerably broad as well. Supreme Omnidony advantages be fucked."
"Ish…'dat really what dish ish…?" I asked, chewing on the last beam that was up here. I never once felt this urge to eat anything that wasn't an actual food item. And while what she said made sense, I still had this urge that something about this was...off. Also, Mega Babies!? I'm constantly reminded how different the programs we watched were growing up. But that sounds hilarious.
"But…" I swallowed and sighed, rubbing my belly. "I wasn't hit with a food craving like that before, and I couldn't even help myself. Is that really so normal for Gengar?" I smacked my lips as if something told me to go after more metal. Whoa...when did this fence get here? Ah, I think it was, so people didn't fall over if they wanted to look down.
Am I eating it?
Oh my God, I think I'm already eating it! I was literally like Pac-Man as I drifted from one side to the other, and I just munched away at this thing! Wasn't I just sitting down!? When did I even start snacking on the railing anyway! My teeth might as well have been using Hyper Fang with how effortlessly my fangs cleaved through the steel as if I was eating something fragile. I circled the room twice before the railing was just...gone. I let out a small belch as I set my sights on the others.
"Okay...I think I'm alright now. Um...so, Anna...those Gengar cravings again?" I felt another lurch and held my stomach in both hands, giving an audible groan. "Dammit, it's like my stomach is trying to eat itself! I need more metal! Steel, iron, gold, silver, anything!"
Annasteeliest giggled and obliged, while Appaneesty and Uhly'Opia looked on with amusement. "Some infinitely satiating 24-karat gold coming right up." She said and conjured the unbelievably pure metal in all its sunlike glory, a giant slab of it that took up half the rooftop by itself. "Everlasting 24-karat gold, instantly self-replenishes faster than even I could eat it. The more you eat, the more it fills you up. Even the unslakable appetite of an OIC2 Level Guzzlord would meet its match with this, well… unless you count the likes of Inverse Zeneptron's Guzzlord. Its appetite is said to be on par with a low-level UOIC2 Slayer."
"THANK YOU FOR THE FOOD!" In a blur of black and white, I was all over that massive slab of gold with me using Quick Attack. The moment that gold touched my tongue and I swallowed, I immediately began to cry from how...fantastic the taste was. I honestly have no way of describing how a massive slab of material can taste like ambrosia...but it did. Let it be known, I've tasted my own spoons, forks, and the likes while eating with them. They all had the same iron-ish, metallic taste anyone could expect...before this weird craving slammed me.
This taste was making me believe that I was eating at the best restaurant on the planet if such a thing existed on Earth. Definitely not, but, you know, that's the example given. And she was right. I zoomed around that slab faster than a speeding sports car. Faster than a jet. Faster than a rocket during take-off...and yet it replenished more quickly than me each and every time. And I was able to turn partially intangible so that air passed through me so I couldn't cause any turbulence moving like this. I felt myself getting fuller and fuller and fuller until...finally...I stopped.
I just...stopped with one final consuming. Gave a very loud belch that echoed so strongly I blew away some clouds forming in the distant sky and then floated to my back. I rubbed my round belly and sighed gold sparkles from my mouth. My face had a look of pure bliss.
"Ahhhhh~ Food sex...fulfilled…cravings...gone…."
Gwen and Thomas snickered. "Well, that was… interesting to watch." They chorused in perfect sync.
Annasteeliest giggled. "Indeed, but don't think the two of you will be bereft of such cravings yourselves indefinitely. Especially since you're expecting, Gwen." Thomas and Gwen's looks screamed murder at the pink-haired Aggron-girl's slipup as her eyes widened. So did Carly's...hell, so did mine! "Shit, um… I kinda forgot I wasn't supposed to announce that just yet. Total recall isn't exactly my cuppa, so I customize my memory accordingly. I'm sorry, you guys!"
"YOU'RE PREGNANT!? WHAT!? WHEN!?" Carly screamed in shock while I looked on from my position on my back, but I was staring at Thomas instead.
"LEGIT, DUDE!? HOLD ON, YOU WANNA TALK ABOUT CYBER WORMS WHEN YOU'VE PUT AN EGG IN THAT OVEN!?"
