Chapter One – Bravery

Hermione had had bravery drilled into her skull since she had been sorted by the sorting hat into Gryffindor, it was now however when she needed it that she felt it fail her.

She should have known better, crying never got anyone anywhere but the words had hurt her in a way she didn't know was possible. Again. She had thought once she had found out she was a witch all of her bullying problems would be solved, instead she had traded them for new ones, ones with magic at their disposable.

All of her previous choices had thus led her to this. In front of her stood a towering hulk of a troll. She recognized from her books; she had not expected to see one this close though. It seemed to notice her in slow motion as it swung its club in her direction. Frozen in place from pure terror, she flung herself to the floor. Just Missing its swing.

It went again, this time she crawled into the bathroom stall, but soon her precious cover was demolished sending a shower of debris over her body, she crawled into the next one, her movement getting more urgent as the troll too got quicker, more determined with its swings.

That stall eviscerated too, and the next one, she sat in the corner crying. Tears streamed down her face as there was nowhere to run. The surroundings offered no more cover. The troll looming upon her. At that moment she decided she was going to be brave as she steadied her breath and looked at the troll. She saw the club coming and still didn't close her eyes. It hit her fragile small body with a crack. A strangled cry came from her throat unwillingly. She put her arms over her head trying to make herself as small as possible with the last remaining strength she had. It hadn't worked.

It hit her again, and this time she hadn't the strength to cry out, no air left in her lungs which felt as crushed as every other part of her.

She thought as darkness crept across the corners of her vision, she saw people, but she wasn't trusting her senses right now, she closed her eyes grateful for an end to the pain.

o0o0o0o

She wasn't awake, she knew that. Well, she thought she knew that. Moments seemed to pass by her, words, memories. Pain mostly. But certainly nothing concrete or reliable.

She kept reliving one moment over and over, the feeling of being crushed, bludgeoned to death. Over and over. Every moment seared into her brain. Replaying each moment slowly over and over again. Tempting her to think she could do something different this time, to find her fate already written. No control.

That's what that feeling was she thought. The lack of control. That's what bothered her. Helplessness. She had finally put her finger on it. And with that, she slipped away again.

She came back this time to hear a voice. She didn't recognize it. But it seemed calming, she liked that. She certainly couldn't make out words. But the time seemed kind. She fell this time into peaceful darkness.

She woke up to be in pain, all over her body. Every nerve ending was screaming at her. Her bones felt crushed. She tried to breathe; no air found its way into her lungs as she began to panic. The more she tried to breathe, the less air there seemed to be. And the more she felt pure terror set into her bones again. This time she started to cough. She felt congealed blood dribble from her lips and air finally became available. She took a panicked breath in, and immediately regretted it. It hurt like hell.

She didn't even try any more beyond that, breathing seemed hard enough. She managed to focus her eyes after a couple more minutes of just lying there. Eventually, she could make out a little of her surroundings. She didn't attempt to look around with her head but allowed her eyes to slowly drift.

The ceiling was non-descript, she seemed to have curtains pulled around her, it was a hospital room. As she realized this, she probably thought that whoever was in charge of her here would probably like it if she had alerted them to her alertness.

She tried calling out, but to her disappointment, all she managed were large hacking coughs as more blood seemed to erupt from her mouth.

This however seemed to get the attention of someone, as a couple of seconds later, hurried footsteps could be heard clattering on the flagstone floor. And soon the curtain parted. From her angle, he couldn't see anything about the person.

The person she instantly recognized from her voice as being a woman. "Oh, Merlin." The person came a little closer but she couldn't place her.

She waved a wand over her; she knew that was a thing. Magic was a thing, wasn't it? Or was she delusional? She wasn't sure. She felt a peculiar tingle run over her body. Not unpleasant but certainly weird.

The lady continued to wave her stick over her and more things continued to feel weird, finally, the woman stopped and moved closer to her.

