A/N: I don't own this. We all know who does.

Miracles are real, they never cease, don't let anyone tell you different. This story is proof. :)

My most sincere heartfelt thanks to drivingedward for beta'ing this and Momma Laura for prereading. It's nice to have friends to help me with my many shortcomings. I told them not to go too crazy with perfection because I'm just happy to have this finished, so any errors, extra commas, or run-on sentences are all mine.

Last time on After Jane Died – Bella had tracked down Edward (who had been avoiding her after the camping trip) and thrown a fit in the restaurant (while dressed to kill) after finding him with a realtor (looking at house and office options in Port Angeles). She tripped as she stormed out (because of course she did), Edward swooped in to save her (because of course he did), and she left while he was back in the restaurant getting his things (because of course she did). We pick up there...

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Chapter Fifty-Six

Friday Pt. 4

At the first stop light I took a moment to text Edward, telling him I was embarrassed about what had happened, but I needed some time to think. I didn't want to appear weak in his eyes, and I knew that's what my behavior had looked like to him and every other person in the restaurant. I added that I wouldn't stay away long, and to please not give up on me. Then I turned off my phone, not wanting the distraction if Edward tried to call, because I knew he probably would. And I would be tempted to answer if he did. It was twilight and I knew there were sometimes animals on the road. I didn't need to be distracted any more than I already was. I wiped at the few tears that were trickling down my cheeks, then pulled ahead when the light turned green and traffic began to flow. Soon enough I was out of Port Angeles, on my way home, surrounded by only the quickly darkening forest and very few other cars. Somewhere in the distance I thought I heard a wolf howling and for just a minute I wondered if maybe Alec had heard the same thing the last time he drove through the forest.

The trip seemed faster than the one I'd made earlier in the day. I turned off the radio as soon as the second love song began to play. Driving in silence, I tried to decide exactly what I would say to Edward when we talked. I knew I would need to apologize for leaving the restaurant, but I hoped that would segue into me explaining my feelings about the past week. I wanted him to realize how I felt when he avoided me, and to understand just how hurt I was. I honestly thought we'd moved past that and dealt with his need to pull in on himself when he was upset, and it hurt that we clearly hadn't.

I was also embarrassed about what had happened in the restaurant. I didn't want to be "that girl" in his eyes. The jealous, angry, overly sensitive girlfriend who caused a scene when she didn't get her way. I was ashamed of how I'd acted and I couldn't face him yet. Twisting my ankle and having him carry me out of the restaurant only added to my humiliation. He was right when he said I needed him. I did, but I needed him in so many more ways than just to save me from my own clumsiness.

After pulling into my garage and turning off the car, I sat alone in the darkness for a few minutes trying to decide on my next move. I hadn't really come up with much of anything to say on the drive, and my head was still so jumbled up that I couldn't stop myself from slamming the palm of my hand onto the steering wheel a few times while I let out a long growl of frustration. After a couple of deep breaths, I grabbed my phone, my purse, and my bag from the back seat and headed into the house. I didn't want the lights on, so I walked through the darkness, dropping my phone and bags on the kitchen counter as I walked to the living room. I was still wearing the stupid high heels, so it was more of a skipping hobble than a walk, but eventually I made it, sinking down into the sofa and placing my sore foot on the coffee table in front of me. I reached over and turned on a small lamp that sat on the end table, then leaned my head back on the sofa and closed my eyes.

Try as I may to think about Edward and all the things I needed to say to him, my thoughts kept drifting back to Alec, and when I opened my eyes and glanced around the room, I could see him everywhere. Memories started flooding my brain and I couldn't stop the tears from falling. The most vivid was of our first night in the house.

We had been sitting on the floor all evening, our furniture locked in a moving truck on the other side of town. The delivery dates had been mixed up, and after being on the phone half the afternoon I had finally accepted the fact that we would be sleeping on the floor in sleeping bags on our first night in our new home. Alec said it was like camping, only without the chance of getting rained on, and in Washington there was never a camping trip without at least a little rain.

"Bella, come here," he called from the living room floor where he'd rolled out the two sleeping bags right next to each other.

