Another day in the life of the world's most unfortunate isekai character, Subaru finds himself alone in the capital of Lugnica. This is exciting, exciting, he convinces himself to smile. Emilia is having a meeting with Crush and being alone is a good thing because it gives him some time to buy her a present. Definitely a good thing, no other haunting thoughts in his mind. Not at all.
Ah~ His beating heart! He could only imagine the look of happiness on her face when she sees what he gets her.
What he's going to get? He's not sure. Maybe something sweet! Like chocolates? Wait, they are called chocolates in this world, right? Food names were always so weird here. Okay, maybe no food-related items without a guide. Oh! Maybe something cute? A cute present for an even cuter girl! He loved it. Maybe he could get her a stuffed bear? Or a bunny.
…Bunny…
Ok so maybe not something cute either. Come on, think of something. Something. Not about that. No, he wasn't struggling being out and alone the first time since sanctuary. Not at all, what gave you that idea.
After all, this wasn't the first time he was alone. He had his room when he slept at night. Sure, he had to keep himself quiet in fear that at any given moment someone could be passing by or choose to enter. Beako, the darling, may have visited him a few times to keep him company.
It wasn't like being surrounded by strangers he was any more alone than then. Totally. Nothing was wrong. Nothing was wrong!.
He found himself sitting against a wall in an alleyway. Really, a stupid move, considering his luck specifically in regards to being in alleyways, but he didn't clearly remember entering. He kinda just ended up here.
Oh, and his breath was all shaky and uneven. Funny thing, that. The hairs on the back of his neck were standing straight too. Oh, and he felt the strangest urge to glance behind his back to check if someone was watching him, even though he could feel the wall he was leaning on. How silly.
How silly, that.
"What are you doing here Subaru?" He asked himself aloud, "You can't be wasting any time. You have a present to buy."
He laughed bitterly.
"Really… Sitting here isn't going to fix anything…"
The visage of several dozen pairs of red glowing eyes flared in his mind and he flinched in on himself, closing his eyes and tucking his head into his arms.
The feeling of being watched returned. He stubbornly ignored it.
The words flowed out uncontrollably as he desperately tried to cling onto the loose fragments of his mind.
"Stop it. S-Stop it. Stop thinking about it. It's dead now. It didn't kill you. Different loop. Thinking about it will do no good. Only you remember it, and you can't tell anyone about it. She won't let you. So stop thinking about things that didn't happen."
Reinhard was at a bit of a loss. Felt-sama had ordered him away, said that she wanted some time without seeing his 'stupid face', which was understandable. However, she also told him to take the day off. But Reinhard never knew what to do while he was off-duty.
Being off-duty made him feel guilty. He felt didn't deserve it. It would be better for everyone if his time was spent helping people, to make up for the suffering he has caused.
So maybe he could take a stroll around the city. He wasn't patrolling, he was… what did Subaru call it? Site seeing? Yes, he was site seeing. He didn't know what exactly the term meant, but that was what he was doing. Site seeing. In the more dangerous areas of town. Coincidentally.
In the corner of his eye, he spotted a shaking figure sitting in an alleyway. Were they in trouble? It wasn't 'working' to help someone in need, so Felt-sama probably wouldn't get mad if he intervened. And if she did, he would just apologize profusely for it and hope she forgives him.
He steps into the alleyway. He freezes in place. He recognizes the figure. Subaru. Subaru. The memory of how he met Subaru flashes in his mind. Oh no. Something happened to Subaru. Something happened, and Reinhard failed to protect his friend. The realization kicked in and he was filled with guilt.
He should move. He should check Subaru for wounds and get him treated. He should. That's what a good friend would do. But Reinhard was frozen in place. Subaru was talking to himself, and Reinhard knew it was in ill character to eavesdrop, but the words Subaru was saying were far too daunting to gain anything but his full attention.