Gwen and Thomas exchanged silent glances, seeming to communicate entire ass paragraphs without words as they came to a mutual understanding and turned to us. "For the record, we were going to tell you guys, and very soon too, but we felt that maybe it'd be best to keep one last surprise for later on. We weren't able to confirm it until today, well, today relative to our mansion's faster timestream, anyway." Thomas said, coming clean while Gwen smiled sheepishly at Carly and me.
"It's not that we were trying to hide it, merely surprise you guys, is all. We wanted to wait for the perfect moment, but I suppose that's not possible now, so we'll have to make do with what we have." She said, turning her piercing amber eyes on Anna, who offered her an apologetic smile in exchange.
Appaneesty and Uhly'Opia both looked nonplussed and confused. "I'll never understand their sheerest fascination with procreation." He said while glancing at Uhly'Opia, who nodded in concurrence.
"Ditto, though it's clear they're delighted with this news. I can literally feel the emotional significance they've placed on it, and it's making my ever-present Omnipotent buzz all the more potent. I guess that's something worth richliest treasuring, at least. Even if it wasn't, the fact they're so happy makes me happy as well." She said to him in response. She turned to Thomas and Gwen with a smile too perfect to be real in any capacity. "Congratulations, you two. Well done! I'd imagine that's something to write home about! I can't say that Appaneesty, and I really get it, but we're happy for you all the same!"
Annasteeliest looked nonplussed by their blase response. "You guys never wanted to have kids?! I get that some Supreme Omnidonae don't feel as strongly about procreation as mortals do, but wow. Haven't you ever been the least bit curious how it feels to experience parenthood firsthand?" She wondered in a stupor, prompting both to shake their heads negatively in perfect sync.
"I can't say that I have felt such a desire, with Uhly'Opia or with any of my other Absolutest Unquantifiable Eternal Bond Mates. Maybe it's just us, but we're more than satisfied with our tightest-knit inextricable link without the addition of bringing more like us into existence through the act of orgasmic rapture. There are other ways to create life, far more intimate ways even. However, it's not just a question of not understanding procreation, but also the dangers of bringing more like us into existence all willy-nilly. It wouldn't be fair to the child that never asked to be born. Forced into a life where their very existence is shunned by the Supremest of the Supremest of your kind. Besides, when does anyone ever ask to be born in the first place?" Appaneesty explained his position to her, causing Annasteeliest's eyes to widen for reasons I didn't really understand.
But even I could see that this was going to territory that it probably shouldn't. So...with ma belly that was just as pudgy as Thomas' was for the moment, I floated up and over. I patted both him and Gwen on the shoulders with a large grin. "Gotta say, I'm proud of you both! I didn't think there'd be a lil' Ralts or Ghastly running or floating around here this soon, but I can welcome being an uncle. And here I am thinking that I'd be a daddy first with putting a few in Carly."
Carly snorted and lightly hit me on the back. "Not for your lack of trying."
Annasteeliest couldn't help but pipe up as well. "Incompatible egg groups. You're gonna have to find a workaround for that, I'd imagine."
Carly and I looked at her before looking at each other. Then looking back, she shrugged. "I mean, all we'd need to do is have sex as humans, and it just solves itself."
"Like...yeah," I said. "No one said we had to be Pokemon. Having sex as Pokemon is actually how we can have sex and not worry about having kids when we aren't ready for 'em." I mean, that was just common sense, right? I looked at Thomas and Gwen. "I mean, that's what you both did, right? Kind of the easy way to make a baby if you're the same species. The kid will just naturally develop the powers of whichever parent regardless, so having a purely Pokemon child just makes it moot if Egg Groups restrict us."
Gwen giggled while Thomas shrugged. "I don't doubt our kid would naturally develop some of our respective powers as well. Her being a pure Ralts likely wouldn't change that, though I'd imagine she'd be more Ralts based in terms of her movepool than Gengar-based. I'd imagine she'll have the Egg Move Shadow Sneak, though."
I blinked and facepalmed. "Bro, the powers aren't the point, and it's how you made the baby that I'm trying to get at here...also, congrats on it being a girl."
