AN: We hear from Edward again, as he and Bella come face-to-face. A little canon behavior, some sound advice from his Dad, a little match-making from Esme and and an epiphany.

Thanks as always to MeteorOnAMoonlessNight, Midnight Cougar and ghostreader24 for their help with each and every chapter.

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Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight and all its characters. I'm just playing with them.

Deceit and Destiny Chapter 40

Edward

Being in the same town as Bella was playing havoc with my mind. I imagined her everywhere, and a couple of times in the days after her prenatal appointment, I found myself driving past her house. Maybe it wasn't ethical, but the moment I saw her notes on my screen, my mind memorized her address without permission; I couldn't forget it if I tried.

Despite the everlasting imaginary itch between my shoulder blades making me squirm with expectation, and the tension of knowing she was so near and yet so far, I was enjoying my new job. Having spent most of the last ten years around busy cities, I found the pace of life in a smaller town refreshing.

Moving to Port Angeles had given Esme the chance to retire from her senior OBGYN position in a Sacramento hospital. Now, she'd thrown herself into the purchase of a house and its decoration like a frustrated interior designer.

My phone rang not long after I returned from my run, something I'd neglected since moving to Port Angeles. In San Francisco, I used the time it took me to get to and from work to unwind from the stresses and tensions of a busy job, but I wasn't yet into the habit again.

"Edward." Esme's excited voice came through the loudspeaker.

"Morning, Es. What can I do for you?"

"Are you free by any chance?"

"Right now, yes. I'm not due at work until later today."

"I'd love your opinion on a house your father and I are thinking of buying."

"I thought you'd be renting for a while," I answered.

"Well . . . we're looking for something more permanent. But your father's busy this morning. You know how he is; he'd live in a shed if I asked him to, and I'd love another viewpoint."

"No problem, Es. I just returned from a run, so I need a quick shower first."

"Okay, will you meet me there? It's seventy-two Sycamore Lane."

"I'll be there in about forty minutes, all right?"

"Perfect. I'll see you soon. Love you."

After she'd given me the address, I ended the call and made my way through the bedroom to the en suite to the shower. I figured I could go from the house to the hospital, so I dressed ready for my shift and headed out the door.

It didn't take me long to find the house on Sycamore Lane since nothing in Port Angeles was too far away. I parked at the curb behind a nondescript white vehicle, which I assumed belonged to someone from the agency, and looked up at the front of the house. It was a pleasant property and I could see Esme and Dad living here. I climbed out of my car, shutting and locking the door before making my way up the garden path to the front door.

I knocked lightly, and after a minute, the door swung open, leaving me face-to-face with the woman who haunted my sleeping and waking hours. For a heartbeat, we stared at each other. She looked so good and smelled amazing, and I had to mentally glue my feet to the floor to stop myself from stepping forward to hug her.

Her smile seemed genuine as she invited me inside, and suddenly, inexplicably, I was angry that she could be so cool and poised while I felt shaken by her presence.

"What are you doing here?" My voice came out harsher than I'd intended.

"I work at Volturi Realty, and Didi wasn't available this morning to give Esme a second showing, so I stepped in," she said pleasantly.

There was part of me that wanted to turn and run, but I couldn't give her the satisfaction of showing how much she affected me. Not giving her a chance to say anything more, I brushed past her, grumbling, as I headed upstairs as fast as possible while trying to ignore the tingle caused by her proximity.

"Hey, Es," I called as I got to the top. "Where are you?"

"In here, Edward, in the en suite off the green bedroom."

I followed the sound of her voice, finding her in a large south-facing room at the front of the house. Drawn to the window, I looked out over the front yard, catching Bella looking up at the house. Stepping back out of sight, I watched as Bella turned to speak to a young woman with a little girl.

Esme called me at that moment, and I reluctantly left Bella to her friend, though my mind was on her, wondering what she was talking about, who the other woman and girl were. Finally, I had to admit to myself that I was curious about her life and how the people I'd met fit into it.

"What do you think of this bedroom, Edward?" Esme's question broke through my thoughts of Bella. "I think it, like most of the home, needs updating a little, but I love the en suite."

Pushing her out of my mind for the moment, I looked around the room as I stepped through the door.

"It would look better with a lighter color on the walls, but I don't know anything about decorating, so don't ask me which one. It's nothing like the house in Sacramento."

