Summary
Luffy swore to himself that he wouldn't cry before his crew. He was their captain, their leader, he was supposed to stand in front of them with strength. But he soon realized how hard that was once he saw them again for the first time in two years. With the weight of Ace's death weighing down on his shoulders, Luffy learns to lean on his crew for not only fights, but for emotional comfort as well.
(Nakamaship, Dark Themes, Trauma)
ALL RIGHTS BELONG TO EIICHIRO ODA! CHARACTERS, WORLD, ALL! I JUST MADE THIS PLOT!
(OOC Warning)
Chapter 7: The One He Studied For
Chopper couldn't get the worries off his mind. He sighed as lowered the medicinal herbs he was looking through, thinking back to the morning he found Luffy sitting alone on the figurehead. Chopper never thought that he would ever see his ambitious, bouncing-ball-of-joy captain sit with an atmosphere of such...loneliness.
Tears filled his eyes as Chopper remembered the large words that marked the newspaper two years ago after the war at Marineford. It hurt him to think about loss, remembering Dr. Hiriluk. The little doctor sniffled, rubbing at his eyes and shaking his head to snap out of his mournful state.
"No! What Luffy needs right now is a supportive friend and doctor!" Chopper said out loud confidently. "I need to find out what he needs and help him the best I can!" He puffed out his chest with a look of triumph.
Maybe I can ask Sanji if he can help... Luffy doesn't like medicine since he thinks it tastes bad...
"Chopper—"
The little doctor shrieked, startled out of his thoughts before scrambling behind his desk with a racing heart. He calmed down once he heard a familiar giggle.
"I'm sorry, did I startle you?" It was Robin. She was smiling at him, kneeling down to his eye-level. "You're hiding the wrong way, by the way."
Chopper jumped, flustered. "Ehe... Sorry, Robin... I was thinking about something so I didn't notice you..." His gaze fell, worry prominent in his little features. Robin took note of it, knowing that it could only be caused by one major worry that was on the minds of the entire crew right now.
Their dear captain.
Robin's smile grew smaller and she stood up to sit on the emergency bed by Chopper's desk. "It's painful to lose someone, isn't it?" Chopper looked up with wide eyes at Robin's words and she simply smiled back. That was one of many things Chopper admired Robin for.
She's so strong...not just physically but mentally as well...
When Robin finally came around to opening up about herself shortly after she properly joined the crew— Chopper learned about the Ohara tragedy. Robin had witnessed so many lives be taken away right before her eyes...and it was when she was just a child. She even had someone lose their life in order to protect her.
Chopper bit into his quivering lip, his arms hanging at his sides as his little blue nose twitched with a sniffle. "I wanna help him...! I wanna help Luffy, Robin!" he said in a choked voice. "B-But I don't even know where to start...! Luffy seems like he doesn't even want to talk about all that much... I don't want to hurt him more!"
Robin stood up from the bed, taking Chopper into her arms and patting his head affectionately. "Chopper. You are a very capable doctor and friend," she whispered softly. "Remember that time Aokiji froze both Luffy and me? You helped us so efficiently even with the lack of a proper infirmary to help you. I thought I was done for when I got attacked."
"I-I lived on Drum Island— a very cold place! So working with chilled bodies and people with frosbite...is just something that I had done before," Chopper explained with a sniffle. He was eased by Robin's hug, feeling better with his worries already.
"Is that so?" Robin released Chopper and met his eyes with a gentle gaze. "Chopper, you're capable of helping out Luffy. The point of a crew is for everyone to support each other, right? So if you have any concerns or hesitation when trying to act on something...one of us will always be here to help you out."
Chopper's eyes lit up with a wide smile growing on his face. "You're right! I can do this!" He jumped, filled with the determination to take action. "Robin! I've noticed that Luffy hasn't been sleeping as much, but what about you? Have you noticed anything?" he asked.
Robin put a hand to her chin, thinking for a moment. "I think... Well, he is eating a lot less than he usually would, but I think his apetite has been coming back. I believe Sanji helped him out there," she said with a smile. "It's probably because...nightmares that Luffy can't sleep that much anymore. It was a great tragedy he witnessed, afterall."
"Mm... You're right." Chopper looked towards his desk, spotting the familiar purple flower amongst the field of green. "Ah! I can use this!" he exclaimed brightly and held out the flower towards Robin.
"What do you think, Robin?"
