Nick awoke early that morning to find that the holiday season had finally arrived. Mammals all across Zootopia would be gathered inside for the cold winter months to celebrate all kinds of holidays with their families. It was considered by some to be the most wonderful time of the year, though at many times, Nick hesitated to agree. The red fox always tried to keep his chin up, but he knew the often harsh reality of the world too well. As much as he tried to get into the spirit, Nick never could bring himself to utter a "happy holidays." In his days of hustling, Nick spent so many Christmases alone. Occasionally however, he was invited to join some of his former associates with their families during the holidays they shared. He'd had a taste of it all, really—the Christmases and the Kwanzaas, the Hanukkahs and the New Year's Day celebrations to close them off. But when the vulpine didn't outright turn the invitations down, Nick always felt like a ghost among these families. He knew deep down he didn't belong, and he knew that there was something there that he was missing. To say that Nick desired to feel this holiday cheer again would be the understatement of the century.
The red fox dug through his small walk-in closet one day and rummaged through various boxes full of his miscellaneous belongings without any real goal. There, he found a very special photograph tucked away. A photo of himself, seated on the floor of his childhood home next to a halfway decorated fake tree while an old Christmas movie played on his tiny box television.. He was dressed in a brown striped sweater and had a big smile on his face. On his head, there was a bright red stocking cap, the edge lined with white fluff and a matching puffy tassel on the end. The photo's date was marked in blue ink in the corner: 12/19/91. Nick couldn't have been more than seven, going on eight years old at the time this photo was taken. The tod couldn't hold back a small laugh as he gazed at the old photograph. With his father out of the picture and no extended family to speak of, he had only his mother to spend this season with as a kit. None of that phased Nick in the moment, but now that he had become his own man, it was hard not to feel hollow this time of year. Ever since he began hustling, Nick had grown more and more distant with his mother, and as such he did not maintain regular communication with her. Nick put the photo back away and began to think as he pulled out his phone. Should he call her? He would hate for her to feel alone like her poor son always was. The vulpine shook it off and left his room, ashamed of who he was before becoming an officer for the Zootopia Police Department. How would his mother be able to sleep at night knowing that her little angel had a criminal record like his?
Nick went into the kitchen and began to brew himself a morning cup of coffee. Looking through his pantry, he decided on a peppermint creamer to feel like he at least did the bare minimum to get into the holiday season. As he set his mug out, Nick scratched his leg with his hind paw, his mint green pajama pants riding up his calf as he rubbed the remaining bit of sleep out of his eyes. The apartment was so unusually quiet that day, and it began to fill Nick with a sense of unease. The red fox padded back near his room and turned to face the door that was right beside his own. On it, he found a bright yellow sticky note, which he took off the wall and read.
went to hang at judy's place. be back whenever. text or call if you need me home sooner.
~miles
The vulpine furrowed his brow slightly. Miles, Nick's adopted son, was down the hall with Judy for whatever reason. So that was why his home felt so empty. He didn't mind this of course, but it meant Nick didn't have anyone here to confide in. The grey fox was always able to lift his adoptive father's spirits, sometimes with just his presence alone. The boy loved Nick, and so too was that love reciprocated, but Nick respected his son's boundaries and would not force him to come home just so he could feel better about himself. Though thinking about Miles got his mind to wander. Nick had adopted Miles not all that long ago, and the teenager had no one for all fourteen years of his life before now. He was all alone just like Nick, one of the reasons why the red fox decided he wanted to become Miles' father. He had to ask himself, what were the holidays like for Miles back when he was still an orphan?
Meanwhile, across the hall…
Miles had been anticipating the coming of the holidays for weeks, and he had many reasons to be excited. This would be the first winter season that the grey fox would not be spending as an orphan. He was visiting with Judy today, and the two were joined by none other than Benjamin Clawhauser. Miles had since developed a sort of friend-of-a-friend dynamic with Ben, though the two often interacted in ways almost befitting an uncle and nephew. Miles never got the chance to have any holidays at Greypaw's Home for Cubs, the foster home or "orphanage" he once lived at. Most of his time was spent plotting his escape from the city of Zootopia, and even then, he and the other children there didn't exactly have anyone with whom they could spend the season. The matrons had always given the other orphans a hopeful message that they too would get to experience this feeling that so many held dear when they had what was often the central focus of these holidays: a family of their own. The foster home was never decorated like many other public buildings, and why Miles and the other children were always left out this time of year was a mystery to him. But this year was different. Miles had experienced an "adventure" as it came to be known and had met Nick, his first real friend and the man who would eventually become his father. Miles watched Judy and Ben share their plans for the future, simply enjoying being in their company.