"Stop it. S-Stop it. Stop thinking about it. It's dead now. It didn't kill you. Different loop. Thinking about it will do no good. Only you remember it, and you can't tell anyone about it. She won't let you. So stop thinking about things that didn't happen." Terror, bitterness, hysteria. It was a side of Subaru that Reinhard had never seen before. One that hurt him to see. Not that it was Subaru's fault. No, it was Reinhard's, for how dare he fail to prevent his friend from feeling like this.
Something had indeed happened to Subaru, and he had been unable to protect his friend. Furthermore, Subaru didn't even have the confidence in Reinhard to feel that he could confide in him. Was Reinhard truly so lacking? Had he done something to convince his friend that he was not a reliable ear?
Or… The 'she' Subaru had mentioned. Reinhard's hands clenched into fists. Someone was threatening his friend. His chest flared with rage, which Reinhard kept contained. He did not want to scare Subaru when his friend was already so terrified.
But he did swear an oath to himself that he would do better. He would put an end to what was tormenting Subaru. Reinhard didn't have many friends. It felt a little bit embarrassing to admit, but Subaru, a person he had only met just a few times, was probably his best friend. He was finding himself to be a very protective friend.
"I don't know if I can take this anymore," Subaru said in the most broken voice Reinhard had ever heard.
That was enough, Reinhard took a step forward. He would shake Subaru from this awful state and ask him what had happened. No matter what, he would offer his assistance and would not take 'no' for an answer. He would apologize for overstepping after he was finished. Seeing his friend like this was motivation enough-
"How many times am I going to have to die to get my happy ending. Over and over again. When will the next loop begin? Time travel sounds fun but in reality, it's all garbage. Moments in time stolen as no one else remembers. It's not fair. It's not fair! I'm fine, I'm fine! I- No I'm not fine. How could I be fine talking to people who've killed me? Shut up Subaru, it's not their fault, they don't even remember."
Subaru continued to rant and Reinhard found himself frozen in place a second time. Simply struggling to process what had just been said. All of this talk of dying… Spirits! Reinhard wasn't hearing the winds of untruth, nor was his Divine Protection of Mental Instability Detection flaring anywhere near enough for it to be a delusion. Which meant… Which meant…
Subaru had died. Multiple times.
How? Why? How did Reinhard not know about thi-
'She.'
'She' had been stopping Subaru from telling anyone. Reinhard couldn't possibly imagine how painful that must have been, to suffer alone like that. Still, how had this all happened without someone seeing it-
All the mentions of time travel finally caught up to him. If time had rewound then even if people had seen the deaths, they wouldn't remember. But still… Why?
Why would someone do this? What benefit would tormenting Subaru like this cause? Who would do such a thing?
But then, Reinhard caught on to what Subaru had said about his killers not remembering. It was incredibly unlikely the people killing him had been responsible for time rewinding, in that case.
That made things even worse. Reinhard's stomach twisted as he gained an even clearer picture of what had been going on. Subaru would be killed by someone, time would rewind, and then his friend would have to find a way to convince them not to do so. Anyone could have killed Subaru and not even remember it. Even… even… Surely Reinhard hadn't right? Subaru was his friend. His dear friend. Subaru wasn't a threat to anyone! Surely he… But he couldn't be certain.
But wait? If not Subaru's attackers, then who did rewind time? And why would Subaru be the only one that remembers? Unless…
Unless…
Reinhard had a thought, and time froze around him.
A dark fog rolled around him. Multiple Divine Protections screamed at him to be on guard. He tried to move but instead found himself stuck in place. Shadow-like hands, feminine and ghastly, reached out towards him. Instinctively, he knew if they reached him, he would be dead. An odd sensation because he had never been in such peril before. The hands targeted him, only to be halted a few inches from his face. A new Divine Protection had been granted to him by Od Lagna, one which's name felt forbidden within his own mind.
