Chapter One

It had been three years since Train left. I can't say I understand his reasons for leaving us. Actually, there was a lot about Train that I didn't understand. He was a free spirit, never willing to be tied down to anyone or anything. The man who would have stayed in one place died with the woman called Saya…

Now, the Black Cat is just a stray, ever wandering, ever looking for his next meal, never caring to stay in one place for too long. That was the impression that I got of him when he left our side after he saved me from the Zero Numbers. I never got to thank him for that. That was one thing that bothered me.

Several things happened after that. Sven and I became full time partners, and although I wasn't allowed to have a license until I was fifteen, he treated me as an equal. I always appreciated that. He worried about me like a father would, though, and truth be told, I also appreciated that.

It showed that he loved me. It feels good to be loved, to have your existence affirmed, to know that you're more than just a mindless killing machine. I'm sure Train felt like that around Saya, too. She treated him like a human, and not just as the demonic Black Cat. Another thing that happened was the promise I made to myself, and although I never told Sven, the promise was for him as well.

I promised that I'd become stronger. Strong enough never to need to be protected like I did from the Zero Numbers ever again. I wanted to be as strong as Sven. As strong as Train. So strong that I would never be helpless again.

But I felt helpless. For as much as I said that I didn't care where Train went, I missed him. He was an indispensible part of the team. Although I hated him at first for what he represented to me, I came to realize how badly he wanted to leave that past behind. I realized how similar he was to me. We were both raised as killers, and we both abandoned that past.

But it's impossible to leave something behind without traces of it still being left. And so, just like with my memories of every single person I ever killed, Train had Creed. Creed, the one man he still wanted to kill. Creed, the man who represented everything that Train hated about Chronos, and about himself.

It was frightening to see the look in Train's eyes when he saw that silver haired man. It forced me to relive the night that he had broken into Rudman's estate and attempted to assassinate me. That was the first time up until then that I had truly felt fear. I couldn't move for shaking. I saw the murder in his eyes, and knew that I was way out of my depth.

The Black Cat wasn't someone that anyone, even a monster like myself could stand up to and walk away from unscathed. Even if no physical scars were left, those eyes will always burn in my mind. That gleaming golden stare, so like a cat's, yet so full of the conviction to kill. That was why it surprised me so much when that stare wavered.

His eyes changed momentarily, and left me wondering if he really was prepared to pull the trigger. Was it because I was a child? Maybe because I was a girl? I knew even then that even if I was a girl and a child, I didn't want to be treated differently just for those reasons. However, I felt immeasurable relief as he lowered the gun and left.

However, I digress. It seems I easily get drawn into my memories. I feel like an old woman reliving her youth… Hehehe… Is that what I have been reduced to? I can't let that happen just yet. I'm only 16, after all, and I've only just gotten my license one year ago on my fifteenth birthday.

So, I bring us to a day that stands out so strongly in my memory because it was the day that my world became whole once more.

The day that Train came back. It was just an ordinary day, to be perfectly honest. It was back when I was still only sixteen. The sky was clear, and as we were in the Northeastern hemisphere, and it was autumn, the leaves on the trees were brilliant shades of yellows, oranges, reds and browns.

Leaves occasionally blew off the trees and swirled around with a gust of wind, or were picked up off the ground with said gust along with small amounts of dust, and other debris. The air was clear and dry, and although it was cool out, I only wore a sweatshirt, as I had been running a lot earlier, and was still a bit hot from that.

We had just set our sights on a target… Vinny Francesco, your average arsonist who had racked up a number of murder charges as well, and had managed to break out of prison three times. I sort of wondered what the deal was with prison guards that they couldn't keep an eye on their quarry.

However, I kept my comments to myself, and as I slowly approached Francesco, trying to avoid looking directly at him for fear of setting him off, I heard…

"Hey! Vincent Francesco!" The arsonist looked up, and so did I, I in shock at the familiarity of the voice that had called my target's name.

"Your luck just ran out! I am here to arrest you! Put your hands up!" Yep. That was Train, alright. He was the same as ever. Just as reckless as when we parted ways. But for some reason, I couldn't help but laugh at his ridiculous antics, especially the look of surprise on his face when Francesco ran.

"Hey! Get back here, you no good, lousy…" Train cut himself off and started running… And so did I. I was after Train, though. I tried to keep the man in my line of sight, but even after three years, he was still as fast and strong as ever… And why shouldn't he have been.

He was only 26, and he was the Black Cat. Finally, I heard a growl of frustration and a loud THUD, and saw Train wrestling Francesco into handcuffs. Train hadn't noticed me yet, and I didn't expect him to. After all, he was fighting Francesco every step of the way, through cursing, spitting and kicking. When he finally got the man into the cuffs, I walked over and laughed.

"You never change, do you Train?"

"Whatever it is you think I did, you can't prove it!" Train shouted, looking up at me. But suddenly, his face went blank, and I could see that he was as surprised to see me as I had been to see him on that beautiful Autumn day.

"Princess…" He said, just kneeling there, still nearly ripping the newly caught reprobate's arm off. I could vaguely hear the man cursing in pain, trying to wriggle out of Train's viselike grip, but to no avail.