"I'll probably be in Bunnyburrow with my family," he listened in on Judy's plans for her holiday celebration which she shared with Ben, "I bet you can imagine how chaotic bunny Christmases are."
"You want to talk about chaos?" Clawhauser chimed in, "I'm meeting Bogo's family for the first time, and I am SUPER nervous. We'll do Christmas at my place and then Kwanzaa with his family. I haven't seen the chief this excited for anything, even if it's layered under that tough guy attitude."
Judy furrowed her brow as she sat back down on her couch. "He still makes you call him chief, even though you guys are dating?"
"Naw, I guess it's just a habit. He's not that strict."
Miles typically enjoyed listening to other people talk rather than doing any talking himself. He had been sitting quietly as the two older mammals idly chattered with a mug of chamomile tea close by, something he as a mammal with chronic anxiety grew somewhat addicted to. Judy turned to him after he had slightly zoned out and introduced him to their conversation.
"What about you, Miles?" she asked in a gentle voice, "Do you have any holiday plans?"
The young fox swallowed and puckered his lips together. Though he still had trouble opening up to people, Miles had learned that honesty and trust were key parts of forming strong, long-lasting relationships. The truth hurt a little, but he felt that Judy and Ben could be trusted, and for someone to gain Miles' trust was a rare thing indeed.
"I've never had a Christmas or a Kwanzaa or whatever else before," he admitted. "I grew up in a foster home, remember?"
A sudden short gasp came from Clawhauser. "Oh my god," he remarked, "Annie was right! Santa Claus you never see, Santa Claus what's that, who's he?"
The moment Miles had become acquainted with Ben, he was faced with a barrage of jokes all comparing him to the likes of orphans in the media, anything from Annie to Oliver Twist. He glared in slight annoyance at the large cheetah, fed up with his tomfoolish behavior.
"I swear to God, Ben. You make another Annie reference, and I'ma inhale a handful of Night Howlers and go feral on your ass."
"I'm like twice your size, little dude," Clawhauser quickly retorted, "You'd be tickling me ad best!"
"Yeah, well," Miles stuttered as he tried to think of a witty comeback, "Well, I got adopted! You're now legally banned from making orphan jokes about me."
"I've worked reception at the ZPD for seven years. There's no law prohibiting orphan jokes!"
"I'll get the adoption papers if I have to! Legally. Banned."
Clawhauser scoffed and rolled his eyes. He looked over at Judy, who had been amusedly watching the fox and the cheetah's playful bickering.
"What's your verdict, Judy?" Ben declared, "We need to have a draw to settle that Miles here is clearly spreading false information!"
The rabbit stroked her chin thoughtfully and paced behind the couch. She was clearly trying to play along with their childish banter, and as such she eventually reached around to put a paw on Miles' shoulder.
"I dunno Ben," Judy gave him a sly look, "I think I have to take Miles' side on this one. He said it himself. He got adopted, and that means he isn't technically an orphan anymore. It seems the evidence is stacked against you."
"Ha!" Miles belted out, "I win!"
All of a sudden, Clawhauser's phone alarm started playing a song from the pop singer Gazelle's newest album. He checked the device and silenced his alarm as he threw on a heavy jacket. The forecast displayed on his lock screen looked to be quite chilly, calling for icy roads and for Savanna Central, quite a lot of snow. Clawhauser shoved his phone in his pocket and made for the door, the feline giving his final words to close the conversation.
"Yeah yeah, I'll give you this round. I gotta go anyway, I have plans tonight. I'll see you guys around!"
That one jab referring to Santa made Miles remember one detail clear as day: he had never celebrated a holiday in his life. He was never told about such a being known as Santa Claus, Saint Nicholas, and surely many other names. This enigmatic figure who supposedly resided in the planet's northern pole and delivered presents to children on Christmas Eve was yet another party who had been absent in Miles' childhood. This mystery mammal had sparked debate in the mind of young Miles. Was his name on this "naughty list" he claimed to carry, or did Santa neglect to bring gifts to orphans such as himself? It was safe to assume that the young vulpine quickly grew out of believing in such tales, regardless of if they were truthful or not. Still, he wanted to know what it was like to be included in the holidays, and now that he had a family, it was the perfect time to seek out that opportunity. Nick had come home a little earlier that evening, finishing what little work he had left before his holiday break. Once Nick was settled, Miles took it upon himself to confront his father on the matter.
