CHAPTER ONE
2x15 Revelations
It wasn't until Spencer was abducted - that's when she noticed it the first time. When she was alone with Emily in the bathroom. She was so on edge she basically pulled a gun on Emily. But Emily seemed fine. She always did. It was something that JJ had noticed before. Emily was stoic. She was calm, and collected and… fine. All the time, it seemed. Never had JJ been so envious of it than she was in that moment.
"How come none of this gets to you?"
Emily looked a little confused, "What do you mean?"
"You came off a desk job. Now suddenly you're in the field surrounded by mutilated bodies and - you don't even flinch." JJ watched Hotch approach from behind Emily.
"She's right, you've never blinked."
"I guess… maybe I compartmentalize better than most people."
It was the only explanation she offered, but JJ knew there was more to the story. And it was then that she noticed her draw to Emily. At first it seemed like a curiosity - a desire to understand her mysterious new colleague. But it quickly turned into something else - a need to be around her. And a deep desire to make sure Emily was safe.
Emily had a feeling. She got those from time to time. Call it a profiler's intuition. The first week she worked at the BAU she just knew. She didn't know quite what she knew yet. She didn't know what it would evolve into. But she knew that she'd be forever tied to JJ, whether she liked it or not. JJ was not the first person this had happened with. But it was by far the quickest and undoubtably the strongest. Throughout her life, she had learned not to show too much too soon. Oftentimes, when she felt instant connections with people and it took a long time for them to catch up. So, she'd learned to not be too intense. Not to come on too strong. Keep people at a distance.
That's why she froze at JJ's question. They hadn't really known each other for long. But Emily couldn't stop herself from checking on her. She suggested they go to a meeting together as casually as she could. And right when she was about to walk away, JJ stopped her.
"Emily!"
"Yeah?"
"How come none of this gets to you?"
She obviously couldn't tell JJ. If she did, they would be here for hours. And she would probably never look at Emily the same. Besides, the last thing JJ needed in that moment was to take on someone else's baggage. But Emily internally grimaced at her question. It did get to her. There was a moment that evening when she thought JJ was dead. And just thinking about it was harrowing.