Thomas grinned and shrugged airily. "Thanks, and yeah, I get that wasn't the point. I just felt the need to clarify that our daughter would likely inherit from both parents as well. It didn't correlate to the point you made outside of embodying the best of both worlds. It was just a matter-of-fact statement, was all. I have a penchant for those, as you well know, ghehehehe."
"Gruh." I scoff with an eye roll. I swear, he just brings up the strangest topics sometimes. And now there's going to be a little him running around. Oh, well, babies are cute, so I'll take the uncle position. "Alright, and with that conversation being over...and me having eaten enough bankrupting gold...I think that I can say that our date went very well. Right, Carly? Rainbow?"
Rainbow blushed the same infinite shades of rainbow as his cloak. "What?! Why are you asking me?! I was totally the third wheel on this date! Was it the third wheel or some other odd number out in a set sequence? Never mind, that's not the point. The point is that you two were the ones dating!" He waved his hands in front of him in a series of emphatic gesticulations, steam literally erupting from his concealed face as Uhly'Opia giggled and grinned cheekily at him.
"Ooh, you rode along with them on their date?! Should I be jealous?!" She smirked, and somehow, he got even more flustered.
"No." Carly and I said. Right before, we glomped both of his sides and simultaneously kissed both of his cheeks. Well, more so the corner of his lips to be technical. I then said with a Gengar grin, "He's just adorably clueless. And that makes him very attractive, you lucky woman. He's a lovely Rainbow, he is."
Uhly'Opia beamed. "Oh, I'm lucky, alright, my Meta Luck was so high finding him I thought FR Neala was going to have a stroke in every one of her brains!" She giggled as Appaneesty ducked his head with fluster, though his voice carried with surprising strength and clarity when he responded.
"Of the two of us, I always feel like I was the luckier one, somehow. Uhly'Opia didn't just find me; she saved me in my darkest and lowest point; she was there for me when no one else was. To say I owe her the costliest of unpayable debts would be the understatement of our foreverhood." He found himself admitting, actually disarming Uhly'Opia with his words enough to make her blush as heatedly as he was currently.
Well, that's a lovely thing to hear. I removed myself from Rainbow's side, with Carly doing the same. My belly finally shrunk back to its standard size. Man, you'd think I ate America's weight in metal with how much that felt like. "Well, if anything, I hope you both enjoyed yourselves. Not sure whatever you both plan on doing next but...this was definitely a new experience for the lot of us."
Rainbow and Uhly'Opia exchanged an all-knowing, secret smile. "Actually, none of the events in this Fanfiction are canon to our stories, anyway. Nor the stories of any of the officiated, canonized Supreme Omnidonae. So, we can do pretty much anything we want, and it won't have any lasting impact on our story's actual continuity." Uhly'Opia informed us with an Anime-perfectest grin. Dammit, now they've got me abusing superlatives. This is what happens when you hang around these people...and I blinked. "Wait...are we living in a Fanfiction...or is this a Fanfiction to you guys?"
Uhly'Opia giggled. "Both and neither." She replied in earnest, a one hundred percent serious expression on her face despite that mind-fucking response.
Appaneesty elaborated on her words, following them to help clarify. "What she's saying is being what we are means that we're well aware of our own fictional existences from the perspective of every 'real world' there is. The events that are taking place here are mere fanon to the actual events of our story, so there are no lasting consequences to us even if we were to do anything that blew every SO timeline straight to hell. These events are also considered the fanon of your infinitudinous real-world counterparts, resulting in a strange paradox where the events of this story and every other are simultaneously real and fiction simultaneously. So, it's like multiple levels of nonreality and reality superimposing atop one another."
"You get our canon story, which is its own separate entity from all of this and not even written yet, technically speaking. Then you've got the fanon version of us portrayed in this existence which is fanfiction in itself by the standards of various 'real world' counterparts of you both. Finally, you've got our canon selves who retain traces of every outcome of our lives and existences, even the non-canon ones. However, for those versions of us who only experience our canon story, the rest of those alternative sets of memories and experiences are little more than fiction to them."
Carly blinked after hearing all of that and held her head. "God, I need to sit down after that one."