Nick was glad to have his winter break finally take effect. Today and the days to come after it were a moment's rest from working all day and coming home exhausted. This holiday break meant he would not only have some time to himself, but also more time to spend with Miles. Nick knew how his son hated being left alone all day, and he never failed to spark guilt in his adoptive father's heart on days he was awake to see Nick off. As he stretched out in his recliner, Nick caught Miles in his peripherals with his two index fingers pressed together. Nick heard his spine pop as he sat up and arched it forward. He turned his focus to the younger tod and prepared for what was on Miles' mind.
"Dad," the boy's voice held a curious inflection, "What's it like celebrating a holiday?"
The red fox was confused. Had his son never experienced a holiday before? He himself had fallen out of the big fuss made this time of year as he previously recalled, since he had no one to truly spend this season with. He and his mother rarely spoke, which Nick had come to regret more and more with each passing year. He didn't quite understand his boy's predicament, but he would attempt to help by gaining more information.
"Whaddya mean, kiddo?" Nick inquired of him.
"Well, it's my first Christmas," Miles answered softly. "When I was at Greypaw, no one ever talked about the holidays. I never even celebrated my birthday when I found out what day it was. Our caretakers always said we'd get to have holidays with our new families if we got adopted…I added the 'if' part, obviously."
Nick began to see a clearer picture now. Miles' icy diamond-like eyes held a gaze befitting a much younger child than him. They were full of innocent wonder, and as Nick looked at his son, he now understood the question he asked almost completely. It was adorable seeing Miles—a boy who had experienced the traumas of being given up for adoption, emotional unavailability from his caregivers, and prejudice that he faced because of who and what he was—in such a state of emotional purity. Nick began to think back to when he too was small and innocent, to simpler times, to his younger days. He remembered the photo he found that morning, and he told Miles all that he wanted to know.
"I can't speak for everyone, Mi, but I'll tell you how I used to do it. I remember those days fondly. My mom would always bring this fake pine tree nearly three times as old as me down from the attic. That thing barely reached the top of the window, and the two of us would decorate it together with little ornaments and stuff. I'd get so excited every time. But, one year, we just stopped. I haven't the slightest idea why, we just didn't get it down one year. We'd still always try to get each other a little something to show that we cared, even if we didn't do like we used to."
Miles seemed captivated by Nick's story. However, he still looked like he had more questions to ask.
"Is she…you know," Miles folded his hands and sounded almost concerned, "You always talk about her like she's not around anymore."
Nick's ears perked up in exclamation, "Oh no! She's alive and well. We just don't really talk much anymore. I began to distance myself from her when I started hustling. Last time we spoke in person was…when I graduated from the academy, I think?"
The younger vulpine continued to look at him with wide eyes as he spoke. Nick still couldn't help but think how cute it was. Though the red fox's ears drooped down as he exhaled a sad breath.
"I don't really have much 'Christmas spirit' anymore. I wish I'd get the courage to go and meet up with her again. It would be nice to feel that joy I had as a kit."
Miles rubbed his thumbs together, one last question building in his mind.
"Seems like you had a lot of fun, doing that with your mom." The young fox shuffled his hind paws on the ground, "Do you think…maybe you'd want to make it a family tradition?"
Nick couldn't help but crack a smile. The teenager was trying to make him feel that joy again. He longed to feel the connections so many had this time of year, despite how he struggled to make them, and who better to connect with than his own adopted son? Nick felt inspired to reconnect with that inner child who still saw the holiday season with such magic. The older fox stood up and ruffled Miles' hair as he gave his answer.
"I think that's a fantastic idea."
Miles' face lit up bright as day. "Really?!" the grey fox wagged his short tail with excitement, "You mean it?"
"Sure thing, pal," Nick smirked as he saw the boy's beaming face. "Tell you what—tomorrow, the two of us can go into town and we'll pick out a nice tree, get some decorations, and we'll make your first Christmas one to remember. Sound like a plan?"