"Miss Granger, it's nice to see you awake. You shouldn't move for just a bit, you were very badly injured, and due to the nature of your injuries, I haven't been able to use magic. I'm going to go fetch someone, we'll be back in a moment."

Hermione had no choice but to be patient tried speaking again, but after another disastrous coughing fit gave up and waited.

It didn't take long before the woman entered with another woman, she didn't recognize this woman either, though the expression on her face confused her.

"Miss Granger… It's nice to see you awake. May I ask? What do you remember about why you are here?"

Hermione opened her mouth and tried to answer when more blood appeared, the woman in a matrons uniform waved her wand and her airways cleared slightly. The blood disappeared from around her mouth too. She looked at her gratefully.

"There was a troll, in the bathroom… It hit me with its… club"

The woman looked at her nodding, "That's right, do you remember anything else?"

"I was crying, I don't… I don't know why? Can I ask…?" The woman nodded kindly. "Who are you?"

Both women's faces dropped, their eyes widened. Mouths agape, skin ashen.

Hermione continued. "I don't remember, I… what…?"

"It's ok dear, you had some very serious head injuries. You've been in a coma for a little while, we weren't sure you were going to pull through." The other woman said.

Hermione's heart dropped; she had been in a coma. She knew that somewhere but the dots hadn't connected quite yet. "How long?" she asked beginning to grow weary.

The two women exchanged glances. "Eight months."

Hermione felt the blood leave her brain as she fainted dead to the world.

o0o0o0o

Time moved slowly in the hospital wing, there was a lot of sleeping. She still hadn't managed to move yet, madame Pomphrey said that the body had a lot of healing to do before she was ready for that. The other lady Professor McGonagall came in nearly every day for a little while trying to help with her memories but it didn't feel real. She didn't know any of these things. She felt like that was another person.

When she had first seen herself in the mirror, she was lost for words, her hair was grey for a start. Still bushy and almost sentient but all of its brown luscious colour stripped from it, leaving it a grey instead. It had been explained that it had been a result of the extreme stress on her body, that it couldn't be helped. The second thing she noticed when her bandages had come off were the scars. Most of the small ones had healed nicely, but there were quite a few larger ones that would never be gone. Hermione took the time to look over each one, there was a jagged one across her face where the club had hit her and a few more covering her body. She sighed, a small price to pay for being alive.

Time continued to pass. She was at first thrilled to be able to start moving again, it quickly wore off. Physiotherapy was hell.

She had to keep going, all those months not moving had caused most of her muscles to atrophy and her bones needed all the help they could get. Repetition over and over again. The same exercises day in, day out. But it was working. She could finally after weeks walk on her own. It was painful, annoying but she was finally getting there. Madame Pomphrey looked pleased as she finally discharged her. She still had to come back every day for therapy but she now had free range of the castle to practice walking in, which was greatly encouraged.

Every night she woke up screaming, nightmares were her often companion, memories of her time at the mercy of the troll, her body bruised and battered. It had got to the point where silencing wards were placed around her bed each night.

As they walked to the defence classroom for practical, they passed the bathroom. She felt her throat tighten a little as she glanced off to the left on her way up. There a door stood, inconspicuous. But she did remember this one. She remembered hoping, praying she could cross its threshold. Instead, she was battered into a coma.

McGonagall seemed oblivious as Hermione remembered feeling helpless, feeling cowardly. She had been reminded of her house ideals. Braver and courage. She wasn't going to disappoint them again.

She took a breath, turned her head slightly to the right and walked calmly past it, not letting any discomfort show. Her face hardened into a mask. Eyes hardened lips pursed together; she would never, ever allow herself to feel so utterly helpless ever again.

At that moment, while no one, in particular, was paying attention, that the old Hermione Granger vanished, wiped as clean as her memory, and was replaced by another individual entirely. Someone that no one had ever expected.

Hermione had been changed forever.

o0o0o0o