"What?" I carried in a bag of corn chips and a couple bottles of soda since it was all we had in the kitchen.

"If you lay right here you can see the stars."

"That's because we don't have any curtains yet, you doof," I said with a laugh, smiling at him laying directly under the window.

"Does that mean we can't run around naked in the house?" he asked with a wink.

"Not unless you wanna scar our neighbors for life. We haven't even met them yet. We might wanna hold off on that for a little while." I laughed, kneeling down on my sleeping bag and setting the chips and drinks between us. When I finally laid down I looked up toward the sky, seeing a few stars twinkling up above us.

"We're gonna be so happy here," Alec said, reaching over and taking my hand in his. "This is the perfect house for our family."

I turned my head, looking over at him as he continued to stare up through the window. He was right, we would be happy here. I could feel it.

"Here, I brought this for your foot," Edward said from behind me. "I knew you wouldn't grab it yourself."

I wiped at the tears on my cheeks before turning my head to look at him, seeing a bag of frozen peas in his hand. "I didn't hear you come in."

"I let myself in. Used my key," he said quietly. "I figured you'd be here and if you weren't I was gonna sit and wait. Thought you'd probably show up eventually. I don't know if you want to see me, but I figured I'd take my chances." He walked around the sofa, placing two beer bottles on the table before sitting down and reaching for my foot. I watched as he gently undid the strap and pulled the shoe off, then laid the bag across my ankle. The cold instantly felt good and I was grateful he'd thought of it. "Why'd you come to the restaurant tonight if you weren't planning on staying to talk to me?" he asked.

"I didn't think that out very well," I shamefully admitted. "I've kinda been a mess this week. I'm sorry I ruined your meeting and made you leave early. And I'm really sorry I left. I just didn't know what else to do."

He let out a sigh, than stayed quiet for a few moments. "That's my fault. I'm so sorry about this week. I didn't mean to hurt you, Bella. I really thought I was doing the right thing by staying away and giving you some time."

"How could you think that?" I asked, looking over at him. "Do you have any idea how it made me feel when you just ignored me Sunday? And then I stood at your truck crying and you didn't even try to do anything. How could you do that? How could you make me feel so low? Like you didn't even want me anymore?" Tears streamed down my cheeks as I continued to watch him, waiting for him to look at me. His eyes closed as he leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees and his head in his hands.

"You have no idea how hard that was for me. To walk away from you, knowing how upset you were." He shook his head, his fingers tightening in his hair. "That was one of the hardest things I've ever had to do. This past week has been -"

"You keep saying that, but you didn't do anything," I said, interrupting whatever he was trying to say. I didn't want to hear excuses from him, or how hard it was for him. I wanted to know why he'd pulled away from me like he had. "I'm the one left completely in the dark, here. I'm the one thinking you changed your mind about us. You made me feel like I was just a one night stand, or something."

At that his head snapped my way, his eyes wide and burning into mine. "No. You're not that, Bella. That night meant everything to me."

"So then what the fuck, Edward?!" I yelled. "Was I really that bad? I mean, shit. We'd done everything but sex, so it couldn't have come as some great shock if I suck in bed. Just tell me that! Don't make me feel like a two-bit whore you used to get your rocks off."

"Bell..." he said, shaking his head back and forth. "Don't ever think that. You're so much more to me than you could possibly know. Don't ever, ever think that."

I let out a sad laugh as I continued to cry. "You keep saying over and over again how much I mean to you. That I'll never understand how important I am to you. Then you go and do this to me and you wonder why I feel the way I do? Just tell me what happened. What did I do that freaked you out so badly you blew me off for a week? What could I have possibly done?!" I yelled, throwing my hands up in the air as I tried to make him understand just how confused I was by his actions.

He was quiet for several seconds, watching me with eyes so sad it nearly broke my heart.

"Do you know you talk in your sleep?" he asked quietly. It completely caught me off guard.

"What? What does that have to do with anything?"