Miles leapt into Nick's chest and hugged him tight, a little laugh coming from him. He was finally going to have a Christmas, he was finally going to feel that holiday cheer, and best of all, he had a family to share it with. Miles was eager to have his father relive those memories he seemed to cherish, and Nick himself was determined to make his son's first holiday ever something very special. He knew what it was like to be without someone who loved him at a time where familial bonds were celebrated, and as such he could indeed imagine the loneliness Miles must have felt. He had been all alone in the world his whole young life, plenty of time to jade his perception of it all. Nick imagined the grey fox's views of the holidays must have once been cynical or pessimistic at best, and downright nihilism or resentment at worst. But that was all about to change. These thoughts would become a thing of the past, and the older tod swore to himself that they would always be just that. He knew Miles would never forget about his life as an orphan or the trauma that spawned from it, but Nick was more than willing to try his best to give Miles what he deserved not just now, but the whole year round: a good life, a loving family, and happy holidays for the both of them to spend together.
Later, at Judy's apartment…
"You sure you can't make Christmas this year, Jude?" This was the question on the mind of Judy's father, Stu, over Muzzletime.
"Have you seen the forecast, Stu?" Her mother, Bonnie, lectured, "The roads are supposed to get slicker than an otter in an oil spill. Maybe you made the right call."
Judy rested her phone against her dresser vanity and ran her fingers along her ears. "They're saying the roads will be closed by tomorrow, and I'm not fixing on totaling my car. Sorry guys, but I'd rather skip out this year than spend it in a hospital bed."
Stu curled his finger and pressed it to his lips. "Now that you mention it, it's probably for the best. Always next year, right?"
The rabbit family said their goodbyes and hung up, their spirits doleful that their daughter would not be joining them for the holidays. It was unfortunate, yet necessary considering that the cold winter air had already frozen many roads. Travelling to or from Zootopia was highly advised against by experts due to the danger icy roads could pose. Judy almost never missed an opportunity to be with her family on the holidays, and as such this came as a sizable dent in her typical seasonal cheer. However, the rabbit woman didn't want to let her disappointment keep her down. Some fresh air would likely be good for her somber mood, she thought. Judy threw on a thick coat lined with dappled faux fur and a knit scarf as she unlocked her apartment. She went out into the hall, proceeded down the flights of stairs and left the building out the front entrance in the lobby. She let out an exhale from the nip of the outdoors, her breath a cloud of mist by way of condensation. Small white crystals danced through the air and piled into sparkling mounds of snow on the ground. Savana Central had never looked more like Tundratown. As she put her paws in her coat pockets, a familiar teal-haired silver fox could be found to her left a few meters away, black-striped tail wagging jovially. Miles tossed a handful of snow into the air and let it fall down on his face, an action that Judy both humored and found quite adorable. The boy was dressed in an all black winter coat with matching mittens dangling from its sleeves, his trademark maroon bandana around his neck poking out of the partially unzipped top layer. His coat also had a lining of faux fur, though in a matching black that made him stick out prominently against the white background.
"So, you've decided to come out and play in the snow?" Judy's voice from behind made Miles jump a little as he swiftly turned to face her.
"I-I wasn't playing," He fibbed, the flakes that freckled his face evidence of the contrary, "I was just looking. We hardly ever get snow here, and I've never been to Tundratown, so it's not like I ever got to see any before…"
Miles' notched ear twitched and launched flurries into the air around him. "Okay, so maybe I was playing in it. But hey, can you really blame me?"
"I suppose not," Judy giggled as she dusted off the teenager's face with her scarf. Miles cringed and gave a little grin as the scarf tickled his muzzle. "But it looks like you're having fun."
The young grey fox felt a bit of sadness from Judy's aura. Though her attitude seemed playful, it looked like some things were going unsaid. He cared for Judy, and even saw her as something of a maternal figure. Miles was ultimately happy to have any kind of family now, yet there were just some ways he connected with Judy that he just could not with Nick. He was doing his best to raise Miles as a single parent, but that did not mean his son could only find a family in his adoptive father. After all, the rabbit was a friend Nick and Miles both shared. The boy folded his paws and locked eyes with her, an expression of concern and curiosity on his face.
"Is somethin' wrong, Judy?" he gingerly proposed the question.
The lagomorph woman sighed and answered, "Well, the roads are supposed to get really slippery, and dangerous to drive on. That means I can't make it to my family's Christmas party this year. I suppose that's got me a little down in the dumps."
Miles' ears folded down, his notched ear twitching again. He knew what it was like to spend the holidays alone, and it hurt to know that he was happy when others he loved couldn't be. His tail swished back and forth as he thought to himself for a minute. Judy was like family to him, and to Nick as well. Maybe this was a good idea he had. The young tod took her hands in his own, hopeful that he would soothe her woes.