"You should loosen your grip on him, before you break his arm, Train…" I laughed. I wanted to laugh again at the look he gave me when I did laugh. He was blushing. I had never seen that reaction from him. It was kind of cute, and I found myself blushing slightly, too.

"R-right… W-were… You chasing him, too?" Train asked me. He was still staring at my face as though I had two heads. I sighed and took out a mirror that I used to see around corners, and looked at my face.

"Alright, Train, I know I don't have any zits on my face. What are you staring at?" I asked, pointing irately at him. At this, Train shook his head, and looked away.

"I-it's nothing! I-I was just a little surprised t-to see you!" He said back enthusiastically. I could sort of tell he was lying, but I wasn't ready to call him on it. We had only just come across each other again.

"Okay, then. Why don't you and I bring Francesco in, and we can go see Sven together…"

"W-wha!? Oh…" Suddenly, Train had a guilty look on his face, and he glanced away nervously. All these new expressions didn't suit Train at all.

"Y-you see… I-I have no intention of seeing Sven again. I didn't even intend on seeing you here. It really was just a coincidence that we were pursuing the same target… D-don't look at me like that, Princess!" Train said defensively.

I had no idea what he was talking about. What look was I giving him? Did I maybe look hurt, or angry? Upset? Frustrated? You'd think I'd be more or less justified in feeling like that… Especially when Train was being so thickheaded.

"Train, please… I know Sven would be happy to see you… And… Things aren't the same without you…"

"Yeah. I'm sure you have a lot more money now that I'm gone, don't you?" Train asked. I couldn't believe he was saying that. It was true that he sometimes botched our sweeps, but even without Train, we didn't have a perfect record. Who did, after all?

"Train. Will you at least let me join you on the way to turn in Francesco?" I asked, still hoping to convince him to join us again. He thought for a moment. I could tell he was hesitant. But finally, he nodded and stood up, walking off with Francesco. I smiled and followed after him.

"So, Train… What have you been doing these three years? We haven't seen hide nor hair of you." I said jokingly. Train sighed. He didn't seem in the mood to talk. However, he finally took a breath and said, "Well, just travelling really. I've brought in a few bounties. It's harder to work alone than it is with two other people… Hehehe…"

"Hey, when you two are done flirting, couldja move a little faster? If I hafta go to prison, anyhow, I might as well get there sooner rather than later…"

"Huh?" Train asked irritably, looking at Francesco with a glare. "It's usually the criminal's job to shut the hell up… Besides, who's flirting, anyhow?" Train asked somewhat threateningly, banging his fist on Vinny's head, causing the man to exclaim a shout of pain, and glower at Train.

"Please, Train! Just come visit us for a little while? I promise you don't have to stay. But Sven misses you, too…"

"Wait… He misses me too? Why would you miss me? You never even liked me."

"Don't go deciding for me who I do and don't like!" I replied, blushing slightly. I could tell I was blushing because my face was heating up, and for some reason, I was starting to wish I was anywhere but there. "What gave you the impression that I didn't like you?" I continued. Train sighed and shook his head at me.

"Just your general attitude toward me. You don't have to lie. I understood why you didn't like me. I did try to kill you a few times, after all. I don't expect you to just forget that. Besides, half the reason that I stayed with you and Sven was because it helped me with my desire to take revenge on Creed." Train said to me. I kind of hoped that he was lying. I didn't want to think that he was just using us, a means to an end.

"What was the other half of your reason?" I asked, raising an eyebrow. I hoped desperately that it was a good hearted reason. He always seemed like a good person to me, even when he was trying to kill me. But I could smell the blood on him. The blood of countless murders. However, I could also see the hesitation in his eyes. Hesitation to kill me. Whether it was merely because I was a girl or a child, or if it was because he was ready to give up murdering, I don't know.

However, I knew when he came in the second time that he wasn't prepared to kill me, and unlike the first time, I wasn't afraid. I felt bad for him, because I understood his situation. Trapped in a place that he hated, forced to work for a cause in which he didn't believe. Sent to do the work of evil people. Was that when I first fell in love with him?

Maybe I loved him even before I learned to trust him. It doesn't make sense, even now, even to myself, but I have the strongest feeling that was when I fell for the notorious Black Cat, even though I knew he would never return the sentiment. After all, what was I to him but a child, and a monster?

"I was happy…" Train said, looking uncommonly sentimental. It was a simple answer, but it shocked me all the same. "I enjoyed spending time with you and Sven, and Rinslet, and all the other people that I came to know. If you or Sven had asked me to stop chasing Creed… I don't know if I could have refused. Perhaps you were more understanding than I deserved."

"You seem different, Train. It's like our time apart has turned you into a new person… And I'm not sure whether or not it's even a good thing." I replied, putting a hand on Train's shoulder. The blush he showed when I did didn't escape me. I thought it was strange that he would react like that. I had already convinced myself a long time ago that Train would never love me, so that thought didn't cross my mind at the time. Maybe it was the same for Train.

