Blueeyeddevil06, thank you for your help on this story and for being my beta.

Usagi woke with a shudder. Her dream had come again. Night after night, she saw her gruesome death. Every night she, Sailor Moon, made a different decision, a different move, and it ended in a youma killing her every time. The same youma every time, piercing her chest with a long spear-like arm. She watched as Tuxedo Mask grabbed hold of her as she de-transformed; she whispered something to him and then died in the street with blood pouring from her.

She knew the truth now. This last night she chose not to show up at the battle against the youma. After all, her friends needed her to live. It worked —she didn't die. It was so much worse. Sailor Mars, Mercury, Venus, and Jupiter all died. Not one of them made it out of the battle that she avoided.

She wiped away her silent tears, sat up, and decided to shower. She was soaked with sweat. At least now she knew what she had to do. She was heading towards her death.

The last dream actually gave her some comfort. Her death would save the lives of her closest friends. They would live on. Her end had meaning in their continued existence.

Once she showered, she finished her homework. She then dressed and was able to eat breakfast before she went to school. She didn't have to run today. Today she was on time. It gave her a sort of dark amusement that now that she knew she was walking towards her eventual death, she had started to get her life on track.

As she made her way to school, she turned the corner and saw Mamoru. "Odango, you're not running late today. Is the world coming to an end?"

No, just my life. She forced a smile and said, "Mamoru Baka, I got up on time. No detention for me today." She faked cheerfulness and smiled up at him.

"Well, I'm still going to keep an eye out for the end of the world." He pretended to look around for cataclysmic events.

She shook her head and walked around him. She then spun to face him, walking backward and saying, "Who knows. Maybe you won't have to run into me much longer. That should make you, of all people, happy. Maybe this is a portent of good things to come for one Chiba Mamoru. No more collisions on your morning walk."

She wondered if he'd miss her and their banter. For a while, she believed he enjoyed their game. Then she began hoping deep in her heart that his constant teasing and attention meant he had feelings for her. That was until she realized she was allowing herself to fall in love with him. That thought horrified her. She quickly realized that even if he enjoyed their game, it didn't mean he would love her back. She hardened her heart and tried to remind herself that he was older, more mature, chased after by sophisticated women. Not the type of man who'd fall for her.

She made it to school that day with plenty of time, Surprising her teacher and her friends.

Three days later, she saw the flier for the evening concert in the park for a symphony playing Mozart in two weeks and three days.

Now she knew when she would die.

An icy cold gripped her heart, and she actually shivered despite how hot it was outside. She wouldn't live to graduate high school. She would die her senior year; death was coming, and soon.

She started to make her way to the Crown Arcade. She knew she shouldn't be alone with her thoughts right now. She considered giving some of her things away and realized it would make her look suicidal. Was she? Was she choosing to die? No. She wasn't. She wanted nothing more than to live. Her dreams had just shown her that her fate was sealed. No matter what she did, it ended in death.

The doors to the arcade whooshed open, and the cool air conditioning met her as she walked in. She shivered at the temperature difference and made her way to a table —alone.

Motoki brought her a milkshake before she even asked for one. She looked curiously at him and asked, "What made you bring me this?"

"You. You look sad today, and I'm not used to it. I was hoping to cheer you up. It's on the house."

She forced a smile and said, "Thank you, Motoki Onee-San, you know you make the best milkshakes. I hope you know how much I appreciate you!" She then took a sip of her shake.

"Are you feeling better now?"

"Yes! So much better!" She didn't feel bad lying to his face. After all, he could do nothing to fix her problem, and he was so kind. She knew too that she couldn't share her burden with him.

That night as she laid down to bed, she wondered what it would feel like to die. She hoped she would be brave and not weep all over Tuxedo Kamen.

The following morning there was a battle in the park against the youma. She fought recklessly. After all, she knew when she would die, and it wouldn't be today in the sunlight. She died in the dark, under a new moon. It made sense to her that the moon wouldn't be shining down on the night of her death.