Esme stood in the bathroom doorway, and I made my way over toward her, peering around the doorframe into the room.

"The bathroom is big enough to fit a separate shower cubicle if you wanted to, but everything looks new, so it doesn't need much work. How many bedrooms?" I asked.

"Four, but I think I could turn one into a large study for your father. I know I joked about him living in a shed, but I don't really want to banish him to the end of the garden." We grinned at each other, knowing Dad wouldn't care one way or the other.

I followed her through to the rear of the house, looking down at the back yard. "There's plenty of outside space, too. You could even put in a deck and a hot tub," I suggested.

"And did you see that kitchen? And the family room? There's plenty of space for us to entertain, and you never know what's in the future," she said slyly. "It's even big enough for a wedding reception."

I huffed a laugh and kissed her on the cheek. "Stop matchmaking, Es. I'm capable of finding my own partner, and I'm sure Rose would tell you the same."

"Hmm, it has a lot of potential, and I really do like the space," Esme mused. "I think I'm going to tell Carlisle I want to put in an offer."

Since I wouldn't be living here, Esme hadn't needed to ask my opinions, but I liked the inclusion in their lives nonetheless. We made our way downstairs, and I found myself looking out the living room window, watching Bella again when Esme came to stand beside me.

"Oh, that's Bella Black from the Volturi Agency. They were the ones who helped me find your apartment for you," she said. "I can introduce you, if you like?"

"It's fine, thanks, Es. I have to head to work anyway," I murmured without turning away from the window.

"Don't forget dinner tonight, okay? I'll see you later."

Not expecting an answer from me, she headed out of the room.

Hearing Esme call her Bella Black stabbed at me, and I found myself wondering what her relationship was like with her husband. I remembered her notes from the ER detailing the fallout from a domestic dispute. It included bruises and cuts, and I'd caught sight of the scar on her arm during her prenatal appointment. Was that something to do with him?

My feet moved toward the front door without conscious thought, and I stepped outside into the weak sunshine, stopping as the little girl's loud voice sounded in the clear afternoon air.

"You got a baby like Momma, Auntie Bella?"

Bella laughed, the sound lifting the corners of my mouth. "Yes, Sophie, I have one, too."

Hearing her talk about the child she carried was a sharp reminder that not only had she and her husband made another child together, but she had a son; a family. The realization that there was no room for me in her life hit me hard, and I rubbed my chest at the pain that shot through me. My heart plummeted at the thought of their intimacy, their life together. Did she love him? Did they laugh together? Go out on dates? Make love? My gut twisted at that last thought, and I had to push away the sudden anger at how she'd put me in this position—on the outside looking in.

I wondered when I'd cease to be angry, and conversely, when the day would come when I wouldn't want her. The other woman's gaze met mine, and Bella turned around, taking a step forward.

Alarmed, I took a step back. I was definitely not in the right place to even contemplate speaking to her. The sound of Esme behind me broke the gaze between Bella and me.

"All done, Es?" The smile on my face felt like a grimace, and I was pretty sure Esme knew it wasn't genuine, but she didn't call me out on it. When she nodded, I walked swiftly down the path past Bella.

Even the slightest touch spread warmth through me that had been lacking in my life, and I practically ran toward my car. I could feel her essence, her light, drawing me in, pulling me toward her.

I wouldn't call it running, but I hurriedly climbed into my car before I succumbed, and although I wasn't ready to talk to her, I chanced a glance in her direction, finding her already turned back toward her friend.

I knew there needed to be a conversation between the two of us at some point, or I'd never be able to move forward.

~ oOo ~

My shift was quiet, with only one delivery and one false alarm sent home after I'd assured her she wasn't in active labor, something that would never have happened in San Francisco. With my mind on Bella, I headed over to Dad and Esme's place for the dinner I'd missed earlier this week.

I would have preferred to spend the evening at home, but I recognized I was attempting to hide myself away and wallow in my thoughts of Bella, so instead of going home to change, I headed straight to Dad and Esme's place. They were both at home, their cars in the driveway, though Rose wasn't here yet.

Esme had always told me there was no need to knock, but I felt somehow awkward just walking in, so I tapped twice, then opened the door and headed through to the kitchen.

"Is that you, Edward?" Esme's voice called from the kitchen.

I poked my head around the doorway. "Nope, it's the King of England."