"No kiddin'. But I get the gist. All worlds are both real and fake in every timeline that exists." I said with a snap of my fingers. Okay, that's cool to know it's true! So, while I was definitely an authentic version of myself, there are probably other versions of me reading through whatever the hell Thomas and I do in this timeline. Heh...and I'm the lucky version of me to be living like a badass Gengar! Hell yeah!
(Thomas)
I guffawed at Stephan and Carly's need to sit down after these guys' longwinded explanation. To me, this kind of shit always made perfect sense. But then again, perhaps I'd be the guy who'd write these motherfuckers' speeches one day, so maybe it made perfect sense to me because it was supposed to. Meh, who knows and who cares. I was just happy to see my first version of Appaneesty early in my Gengar journey. And this Uhly'Opia chick… hot damn, she was pizzazzy as all hell. Those flashing iridescent white lights in her hair felt to me like they could induce epilepsy in even the Supremest Omnidonae around. Still, something was mesmerizing about her, even in comparison to the other SO Goddesses I've thus far seen.
Damn, this really was my story.
I mean, don't get me wrong, Stephan and our girls were not just side characters, but I think I was starting to get that the events that took place here seemed to pertain to my stories I hadn't written yet. Hell, I had to wonder if my boy would've been considered by my Neo Self and Aiyanna had we not had that fateful discussion about Gengars the night before we got our powers. Not that it mattered, I suppose, it's a never-were potentiality now, and had Stephan not been given powers right out the gate, I would've asked for them on his behalf, and failing that, found a way to provide him with capabilities myself. I would've found a way to include him in all this somehow. Luckily, I didn't have to.
God, I loved him. He really was the best soul brother a guy could ask for, even if he couldn't always see it in himself.
Gwen caught my eyes during my self-reflection and offered me a smile. I grinned back, knowing she could still read my mind and that I would have to step it up on my training if I wanted to keep my thoughts private. Not that I was capable of being deceitful, and I wore my heart on my sleeve. However, I wanted to actually surprise her on her birthdays and shit. Damn, I still couldn't believe how devoted I'd become to her in so short a time. Truth be told, I never imagined myself in a relationship IRL before. The fact that I was in such a loving one at the tender age of 27, going on 28, was astounding.
"Well, I get more than just the gist of it," I said aloud, taking a seat anyway with a Cheshire grin directed at Carly and my guy. Gwen rolled her eyes good-naturedly while Annasteeliest snickered, and Uhly'Opia and Appaneesty sat down between Gwen and me and Stephan and Carly, respectively.
"I have to admit, this is quite the view. This is the biggest city I've ever seen." I whistled appreciatively as I sat with my legs dangling over the edge of the skyscraper roof. The cars below looked like toys, and the people looked like ants. Hell, I was shocked I could see the people at all. Chalk that to my enhanced eyesight, I suppose.
"Yeah, no kidding. Canada has nothing on this scale. How high up are we?" Gwen idly wondered.
"Approximately 40 to 50 stories," Annasteeliest answered in earnest as I snorted with mirth.
"Damn, well, so much for my fear of heights, or I guess it was a fear of falling." I snickered. Steph leaned back and smirked at me.
"Guessing you no longer care about just dropping from a height like this?" He assumed his human form once again after his question.
"I've actually had dreams about doing exactly that and then halting my descent via my flight. My stomach always gave that whooping sensation like riding a roller coaster. Sometimes, it would be intense enough to wake me up. A part of me is curious what it would feel like to just… leap off of this structure for real." I admitted, having never gone into detail about those dreams with anyone before now.
Stephan gave a wave of his hand and a slight but noticeably upturn in his eyebrows. "Heh, maybe something similar where there are no people. But I'd do the same. Well, uh…I mean, I'd more so just drop and hit the ground knowing I'd be fine in the end. Just a way to show myself that I don't need to be afraid of falling if I know there's no certainty of death."
Carly scoffed and lightly punched him. "Well, that's not morbid." He just laughed a bit and punched her back.
Uhly'Opia giggled and joined us all on the ledge, Appaneesty a step behind her as she turned to us with a smile. "If it were me, I'd take it even further. I'd drop, hit the ground, and then phase… all the way to the gooey core of this infinitesimal planet. Maybe even hit the solid inner core while I'm at it." She whispered in a joking manner as we all collectively sweatdropped.