"I got an idea," Miles chirped, "Maybe you could come celebrate with me and Nick—er, I mean, my dad? I never got to do this as an orphan, so I wanna have a really good first Christmas now that I have people to be with."
Judy patted his forearm and replied, "That's very thoughtful of you, hun, but if it's your first time, I don't want to interject myself. You should be with your new family, but I appreciate your concern."
"Please, I insist! Since you can't make it with your family, why not? You're basically like a second parent to me anyway."
Miles immediately covered his mouth with his paw. His face turned redder than his bandana as he tugged on it with embarrassment. "Shit, I said that out loud, didn't I?"
Judy pulled the boy into a side hug. Miles only blushed harder at her embrace, shaking not from cold, but from nerves.
"I'm flattered you think that way of me, Miles. I'm sure Nick would be happy to let me join you. I'll talk to him about it tonight."
Miles' ears perked back up and he returned the hug with passion. This really was a good idea. Now, he had not one, but two people he loved to spend his first Christmas with! Miles had taken after his father this one time when it came to making a foolproof plan, though this plan was nowhere near as elaborate as the ones Nick had schemed in the past. The rabbit decided to return to her apartment after the winter air had gotten too much for her, and the grey fox continued to stay outside marveling at the snow until his father called him home. Soon, Nick would celebrate the holidays for the first time in years with two new members to take part: Miles, his adopted son, and Judy, his dearest friend who both of them believed worthy of being an honorary member of the Wilde family. The red fox stared at his phone as he sat on the living room couch, contemplating dialing his mother's phone number. He wanted to hear her voice again, to see the face of the woman who raised him, to feel her loving embrace. He looked now to Miles, who was cuddled up to him wrapped in a blanket, his head resting on Nick's chest and his crystal blue eyes glued to a movie the two had decided looked entertaining. Despite this, Nick still felt cold and alone. Now was a time he had always been told should be spent with his loved ones, and the red fox would feel only guilt if he ghosted his mother for yet another Christmas. Nick petted his son's head as he stood up, the boy's notched ear twitching at the embrace. Miles looked at his father with a puzzled face, being left alone on the couch as Nick made for his room.
"Where'ya going?" Miles asked.
Nick put his phone in his pocket and sighed. "I'm just lost in thought, pup," he answered as he ran his hands across his head anxiously, returning to Miles' side.
"There's something important I have on my mind."
Elsewhere in Zootopia…
The sun hung beneath the horizon when Jasper returned home that snowy afternoon. The hyena was thankful to have beaten the weather, though he would not have minded staying with his family until the roads thawed. Eight days he had been away at his childhood home, where his parents had hosted a Hanukkah celebration. It was nice to see them again, as well as his siblings and their families. But as his holiday came to a close and the candles extinguished and removed from the menorah, the second half of the seasonal celebration began. Jasper looked at the door of his house and found a fir wreath. She had started decorating without him. The hyena man entered his abode and placed a reusable tote bag on his living room sofa, gazing around at the room at the work that had been done. Greens, reds, and golds captured his eyes, but what really took his attention was the large evergreen that sat against the dining room window. It was decorated with various trinkets along with blue and silver baubles, and perched on the top branch was a star formed of two interlocking triangles. Jasper's ears caught the sound of paws against the floor headed his way. The figure who approached him was a beautiful caracal woman clad in a deep red dress trimmed with white. Her name was Rosemary, and she was the light of his life. She threw her wavy blonde hair over one shoulder and gave him a bright smile. Jasper looked into her eyes, the right one a brilliant green while the left was sapphire blue, and smiled back. The caracal wrapped her arms around her hyena boyfriend and pecked a kiss on his cheek.
"Welcome home, Jass," she greeted.
"And you just couldn't wait for me to get back to start decorating, eh Rose?" Jasper taunted in reply.
His girlfriend scoffed at his teasing and shot back, "Well, what did you expect me to do while you were gone, just sit around and twiddle my paws?"
Jasper couldn't say he didn't blame her. He had been away for a little over a week, and he knew how eager Rose got to decorate their house from foundation to shingles. The feline strutted back over near the kitchen and pointed her thumb in its direction.
"But you know, there's still a lot more to be done to ring in the season. I saved my favorite part for when you could be here with me."