"Well, in that case, good evening, Your Royal Highness," she said straight-faced before giving me a wide smile. "Dinner will be ready in an hour or so, and—" She grinned, and I was immediately suspicious.

"What have you done, Esme?" I asked.

"We have a guest. A young lady who works at the health food market on First Street. She was so sweetly helpful to me, and she's new to the area, too, like all of us. Her name is Lucy Maxwell, and I hope you'll make her feel very welcome."

I groaned out loud. "Esme, please tell me you're not matchmaking."

"Of course not, Edward. But I thought you might like the company, so indulge me. Please?"

I sighed. Neither she nor Dad had any idea of the reason Tanya and I had gone our separate ways, and I wasn't going to enlighten them. I was nowhere near ready to date anyone, especially with Bella constantly on my mind.

"Where's Dad?"

"In his study. When you've finished, could you ask him to fetch a couple of bottles of wine for me, please?"

I nodded, and taking the stairs two at a time, I knocked lightly on the study door, then waited for his usua, "Come in," before pushing it open.

Dad had retired from his job as a surgeon a couple of years ago, but instead of getting out his pipe and slippers and puttering about in the garden, he'd opened his own business selling marijuana. He would've preferred to move somewhere hot so he could grow his own, but instead made sure he had a good supplier or two. I kept expecting him to grow his hair and start dressing in corduroy pants and a flowered shirt harking back to his hippy days.

"Evening, son. You're here early. Come and sit down."

"Hi, Dad," I said, taking a seat in front of the desk. "Yep, they let me out on good behavior, but I'm on call in case of emergencies. I have a whole evening to myself."

"That's good. I hear you're dining with us tonight? I believe Rose has invited her new man, Emmett."

"That's good; I like Emmett, and I think Rose does, too. It's time she found someone to treat her well, and I'd like to get to know him better, too."

"Esme tells me she has invited a young lady by the name of Lucy Maxwell. She says she isn't matchmaking, but you should watch out, Edward. I understand she's single."

"Dad, please. Not you, too? I neither need nor want a girlfriend. Can't you tell her to leave me alone," I whined.

"I'll do my best." Dad laughed. "Was there something you needed to talk to me about? Any problems with the job?"

"Well, the hospital is great. I like knowing almost everyone and being on first-name terms. Being on-call for Dr. Gerandy is fine, except—"

I was silent for a few minutes, wondering how to approach the subject of Bella. How much should I tell him?

"Spit it out, son. You know I'll help if I can."

"Thanks." I smiled briefly. "I know one of my patients . . . umm . . . fairly well, and I'm not sure I can have her as my patient at the office."

Dad looked at me quizzically. "Know, as in intimately?" he questioned.

I nodded. "I met her a few months ago, then we lost contact. We never talked about where she lived, and it's pure coincidence Jasper offered me a job in the same town she lives in. I ran into her a couple of days ago, and found out she was a patient of mine only yesterday."

"And, you like this young lady?" he asked.

I nodded. "It's complicated, Dad. She's sort of married, she has a son, and she's expecting a baby."

"Whoa, that's a lot of complicated, Edward. I can see why you might want to distance yourself. Do you want to talk about it?"

"Not really." I stood and paced in front of his desk. "I need to get how I feel sorted out in my mind. I know I should let her go, but there was something there. I didn't have all the facts at the time, and now I feel betrayed. And angry, and sad, all at the same time."

Dad was quiet for a few minutes, steepling his hands in front of him. "So, you have feelings for a patient. Has it been more than that? Is there a conflict?"

"That's about the size of it."

"Well, why don't you talk to Esme? She thinks I don't know, but she never changed her status to 'retired' and applied for a Washington State license before we left Sacramento." Dad winked. "Perhaps she'll agree to take this woman on as a patient? That might help you."

"Thanks, Dad, I'll think I'll speak to Esme now." I stood and opened the door. "Oh, and she asked if you could get a couple of bottles of wine for dinner."

"Will do. And, Edward . . ."

I stopped in the doorway.

"I urge you to talk to this woman. She must have had a reason to keep the facts from you, and the only way you're going to come to terms with it, whichever way you decide, is to find out the truth."

As I left his study, my mind fixed on what Dad had said. He was right; I did need to talk to Bella, or I'd still be brooding over the situation in six months. I needed to know the truth. I went looking for Esme, determined at least to do one thing toward sorting out my dilemma, finding her in the dining room setting the table.