He sat back against the sofa, letting his hands fall onto his thighs as he turned his head and stared at them. "I didn't expect you to tell me you loved me. I didn't think you were there yet, so it was okay when you didn't say it back. But then you started crying and I couldn't console you. You just kept crying and crying. It was like the tighter I held you, the harder you cried. And when you finally fell asleep I was grateful, even though you kept crying." His voice grew softer the more he spoke, and when he paused, he sighed, and I watched him as he watched his fingers bend and pick at each other. "Then you started mumbling and pulling away from me and I couldn't figure it out at first, but then I heard you. I thought losing Jane and our marriage was hard, but that night you nearly killed me."

I racked my brain trying to figure out what he was talking about, but I couldn't think of anything. "Edward, I don't know... What did I say? I don't remember anything."

He sniffled, his tongue slipping out to run across his bottom lip before he let out a long breath. "You were calling out to Alec, asking him to stay with you, telling him not to go."

As he spoke I tried harder to remember that night - that perfect, amazing night we'd shared together. It had been almost a week ago, and while it was still so fresh in my mind, the main thing I remembered was how intense things had been between us, and the guilt I'd felt afterward. I knew Alec was gone and that he would want me to be happy, but in that moment of letting him go, I couldn't help but miss him. Other than me not telling Edward that I loved him in return, I didn't understand how my feelings of guilt had caused Edward to pull away from me. Especially after he told me it was okay I hadn't said it back.

"This doesn't make sense. So I dreamed about Alec. So what?" I asked, still confused by what he was saying.

"You said you loved him, and only him," he said in almost a whisper. "You said you wanted to go with him. That it would always be him."

In the quiet moments after he spoke, my dream came crashing back to me. It played at hyper-speed in my mind, so fast that I couldn't understand it – I couldn't decipher it – but I could hear the words repeated over and over again. I heard myself calling out to Alec. I heard myself asking him not to go. I heard myself saying I wanted to stay with Edward. I heard myself saying I loved Edward, I would always love Edward. And then it came to a staggeringly slow crawl, and as each word was spoken, I knew what Edward had heard and why he was so upset.

"Edward," I whispered, reaching over to place my hand on his cheek, turning him to look at me. I needed him to see me, to see me when I said the things I needed him to hear. When his sad eyes finally met mine, I continued. "I wasn't talking about Alec. I was talking about you."

Uncertainty flashed in his eyes and I could see he didn't understand what I was saying.

"I remember it now. I was standing with you, your arms around me, and Alec was there. He called out to me and said I could go with him if I wanted to. I didn't want to," I said, shaking my head as I said the words. "I wanted to stay with you, because I love you. I'll always love you. I must have whispered the things I said, but what you heard wasn't what I dreamed."

"Bella," he mumbled.

"He told me it was okay for me to stay, that you loved me and it was okay. He was okay. That's what I dreamed. It wasn't me wanting to go with him, it was me wanting to go with you." I looked in his eyes, hoping he could see the truth I was telling him. "I'm sorry I cried that night. I am in the same place you are, I swear it. You didn't push me into anything. You didn't force me to do something I wasn't ready for."

"But Bella, you were weeping. I've never seen you cry like that."

A sad smile turned up my lips. "I don't know if I have ever cried like that, not even when Alec died. But in that moment, after everything between us was so perfect, it all hit me full force. Alec's not coming back. I miss him. You know I do, and I always will. But Edward, I can't be without you. I don't know if it was guilt or sadness or what, but that night after we were together, I knew that part of my life was really and truly over. It caught me off guard, I guess. I don't know, maybe I was ignoring it or something, pushing it out of my mind? I don't know, but that doesn't mean I wasn't ready to be with you – that I'm not ready to be with you. Because I am. You and only you, for always. Please, believe me. I'm sorry I didn't say it that night, and I hope it's not too late." My thumb rubbed across his cheek as his eyes searched mine. My shoulders fell, relaxing as I let out a slow breath and watched him. "I love you, Edward. I don't even know when it started, because I can't remember not feeling it. But I do. With all of me. Every single part. Please believe me."

The shaky breath he drew in as his eyes slid closed worried me for a few moments.

"Please believe me. I love you," I whispered again.