The hyena man chuckled and felt himself blush slightly. His lover's treasured hobby was one she wished to spend with him, and Jasper felt honored to take part. Though he considered himself to be a painfully subpar cook, he wouldn't pass on this quality time with Rose. Jasper followed his girlfriend into the kitchen as she began to gather various ingredients for baked desserts and other such sweets. As Rose turned to face Jasper, he knew just what she was about to ask.
"You did remember to bring me back some of those…" the caracal struggled to pronounce the name, "Sufganiyah? Sufganiyot? You know, those little jelly doughnuts?"
Jasper pulled a zip locked bag out from behind his back. "Don't I always, love?"
Rose took out a paper plate and laid the pastries out. She took one in her paw and declared, "If and when I open my own bakery, I'd like to have these out on display."
"You'll have to fight my mother for the recipe," her boyfriend joked as he stuffed one in his mouth.
The two mammals laughed at themselves and made their plans for what they would cook. They would have a fine meal, and afterwards they would indulge in all of the delicacies they planned to make today. But what they would most enjoy indulging in this holiday season was each other's company. Jasper and Rose believed they were complete together, and felt as if not even fate itself could break them apart. Neither could think of a better way to spend this time of year that so many held so special. Later that evening, Jasper stood outside and gazed at the stars, still in awe that it could get so dark so early in the day. He had already been to see his family for the holidays, yet something told him deep down that his family was more than just those with whom he shared blood. He recalled a certain mammal who he had grown a relationship with beyond just patient and therapist. A mammal who had become his friend after the hyena had lended necessary aid to assist a younger mammal, cub who was in need. After what they had dubbed as their "adventure" came to a close, Jasper also recalled that his friend had taken the cub in as his son and spared him from a life of loneliness. The two of them had found a family in each other, a family built from sympathy, understanding, and ultimately, love. All of this made Jasper start to think that maybe, he should begin to do the same. He pulled out from his coat pocket a small, rounded indigo velvet box. He contemplated for a while as he stared at it, rehearsing all the things he wished he could say out loud. Yet the hyena man sighed as he shook his head, returning the box to its place in his pocket.
"Maybe someday," Jasper mused.
At the Zootopia Police Department…
When Benjamin Clawhauser entered the ZPD building, it appeared as though no one was there. However, the golden glow coming from upstairs proved the contrary. Ben dusted off his creamy white tuxedo and straightened his jet black bowtie as he made his way up the stairs. The cheetah had big plans going forward, but this night was one he and his lover were going to have all to themselves. As he approached the chief's office, the clamor of busy work was heard out in the hallway.
"Chief?" Clawhauser called out into the room, "Chief Bogo?"
The clamor came to a hush as the chief's voice shouted back, "Who is that? What business do you have here after hours?"
Ben entered the room and found Chief Bogo sitting with various documents piled on his desk. The feline slipped in the door and gave a small wave. The chief looked at him for only a second or two before returning to his work.
"Just me," Ben muttered. "You look busy."
"If it wasn't immediately obvious," The buffalo retorted, "I'm up to my horns in work ranging from things I couldn't give less of a damn about, to that which I should likely devote more of my time to. That, and I'm being pressured by everyone around me to take a load off for the holidays. Those people fail to realize one thing; these documents won't file themselves."
Chief Bogo turned his attention back to Clawhauser and scanned over his tasteful outfit. "And why, do tell, are you standing in my office dressed like that?"
Ben thought it was obvious, but he explained nonetheless. Though beforehand, he expressed his concern. "You look awfully stressed. What's wrong?"
"Were you not paying attention?" Bogo snapped, "I told you what was wrong."
"Something tells me it's a little more than just work that's eating you, love."
Bogo blushed ever so slightly at being called "love". He quickly shook it off however and unenthusiastically returned to his work. Ben put his elbows on the desk and leaned against it, resting his chin in his paws. The awkward silence hung thickly in the air as the two mammals sat in the office. Only the rustling of papers and the scratching of the pen against them penetrated the noiseless void. Clawhauser checked his watch and cleared his throat, attempting to get his boyfriend's attention.
"You know, I thought we could treat ourselves to a nice dinner tonight. You've been working so hard all day, why not take some time to yourself? I know you said you're fed up with being told to take off, but you're practically working yourself to death here. Can't you just take one night off?"
Chief Bogo let out an exasperated sigh. "Alright," he replied, "Just one night."
Clawhauser perked up and gave a quirky two-fingered salute. "I'll meet you in the car!"