She smiled. "I think it's a good idea, doctor. Luffy tends to wake up before sunrise and is usually in the crow's nest or on the figurehead before anyone else wakes up," Robin informed. "If you like, I'll take the watch at that hour and we can set a little something up for Luffy together in the crow's nest."
"That'd be great! Thanks Robin!" Chopper ran towards the door, looking back with a grin. "I'm gonna talk to Sanji about making Luffy something yummy!" he said, bouncing with energy and a gleeful smile at the thought of helping his captain.
— X —
The little doctor was dashing around with the busy bounce for the rest of the day. Sanji and Robin knew what he was up to so they didn't make any note of his hasty behavior, but Chopper was sure he piqued the curiousity of Franky and the others that didn't know the full story of his sudden business.
But, none of that mattered right now! Chopper smiled confidently as he patted the soft pillows filled with his surprise for his precious captain. He had most of it ready and Robin had offered to make the finishing touches later when she took night watch.
Then he jumped with a sudden idea, remembered the cool winds of the sandy air of Alabasta. Chopper scurried down the ladder of the Crow's Nest and made a mad dash for the navigator studying her maps under the shade of a parasol. He slowed down as he spotted Luffy not to far off watching Franky complete a new machine.
As torn as Chopper was to go join his captain in the inspection of the cyborg's newest creation, he shook off the desire instantly and reached out for Nami. "Nami, Nami," he called her softly. She looked up from her maps, smiling as she noticed Chopper. The little doctor leaned in to whisper his wish.
"Why would you need something like that?" Nami asked with a curious blink, but Chopper flapped his arms wildly to get Nami to quiet down.
"I just need it!" he said depserately. "Please...!"
Nami glanced to Franky and Luffy not far away from her and then back to the little doctor tugging at her shirt while rubbing his face against it. She connected the dots and the plan made her smile. "Alright, alright!" Nami let out a huff with a fond shake of her head and rolled up her map. "Of course I can do something like that, Chopper!"
"Really?!" he exclaimed with large, sparkling eyes.
She giggled with a wink before pulling out her refined Clima Tact with a skilled twirl. "Just watch me, Chopper!"
Chopper bounced, waiting with bated breath. It took Nami a while to put together the thing he asked for and as he waited, Chopper was reminded of the Alabasta encounter. The fiery orange and yellow shades of the sunset brought him back to the memories of the first time he saw Ace fight.
The way he flew over those warships as if nothing in the world could hold him down, firing that amazing attack that destroyed all the marines in a single strike! Although they were nothing alike... Ace's actions that day reminded the little reindeer of Dr. Hiriluk. A man who pursued his desired without any restraints— the both of them were alike in the sense that nothing would stop them from doing what they wanted.
The connection made Chopper smile. I'm...a doctor. I'm someone who set out on the path to cure all diseases. He let out an easing breath, looking towards Luffy with a somber gaze. That laughter, that smile, it was all so different from the ones Chopper had looked up to from the moment he was offered a position in the crew.
If I can't even help my captain... I have no right to call myself a doctor!
Burning with conviction, the hours slipped by. Chopper joined the rest of the crew to turn in for the night— save for Zoro who had the first watch— and looked back to Robin who was going off with Nami to the ladies room. She gave him a reassuring smile and a firm nod before turning the corner with a small wave.
So Chopper climbed into bed, watching the sway of the bunk above him while brushing the edges of his hat against his stomach. The memories he shared with Dr. Hiriluk was filling his mind as he laid restlessly in bed. The similarities between the little doctor's father-figure and his captain was evident as well.
They both smiled for the sake of keeping others happy. But to Chopper...it was a very sad thing that the two had in common. It meant they were hiding something...like how Dr. Hiriluk was hiding his illness.
Chopper pushed his hat off of his stomach and turned to his side, remembering the doctor's words:
"I'll become the all-purpose medicine! I'll become a doctor who can cure anything!"
Tears filled Chopper's eyes as he remembered the desperation from that day. The day he almost lost sight of himself after Dr. Hiriluk's death.
"Because...there's no disease in this world that can't be cured!"
Grief was a pain that no medicine could cure. The realization hit Chopper as his eye lids grew heavy.
Even...even if I can't cure it... I can help. He smiled faintly, burying his face in his hat. A doctor is someone who helps people.
"Doctor... Doctorine... I'm going...to help...my friends..."
And with a light snore, he drifted off to sleep.
— X —
Chopper woke up with a jolt to the sound of creaking. At first, he thought it was Sanji since the cook always went to bed late, but...the light sound of straw sandals hitting the floor made Chopper know instantly who it was.