"What the hell?" Sailor Venus yelled during the fight. "You're taking too many risks!" Just then, Tuxedo Mask appeared and whisked her out of the way of an attack.

She thanked him and then shrugged. "I'll be fine. Sailor Mercury, where is its weakness?"

"In the middle of its forehead!" She yelled, looking at her Mercury computer.

Sailor Moon then pulled off her tiara and dusted the final youma. "Another one down," she said flippantly.

She walked off as everyone scattered, and when she turned down an alley, Tuxedo Kamen was standing there with his arms crossed, glaring at her. "What the hell was that?! Do you even care what happens to you?!"

"Yes, I do care. More than you could possibly know!" she yelled back, suddenly incensed. She didn't want to die! She wanted to live. To grow up, find love, have a family. That would never happen for her now. She would die in the dark laid out on the street with a gaping hole in her chest choking on her own blood at eighteen.

"Then why weren't you more careful?! You were reckless today," he was furious with her for putting herself in danger. "I saved your ass twice today." He thought about how it was a very sexy ass.

"If only you could save me every time," she said bitterly. "But thank you for saving me today."

She spun on her heels and began to leave. She wanted to get away and scream. She wanted to change her fate, but she couldn't. She was stuck on a headlong course towards death. He couldn't possibly understand her and what she was suffering through.

It was becoming harder and harder to pretend she was okay. Nobody could figure out why she was slacking off even more, why she was barely trying at school.

Usagi sighed out loud to herself. She didn't want to meet the girls tonight. It was Friday, and they all made plans to get together, but she didn't feel up to faking being happy.

Instead, she faked sickness and got her mom to call into school, saying she wouldn't be there. She then slipped out her window and left. She made her way to the park and sat on a bench.

She had brought paper. She decided to write a letter to the girls. She'd have it delivered after she died. That way, she could assure them there was no other way and that she had to die, that they didn't have to feel bad over what happened. She didn't want them to live with guilt after her death.

Dear Friends,

I know what my fate is/was. I've lived with it for weeks now. I know I'm headed towards death –that I am dead. I have accepted it. Please, don't pity me.

The dreams came suddenly one night, and then they didn't let up. I died each and every single time. I did something different each time in my dreams; I dodged, fought, attacked…. Over and over every night, I changed what I did, and every night, I died the exact same way. It's meant to be. Please, believe that.

You might be mad believing that I didn't think to skip out on the fight. That's not true. I so did. One night in my dream, I didn't go to the battle. I let you four, and Tuxedo Kamen face the youma alone without me. You girls all died. I couldn't do that to you. I couldn't keep my life at the cost of the four of yours–four lives that will grow up to find love and happiness. No. No way.

Please promise me to live. Live for me because I want that so much for you. Love boldly, and be there for each other for the rest of your lives. I need to believe you will be.

I never said this, but I love a man. And although it's unrequited, I love him completely. Even right now, as I think of him, I'm smiling.

Would you please tell Mamoru about me? I want him to know why I disappeared. Please, don't tell him the whole truth. Please, please, don't tell him that I love him. I know you have guessed that. He doesn't need to carry the burden of my feelings after my death. Tell him that I enjoyed the banter we had and that he was my friend. That is all he needs to know.

I love you all.

I would like to make one request for my funeral. I want roses there, please. They make me feel safe, and to me, they mean help has arrived. They also remind me of my first and only kiss when Tuxedo Kamen kissed me under the full moon.

My life was cut short, but I was blessed. I had the four of you by my side, and I couldn't have asked for more. Well, maybe a kiss from Mamo-chan. But it's better this way. Now, I don't really want him to return my feelings. After all, I'm dead, and I care for him too much to want him left behind.

I chose this path, and I don't regret it. I love you all.

Forever with my love,

Usagi

She folded up the note and went in search of a messenger service. One that could deliver the letter the day after she died.