At the restaurant, Ben observed that Bogo was still stressed despite his preparations for tonight. Though he cared for him, Ben was hesitant to ask lest he worsen the chief's mood. His plate of food was barely touched despite the high quality of the meal. There was most definitely something outside of work that was upsetting Bogo. Clawhauser placed a paw on his lover's hoof, hoping to find an answer of some kind and that the cape buffalo would confide in him.
"Is everything okay, dearest?"
Bogo let out a sigh from his nose and became noticeably less tense. Ben felt glad that the chief was able to share his feelings around him.
"It's my family," Bogo admitted, "I'm not sure what they'll think of me. It's the first time I've brought home anyone really, and the thought of what may be has been itching in the back of my mind."
The feline nodded. They weren't just a gay couple, but an interspecies couple as well. Many prey animals still held bigotry against predators like himself, especially those who lived in times where such bigotry was not frowned upon, or even accepted as the norm. That was not to mention that there were mammals even including predators who would discriminate against the two for loving someone of the same gender. Bogo's fears were not without reason, as these biases often tore families apart. Clawhauser took the buffalo's hand and rubbed it, offering his sympathies to his boyfriend.
"I may not know your family yet," he announced, "But if they're the kind of people who would disown you for who you love, then maybe they don't deserve your company. Besides, if it doesn't work out with them, we could always ask some friends if they want to join us for the holidays, or it could just be the two of us of course."
Bogo returned Clawhauser's embrace. "Perhaps you're right, love."
Ben's sentiment calmed Chief Bogo's worries ever so slightly. The two went on to enjoy their lovely dinner together now optimistic about their future. Though many would tell them that they did not deserve their happiness, they would not be phased in the end. If their blood families would not accept them during this time of year, Bogo and Clawhauser felt happy that they would at least find joy in each other.
Back at the Wilde residence…
Nick sat on his living room couch with Miles snuggled up close to his chest, almost half asleep, and Judy seated not far from the two foxes. The three mammals had put on another movie after they had finished decorating the new tree that stood in the space between the living room and dining area. Though he was happy to be with the two people he loved most, his best friend and his son, Nick still had that feeling from before gnawing at his mind. The red fox had clutched his phone all night, debating with himself on whether he should contact another person he loved that he had neglected for so long. He suddenly felt Judy tap his shoulder and he looked her way, meeting her eyes and finding a sympathetic glow in them.
"You feeling okay, Nick?" she asked.
The vulpine shrugged and gave his answer, "I'm just thinking. I used to be so close with my mom, but it's been so long since we last spoke to each other. I'm just wondering if maybe I should, you know, reach out. Everyone always says you're supposed to spend this time of year with those you love, and my mom's no exception."
The rabbit nodded. She processed what he had told her carefully and brought forth another question. "Why are you hesitating? Is there a particular reason you've been putting it off?"
"I'm just a little afraid," Nick admitted, "She never liked it when I hustled as a kid. She'd always say, 'I didn't raise you to be a troublemaker.' God, the look she'd have on her face if she knew what I'd done with my life before the ZPD."
Judy looked at him with compassion as she placed a hand on his shoulder. While she never had much conflict with her family, it was brought back to her mind that she too had faced disapproval from her parents from the path she chose, though admittedly to only a moderate degree. There was good reason to worry for the first rabbit officer, though Judy proved that this life was one that her parents had no need to fret over. In time, they came to accept that she was a more than worthy fit for the job, and embraced it as much as she did.
"My parents were dead set on dissuading me from joining the ZPD," the rabbit woman explained, "But eventually, they saw how capable I was, and they came around to it sooner or later. In the end, I was still their daughter, and they didn't think any less of me because of the path I chose. If your mom really loves you, I'm sure she'll do the same for you. Besides, it's not like you ever did anything completely unforgivable."
Nick took in her words all at once. His mother would love him regardless of who he was. The fox guessed that's just how mothers were. He was foolish to think otherwise, and his worries faded ever so slightly. Nick took his phone in his paw and dialed the number, standing up from the couch and going into his room. Miles' head slipped as he looked in Nick's direction, curious as to why his makeshift pillow had left him. To substitute, he chose to lean against Judy's shoulder while the two awaited his father's return. As the other end of the line began ringing, Nick felt his stomach twist into knots. He closed the door to his room and paced the floor. The line kept ringing and Nick almost thought she was never going to pick up the phone, but suddenly, the ringing stopped.
"Yes?" came a feminine voice from the speaker.
"Mom," Nick responded, "I-It's me, Nick."