"I don't know. That seems a bit extreme, even for me." I found myself admitting.
"Not to mention infeasible. The cores of most versions of Earth are 592 times deeper than Challenger Deep, which is the deepest part of the Mariana Trench, and the Kola Superdeep Borehole, the deepest manufactured artificial chasm in land or sea during this part of the 21rst Century. At your current level, you wouldn't make it beyond the enormous subterranean mountains in Earth's mantle before you ran out of energy for phasing. You would become tangible amidst a billion tons of primordial rock and mountains that dwarf Everest." Annasteeliest oh gratuitously supplied as I turned green at the thought of being crushed by omnipresent rocks on a fucking subatomic level.
"Yeah, let's not and say we made it to the core instead," Gwen stated, and we all agreed unanimously.
"Still, that doesn't mean I can't try and muster up the courage to leap off the skyscraper. The core of the Earth can wait until I know I can manage such an arduous journey, but this is something I know I can do. Now, doing it is another matter." I said while attempting to hide my nervous swallowing tick from everyone present.
Gwen, bless her heart, stared at me in confusion. "What do you mean?" She curiously inquisitioned adorably. She was cute, regardless of her form.
"I merely mean to say that it's a long way down, and powers or not, my fear of heights isn't going to go away overnight. Even if it is an irrational fear, now." I admittedly coolly, still feeling somewhat on edge sitting so close to the, ahem, edge of this 50-story drop. Okay, so maybe I wasn't as over that very human fear of mine as I thought.
"Wow, I can't believe a guy who is two meters tall is afraid of heights." Gwen couldn't help teasing me while holding back her laughter. I looked back at her with a pout, the big meanie.
Uhly'Opia couldn't help herself from joining in as well. "Yeah, I mean, you're almost as tall as Appaneesty here. What's up with that?" She giggled, and I snorted.
"Pfft, blow me bitches." I responded with faux indignance, prompting the two of them to giggle once more. I again took to staring over the edge into the ever-busy streets below. Indeed, this grand metropolis earned its reputation as the city that never slept.
"All joking and humor at Thomas's expense aside; usually, when people say they're afraid of heights, it's not high places they fear, it's falling. This fear of falling can stem from a lot of diverse root issues. In psychology, it is believed that flying and then subsequently falling in dreams represents a fear of being grounded or tethered to the constraining world below. Thomas strikes me as one of those types of psychological profiles." Wow, Annasteeliest was on a roll today. Everything I'd ever researched about flying in dreams lined up with what she said.
"I mean, I'd made similar conclusions as well, about the fear of falling from a great height and the fear of being tethered or kept from soaring to new heights, but I never overthought about whether the latter applied to me. It always seemed like I'd be implying that I was too good for this world if I let myself go down that existential rabbit hole. I didn't ever want to come across as that arrogant, even if it's backed up by a lot of my actions on behalf of the people I love." I replied to everyone at large.
Gwen looked surprised and said as much in her following statement. "Wow, Thomas. That was remarkably profound, even for you."
Uhly'Opia took it a step further by getting right near the edge and whispering in my ear. "Some angels aren't meant to fall, you know. Don't ever let the limiting nature of this reality get you down because you are too good for that. I don't have to know you for years like Stephan did to recognize that much. You'll find your wings when the time is right, and as soon as you stop trying to force yourself, it'll happen on its own. You can break the chains that are holding you down, and when you do, you'll soar higher than any Gengar ever has before."
Damn, okay, I was full-body blushing now. That was easiliest on the top 10 list for the nicest, most impactful statements anyone has ever said to me. Hell, it was right up there with Stephan telling me once, years ago, that I deserved to have the powers of my strongest characters, that I was too good for anything else to be acceptable. God, I don't know what I did to garner such faith in my innate goodness from the people I love most, but I'd do my damnedest to continue surpassing their loftiest friendship standards regarding me. They deserved me at my bestest best for all that loyalty and devoutest devotion. They deserved to have their boundless faith in me rewarded beyond measure. That's what any God who garners worship from entire civilizations should do, and it's what I strive to do now on a more personal and individual level.
