7

Ianto waited for them to all be in their tents, the rain starting to fall and the raised voices drifting on the breeze as they all complained about the state of their first night's sleeping arrangements.

"Oh god… something bit me" Ianto screamed theatrically, then rushed out of the tent to slap at himself and scream some more "buggery fucking bugger… bit me… god!"

"Oh my god" Jack rushed to seize him and rush off the site for their car yelling that Ianto had allergies, then they ran for the car and giggled all the way home where they spent the night with their babies safe and sound.

First shot across the bow to see what happens.

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Next morning and they were back, Ianto in an oversized bathrobe and a wild look, his hair all messed up as Jack chased him around the site telling him to calm down.

"Is he OK?" Mildred asked nervously.

"They have changed his meds" Jack said with a roll of his eyes, "Could be fine… or not. We will have to see."

Mildred looked at Ianto with wide eyes as he rampaged past, his little bunny slippers getting covered with mud. Yeah. It had rained. Pity… looks like it had been a horrible night out in the elements… for everyone else.

"COFFEE!" Ianto suddenly yelled, running for the Starbucks Truck entering the lot to drive to it's pegged out space.

"Ah, thank god. They have a portable Starbucks" Jack said with genuine relief. Ianto was really pissy as J.D. had kicked up when they were leaving and this would help him focus on the matter at hand… their first challenge.

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"Come again?"

"The first challenge is to take 500 dollars and do up the room into a guest room" Jack frowned as he made a show of reading the task left for them on the 'Task Table' so he could host without it being obvious "So… I guess… right, so according to this we each pick a room and get to it."

"Do we have to paint it?" Ianto asked "Or is it already painted, just dressing it?"

"I don't know Tiger, they might not all be….. the same" Jack sighed as everyone took off and Ianto walked over to kiss Jack, patting his arse and winking as they let the others move fast, leaving the last and worst room for them.

Don't want to win this one… remember?

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Ianto stood proudly with the splash of purple paint on his cheek as he looked at his masterpiece, Jack looking unsure but haphazardly chucking handfuls of glitter at the wall Ianto had just painted. It looked like a shit show.

"I don't know Cariad" Ianto called out loudly "Is it too late to repaint?"

Laughter stared down the hall in the other room as someone heard him and Jack hid his amusement with a theatrical sigh "Darling… far too late."

"botheration… the glitter is just… not big enough. We need more like… like… confetti stuff… yes! Do we have any confetti?"

"No lover" Jack said, now trying to cover his mouth to hide the giggles.

Ianto shrugged "Oh well then… come on honey… I can't get the duvet into this bloody cover thingy… where are my unicorn glasses?" Ianto roared and Jack rushed to fall over the bag of stuff and roll around cursing loudly. Ianto staggered out with the duvet cover over him like a huge sack, then squealed and ran into a wall. He laughed as he pulled the cover off.

"Oh my god, are you OK?" Mildred raced to help Jack up and Ianto pouted as he answered for Jack.

"His arse cushioned his fall… I need my glasses. Cariad… my glasses. I can't see… the glare from the glitter … erghhhh" Ianto threw his arm over his eyes like a swooning damsel in distress and Jack struggled to his feet.

"Well… bugger me!" Jack said happily "I didn't know we got one of those."

He then dove into the bag and removed what appeared to be a huge head. Everyone had come out of their bedrooms and their eyes widened as they watched Jack place it inside the door on the dresser with pride, the eclectic and horrible mess complete.

Ianto moved the head a smidge to the left.

Now it was just right.

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The judges walked around the rooms and got to Ianto and Jack's. Their faces showed their horror as one of them refused to even enter. One of the men entered and said softly 'Oh my god' before backing out.

They all stood and waited for their scores and Ianto excitedly jiggled on the balls of his feet like they might win while Jack held the back of the robe by its belt… yes… if you are asking he did do the entire challenge in that bathrobe.

As the scores came on and Ianto and Jack were last, Ianto roared with mirth and pointed at it "Look… I told you they would not get my vision."

As everyone went to choose their houses Ianto and Jack calmly took the time to talk quietly to the crew before moving to the home Ianto had handpicked from the get go…like he had known… it was theirs.

Ianto and Jack had the best house on the block.

Idiots.