"Is that your best-"
SHINK!
Kamen Rider Zaia was sent flying away in an explosion.
Horobi sheathed his sword.
"Whoa! I didn't know your sword could do that, Horobi!" Jin gushed.
"Yes. I'm surprised I didn't use it sooner if it's this useful." Horobi agreed.
"You're…you're not supposed to do that!" Zaia yelled.
"...why not?" Horobi asked.
"...Fuck."
KAMEN RIDER ZERO ONE OTHERS, METSUBOUJINRAI: HOW IT SHOULD HAVE ENDED
"He's not an Ark. We can't do anything." Horobi said, while totally not pulling down his fedora.
"...Horobi…" Jin said, walking up to him and putting his hand on his shoulder. "...That is the dumbest thing you have ever said."
"...what?"
"Didn't you say our new purpose as was to protect human and humagear peace?" Jin asked.
"Yes, and that's by preventing the rise of any new Arks!"
"Arkland is still threatening human and humagear peace, though. Preventing something like that is our whole job now."
"...but uh…we….need to be…dramatic?"
Horobi's 3 teammates stared at him blankly.
"...Why is he our leader again?" Ikazuchi asked, walking away.
"Hey where you going!?" Horobi asked.
"Doing your job, moron." Ikazuchi called back as he walked away. "Which, honestly, we could've been doing sooner if you didn't keep being dramatic for no reason and we didn't waste time trying to mourn someone we should have no reason to mourn."
"But Azu was a consciousness!" Jin argued weakly.
"So was the Ark!"
"Yes, but…Azu…was…cute lookin?"
"Jin.." Naki put their hand on Jin's shoulder. "This isn't an anime. She was never gonna get off scott free just because she's cute."
Jin pouted.
Naki sighed, walking off to join Ikazuchi.
"..." Jin stared blankly at Horobi. "..."
"..." Horobi thought before groaning. "Fine!" He walked after Ikazuchi and Naki, Jin excitedly following him.
"Of course not. I'd turn you to scrap." Isamu answered Horobi.
Horobi laughed at that. "Thank you, Vulcan." Before walking away.
"...Horobi, if you need help with Zaia, just say so." Fuwa told him.
Horobi turned. "How did you?"
"Naki told me." Fuwa said, holding up his phone. "They called me and told me what was going on. Also told me you were being a massive idiot and trying to be deep."
"But…but the themes, man!" Horobi argued.
"Themes don't mean shit in bad storytelling." Fuwa deadpanned.
"...Fine, we need your help. Happy?"
"Very." Fuwa said. "Now come on. Maybe Hiden can help you with your MassBrain problem." He said, walking off.
Horobi followed, grumbling. "Stupid piece of…why'd he have to ruin this…the themes, man…"
"Don't worry, we're not gonna hurt you." Jin said on the video. "ZAIA is currently trying to sell Humagear soldiers out into the world to try to take over the military market. To do that, they've tried to turn us into an enemy they can fight over and over. We'll only be going after ZAIA, not anyone else."
"I mean, can you imagine how stupid it'd be if we just left this video on an ominous note that made it seem like we're the bad guys instead of just telling everyone the whole truth?" Ikazuchi laughed.
"Not to mention we helped out during the Eden crisis, so even though we were terrorists before, we aren't anymore." Naki pointed out, the video showing multiple camera feeds of Jin and Horobi fighting against the Abaddon Riders, plus Naki helping out with computers, plus Ikazuchi giving Aruto his bike. "So really, it'd be kinda stupid to think we're still the bad guys since we helped save the goddamn world."
"Thank you for your time." Jin said before waving. "Adios!"
The video ended.
"If the world needs that, we'll play the villain." Horobi said with a smug smirk.
"...Horobi we're not playing the villain." Jin said.
"What? Yes we are! The whole world thinks we're villains!" Horobi argued.
"No, not really." Ikazuchi said. "Playing the villain implies we're pretending to be villains. We're really not."
"Yes, you idiots thought it'd be a good idea to not tell everyone the full truth and end the video on an ominous note just for the sake of the plot happening." Naki pointed out, the other 3 sweat dropping.
"...True." Ikazuchi muttered.
"But the world thinks we're terrorists, they wouldn't believe us!" Jin argued.
"Then why send that video out at all?" Naki asked.
"To reassure them!"