"Here, let me do that, Es," I said. "How long until dinner?"

"Half an hour less than the last time you asked. What can I do to help you?"

"How did you know I wanted to ask you something?"

She cupped my jaw in her hand. "Because you've been troubled for a week, Edward, and I figured you'd talk about it when you're ready."

I took a seat at the table, Esme sitting opposite me.

Deciding to hand over Bella's care was the right thing to do, so I explained the situation—minus the intimate details and the name, of course.

"Dad tells me you have a Washington State license to practise. Would you consider taking on the obstetrician position at Dr. Gerandy's? I have a conflict of interest situation with one of the patients, and I can't treat her. I don't want to make her feel singled out by refusing to be her doctor, so would you be interested?"

Esme raised her eyebrows. "You know I'm retired, don't you?"

I nodded, waiting for her to continue.

"But, I do have that license because I didn't think I'd be happy not working at all. You know me; I like to be busy."

I nodded. "It's not full-time, so you'd have plenty of free time."

Esme looked at me. "Under the circumstances, I can see how it would be difficult for you. Do I need to know who this woman is?"

"No, I don't think so, at least not right now."

I was both relieved and saddened at the thought of removing those definite times to see Bella, but it was the best option if I was ever to find peace of mind. It definitely wasn't ethical to treat her, and I already felt guilty at allowing myself to carry out her prenatal appointment earlier this week, but I wasn't my usual self; my head was all over the place.

"It'll work out fine, Edward. Just talk to her." Esme stood and walked around the table, squeezing my shoulder, then left the room.

I wandered into the kitchen, the smells coming from in there making my mouth water and my stomach growl, but I resisted the impulse to grab a snack from the refrigerator. Instead, I settled for a beer, taking a seat at the breakfast bar and resting my head in my hand.

"So, you look like you've the weight of the world on your shoulders."

Startled, I spilled beer on the counter, turning to find Rose leaning against the doorframe.

"Shit, Rose, you startled me," I said, wiping my hand across the countertop and mopping up the spilled beer. "Where's Emmett?"

"He'll be here in about half an hour, but I figured I might as well get here early and see if Mom needs any help with dinner." She stepped farther into the kitchen, opening the refrigerator and pulling out a beer for herself. "What's up, Edward?"

I shook my head and shrugged. "Nothing, it's just been a long and difficult few days."

I picked at the edge of the label on my bottle, not looking at her. My sister could be perceptive, and I wasn't sure I could hide my feelings.

"Is that why you stood me up last week? You've been moody ever since." She took a seat beside me at the breakfast bar. "Come on, Edward. You know you can talk to me," she said, nudging my elbow. "A trouble shared and all that?"

"It's not something I can talk about, Rose; at least, not right now."

I stood, throwing the empty bottle in the recycle bin, grabbing a second from the refrigerator, and headed into the living room. Rose took a seat at the other end of the sofa, turning on the television, and flicking through the channels before settling on a rerun of Friends. She cocked her head to one side and looked at me, then gave me a short nod, telling me both that she would leave it for now, but that she also expected me to tell her everything soon.

"Okay," she agreed and changed the subject. "What do you think about Emmett?"

"He's a nice guy," I answered. "Why do you ask?"

"Bella . . . "

The sound of Bella's name from Rose had my heart jolting in my chest and my ears ringing, hearing nothing of the words that followed. I'm not sure what look was on my face, but I found myself grateful that Rose wasn't looking in my direction at that moment.

"Edward?" Rose sighed in exasperation. "You're not listening to me, are you?"

"What? Who's Bella?"

"I said, Bella's one of the girls I met at the bar a couple of weeks ago, the same night I met Emmett. He's a policeman, and after what happened with my father, you know I never wanted to get involved with anyone on the force."

When she looked at me, I put a smile on my face. "But you shouldn't give up on getting to know him, Rose," I said gently. "You never know when you might meet the love of your life."

I ignored the little voice telling me that I might have already met mine.

She smiled brightly back at me. "You're right, Edward, thanks. How about we have a dinner party to get to know everyone? I'll speak to Alice; she'll know who to invite." She'd forgotten I was even in the room as she pulled out her phone, presumably dialing Alice's number.