D̴̡̢͕͈̘͕͇̼̔͊͆̐̓̀ĩ̶̧̨̪̖͈͛̄͘v̸̟̏̈́̽̕͝ì̸͕͌n̶̰̼̦̩͇̪̓̆͛̇́̿ẻ̴̛̞͎͕̲̣͐͂̃͛̊̎͜ ̵̤͉̊̐̿͘͘͝P̴̥̰̌͜r̴̮̠͈͎͔͙̀̉̏̓͂͒̕͝ǫ̸̭̲̮̻͆͂̋͊͝ẗ̸̙̺́̑͛̄ę̶̛̦͎̗̺̿͗̇̅ͅc̶̫͍͇̺̐̈́̾͐̂̍t̵̯͖̜̖̝͇͈̀̄̔͛̑i̴̜̰͉̽͒̈̃̈̈́͝͝ö̴̼́̀̅̌n̴̨̙̣͑͊̅̏͝ ̴͓̈̎̄̓͠ơ̵̪̬̙̒̇̍ḟ̸̟͓̝̺̈́ ̵̩̠̙̽̈́͘ͅẄ̸̧̛͙̩̩̣͎́̓͗̈̈̉͘ì̷̧̧̲̥̲͎̈́͐̋͘̚͜͝t̷̛̲͑̈́͛͋͘c̸̪̮̄̀̆͛̑̾͠͠h̵̡̟͈̼̙̣̺̒͗̓͝ͅ ̵̨̲̺͚̖̔Ã̶͍̠̖͈͉̤̓v̷̢̤̯̟͎̜̈́̾͛͐ǫ̶̼̜̠͑͆̿̋̚͝į̸̨̥̩͍̾̆ͅͅḑ̷̢͍͔̫̺̬̇̊̑̀̐̔͐̚ͅǎ̵̪̫̞͜n̴̳͔̜̞͐ć̸͇͗̈́̏͘ĕ̶̬̖͓̌̈.
Time remained frozen, but his body was able to move again. The hands continued to reach for him but were unable to touch him. He reached for his sword. Just like he had instinctively known if the hands touched him, he would die, he knew that the Dragon Sword Reid would allow itself to be drawn against this particular opponent.
He did not get the chance, as the moment his fingers touched the hilt, the hands retreated and the fog lifted. Time flowed once more.
What was that? Reinhard had a feeling he knew. He looked down to check on his friend, only to see his friend's eyes staring back at him in bewilderment.
Subaru recognized The Witch's overwhelming presence immediately. Why was she- Had-had someone heard him? No,no, not again. Someone was going to have to die again, and it's all his fault.
He untucked his head to see which poor soul it was.
His eyes were drawn to bright red. He blinked. No, he wasn't wrong. It was Reinhard. Heh… He wasn't sure what would happen now. He had seen Reinhard's monsterous strength first hand, but this was The Witch, it was possible even Reinhard wasn't strong enough to withstand her. Subaru had damned Reinhard, and likely all of Lugnica with him. There would be chaos, and Subaru would likely be forced to Return By Death.
Except none of that happened. The Witch reached for Reinhard, but couldn't grasp him, and then, Reinhard was moving, reaching for his blade, and The Witch retreated. Retreated.
Was Reinhard truly that powerful?
It didn't matter, Subaru was just glad he hadn't gotten his friend killed in his useless rambling.
Then he realized. If The Witch had come to kill Reinhard, that must mean… Reinhard knew. He… Subaru's most horrible secret, revealed to one of the best and the worst people to find out.
"I…" Subaru needed to say something, but he had no clue. Did he need to give an explanation? Damage control? Reinhard was a good person, someone Subaru considered a good friend. He didn't want that to change. Reinhard… Reinhard was one of the few friends Subaru had that had never let him down, never been a threat. He was scared. What if his secret changed that? "I…"
Subaru wasn't able to think fast enough. Before he could finish, Reinhard pulled him into a tight embrace.
Relief. Thank goodness. Overwehelmed by emotion, tears flooded Subaru's vision. Reinhard knew. Reinhard knew and wasn't angry with him. An untold weight lifted from Subaru's shoulders. He wasn't alone in this anymore.
Reinhard pulled away, his gazed lowered. Oh no, Subaru knew that expression, that expression could only mean one thing-
"I'm sorry."