His eyes opened and the fire I saw burning in them was like nothing I'd ever seen. He lifted his hands from his lap, moving them to my cheeks as he cradled my face in them. He pulled in several deep breaths as he inched closer to me, keeping his eyes focused totally on mine.

"I do believe you. I love you, Bella," he said softly before leaning his forehead against mine. "I'm never letting you go now. I can't be without you, either. I'm sorry I'm such an ass. You have no idea how sorry I am. If only I'd talked to you. I could have saved us both so much pain this past week." His eyes closed as a grimace spread across his face.

"Talk to me. That's all you have to do. I'll never lie to you, I promise. I love you," I said, then leaned forward ever so slightly until my lips were brushing against his. The kiss started slowly, hesitantly, but when I kissed him again twice, then a third time, he finally moved and began to kiss me back. It was magical, the way our lips moved together, so soft and slow and perfect. I couldn't have held back the quiet whimpers and moans coming from me if I'd wanted to, but I didn't want to. When his lips opened, urging me to follow his lead, I couldn't help but press my tongue forward, licking at him and wanting to feel him doing the same.

I felt like a horny teenager making out in my parents basement as we kissed and kissed, our lips never leaving each other. His fingers threaded through my hair, wrapping around the nape of my neck and pulling me toward him. My fingers pushed back into his hair, twisting the hairs at the back of his head as I urged him closer. When his lips kissed down to my neck, sucking lightly at the skin there and softly brushing my flesh with his teeth, I nearly lost my mind.

I didn't know how much time passed, but it felt far too soon when Edward began to pull away, breathing heavily as he tried to slow things down between us.

"Don't stop," I whispered, leaning toward him in an effort to kiss him again.

"I'm not, don't worry. It's just we need to talk for a minute," he said, swallowing deeply as he pulled in a few long breaths.

"What? I think we talked enough," I said, trying to pull him back to me.

A laugh bubbled from his chest. "Oh, my Bella," he said with a smile.

I smiled, too. "I like the sound of that," I said. "Now no more talking. Kiss me."

"Bella," he said, pulling away even more before taking my hands into his and watching me carefully. "I want to marry you," he said in a soft, but steady voice. "I want to marry you and take you away from here. I don't ever want anyone to think we're not right together. I want to be yours, and for you to be mine, and no one to ever think otherwise."

"Edward..."

His lop-sided grin that I loved so much graced his face as he looked down at our hands, then looked back up to meet my eyes again. "I'm not asking right now, but I will be asking. Soon. You need to know that. And when you say yes I'm taking you away from here, you and the kids, and we'll be together for the rest of our lives."

I nodded as I felt my eyes well up with tears. "I want that. I want that with you."

He smiled again, pulling my hand to rest on his waist before lifting his to cup my cheek. "You're my Bella. It doesn't make any sense for you to love me, but you do, and I'll never doubt that again."

"Never," I mumbled in a whisper.

When his lips met mine again, I opened to him, letting my tongue meet his, twisting and taking his into my mouth. I wanted him in me, in every way possible. Wrapping my hands around his waist and then tracing them up his back, I pulled him toward me as I leaned back on the couch. He didn't hesitate, pushing me back until he was lying on top of me, his hands touching every part of me that they could reach. As we kissed and held one another, gently urging each other on, his lips once again slipped down to my neck, kissing and sucking as he went.

"Edward?" I moaned.

"Hmmm?"

I paused for a moment, trying to clear my hazy mind enough to remember what I wanted. When he leaned up, looking to my eyes with questions and lust all over his face, I remembered.

"Make love to me."

"Here?" he asked.

"Here," I said, pulling his lips back to mine.

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A/N: This story is fully written – there are 60 chapters, 3 EPOV outtakes, and a Futuretake/Epilogue. I'll post every Tuesday and Friday for the next 4 weeks until the last post on Tuesday, March 1st. I'll gut all the chapter A/N's after I mark this complete so that it's an easier read from start to finish.

There will be a teaser the day before each new chapter/outtake posted in my FB group – beegurl13's Fanfiction Beehive. There are also pictures and other stuff from the story there if you want to see it.

Thank you for not giving up on me or on these two.

Reviews get a teaser, different from the one I'll post on FB. :)