Luffy...
His captain stepped out of the room, closing the door with a slow creak. Chopper shot up in his bed, only to find a few of the others awake. "Sanji! Zoro! Frankly, too?" he exclaimed in a sharp whisper, still hearing the snores of Usopp and Brook.
"Hey, Chopper." Sanji smiled faintly before looking towards the room door again with a sigh. "He just can't seem to sleep the entire night."
"I don't think he ever fully sleeps," Franky commented, worried eyes fixated on the door as well. "You bros said that he's been doing this for a while! Doesn't he need help?"
Zoro's sharp glance was visible even in the darkness. "Do you think Luffy would want that? When he's trying so hard to seem normal?" Franky lowered his eyes. Zoro sighed, crossing his arms with a grumble. "What I mean to say is... Be discreet. Don't try to make a big deal out of it until Luffy is ready to admit it all to us himself."
Chopper stared at the older guys talking for a moment before jumping up with a jolt of realization. "Ah! I forgot!" he exclaimed sharply and scurried out of the room, leavin gthe rest of the male crewmembers in a dust of confusion.
Robin should be done with everything by now!
He hurried out onto the grassy deck, chest heaving for air as he looked around for Luffy. Chopper spotted Luffy laying in the shadows of the deck. Chopper touched his chest, a twist of pain, and his lips quivered with unshed tears burning his eyes. "Luffy..." With one cautious step after another, the little reindeer approached the captain with gentle care.
"Luffy. Luffy. Are you okay...?" Chopper asked softly, finding Luffy laying there with his eyes open. "I-I... Um... It's cold...so I have a surprise...for you..." he continued slowly after not receiving a response from his captain.
Luffy released a soft breath, turning to face Chopper with a faint smile and a distant gaze. "What are you doing awake, Chopper?" he asked, dodging the mention of a surprise from the little doctor. "You...usually sleep alot..." Luffy added quietly.
Chopper opened and closed his mouth, he was unsure of what to say. Although Doctorine was a specialist in physical medical practices, she was merely proficient in mental medical studies. But it was something she made sure Chopper learned because...
Mental pain hurts a hell of a lot more than physical pain. Chopper swallowed his nerves, determined to lead Luffy up to the crow's nest.
"I do. But tonight I wanted to make sure you saw what Robin and I got ready for you in the crow's nest!" he exclaimed, his voice wavering through the soft winds with a gentle joy. Chopper tried his best to put on a bright smile and stretched an arm out towards the crow's nest while grabbing Luffy with the other. "Luffy! You mentioned that you had a secret base treehouse AND a fort of your own back on your home island! Think of this as something like that!"
"Chopper—"
"I never had a chance to do any of that!" Chopper flinched as the words escaped his mouth, the arm pointing in the direction fo the crow's nest fell to his side as his blue nose twitched with a sniffle of tears. "I...lived fifteen years...with only Dr. Hiriluk...and Doctorine as my family...! But then, Luffy! I met you! You gave me more friends and a whole entire family that I can help protect!"
Luffy's eyes grew wide as Chopper's tears touched his hand.
Chopper rubbed at his eyes, sniffling. "Back then...going fishing with a friend was a dream. Traveling the world was a far-fetched dream! But you made all of these things that I thought were impossible come true!" He shifted into his Heavy Point, taking Luffy by the hand with a teary eye and a watery giggle. "So come on! I'll show you that dreams CAN become reality!"
At the doctor's words, Luffy was ushered along and pushed to climb up into the crow's nest. As Chopper followed behind, he blinked, noticing an ear by the entrance vanish into an array of petals. Robin must've left while Chopper was talking to Luffy.
Thank you, Robin.
Chopper changed back into his normal form once he reached the top, spotting the magical scene that Robin had gotten ready for them. The largest window in the crow's nest was open, curtains fluttering with the salty breeze of the sea that surrounded them. A little makeshift tent was pitched up by the window and floating around the set up was an array of red bubbles— the Heat Balls that Chopper had Nami summon for them.
"Wh-What's all of this for?" Luffy took a step back, expression twisted into a look of uncertainty.
But Chopper jumped with confidence that this plan would work. That it would help Luffy smile just a little more honestly again. He took Luffy's hand and smiled up at him. "Doesn't it...remind you of something?"
Luffy didn't respond, lowering his head with a quivering lip.
