October 2029

James stumbled home on Saturday morning around nine, after what his uncle Ron would have called a bloody hell of a night.

He was still drunk.

Unbelievable. He wasn't nineteen anymore, for Merlin's sake.

Yet, James felt like he wasn't going to survive nights like these much longer and the team had won the match against the Kenmare Kestrels by 350 points.

Causes of force major should be suitably invoked, and since he knew his parents would agree, he didn't feel remotely guilty about it.

His phone rang, piercing the silence and prompting a groan from James.

Up until three months before, he would have never contemplated picking it up.

Now, he reached for it tiredly, nonetheless smiling when he saw a 'private number' call.

"'llo…" He muttered, laying down on his couch and closing his eyes.

"Vic." The voice was anxious. James's right eye widened slightly, worried.

"I think I'm in deep shit," she said, desolated. "I keep thinking about James Potter…"

James grinned, relaxing. "An STD would be worse."

"I'm serious! It's insane, I've never even met him."

The voice was small, vulnerable; unbearably cute.

"But… Merlin, he seems so funny and witty… he's probably a universe away from the usual losers I go out with. And… and his voice, Vic. I thought I was going to melt when he asked me out. What do I do?"

James sighed deeply, content.

"Call him."

"And tell him what? 'Hey, James, it's me, the mental girl with verbal diarrhea that called you a couple of times… pathetic."

"He asked you out, right? Logic tells us he probably likes you."

"Logic doesn't have anything to do with the situation: let's be real for a second, ok?"

She didn't wait for an answer.

"He's James freaking Potter. He has an army of beautiful fangirls that flock around him, he would never like me. Besides, I'm a Gemini, you know for me it's always love at first sight… if I see him it's over." She sounded adorably flustered.

Something warm started in James' chest and he forgot his headache.

"Darling, you think too much. Just go for it, I'm sure he doesn't even notice the fangirls."

Deep, tense silence.

A sharp, panicky intake of breath on the other side of the phone.

"Tell me you're Vic."

"I'm Vic."

"Swear!" She cried out, clearly distraught.

He hesitated. "Ehm…"

"Oooooh Merlin, what an aaaass…" She howled, and something fell in the background. "This beats everything else! I need to be cured!"

"Relax, darling," he said, seraphic, "I think a Calming Draught would be most effective right now."

"I just want to die," she whispered, shame evident in her tone. "Now. And never get out of my house again."

"Well, that would just ruin my day."

"Mine is already ruined, Jamie! No way we're meeting after this," she whined, pitifully.

"You know, this Jamie thing you've developed is just cruel," he muttered, turning to his side, trying to find a more comfortable position that didn't make him want to die.

"As I just confirmed once again, Jamie, life is cruel."

James laughed. "I think I've heard that one before."

"Oh, Merlin. I'm going to hang up now."

"No!" He said, maybe too quickly. "I just had a most difficult night, darling. Distract me."

She sighed and he could almost see her smiling. "What did you do?"

"Drank the equivalent of my body mass in Rubin shots."

"That's impressive. What else can you do that would kill a mere mortal?"

He smirked. "I can stand up on my broom for a full minute, I can hold my breath for three – a necessary skill if you want to survive the Falcons locker room –, I can sing the first act of The Barber of Seville and I know how to roller skate."

She giggled. "You should put it in your cv."

"It's all there, black on white. What's in yours?" He asked, curious.

"Well, I can drive and use the maps on the phone with a success rate of about 88%, I can walk with high heels on the grass without falling and I know how to make Wasabi."

James was so glad she had gotten the number wrong again, he just blissfully whispered "Amazing."

"I know, my Japanese grandma taught me how to and I'm really good at it."

"Making Wasabi?" He asked, raising an eyebrow.

She laughed sarcastically. "No, walking on grass with heels."

"You sound like a mystic and legendary creature."

"And I have the grace of one, too!" She shouted merrily.

"Really?"

"No, I move like a drunk elephant." She retorted, snorting.

"Well, for me that's a quality! C'mon, you have to have some flaws."

"Besides the total lack of filter between brain and mouth?"

He could hear her insecurities as clear as the sun; he wanted to make them all disappear because she was amazing and he was dazzled and turning into a sap but still. He liked her.

"Another stunning quality."

"Well… I'm always late. It's pathological. I even keep my watches five minutes early, but the fact that I know it kind of nullifies the intention."

He snorted. "At least you try."

"Lots of good, that does. But I always bring wine at parties," she said, trying to sound endearing.

"I can't drink wine. It's just foul," retorted James, scrunching up his nose at the thought of any alcohol, let alone one he hated.

"I once asked a friend of a friend if she was pregnant. She wasn't."

He couldn't resist rolling his eyes, amused. "I turned my sister's boyfriend into a salamander, once."

"I pee in the ocean."

He laughed.

"You think you're winning, but in the area of making a fool of oneself, you're just a beginner."

"Prove it." She challenged him, all embarrassment forgotten.

"I accidentally drank an aphrodisiac potion at a dinner party with the family of my ex-girlfriend then proceeded to make lascivious advances to every person in the room. Her grandma threw the pudding on my face."

She cried out in delight. "Wait. How do you accidentally drink an aphrodisiac potion?"

"When your girlfriend wants to try to spice up the relationship but she's messy."

Pause.

James wondered if mentioning Carla had been a good idea, after all.

"Is she an ex because of that?" She asked then, hesitantly.

He smirked, feeling her jealousy. Somehow, that just made him want to see her more.

"My, my, aren't we curious for someone who doesn't want to meet me."

"I'm not curious, it's just that knowing my bad luck when I fancy someone…"

Abrupt, stark silence.

James held his breath and was sure she was doing the same.

Suddenly, the need to see her seemed almost unbearable.

"Are you still breathing?" He asked, tentatively.

Another few seconds of silence. "No, I'm just tying a rope on the ceiling," the voice answered, almost scared of itself.

"Remember to leave a note!" He tried to joke, but his smile said it all.

"I don't really fancy you, you know…" She tried to backpedal, anxious, "it's just, you seem really nice and funny… and you have a beautiful voice…"

"Yours is adorable, too," he cut her off, suddenly intense, "impetuous, happy, full of life… I wish I could drink it." He finished, hoping to send his message across.

He was mesmerized and he didn't even know her name

She stayed silent longer this time and James felt, for the first time, that he had fuck the whole thing up.

"Listen…" He started dejectedly, ready to reassure her.

She interrupted him. "Elizabeth."

James opened his eyes, caught by surprise.

"What?"

She swallowed loudly. "My name is Elizabeth."

Another pause.

"Oh."

And then James grinned for no reason at all.

"Well Elizabeth, nice to meet you. I'm still James, but 'shit' or 'Merlin' are also good."

She giggled, nervously. "I must be crazy. I should go."

"Bye, Liz. If you want, you can phone the wrong number around five, tomorrow... when I'll resurrect from my hangover."

"Sure… bye."