"Nick?" his mother's voice was heard again, "It's been so long, dear! How've you been?"
"Getting by I suppose. I just wanted to wish you well this holiday season."
"Well, thank you for thinking of me. But is that really all there is to say? Isn't there more we should catch up on?"
There was indeed. Nick had plenty to talk about. Getting into therapy, his job, adopting Miles—but all of that could come at a later date. Nick wanted to save these for when he could meet her again face to face.
"Trust me, there's a lot to tell," Nick put his thoughts into words, "But I feel like we can share it better if we meet up in person. What say we arrange some time we can get together?"
"I'd say that's a fine idea," Nick's mother agreed, "I'm sure you have some get-together of your own to attend. I'll leave you to that now. I'll see you soon, darling."
Nick bid her farewell and happy holidays as he hung up and took a deep breath. He was glad to have that over with, and excited to meet up with his mother after so many years. "Should I take Miles to see her too?" he thought, "She's part of his new family too, after all." Thinking of Miles, Nick recalled that he did have his own "get-together" of sorts to attend. The vulpine stuffed his phone back in his pocket and returned to his company's side. He felt proud of himself for accomplishing that which he had put off for so long, and eagerly sat back down with Judy.
"How'd it go?" Miles eagerly asked as he left his room dressed in comfy pajamas.
"Surprisingly well, if shorter than expected," Nick answered.
Judy took Nick's paw and clasped it as a sign of solidarity. The two mammals locked eyes, like emeralds and amethysts glittering at each other. Their free hands connected as they turned to face each other. Nick felt his throat tense up as he murmured something to the rabbit beside him.
"Thanks for the support, Fluff. I needed that."
"What else are friends for?" Judy smirked.
"Oh my god, I completely understand now why Ben ships you guys!" Miles suddenly appeared on the back of the couch, eavesdropping on their sentimental moment.
"You, young man," Nick pinched Miles' nose in a teasing way, "Need to keep this nose of yours out of other people's business, and to learn the meaning of platonic love."
Miles crawled over the couch and retook his position in between the rabbit and the older fox. Nick wrapped his arm around to reach Judy as Miles cuddled back up to his father's chest. This was Nick's family. Not bound by blood, but by a strong friendship, by adoption, by choice. Though he still had his mother, who he loved equally as them, Nick had found his true family through bonds that ran thicker than blood. This family was just as strong as any blood family, and perhaps even stronger. Its members had found each other by way of kindness and understanding, and it was made out of a desire to see each other grow and prosper. Nick caressed Judy's shoulder with one paw and stroked Miles' hair with the other. In his humble opinion, there was no better family out there that he could share a happy holiday with.
A Message: Hey all. I want to take a moment to recognize something I think far too often goes unsaid. This holiday season, and any holidays really, are sometimes not the joyous occasion that most people or the media may portray them as. Unfortunately, I'm not just talking about your standard seasonal depression, as unfun as that may be. For some of us, this time of year is when we're most miserable. We feel like strangers in our own homes, like ghosts among our families, and we cannot connect with that seasonal cheer we're told to feel. Often, it's these people who contribute to the pain we feel during this time, and just being in their presence can make us down, because we don't belong with them. When we reach out about how terrible we feel, we're told we're spoiling the moment, that we're a grinch or a scrooge, because we have the audacity to feel depressed. We often ask ourselves, how can we feel like we belong? I'd like to offer my thoughts on the matter. The first step is to remember we aren't alone. If your family is one that serves as a reminder every year without fail that this isn't where you belong, I ask that you take one thing from this short collection of stories: your family does not have to be the one you were born into. I didn't mean for this to get so serious and depressing, but it cannot be ignored. But you can decide who is your family, you have the power to make bonds that are stronger than blood. You do not have to be tied down to those who share your genes, especially if they do not deserve to call themselves your family. If you haven't found your true family yet, I urge you, keep searching. One day, you will come home. One day, your pain will end, and you can look back on the holiday season with fresh eyes. These dark times will pass, for darkness is meaningless if there is no such thing as light.
If you made it this far, thank you for taking the time to listen, and I hope you enjoyed the story. Thank you for allowing me the chance to reach out to any others who are burdened with such estrangement this time of year. Apologies, I never meant for this to get so deep. Anyway, I'll be off working on my next project if you need me, so feel free to stay tuned and stick around for a while. If nowhere else will make you feel as though you belong, then know that you are always welcome here.
Take care, stay safe, and happy holidays.
Xlvieor