"It's like that night in Alabasta!" Chopper pulled Luffy along, sitting him right by the tent and in front of a Heat Ball. "After such blazing-hot weather...we entered the cold night of the desert... You sat right here, beside me." Chopper sat next to Luffy, turning his eyes towards the stars.
He felt Luffy stiffen as he leaned against him. Chopper smiled softly as he glanced at his captain. "And then both you and Usopp tried to use me as a warmer! Just because you guys are cold and even though there was a fire!" Chopper patted his legs with cheek puffed out in frustration. "But then we all fell asleep. Tired from walking all day and working through the heat."
Chopper turned around, facing Luffy with a smile. "I'm your doctor, Luffy. I know...that I'm supposed to help you feel better, but there are things that I still don't know too." He stretched out his arms, hugging Luffy tightly even though his captain's frame stiffened. "But...just know this... More than one person can give you comfort."
That was something on Chopper's mind as he watched Ace and Luffy interact in the past— how comfortable Luffy was around Ace. Something like brotherhood was so foreign to Chopper, someone who never had friends while growing up, and witnessing the brothers interact on the Going Merrry back then...was strange.
It was strangely comforting.
"If it can help Luffy...then I don't mind being a monster!"
Chopper lowered his gaze as he remembered his words after finding out about Luffy's 3D2Y message in the paper. It was at that point he noticed...how important the crew became to him. They had only been sailing for a few months, but every hour, every moment with the crew was special.
Luffy allowed Chopper to accept all of his strange points that way. The fact that he was a blue-nosed reindeer, the fact that he was a devil fruit eater, the fact that he spoke. All of the traits that he was hated for in the past became something special with Luffy.
"I-I might not ever...understand...what it's like...to have a brother..." Chopper's eyes grew watery as his lips quivered with the unshod tears. "B-But I'm here to help, Luffy! So please...if you need care, reach out. If you have trouble sleeping, reach out! What kind of doctor would I be if I can't help my captain when he needs it?"
With slow and shaking hands, Luffy reached up, wrapping his arms around the little reindeer with a tremble in his shoulders. "Chopper...! Thanks... Thanks so much...!"
At those words, Chopper hoped that...even for a moment, Luffy's pain was eased.
So he smiled, reaching up to pat Luffy's head. "Mm! Leave it to me!"
With the faint scent of lavender filling the crow's nest, Luffy managed to ease into sleep that night. Chopper stared out the window as he drifted off into sleep, catching sight of the stars lining up to make Dr. Hiriluk's goofy grin. The doctor had always believed that most illnesses laid within the pain of the heart, so Chopper giggled softly as he snuggled up in his blankets.
"Did I do good, Doctor?"
And he faded off into a gentle slumber with a teary smile.
— X —
"Here!" Chopper held out a small pouch to Luffy as the two of them woke up the next morning.
Luffy blinked with confusion, but Chopper grinned happily. "Um..." Luffy took the pouch with an unsure expression. "What is it?" He asked, picking up a flowery smell from the pouch.
Bouncing with delight, the little doctor answered, "It's filled with dried lavender! It's something that helps you sleep better!" he said joyfully. "So promise to keep it nearby, okay?"
With a stifled laugh, Luffy looked up from the little gift with an unsure smile that was speckled with happiness. "Okay, okay. I will."
It made Chopper happy to see Luffy happy, even if it was a brief moment of honesty. All of the studying, learning, and experience it was worth it if it made Luffy smile just a little more honestly. So no matter how long it takes, no matter how many hours of the night he has to burn through...Chopper will hold his books close and learn.
Because if it made Luffy smile, it was all worth the pain of their two year separation.
"Hey, food's ready!" Franky called up the ladder.
"Oh! Come on, Chopper!" Luffy took the reindeer's hoof and pulled him towards the ladder.
Chopper laughed before following along. "Okay!"
Heyo! Chapter 7!
I feel like Chopper's chapter was less of the gut-punching hurt/comfort I wanted to grasp but...I don't know. Anyways, his chapter was a lot longer than the others because...Chopper is the youngest. He still needs help and he's still unsure about so many things, especially because of his lonely years on Drum Island.
Hope I captured him well enough!
Look forward to the next chapter (which is probably going to take quite a while...) about our big-brain queen, Robin!
Her chapter is titled: The One She Lived For.
Thank you for reading and all of your kind reviews! I read all of them, so if you have any ideas or pointers, drop ''em there! The only cure to writer's block is an outside opinion so...
Anyways, continue to favorite, follow, and review! I hope you are enjoying this fic and let's plow through right to the end!
Until next time!