"But you literally just said they wouldn't believe us because they think we're still terrorists."
"..." Jin tried to respond, but couldn't come up with anything.
"Yeah that's what I thought." Naki groaned. "Oh and also I got our tech upgraded." They said, handing out new keys and Slashrisers.
"Whoa…where'd you get all these?" Jin asked.
"Oh, being part of AIMS, which currently has good relations with Hiden Technology, I was able to work together with Yua and Izu in order to produce new power ups for all of us just so Jin won't be carrying the fights and we stand a better chance."
"But…But I thought-"
"That Yua couldn't do anything? Well…."
Flashback
"Alright, now to sign these forms, and Naki'll be a proper member of AIMS!" Yua said with some papers.
"Here's a bright idea." A man in some AIMS uniform said. "Why don't you talk about it with your higher ups before you go recruiting a former member of a terrorist organization and talk it out with them so you can make some arrangements to assure everyone Naki won't try to kill humanity again and risk a total PR nightmare just because you guys were too lazy to actually put some effort into your storytelling?"
"...Holy crap you're right." Yua said.
"...Wow that's smart." Jin said.
"I am the genius of us, after all." Naki said as everyone put on their Slashrisers. "Plus, I also told her and Vulcan to incapacitate, or failing that, kill us if we need to transform into Kamen Rider Metsuboujinrai and lose control."
Horobi grumbled, something about "themes" and whatnot.
"So as you can see!" Arkland shouted in the newsroom. "METSUBOUJINRAI IS A THREAT TO HUMANITY!"
"And why should we trust you?" Yua asked.
"...Excuse me?" Arkland asked.
"Why should we believe the word of ZAIA, a company who was led by a man who did plenty of shady business practices, and not only that, but created the Ark, which led to the creation of Metsuboujinrai and plenty of casualties?"
"And why should you trust Metsuboujinrai!?"
"Because," Yua clicked a button, and footage of Metsuboujinrai helping out during the Eden crisis played. "They are no longer terrorists."
"But…but they attacked us!"
"Funny you should mention that, since Naki, a former member of and a proud member of AIMS, gave me this." Yua played footage recorded from Naki of the whole ordeal between Metsuboujinrai and Arkland.
As everyone in the room started shouting questions at Arkland, he snarled. "You.."
"What, did you seriously think no one would think of this?"
"But you recruited a member of a former terrorist group!"
"Who, again, has displayed that they have no intention of harming humanity again, and we have taken several measures to assure people it will not happen. Plus, as provided by former CEO Gai Amatsu, we have several documents showing and proving that Metsuboujinrai were forced into working for the Ark and beforehand were just ordinary humagear." Yua told him, bringing up said documents on another screen. "...like…did you think we were that stupid?"
"...yes."
"..." Yua facepalmed.
"So after that, we watched as Arkland was taken to court and he's currently awaiting trial." Horobi explained, the 4 members of Metsuboujinrai sitting in a large roundchair surrounding a table, a man in black and magenta on the left and a younger man on the right.
"Ah. So…what happened to Azu again?" Tsukasa asked.
"She had a…to be honest, very underwhelming ending." Jin said. "Just…shot unceremoniously by Lyon's soldiers. Kinda thought there was gonna be more to her, but…well, she was ultimately kinda pointless."
"Yeah her only purpose seemed to be just facilitating the final arc between Aruto and Horobi and setting up the movie and V-Cinema villains &...that's it." Naki said.
"That…is disappointing." Sougo said, sipping coffee.
"I know right?" Ikazuchi said.
"So what're you going to do now?" Tsukasa asked.
"Well, me and Ikazuchi are going to go back to our jobs, thank goodness we know some people, and I'm looking to get Horobi and Jin official jobs now that some things are being cleared up." Naki explained.
"So…" Sougo said. "You doing anything else?"
"Well, that all depends on whether or not Toei wants to bring us back for more stuff in future crossovers or even a novel." Horobi explained.
"Probably best. This dude would probably just continue spouting philosophical nonsense." Jin said, elbowing Horobi.
"IT WAS DEEP!" Horobi protested.
"...I could swear, I have never met a dumber former villain in my life…" Tsukasa muttered.
"What'd you say!?" Horobi yelled, Ikazuchi and Jin trying to hold him back.
Sougo and Naki sighed, facepalming.
End