-His idiot friend was giving himself the blame for everything. Something Subaru had realized was a regular occurrence for Reinhard. His friend might just have more self-esteem issues than Subaru did. However, Subaru couldn't see the logic in this one.
"What? Why?"
Reinhard winced, "You died, and I was unable to save you. Furthermore, I was unable to see that you were suffering. Clearly, I have been an awful friend, unworthy of-"
"Stop it!" Subaru interrupted him, feeling genuinely annoyed. It was good, it meant he had stopped crying, or worrying, or thinking about things he shouldn't. "Reinhard, we talked about this."
As he scolded his friend, he childishly waved a finger in his face, "You're a great friend and we're all lucky to have you."
"But," Reinhard tried to protest.
"No buts!" Subaru pressed. Reinhard relented, and Subaru lowered his finger, then his gaze. "Besides, it's not your fault. For any of it. It was my own weakness that got me killed every time."
Reinhard's eyebrows furrowed, "Still, I-"
"The first few times, we hadn't even met. All times after we met, you would have been too far away, otherwise I would have come to you to bail me out."
"Is that so?" Reinhard said, frowning.
"It really is!" Subaru smiled, "I'm not afraid to admit that I'm a coward like that. Dying sucks!"
Reinhard winced, "Subaru, that's…"
"And you can't blame yourself for not noticing. I was kinda trying to hide it. You saw what happens when people find out about it. I thought, no, I knew, she would kill anyone who found out, so I couldn't risk it."
Reinhard remained silent. His eyebrows furrowed as he looked deep in thought. Subaru was hoping his words were getting to his friend. He would feel all kinds of awful if Reinhard blamed himself for Subaru's failures.
He felt a hand on his shoulder. He looked up. Reinhard was looking him in the eye with a serious expression.
"Reinhard?"
"Please tell me everything that has happened. I promise you, now that I am aware, I will do better to prevent further tragedy from befalling you again."
"Huh?" Subaru wasn't sure why he was confused, that was a very Reinhard thing to say, his friend was far too nice. Maybe it was simply that he wasn't prepared to answer such a question. Where would he begin?
"Subaru, you mentioned being murdered. Please tell me the names of the culprits so that I can protect you from them."
"Eh?!" Ok, so, how was he going to explain to Reinhard that he was now friends with people that had murdered him?
Reinhard's expression became pained, "Unless… I too, am one of them, in that case I would understand if-"
"Wait! Stop right there!" Subaru couldn't let Reinhard follow through on that line of thought. "No, nope. You've never killed me or even attacked me in any of the loops. You've always been a consistently reliable character. So don't you dare think that!"
Reinhard sighed in relief.
"Also, you don't need to worry! For the most part, they're all either dead, or don't want to kill me anymore, so you don't need to step in."
"Subaru…" His name was said sternly, like how a parent warns their child to confess now or risk getting in further trouble. But Subaru wasn't scared of Reinhard… Really, he wasn't.
"Seriously, everything is fine!"
"Forgive me, but clearly it isn't, or I wouldn't have found you shaking in an alley just now." Reinhard's expression was pained, "Please, tell me. It would ease my conscience if I know so I could be of help."
And damn it, Subaru was hoping Reinhard wouldn't say something like that. Because he knew it would. He knew Reinhard well enough to know he wasn't just going to drop this. It would eat at him until he knew everyone he cared about was safe.
As Reinhard had thought earlier, Reinhard was the best and worst person to find out about this. Anyone else, Subaru would have been able to find a way to brush off their worries, but Reinhard was far too genuine and serious for that.
"Please, tell me. It would ease my conscience if I know so I could be of help."
Reinhard was still adjusting to what he had learned. Subaru was trying his best to ease his conscience, but Reinhard just knew he should have done better.
His friend had died. Many times. And had only been saved by this strange curse-like ability. His friend had been suffering alone, unable to speak of these awful events, made to act as if nothing had happened.