Half an hour later, the six of us—Esme and Dad, Rose and Emmett, and Lucy and myself—were seated around the dining table. Esme's pot roast sat in the center, making my stomach growl with hunger. I'd already been introduced to Lucy, who happened to be tall, slim, and blonde, much the same as Tanya, though prettier. Esme didn't know my type had changed the day I met Bella.

The meal passed without any drama, and although I was not looking for any relationship at all, I found Lucy easy to talk to, and we did have a lot in common. Emmett was funny, telling stories of some of the idiotic situations he'd found himself in as a police officer. Rose, despite her trepidation about entering into a relationship with someone who was in the force, seemed to be taken with Emmett.

"Hey, Edward. Did you get your car sorted out after that incident with Bella?" Emmett's mention of her name startled me.

Rose looked up. "What incident was that, Edward? I didn't know you'd met Bella," she said.

I picked up my glass and drained it of wine before I answered, trying to seem nonchalant when I was anything but. "I didn't really meet her; it was more a case of her car meeting mine. I merely went with her to the hospital as a kindness."

"She's fine, Edward. I saw her last week," Emmett said. "Apart from a broken nose and two spectacular black eyes from the airbag." He laughed. "They'll fade soon enough, though the nose will take a little longer. Charlie says the baby's fine, too."

Nothing more was said, though my mind whirled with another question. Who was Charlie? I constantly had to push Bella from my mind to concentrate on the conversation around the table.

At the end of the evening, I walked Lucy to the door alongside Rose and Emmett. They disappeared to where he'd parked his car, leaving me and Lucy on the front porch.

"I really enjoyed this evening, Edward, and I hope we can be friends. I'm pretty sure Esme was hoping we'd hit it off, but don't take offense; you're not my type." She stood on tiptoes to whisper in my ear. "I'm more likely to go for your sister."

I snorted, then laughed out loud. "Duly noted," I said. "I'd put in a word for you if she wasn't so wrapped up in Emmett."

"Thanks anyway, Edward. I'll see you around sometime."

I watched as she got into her car, waved, and drove off before I headed back indoors.

"You and Lucy seemed to hit it off well, Edward," Esme said, her eyes sparkling with anticipation.

"Yes, she's lovely, but I'm not her type." I grinned as Esme's face fell. "I'll leave her to tell you why." I looked at the clock on the wall. "Anyway, I have an early start in the morning, so I'll say goodnight."

I collected my jacket and keys, kissed Esme's cheek, and hugged Dad goodbye before climbing into my car and heading home.

Making my way to bed, my mind was whirling with thoughts of Bella and the situation I'd found myself in. I tossed and turned, and eventually sat up, switching on the light, allowing my mind to really think about her.

She'd seemed like such an honest person, and Dad said Bella had to have had her reasons for keeping the facts from me.

Was I only a vacation fling? That stung more than I thought it would, but I could've sworn there was more there between us—a connection. That night when we made love for the second time, there was something in her eyes. At the time, I couldn't put it into words, though I was certain I felt it too—whatever it was.

Why would she tell me it was safe for us not to use contraception? She'd been on the Depo-shot, so it was almost an impossibility for her to conceive. Why did it fail? With my near perfect recall, I closed my eyes and visualized Bella's details. She'd been on the shot for five years, since the birth of her son, given regularly and on time, except—the last one.

That got me thinking about the timing of her pregnancy. Her last shot had been late, which could be one of the reasons for its failure. True, it was only around ten days, but it could've been a factor. My heart beat a little faster and I felt light-headed at the realization that it was entirely possible.

Was it possible the baby she was carrying could . . . could it be mine?

Thinking back to that night, I remembered there was nothing but honesty in her gaze when she told me it was safe, and I was almost sure she wouldn't have wanted that if she hadn't thought she was covered and clean. She didn't strike me as the sort of person who would take an unnecessary risk, no matter what else was going on in her life.

Once the thought that the baby could be mine was in my head, I couldn't get rid of it, and the more I mulled it over, the more likely it seemed. And just maybe there was a little wishful thinking in there, too.

I fell asleep to the realization that both Esme and Dad were absolutely right. Despite my feelings of hurt, anger, and betrayal, I needed to know the truth. As I lay down again, I found myself wanting to have the courage to seek out Bella, and the heart to forgive her.

~ oOo ~