Perhaps he had convinced himself that for whatever reason, nobody would ever love him. Was it because of what Saya had said to him? He told me once that on the night she was murdered, just as she was about to die, she told him that she had been planning to leave town.

I could see how hurt he looked when he said that. Had he been planning to confess his feelings for her that night? If so, that must have been a real kick in the teeth, as they say. Maybe after that, he stopped believing that anyone ever would love him.

That thought made me profoundly sad, and lonely for some reason, and I could feel tears threatening to fall. It wasn't simple pity. I don't think Train would appreciate knowing that anyone, much less someone he counted as a teammate felt sorry for him.

However, I did sympathize. Maybe it was because deep down, I always hoped that even if he didn't return my feelings, that at least he would recognize them for what they were. Was that foolish? Was that selfish of me? Even when I knew he was still mourning over Saya, I wanted him to notice me, though I knew I couldn't expect such a thing. So, I covered up my feelings with sarcastic scorn. Perhaps I only made things worse.

"Little Princess?" Train asked, stopping on the precipice of the door to the bounty collection office.

"Yes?" I asked. My voice caught in my throat. What was he planning to ask me? Was it going to be serious, or one of his usual foolish questions that for some reason, always made me smile, even if I refused to show it until I was alone?

"What did you think of me? I still wear this bell… The one that you gave me." Train said quietly, seeming nervous yet somehow hopeful for some reason. "You said it was so I couldn't sneak up on you, so I assumed that you didn't trust me, and since you never said I could take it off, I kept it on, if only to ensure that you were still comfortable around me…"

"Train! That isn't a fair question! Of course I didn't trust you! You tried to kill me! That doesn't mean that I don't trust you now! You're… You're…" I wanted to say 'the love of my life'. But I couldn't bring myself to tell him that. I didn't want him to be repulsed by me, and leave again. I was trying to keep him with us, not scare him away. Train looked at me expectantly, so I said the only thing I could.

"You're one of my best friends. I would trust you with my life, and I feel certain that you would trust me with yours if it came to it." That much at least was true. I would trust him with my life. I felt certain that I could trust him with anything… So why was I so scared to reveal my true feelings? Why did it hurt so much to think that he might reject me, or worse, think less of me for my feelings? I always prided myself on being uncommonly rational.

But these thoughts were so irrational, so unfounded and based on fear that it made me feel like a complete fool. Was this how everyone who was in love felt? Did fear go hand in hand with love? When my heart skipped a beat and my face heated up with blood when I saw Train, or when he talked to me or smiled at me, was it normal to feel like I was going to throw up?

Was it alright to feel terrified that he was going to notice and scorn me for it? If it did go hand in hand with love, I wasn't sure at the time if I ever wanted to be in love. It seemed to me, at the time, such a foolish emotion.

Before I realized it, we had turned in Francesco, and were walking out of the bounty office, Train with the money in hand. I looked briefly at it. It didn't matter so much to me, but Sven had been counting on it so that we could eat normally again. I was hoping to get Train to come back. Although he did seem very eccentric, still, he handled the sweep pretty easily on his own.

"Train…" I said before realizing it. I clamped my hand over my mouth, but I had already said it. He looked over at me.

"A-are you sure you won't come back with us, even just for lunch? It's such a nice day, we could eat out." I was even prepared to pay for his lunch out of the money that I usually saved away for my books and things like that, if I could even get to spend a tiny bit longer with the man I loved so much. I was sure that he would never love me. But maybe I could get him to want to be friends with us again.

"Princess…" Train replied to me. It was a strange nickname that Train had given me. 'Princess'. At least he didn't call me 'Little' Princess anymore. But for some reason, the name made me feel close to Train again. It made me feel wanted by him.

"It's not that I don't want to see Sven again. It's just… It's already hard enough to leave again now that I've seen you. Now you want me to go see Sven, and we're going to have lunch, and start talking. Conversations about old times will come up, and before I know it, I won't be able to leave anymore. I won't be a burden on you and Sven anymore." That gave me an idea, though.

I hated to have to resort to such trickery, but I had learned a few things by watching Rinslet work. I put on my sweetest face I could muster, feeling disgusted that I would do this to Train, but not able to stop myself from going all out to bring him home, even for a little while.

"Please, Train?" I asked, giving him puppy dog eyes, and sniffling a bit, like I was crying, and dragging out the question as long as I could. Then I added, "For me?" Even though I didn't like to think that I would ever resort to something so low, I knew that I had gotten him.

It had been proven a long time ago that a woman's tears were her greatest weapon, even against the notorious Black Cat. I could see him struggling against his own willpower, but finally, he gave up and said, "Fine. Just for a few hours, though…" He said, his shoulders sagging in defeat. I felt bad… But at the same time, an indescribable sense of victory overcame my senses, and I felt a rush such as I had not in years.

The two of us walked back toward Sven's and my Belsam hideout together. It was such a beautiful day, and I felt I was in no rush to get anywhere, as long as I had Train with me once again. Train didn't look nearly so happy, although he smiled at me now and again.

I wondered what was bothering him. It was clear that it wasn't just Train wanting to be free, or that he wanted not to be a burden. There was something deeper than that about this, and I would find out.