And it had started before Reinhard had even met Subaru. And continued. Subaru said that Reinhard hadn't been close enough, but that was another way of saying that Reinhard hadn't been there for his friend.
He needed to change that. He couldn't allow this to continue. He knew that he couldn't punish the culprits for crimes they hadn't committed, but knowing was the first step. Reinhard could investigate each one, and step in if any continued to be a threat to his friend. He could stand by Subaru with clear eyes.
Subaru sighed, looking tired, "Fine, but you won't like it."
Reinhard closed his eyes, "I understand, but that is the burden I wish to take. Please do not spare any details just because you think they would bother me."
Subaru opened his mouth and then closed it. An idea come to Reinhard's mind. What if Subaru felt uncomfortable speaking of these events? Was Reinhard's question for Subaru or Reinhard's sake. If his question was causing his friend pain, he would put an end to it. He opened his mouth to take it back.
Subaru too a deep breath and spoke quickly, as if to get it over and done with, "Well, in order; Elsa, Elsa, those street thugs you saved me from, a curse, Rem, Ram, Puck, Puck, Puck again, kinda Felix and Julius, but I was possessed by Sloth at the time and they weren't killing me, Elsa, Elsa once more, the Great Rabbit, and then the Great Rabbit a second time."
Subaru sounded pained listing the names, but Reinhard was too distracted by the sheer number to feel guilty for asking.
Fourteen. Forteen names, but he had a feeling that Subaru was still not mentioning everything. That was fine, Subaru shouldn't have to tell Reinhard everything if he felt uncomfortable.
So Elsa had managed to kill Subaru twice after Reinhard had failed to capture. He grit his teeth at the cost of his failure. The street thugs, Reinhard was unsure how to feel about that, on one hand, he had been unable to save Subaru the first time, on the other hand, he was glad that he was truly able to have been of help that day.
Rem, Ram, and Puck. Those names were concerning. If the reports were correct, Rem was a girl that had been erased by glutony, so Subaru was safe from her for now at least. Ram and Puck however were members of the Emilia camp, and were supposedly in close contact with Subaru. Reinhard couldn't help but feel uneasy with the situation.
The matter of Julius and Felix was… complicated for Reinhard to process his feelings on. Reinhard would like to consider them his friends too. Then again, by Subaru's own admission, it wasn't their fault, but the Sin Arch-bishop of Sloth's, so Reinhard could drop it as a matter of extrenuating circumstances.
The Great Rabbit… Twice… Reinhard had heard the stories of their most gruesome attacks. That must have been extremely painful. Reinhard's stomach twisted, as he double checked his Divine Protection of Mental Instability Detection. How strong was Subaru to still be sane after all that?
He continued to have Reinhard's upmost respect.
"To die so many times, even after we had met, I-"
"Nope," Subaru refused to let Reinhard finished, "you're aren't apologizing for this on my watch. You've always done your best Reinhard. I don't think I've ever died on your watch."
Subaru smiled at Reinhard, and Reinhard smiled back. Subaru had given him an excellent idea.
"Then I will make sure to keep you within my sight from this point on."
Subaru laughed, and Reinhard felt content with the response. Subaru had been so troubled, Reinhard was glad he had lifted his friend's spirits.
"Come, we can discuss this further back at the Astrea Estate." Reinhard, for once, felt quite proud of his plan. Almost giddy. Truly, this was the best course of action for everyone. He could keep Subaru safe, Felt-sama would be happy to have Subaru around, and he too, would enjoy his friend's company.
The only issue was the matter of Subaru being Emilia-sama's knight. But Reinhard knew he could find a way to convince her to let Subaru stay with them. Reinhard had the Divine Protection of Training Mastery, so for the time being, he could have Subaru stay under that guise. There would be very few people unwilling to let their knight's train under him for that reason.
"Wait, you're serious? Reinhard? Reinhard?!"
Authors Note: I am aware that Divine Protections cannot beat Authorities, but that isn't what happened here. I will have to remain vague though, if in case I want to continue to write oneshots for this series.